'The Five' reveal their 'Turkeys of the Year'
Kimberly Guilfoyle, Dana Perino, Greg Gutfeld, Eric Bolling and Eboni Williams continue the annual Thanksgiving tradition
This is a rush transcript from "The Five," November 24, 2016. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
KIMBERLY GUILFOYLE, CO-HOST: Happy Thanksgiving, America. Hello, everyone. I'm Kimberly Guilfoyle along with Eboni Williams, Eric Bolling, Dana Perino and Greg Gutfeld. It's 5:00 in New York City, and this is "The Five."
Welcome to our Thanksgiving special. We are so very thankful you are able to join us tonight. We've got a big show for you ahead. But first, our deepest gratitude to the men and women serving this great country and to our veterans, we are the land of the free because you are the brave. Thank you for your service and your sacrifice.
And on this turkey day, we have a beautiful bird. And all the tasty trimmings here on this table that we cannot -- you know this is the truth - - wait to dive into. But before we do, it's an annual tradition on "The Five" to select the turkeys of the year. I'm going to kick it off with my turkey pick, the Clinton Foundation. Here is a quick flashback.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
CHRIS WALLACE, FOX NEWS: Why isn't what happened and what went on between you and the Clinton Foundation, why isn't it what Mr. Trump calls play-to-play?
HILLARY CLINTON, FORMER PRESIDENTIAL NOMINEE: Well, everything I did as Secretary of State was in furtherance of our country's interests and our values.
WALLACE: The specific question went to pay for play. Do you want to talk about that?
CLINTON: Yes, but there is no evidence --
DONALD TRUMP, PRESIDENT-ELECT: I think it's been very --
WALLACE: Let's ask Mr. Trump --
CLINTON: There's a lot of evidence about the very good work --
TRUMP: It's been very well studied. It's a criminal enterprise and so many people know.
CLINTON: And the high rankings that the --
(CROSSTALK)
TRUMP: It's a criminal enterprise --
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: OK, well, obviously, a lot of discussion during the campaign about the Clinton Foundation, the e-mail scandal, all of that. Let's see, I don't know, Dana, if the Clinton Foundation is going to be able to weather the storm.
DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: It will be interesting how they try to move forward with it. I remember when Greg earlier this year, when you called it a scandal prophylactic.
GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: Yes.
PERINO: Because with the Clinton Foundation, if you are going to criticize it, you would always preface it or feel the responsibility to preface it by saying they've done a lot of good work but.
GUILFOYLE: But.
GUTFELD: It's a scandal condom. See you can't say prophylactic.
GUILFOYLE: Which actually just freaked me out already.
GUTFELD: No, because if you create a charity to protect yourself from people accusing you of things, I think -- I think they should build a wall around the Clinton Foundation.
GUILFOYLE: OK. All right.
GUTFELD: And make Hillary pay for it.
GUILFIYLE: OK, that's another good idea. They certainly have the cash to do so. Eric, this was something that bothered you throughout the campaign as well and a lot of Americans. It was problematic for her campaign.
ERIC BOLLING, CO-HOST: I don't think it's over. I don't think it's beginning to be over. I think if you call it a turkey -- it's going to keep growing and growing.
GUILFOYLE: Into an ostrich?
BOLLING: Well, an ostrich farm. There are so many loose ends on so many deals that were done in the Clinton Foundation, the pay to play stuff. Yes, they do good stuff. They spend a lot of money, absolutely. But the way they raise some of the money, the access they provided to raise the money is problematic. It's going to be problematic going forward. And as we find out more and more, you know, there are a whole slew of people who did -- who are e-mailing with Clinton and emailing with other foreign leaders. As those e-mails turn up and as the investigation continues, whether or not Donald Trump goes to the point of special prosecutor or not, they are still investigating this. It's not over.
GUILFOYLE: Yes, all right. So, there you go. The turkey ain't cooked on the Clinton Foundation.
