Government Motors -- Coming to a Showroom Near You

By Patrick DorinsonPolitical Commentator

Now that General Motors has effectively been taken over by the government and Chrysler has been given last rites, it might be helpful to see what kind of cars the government might produce.

We only have to look at the results other government's attempts at producing cars -- the Soviet Union and their Eastern Bloc allies during the Cold War.

Beginning next year, cars will only be available for members of the Politburo, er, I mean Congress and the federal government. Private ownership of cars will be decided by your local neighborhood Soviet, I mean City Council. Each state will have a quota on how many cars are privately owned and the quota will be determined by the current carbon footprint of the state in question. Sorry California, no cars for you.

The wait time for a new GM aka Government Motors car will be two years after a person has been approved by the Commissar of Cars. And you will be able to select from a wide palette of colors --black, white or gray.

So tell me America, what's it gonna take to get you behind the wheel of a Volga? Or a Trabant? How about a Miscovitz?


Get rid of your old gas guzzler and ease into the bucket seats (literally buckets) of a GM car!

Check out these cars!!

How about a station wagonto haul the whole family to Re-Education Camp this summer?

Take a peek at GM's answer to the Mini!!

Look out NASCAR! Here comes the Trabant GTI!!!

Soviet Luxury at a Low Price!