For the March 27 issue of The New Yorker, writer Sheila Marikar gained access to a Goop meeting about the vitamin line in which it’s revealed that Paltrow’s quietly taken over as Goop CEO after Lisa Gersh left last year.
The actor turned lifestyle guru — whose site sells necessities like a “vaginal muscle-toning egg made of jade” — whines to staffers, “I mean, the board did make me CEO. It wasn’t my fault. It wasn’t my decision.” She says during a debate over whether to refer to her as CEO in a newsletter, “Ugh, you guys are giving me agita.”
The vitamin line includes concoctions with cheeky names like “Why Am I So Effing Tired” and “High School Genes” — which Paltrow says one top Goop exec wanted to name “The FUPA Blaster.” That proclamation leaves one meeting attendee — Dr. Alejandro Junger, a “Uruguayan cardiologist … whose help Paltrow enlisted for her vitamin business” — looking “puzzled,” the piece reports. The erudite mag elegantly describes “FUPA” as “an acronym for a fat upper pubic area; some people substitute a different ‘P’ word.”
When the topic of selling vitamins for intravenous use comes up in the meeting, Paltrow muses, “I think mainlining vitamins might be going a bit far, even for us.”