EBONI WILLIAMS, GUEST CO-HOST: It ain't even close, KG. Yes, I sit at this table, right, you know, kind of fruit of the poisonous tree analogy (inaudible) because everyone says, they do good work. But you've got to consider, you know, the resources from which you get all this money to do this good work. And that's important and that counts.
Look, I mean I think 30 percent they're down fund-raising. So, it's like yes, you lost the White House and your chief mechanism for enriching yourself and providing for, you know, your own financial, I guess, progress as a family. It's got a big dent in it too so this was totally a lose-lose perfect turkey.
GUTFELD: But it also shows that's why people were giving.
BOLLING: Yes, because they wanted access.
GUTFELD: Yes and --
WILLIAMS: Absolutely.
GUTFELD: Once you bought --
GUILFOYLE: Great, great point.
GUTFELD: Thanks. I stole it.
PERINO: You should enter that into the court (ph).
GUILOYLE: I knew you couldn't come up with an original thought like that. All right, Dana, what's your turkey?
PERINO: OK, so I went non-political, kind of. This is Colin Kaepernick, the quarterback of the San Francisco -- what are they?
GUILFOYLE: Forty-niners.
PERINO: I want to say giants.
GUILFOYLE: That's the baseball team.
PERINO: That's the baseball team. OK. It's the 49ers -- because for the past year, he has been basically kneeling during the national anthem because he was protesting racial injustice and things that he cares so much. But Steven Smith of ESPN called him out on that when he found out he didn't even vote.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
STEVEN SMITH, SPORTS COMMENTATOR, ESPN: Colin Kaepernick, after all this noise that you made, even though you didn't intend to do so by offending our military servicemen and women and pointing out about how you wanted to bring attention to racial injustices and beyond in this country, to turn around and not to even take your behind to the polls to vote for a particular candidate, it is shameful. For him not to vote, as far as I'm concerned, everything he said meant absolutely nothing.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUILFOYLE: Amen.
PERINO: I don't think I can add to that. Greg, you and KG are 49ers.
GUTFELD: It's hard to -- it's actually kind of hard to be a 49er fan this year because it's like, you know, we talked about this a lot. Politics should -- is fun to talk about, but it shouldn't invade specific areas. And when all of a sudden -- I don't want to know what he thinks if he doesn't want to know if I play football. So let's keep it that way. Also, he just did this because he felt irrelevant and he wanted to feel important. He didn't want to be seen as a dumb jock. And he probably had, you know, he wanted to see beyond his career and so this is what he did. It was phony.
BOLLING: Yes. Don't forget he was riding the bench when he did this and he needed -- you know, when you are a big-time athlete for all these years all of a sudden you find yourself on the bench and you go, wait a minute, the spotlight is not on me anymore, you know, and you do something like this and you get a ton of spotlight. It's hard to give up the spotlight. I think that's what it was. And then for him not to have enough guts to go vote.
PERINO: Take the time.
BOLLING: Just go. Absentee vote, go for it, but that's weak.
WILLIAMS: I'll say this, I don't know if it was phony but I do know this much, he got a big part of what -- if you take him at what he was trying to do wrong -- it's called a protest vote. Meaning that he said he didn't want to be a hypocrite, right, because he spoke out publicly against both Trump and Hillary Clinton. But then we find out he wasn't even registered to vote. But you have to vote for one of the major party nominees in this country. That's one of the great things about our --
(CROSSTALK)
WILLIAMS: You can write in a third party. You can vote for one of the third party.
GUTFELD: He doesn't follow politics.
WILLIAMS: He didn't do anything so that's why I had a problem with that.
GUILFOYLE: And he threw America shade and we will not have that. All right, Greg, what's your turkey of the year?
GUTFELD: Well, OK. So, I redefine turkey as someone who makes sacrifices so I picked Billy bush. As you know the Billy -- in the controversy with the butts and the hot mike and Donald Trump and Billy were heard saying awful things, Donald Trump ends up becoming president. Billy Bush ends up a nobody back in L.A. with $ 8 million. Here's my theory. A turkey is someone who gives his life for something else and we learned two things from Billy Bush.
