Here's the deal:
Sports Illustrated swimsuit model Gigi Hadid shared yet another photo in her Calvin Klein underwear on Instagram, again looking as happy as ever. Who knew you could have so much fun in bed while still wearing underpants?!?
We love the smell of fall in the air, but we'd rather it be liquified, mixed with booze, and poured down our throats. Watch the video above to see how NYC restaurant L'Apicio does just that with their "Manhattan in the Fall" cocktail, which captures the warm flavors of the season.
In response to Kim Kardashian's naked butt on the cover of Paper magazine, Chelsea Handler posted a shot of her own naked butt to Instagram (link is NSFW, obviously). So perhaps Kim has ushered in a new era of celebrity naked butt photos from women of all backgrounds and ages. Your move, Queen Elizabeth II.
Just a day after debuting Kim Kardashian's rear-view cover photo, Paper magazine released another cover where Kim goes full-frontal (link leads to censored preview). So if they continue at this current rate, their Spring 2015 issue will feature screenshots from Kim's 2007 sex tape. (Everything always comes full circle.)
The new cover of Bloomberg Businessweek is just a close-up picture of Taylor Swift's face (below) along with the words "Taylor Swift Is the Music Industry." According to the same cover, however, her article doesn't start until page 62. So while she is the music industry, she has not yet conquered the telecommunications or automotive industries. They still need some coverage.
Among other items, personal love letters between Joe DiMaggio to Marilyn Monroe will be going up for auction next month. Included in the lot is a heartbreaking note he sent when he learned of her wishes to divorce him, so let's just go ahead and assume the entire collection is equally depressing, if not outright haunted.
Forget Seinfeld; Justin Bieber is the new king of observational humor. In an Instagram video he posted on Wednesday, Bieber enlisted Kendall Jenner to help point out the vast difference between their coffee cup sizes (below). Next up, perhaps he'll take on espesso mugs. Why are they so small? Am I right, people?
Amid rumors that she was dating a convicted child molester, "Honey Boo Boo" matriarch Mama June admitted that two of her children, Pumpkin and Jessica, were fathered by a completely different convicted sex offender. Man, that Sugar Bear guy is looking more and more like Prince Charming every minute, isn't he?
Katy Perry recently opened a pop-up shop in Melbourne, Australia, where fans can purchase pizza-print, cat-themed, or junk-food-studded clothes — inspired by Katy — that they will never have any use for outside of a Katy Perry costume party.
The Robertson family of "Duck Dynasty" will be adapting their story into a Broadway-style musical, set to debut in Las Vegas next year. Few more details about the project are known, but seeing as the Robertsons have final say over the production, we're assuming the entire orchestra is comprised of duck and mallard calls.
"America's Got Talent" judge Heidi Klum is currently appearing nude in the new ad campaign for Sharper Image (below), possibly because Sharper Image thinks we'll subconsciously associate Heidi's chest with their new chest-strap-free heart-rate monitor. So clever!
And finally, Paris Hilton was named the "Best Female DJ" of 2014 by French radio station NRJ, but only because they've never heard your mom's sick playlist at this year's Fourth of July barbecue. When she kicked the bass up after the drop, I nearly spilled ketchup all over my nice khaki pants!