Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman recently celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary. The couple’s love for each other is evident on every red carpet and in each interview, and during a recent sit-down with People, Kidman opened up about supporting her husband through his journey of sobriety.

“When you find a partner who gets you and you get him, it’s very safe, it’s very healing,” she tells People editor Jess Cagle before offering advice to loved ones of an addict. “Put your hand up, reach out. There is absolutely help out there. You can’t save somebody, they’ve got to save themselves, which is a very big thing for people like me who go, ‘I can take care of you. I can do it.’”

She added that the loved one can’t put in all the effort. Instead, it is the addict who has to decide for himself.

“At some point, you just have to say, ‘I love you and I’m here when you decide to do the work. If you don’t, then that’s it.’”

Urban has spoken out publicly about his addiction, which started in the ’90s during the early years of his career. He checked himself into the Betty Ford Center in Palm Springs in 2007, four months after he and Kidman wed. He took that course of action after Kidman staged an intervention.

“Nicole listened to her heart and did what she felt was the right thing to do,” Urban told People in 2007. “To see that kind of love in action, that’s very moving and deeply inspiring and just makes me want to be a better man.”

“I caused the implosion of my fresh marriage,” he said at the opening of his Country Music Hall of Fame exhibit. “It survived, but it’s a miracle it did. I was spiritually awoken with her. I use the expression ‘I was born into her,’ and that’s how I feel. And for the first time in my life, I could shake off the shackles of addiction.”