Beware at all times of being recorded. You learn, like, he had a hot mike on and he forgot. A lot of people do that. A lot of what you say is caught whether you know it or not and it's a good thing to remember. And he taught you a lesson you shouldn't always be polite. Every one of us has been in a situation -- at least I know I have when I was in magazines where I would be interviewing like a hip hop star or a rock star and they start saying stuff that's like kind of weird, but you're kind of just nodding along, yeah, that's funny.
PERINO: Like the time I saw that guy put his gum under the table on Air Force One and I should have said something.
GUTFELD: Well, not like that.
PERINO: He was a celebrity.
GUTFELD: Yes but, I know, but my point is like if -- people will think that you are agreeing when you are just being polite.
GUILFOYLE: Yes. Right.
GUTFELD: So I think --
GUILFOYLE: Nevertheless, he is a very nice man. That was during the whole "Apprentice."
GUTFELD: Is he really nice?
GUILFOYLE: He is. He really is to be honest.
GUTFELD: I think he stole my style.
GUILFOYLE: OK.
GUTFELD: To be in that sweater? I don't like that.
BOLLING: See, this was first.
GUIFOYLE: Bolling, turkey of the year?
BOLLING: So how about a really, really good turkey of the year but it's all a bunch of turkeys. Watch.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIPS)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: -- he is to win the White House without Latinos. I don't think he can do it.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I talked to probably 12 Republican senators yesterday or their representatives. I couldn't find a single one who now thinks they're going to win.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: So Donald Trump will lose and he will then destroy the Republican Party.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: What's he over under on the Electoral College victory for Hillary Clinton?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I think she is trending over 400.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Trending over 400?
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes.
(END VIDEO CLIPS)
BOLLINHG: So that was all of them who said that Donald Trump couldn't win and he proved everyone wrong. Honestly, Steve Schmidt, I like him. I think he's one of the brighter political pundits out there but he just called that one wrong and Joe, you were on the right side for a while but you bailed. Sorry, brother.
GUTFELD: A lot of people bailed. But I will say this, when you are an underdog it's not necessarily being a turkey if you know it's an underdog. If you say he might probably lose, that's not -- that's different. A lot of people said that. Here as a matter of fact, a lot of people did.
WILLIAMS: All right, so my turkey -- this is a little bit sympathy turkey for me.
(CROSSTALK)
WILLIAMS: This woman had one of -- if Hillary Clinton had the worst year of any woman, this woman is right behind her. Take a look.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, I know.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
ANTHONY WEINER, FORMER NEW YORK CONGRESSMAN: A continuum of challenges in our marriage that ended at a certain point and we decided to move forward with our lives.
Well, my head is at try to sell this as something the people already know.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
WILLIAMS Huma, Huma, Huma girl. OK, so you talk about losing almost everything that matters to you in one year.
GUILFOYLE: Yes.
WILLIAMS: Her marriage fell apart and I guess I didn't realize this until doing research. Within a year of marriage, he was already sexting other women. It was just never at a good place. After six years of it, he resigns from congress, he derails his mayoral race in New York City and then still gets another investigation, which then leads to her political downfall. It's because when he was being investigated, her husband, by the FBI, that they were looking at his computer and on it they find more e-mails connected to Hillary Clinton.
GUILFOYLE: Yes.
GUTFELD: I want to make this point because I don't think I ever made this point before. Do you know who is responsible for the election of president Trump? Andrew Breitbart. Did we talk about this? Andrew Breitbart was the one with the first picture of Anthony Wiener. And then he was the one that got Anthony Wiener out. And then it comes all the way back five years later. It's about Anthony Wiener, his laptop being investigated. It all started with that one thing.
BOLLING: Well, it ended with the Breitbart.
