After the backlash of his role as Jar Jar Binks nearly two decades ago, "Star Wars" actor Ahmed Best says he once considered taking his life.
On Tuesday, Best opened up on social media about the resentment he faced, noting that "it's still hard to talk about."
"I’ve been thinking of doing a twenty year #ThePhantomMenace solo show next year. I don’t talk a lot about my experience as #jarjarbinks because a lot of it is very painful," the 44-year-old actor captioned a photo of himself and his son.
He continued: "I faced a media backlash that still affects my career today. This was the place I almost ended my life. It’s still hard to talk about. I survived and now this little guy is my gift for survival. I’m ready to tell this story but I’m curious to know if a show like this is something people want to see. Lemme know. #depressionisreal #survivor #soninmyeyes #fathersonvacay."
Best appeared as Jar Jar Binks in the "Star Wars" prequel "The Phantom Menace" in 1999. It was his first major role in a movie. In 2002, Best reprised his role for the prequel, "Attack of the Clones," and then one more time for 2005's "Revenge of the Sith."
Jar Jar Binks, created by George Lucas, was not well-received by fans of the original trilogy.
Last year, Best told Wired that he "had death threats through the internet."
“I had people come to me and say, ‘You destroyed my childhood.’ That’s difficult for a 25-year-old to hear," said Best, who went on to explain how his "Star Wars" role ultimately affected his career.
"It’s really difficult to articulate the feeling," Best told the outlet. "You feel like a success and a failure at the exact same time. I was staring at the end of my career before it started.”
Best also admitted in the interview that it caused "a lot of pain" for him.
“There were a lot of tears, there was a lot of pain, there was a lot of s--t I had to deal with,” he shared. “Everybody else went on. Everybody else worked. Everybody else was accepted by the zeitgeist.”
“I did a bunch of movies that I wasn’t 100 percent proud of just to pay the bills," he added. "To be honest, failing and being black is very scary, because we don’t get a lot of chances, you know?"
"I didn’t get another chance after Jar Jar. No one said, ‘You know, that didn’t work. But I believe in you, and you’re a good actor.’ I didn’t get another chance. I just struck out. But as soon as I started doing my own thing, that’s when things took off."