The bridesmaid, who posted anonymously on Reddit, complained that the bride, a friend of hers for over 12 years, “wouldn’t accept finals as my reason to not attend her out of state bachelorette party.”
“There was just one weekend thrown out to have both a bridal shower and bachelorette party, in a city 600 miles away from me. Unfortunately, it is the weekend that my finals and group projects are due for graduate school and it's the first week of school for me, as I work as a behavior therapist in a school,” the bridesmaid writes.
Though she explained this to the bride-to-be, along with several other weekends when she would be available, the anonymous bridesmaid said the bride would not budge on the weekend.
“Against the wishes of my husband and therapist, who I'm working with to say no during this busy time in my life, I agreed to make it work, and have made arrangements to take finals early and have [been] working with my group to try to finish our work before we leave,” she wrote.
After making arrangements to take her finals early, miss days from work and finish her group project early, the anonymous poster said she has received no more information about the events.
“I have not been told a schedule, don't know where we're staying, how much anything will cost, etc. The [maid of honor] has been flaky with email, didn't tell me which airport to fly into (since the initial thought was bridal shower in one city and bach party in another, but who knows what the plan is now) so now I'm driving 8 hours on Friday to get there,” she wrote, noting that the bride also asked her to drive people from the bachelorette party to the bridal shower adding two hours to her trip.
At the end of the saga, the bridesmaid asks for advice on how to handle the situation, which she writes has left her increasingly “bitter.”
Those on Reddit were quick to offer their advice — with most all shaming the bride-to-be’s actions.
“Your career (and the education required to get into that career) is far more important than a party. The bride should understand that,” one wrote.
“[Original poster] should definitely not go to this party anymore,” another wrote.
“There's a point where it's not the bridezilla's fault anymore. The bridesmaid needs to get a backbone, and put her work and school commitments first. Her therapist telling her to say 'no' to people wasn't a big red flag?” another wrote, blaming the bridesmaid for agreeing to go.
“Don't go. You'll do better on your exams and project, even if you've rescheduled. These things will affect the rest of your life, and for the better. Your friend seems to not care at all about your needs and accomplishments. Why sacrifice your actual future to the lame non-plans of someone who doesn't care? Stay home,” another commented.
The bridesmaid did update her post with a thank you to all who responded — though she did not share whether or not she is still planning on attending the parties.