GUTFELD: Yes. You now have Steve Bannon and it's the full circle.
GUILFOYLE: Is this like the "A-team." I like it when a plan comes together.
BOLLING: So you watch enough TV and listen to (inaudible). I really had a dislike for Huma Abedin because she's portrayed one way in the media. But if you watch that special, she's a brilliant woman and she was, you know, she was true to her man there. She tried to stick it out. She tried to be there for him. And I have a whole new respect for Huma Abedin after seeing that.
WILLIAMS: I'll say this. Somebody gave me some good advice about career. The most important business decision you make is a woman who you marry and even as a man, really starting to see that backfire for Huma.
GUTFELD: That's a very sexist comment.
WILLIAMS: I don't think so.
GUILFOYLE: That's nice.
BOLLING: Good thing we didn't say that. If I had said that, I would beon ice.
(CROSSTALK)
GUILFOYLE: Well, we got a lot more show ready to go Greg. You can make it.
GUTFELD: All right.
GUILFOYLE: All right, much more to come on our Thanksgiving Day special. Up next, president-elect Trump will be inaugurated in 57 days. This week, he laid out his agenda for his first 100 days in office. We're going to tell you what else we hope he might add when "The Five" returns. Stay with us.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
BOLLING: Before leaving for Florida to spend Thanksgiving with his family, the president-elect released a video outlining what he plans to tackle in his first 100 days as POTUS 45. Mr. Trump has a clear focus, jobs and the American economy will come first. Unleashing the vast energy sector will create jobs. Rolling back regulation creates jobs by freeing businesses to do more business.
Breaking trade agreements will bring manufacturing jobs home, and a trillion dollar infrastructure plan will certainly create American jobs. While I'm energized by the 100 day plan, some are wondering why repealing and replacing Obamacare and building the Mexican wall were not mentioned. So what do the fivers think of the president-elect's 100 day plan? KG, your thoughts --
GUILFOYLE: Yes.
BOLLING: OK, you're all right with the plan and what would you like to see added to the plan?
GUILFOYTLE: Well, I don't know. I mean it's pleasing me so far because I really like the focus. His emphasis on, you know, national security. I would like to see some more specifics regarding education, which I know he thinks is very important as well. I'm a big, you know, believer in early education for children in terms of getting them on the right foot and a path to success.
I enjoy some of the research and the experience I've had with charter schools and school choice. So, I hope that that is something that he also makes immediate time for, because no time to waste.
BOLLING: Dana, anything you would like to --
PERINO: Well, I don't understand the Obamacare thing because that was one of the things, especially in the closing two weeks of the campaign after the news came out that the rates were going to be going up, that he focused on. And I think that really helped him so I don't -- maybe it's just an oversight. I feel like everything is here. I'm for government doing less so I don't think I would add anything to this list. I mean, one of the things he said was about removing some of those regulations and if any additional ones are proposed, you have to eliminate two others. That will be a big fight within the government so that will be fun to watch, but one of the things that's most important is the Supreme Court announcement. That's here on the list. But also the government has to be -- we have to have a budget passed and budgeting is policy. So to me, a lot of that -- all of those answers will be probably known within the first three months of the administration.
BOLLING: All right Greg, you looking for the wall in the plan?
GUTFELD: I don't know. I think he might -- it could turn into a fence, but I'm just upset there's nothing in there about transgender bathrooms, nothing about pronouns. His normative -- is that what it is, pronouns, which I find offensive. It's remarkably devoid of any kind of identity politics and frankly I'm outraged by it.
BOLLING: You're not used to that, right.
WILLIAMS: That's sarcasm?
GUTFELD: Yes, it's sarcasm.
WILLIAMS: OK, great. That's awesome.
(CROSSTALK)
WILLIAMS: Just Double-checking. You never know the great Gutfeld. OK so, I was looking at his first 100 days and I actually don't think it's random that Obamacare repeal and replace nor the fence are in here. I think, you know, we're still pretty divided as a country. People are very, very excited by president-elect Trump and there are those who are still horrified by it.
