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Jamie Lynn Spears is opening up about her life – including her relationship with her sister and growing up in her shadow.
The 30-year-old country singer and sister of Britney Spears appeared on the latest episode of the "Call Her Daddy" podcast – the first of two parts, with the second airing Wednesday – and spoke to host Alex Cooper about her life, which is chronicled in her new book "Things I Should Have Said."
Among the many things that Jamie Lynn discussed was the social media attention she's been getting lately, saying that the most hurtful posts she sees are ones claiming she "didn't do anything to try and help my sister."
"I very much did many things," she stated.
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Also in the interview, Spears recalled her childhood with her mother Lynne and father Jamie, who she said abused alcohol. The singer said that she wanted her mother to "stand up for" her during her childhood, as Jamie could be a thorn in their side at times.
As far as her relationship with Britney, the "Zoey 101" alum said the pop star felt like a "protector" during their childhood.
Jamie Lynn Spears (left) insisted that she "did many things" to help her older sister, Britney Spears (right) amid her conservatorship and family turmoil. (C Flanigan/WireImage | Kevin Mazur/WireImage)
"I admired her too," she gushed. "I loved her – everything about her."
In the late 1990s, Britney skyrocketed to stardom, leaving a young Jamie Lynn feeling "confused" at first until someone compared her sister to Mariah Carey, helping her to connect the dots.
Furthermore, Jamie Lynn said she was "so proud" of her sister as she found success in the music industry. She noted, however, that she felt she had to "stay out of the way" to avoid messing "anything up for anybody."
Jamie Lynn then talked about Justin Timberlake, who dated Britney from 1999-2002. In her book, Jamie Lynn referred to the "Cry Me a River" singer as a healthy father figure to her.
"That was a really, maybe, good time in perhaps all of our lives," Jamie Lynn said during her podcast appearance on Monday night. "Perhaps he was in that, so I remember him fondly because that was probably one of the best times in the whole family's life."
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She continued: "Things were good and we were experiencing the good side of things."
The singer recalled Timberlake, now 40, being "thoughtful" and "funny." When the couple split, Jamie Lynn was left feeling "so sad" because "everybody thought it was forever."
Jamie Lynn then spoke about a change she saw in her sister as the weight of her career began bearing down on her.
Jamie Lynn Spears recalled her family's "messed up" dynamics that came about in part due to Britney Spears becoming the family's breadwinner. (AP Photos)
"She was wanting to escape us a little bit more," Jamie Lynn recalled, noting that her sister was of an age that generally sees youngsters spend more time away from their family.
Jamie Lynn then addressed a story she tells in the book, claiming that her sister once locked the two of them in a bedroom with a knife after saying "I'm scared" over and over.
"This had come right after the whole marriage in Vegas and stuff," Jamie Lynn said of her sister's short-lived marriage to Jason Alexander. "… It was really scary and I felt really unsafe."
She added that she "didn't understand" what was happening, especially because she would turn to her sister when she was scared herself, making her fear much more confusing.
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"Because I was not allowed to have feelings about anything – like, ‘shut up,’ like, ‘that’s fine,' like, ‘whatever, we’re not gonna make a big deal out of this – I started to really not make a big deal out of things," she said, noting that she's "coming to terms" with the severity of such experiences as she shares them publicly.
Jamie Lynn clarified that she was never afraid that Britney would hurt her, but that the situation "felt weird." When she told their parents, they asked her to recount the experience to a "therapist" before she "never heard anything else about it."
Jamie Lynn Spears addressed rumors that she's jealous of her sister, explaining that she believes Britney Spears to be "the most bada-- performer that ever walked on this Earth." (Image Group LA/Disney Channel via Getty Images)
"I think that this was a brilliant young woman who was going through a hard time and if she couldn't stand up for herself, then somebody should have. I wasn't an adult then, I couldn't," Jamie Lynn said of her sister. "Somebody should have said, ‘Stop the f--king presses, give this girl a f--king minute.’"
Jamie Lynn also addressed another passage of the book in which she recalls her mother hitting her with a purse containing a camera. At the time, she ran away from her mother a payphone to call her older brother, Bryan.
