Hilary Duff Instagrams Her 'Freckles' and Monarch Room Serves a Secret 'Off-the-Menu' Burger

Here's everything that's going on:

Under the guise of showing off her "freckles," actress and singer Hilary Duff posted a cleavage-heavy selfie (below) to Instagram. Now, under the guise of pretending to care about her freckles, let's all have a look.

Does the secret to the perfect burger elude you? Maybe you're just fussing too much. Watch the video above to try the recipe for Monarch Room's mouthwatering off-the-menu burger — made with liberal seasoning and a killer burger sauce — courtesy of executive chef Michael Citarella.

Screen legend Lauren Bacall, the beloved star of such films as "The Big Sleep" and "To Have and Have Not," suffered a fatal stroke on Tuesday at her Manhattan residence. She was 89.

Michelle Rodriguez tried to skinny dip after her friend's Ireland wedding, but found herself naked and "shin deep" in mud instead. And despite this obvious failure, she still uploaded a video of the event to Instagram, because how else would she show everyone her butt.

Apparently not content to merely soil our memories of "Saved by the Bell," Lifetime is reportedly planning to air "The Brittany Murphy Story," a biopic based on the life of the late "Clueless" and "King of the Hill" actress.

Kim Kardashian told People magazine that Kanye likes her better as a blonde, and that he once even asked if she'd consider dyeing her hair light again. But, to Kardashian's credit, she refused to become a completely different person than the woman he married.

Warner Bros. is reportedly working on two separate scripts for an Aquaman movie, presumably to ensure that at least one of them can provide a plausible explanation as to how Jason Momoa squeezes into a mer-man suit every morning.

According to the New York Post, Michael Jackson's former Neverland housekeepers have accused the King of Pop of being "the dirtiest, most unsanitary person in Hollywood," claiming that he urinated on the floor and tracked animal feces in through the house. What a magical place Neverland was!

Now that breastfeeding photos are all the rage, Hilaria Baldwin posted one of her own in which she's lounging on the beach in a bikini (below). And it's a good thing she clarified that she was breast feeding, because without that caption, we'd swear she was just burying a small child in the sand.

"Game of Thrones" author George R.R. Martin has revealed that a few imaginative fans (he won't say who) have correctly guessed how his series will end. Therefore, our theory (that Martin read a bunch of online fan theories and picked the best one for his surprise ending) is still entirely possible.

Despite having no modeling experience of note, Audrey Hepburn's granddaughter Emma Ferrer will be appearing on the cover (and within) the September issue of Harper's Bazaar. (Let's all hope the Hepburn name doesn't earn her a position as an unlicensed heart surgeon, too.)

Blake Lively told Marie Claire magazine that she wants a big family with husband Ryan Reynolds, and would "spit out a litter of kids," if she could. Ryan, on the other hand, seems to be more interested in ice cream sundaes. No joke.

And finally, a woman in South Carolina stabbed her dining companion after he tried to eat her pasta sauce before it was ready. This woman is now in custody at a York County jail, where the kitchen staff presumably serves pasta sauce however they darn well please. Probably with overcooked ziti, too.