Lindsay Lohan's Topless Selfie and Jackson Galaxy's Theory on 'Cat Mojo'

This is what's going down, everybody:

Earlier this week, while all the other actors were likely going over their lines, Lindsay Lohan Instagrammed a topless selfie (below) from the dressing room of her London play. Because why rehearse for a few hundred theater-goers when there's the potential for millions to see your topless, covering-your-naked-breasts-like-a-mermaid pose?

Jackson Galaxy, the host of Animal Planet's "My Cat From Hell," has some tips for all you cat lovers out there. The first step, as he says, is understanding "cat mojo." Hear more about his theory in the video above.

Ireland Baldwin celebrated her 19th birthday on Thursday by sharing a quartet of sultry snapshots on Instagram (below). Men everywhere celebrated too, although they were more or less celebrating the fact that they're officially one year removed from ogling an underage girl, and thus one year less creepy.

During Thursday night's episode of "Jimmy Kimmel Live," Taylor Swift performed for 15,000 fans on Hollywood Boulevard, effectively closing down the street. Among the tunes she sang were "Shake it Off" and "Out of the Woods," the latter of which is embedded below, only because you're probably not sick of that one yet:

And Just in time for Halloween, Taylor Swift revealed to Ellen Degeneres that she's terrified of both sea urchins and being framed for a crime. So listen up, Taylor Swift's friends: You've got less than a week to gather a jail cell full of sea urchins for this year's elaborate Halloween prank.

On Wednesday night's episode of "Watch What Happens Live," Jenny McCarthy claimed that her husband, Donny Wahlberg, has "the most beautiful penis" she's ever seen. But if she thinks his is impressive, she should check out an echidna's. It's quadruple pronged!

Celebrity tattoo artist Kat Von D's tattoo shop went up in flames on Thursday morning, so TMZ waited outside until they got footage of her losing her temper with the paparazi (below). But we must say, aside from knocking a cap off the camerawoman, she behaved slightly better than we would if we just lost our livelihood in a fire.

Despite never seeming to have a proper job herself, Kim Kardashian told the Evening Standard that her daughter "will have to work for what she wants." Or, you know, maybe North can just sue her mother for all the money she earned as a reluctant toddler fashion model when she finally comes of age.

"Girls" creator and actress Lena Dunham dyed her hair mint green the other day (below), possibly for an episode of her HBO show in which she dyes her hair for a Halloween party, then gets naked for no discernible reason. Just a guess.

Screenwriter Aaron Sorkin announced to that Christian Bale will be portraying Steve Jobs in the upcoming biopic he's written. So it's time to quietly forget about Ashton Kutcher's portrayal, just like you forgot about your last-generation iPhones or iPods.

On Thursday, Kate Middleton attended the Action on Addiction charity gala in London wearing  with meshy, see-through portions down the arms and legs. It's modest, yes, but don't pretend you wouldn't have been charmed up to your eyeballs like dude in the photo below:

According to Deadline, FOX is planning to air a new television series based on Archie Comics. Called "Riverdale," it's expected to explore the "weirdness bubbling beneath" the gang's fictional town, and it's also expected to debut about 50 years too late.

And finally, Zelda Williams, the daughter of Robin Williams, recently revealed a new wrist tattoo in honor of her late father (below). She chose a robin, if you couldn't tell, which is much more fitting and touching image than the other option, which we're guessing was a teeny mural of Williamses. Y'know — Serena, Hank, Billy Dee, and the like.