So, I think it's smart of president-elect Trump to kind of start at places where there's mutual agreement. TPP -- everybody says at this point that is not a good idea for the American economy and that's a perfect place to start. Put in some infrastructure opportunities there. That's awesome. Also, this lobbying ban, where he's talking about implementing a ban that says after coming out of government service, you can't go be a lobbyist for five years. I think that's great.
I think that talks about draining the swamp and it's consistent with the message that no matter what side of the aisle you're on, you don't like people enriching themselves at the expense of government service.
BOLLING: So, what do you think? Do you think he is -- KG, do you think he's waiting around the Obamacare because he wants --
WILLIAMS: To earn some goodwill.
BOLLING: He wants to get a Supreme Court in place first and then maybe start working in that direction?
GUILFOYLE: Oh yes. I think this is 100 percent part of a strategy. And also keep in mind that it's something that, you know, President Obama does not want him to touch. I think that was part of, you know, the conversation that they initially had. He wants to at least leave part of it. He has already indicated two aspects but of course, that's something that the Republicans had agreed with already, you know, and being able to still be under your parent's insurance and pre-existing conditions and whatnot. So, I don't know. Let's see what happens. I mean this is quite an expensive list of things he intends to do. Some he needs congressional --
GUTFELD: He needs to invade a country.
GUILFOYLE: He doesn't.
GUILFOYLE: A small country. Just start small.
BOLLING: Dana, can I tell you about the infrastructure in the --
GUILFOYTLE: Or caliphate.
BOLLING: It's not the plan for the $1 trillion spending. It's a plan to shore up our infrastructure from cyber attacks. That's a big one.
PERINO: Well, yes, especially if you're Hillary Clinton, you're thinking that would be a good idea after all of WikiLeaks. But cyber security issues, actually my niece works on these issues for the House Commerce Committee and she's brilliant. She's only 25 years old. I can't understand a thing she's talking about.
She was telling me some of the daunting things that are coming our way and then just -- those are the things we know about and a lot we don't know about.
BOLLING: Can we talk about that? It's the attacks on the power grid. The alleged attacks on the power grids and the banking system.
PERINO: Yes, like I don't even want to say. The food supply.
BOLLING: Water supply.
PERINO: I mean there's a lot of things that could happen and maybe I've been watching too much television.
BOLLING: Or maybe he's getting some of the security briefings. This is --
GUTFELD: This is a big deal. It also goes through -- a long with technology marrying (ph) terror, which we've talked about here many times. You know, it hasn't been talked about on the campaign. He probably got information that said, this is happening, it's not just going to be a box cutter on a plane. There's going to be drones, anthrax. There's going to be hitting the grid and water supply and food. All of these things together. Also, you have to look at the other side of technology, automation. You got to start thinking about how you're going ll deal with -- you can't bring jobs back when robots take over.
PERINO: The other thing on cyber security is how do we react and how do we support our allies? So, when you look at NATO, one of the lines is or tenets is -- an attack on one is an attack on all. Do we extend that to cyber security? It might not be an attack on us but on one of our ally.
WILLIAMS: But we also know that Trump is very big on, you know, the American first mantra. And one thing I like about him when he talks about, you know, foreign affairs or international things, he really appreciates this notion of secrecy in a way and he values that and the leverage that that provides us to be safer and more protected. So I anticipate he will continue that mantra (ph).
BOLLING: Can I tell you one thing, Greg?
GUTFELD: Nope (ph).
BOLLING: West world is going to blow your mind in ways. You just need to see them all back to back. It's amazing.
GUTFELD: I'm planning on doing that a day in my boxers covered in mashed potatoes.
GUILFOYLE: Oh my God, I love mashed potatoes.
GUTFELD: Come on over.
BOLLING: The artificial intelligence has Greg's world spinning in a different direction.
GUTFELD: Yes.