"I will say I was particularly an exceptional a--hole to my mother a lot and I do regret a lot of things that I probably could've done better to her," said the singer. "The only reason I was being mean to her is because I just wanted her to stand up for me or stand up for herself. I think that just became all too much."
Jamie Lynn and her mother have "talked about" what happened, but she said she didn't tell many other people what happened, including a makeup artist who saw bruises on her neck.
The star then addressed why she's coming forward now, explaining that telling her story and respecting her own experiences is a healing process for her after growing up knowing she had to maintain a certain "brand."
"It wasn't even really my brand," she said. "I was a prop to a lot of things, but at the same time, I was never allowed to control my own narrative or have my own voice unless it was in line with everything. I was never allowed to do anything or say anything that would possibly put my sister in a bad light."
Growing up, Jamie Lynn said that she and Britney never compared themselves to one another, but "the world did."
"My sister, to this day, is going to always be to me the most bada-- performer that ever walked on this Earth. Nothing's going to change that," she explained. "The problem was that I couldn't be responsible for everything that happened around her and also be authentic to myself. And I wasn't allowed to be."
Next, she recounted her family's "messed up" dynamics that became clear when Britney offered to buy her mother a house to get her away from Jamie.
Once their parents divorced, Jamie Lynn remembered very little changing – including their parents' relationship – though she admitted that Jamie "had a problem with" his child being the breadwinner and he "didn't want to live in that house because Britney had paid for it."
In 2007, Britney famously shaved her head at the height of a public meltdown, which her younger sister remembers clearly.
"I had been at a basketball game cheerleading because I was a cheerleader, and we got home and my friend – that's back when you went on the blogs – they were like, ‘Oh my God, Jamie Lynn, do you want to see this?" The star remembered. "I was like, ’What do you mean?' … I was by myself, I didn't have my momma or daddy, they were there trying to help her. I was by myself and I had to pretend like it didn't bother me."
"I just wanted to be with her, you know?" she said when asked if she was surprised by the meltdown. "… All I wanted to do was go home and get in my own bed, and I just had to stay at my friend's house because my mom was out of town."
At this point, Jamie Lynn said she "disconnected" herself from her life, and has gaps in her memory and pictures she doesn't recognize. School became difficult for her, but she trudged through, she said, even when teachers would occasionally "make comments" about her situation.
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When Jamie Lynn became pregnant at 16, she was ushered off to a house in a location still unknown to her to avoid paparazzi and the exclusive announcement was sold to OK! Magazine – which is how Britney found out about the baby.
"I don't even know who put me where I was at, but at the same time, why couldn't I tell my sister?" she said. "That was what I was told was the best thing to do and I just didn't even have the energy to fight back."
The star was told it was "too risky" to tell her sister about her pregnancy – though she wasn't sure why.
"Maybe they thought because maybe she would say something before the article came out," she said, noting she wasn't specifically told not to tell her sister but was told to tell "no one" about the news. "… I think that Britney was obviously going through her own s--t, but I think I was so absorbed in my own s--t, that I couldn't even think about that."
Jamie Lynn Spears said she was ushered to an unknown location after becoming pregnant until the announcement was made. ( John Shearer/WireImage)
"I just can't believe that they wouldn't have made sure she knew," she said. "Like I can't believe that somebody wouldn't have done that."
Jamie Lynn added that she feels as though Britney may not have realized how little control Jamie Lynn had over the situation and may have assumed that she was intentionally left out of the loop.
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"I think, at first, that was something that maybe was harmful and hurtful to her, but I was hurting just as bad because I was kind of pissed off, like, ‘I want my sister here, why isn’t she coming to save me?'" she explained. "Then also not understanding that she's on the other side of the world."
After the pregnancy announcement, Jamie Lynn said she experienced "extreme disassociation" and had "closed myself off from" Britney's situations, including her hospitalizations for mental health.
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"My dad was handling that and my mom was with me and I didn't know what was going on and I wasn't let in to know," she said. "I was just an afterthought. I had no idea. I saw it like the rest of the world."
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