BOLLING: Ahead, this election divided a lot of family and friends with tensions playing out on social media, political rants on Facebook or Twitter. Can online friendships be saved now that the vote is over? We will discuss that when "The Five" returns.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
DOUG MCKELWAY, WASHINGTON-BASED CORRESPONDENT, FOX NEWS: This is a Fox News Alert. I'm Doug McKelway in Washington. The Pentagon says an American service member has died in Syria. It happened when an improvised explosive device went off about an hour north of the ISIS de facto capital of Raqqah. It is believed to be the first U.S. Service death in Syria since the start of the war.
We are waiting to hear more from the president-elect about who will be working in his administration. Yesterday, Donald Trump named South Carolina governor Nikki Haley as U.N. Ambassador and long time Republican activist Betsy Devos as education secretary. President Obama is running out of time to fulfill his promise to close the terrorist prison camp at Guantanamo Bay. We will look at what his options are in his final days in office.
And a massive fire is forcing tens of thousands of people from their homes in northern Israel. I'm Doug McKelway in Washington. Join me tonight at 6:00 for "Special Report." Now back to a special edition of "The Five."
BOLLING: That's Dierks Bentley and Greg Gutfeld singing a duet. So, a lot of people are giving thanks this holiday that the election is over. But if you are on social media, it may not feel like it's over. It's hard to escape the political storm online. Friends or family members who might still be venting about the outcome or others shaming you for backing the president-elect or not.
The question is, should you cut back on your social media use to stay sane or maybe cut some of those people off? Time for a post-election social media cleanse. I know somebody Greg who deleted Facebook -- they deleted their Facebook account so they couldn't take it anymore.
GUTFELD: Well, they just ripped their face off. You know, this has happened to my sister and her husband. They have good friends that are Democrats. My in-laws they never speak -- are they in-laws, what do you call those? Sister -- are those in-laws?
PERINO: Yes.
GUTFELD: OK. Anyway, they don't talk politics. The Democrats kept talking to them. And then when Trump won, now it's like shut up I don't want to hear about it. They don't want to talk about it. They're very angry. They call them in the middle of the night screaming at them because they weren't ready for any kind of disagreement. You've had eight years of everybody agreeing with each other, watching "The Daily Show" and "The Colbert Report." Everybody thought everybody felt the same way.
PERINO: But before social media, Kimberly, most people didn't know how anybody else thought. Unless your neighbor put a sign in their front yard or a bumper sticker, you probably wouldn't have known.
GUILFOYLE: Or until you gathered around the Thanksgiving Day table with your relatives and you heard from them all.
PERINO: You have a healthy attitude about social media.
GUTFELD: You're not even on it.
GUILFOYLE: I am on it. I have a tremendous social media presence.
PERINO: She is.
GUTFELD: Yes, but you're never there.
GUILFOYLE: I do nothing to deserve it.
PERINO: You don't let any negativity affect you.
GUILFOYLE: No. I really don't.
PERINO: I know.
GUILFOYLE: I just go, too bad for you.
GUTFELD: Yes.
GUILFOYLE: I like that this (inaudible) it just doesn't bother me. I don't know why but it just doesn't matter. I'm, you know, I'm a nice person. I post my stuff. You don't like it, you know, blow yourself up on the inside about it because I'm happy.
PERINO: I had someone tell me that she and her husband were not speaking because of the election and I thought, OK, that's a little bit too much.
WILLIAMS: It's too much, right? I mean my mother hung up the phone on me a couple times during this election if I said something that wasn't the most flattering to president-elect Trump. But look, you know, w got to be adults, you know. We've got to be able to have that type of discord you're talking about Greg, and be OK and move on and be happy. If KG is -- even when people don't agree with us, but the fact that we can't, the fact that the answer becomes delete your page, unfriend people, I think it's telling us just how far away we are from the goal of just having respectful discourse on this.
PERINO: I kind of admire people that walk away from social media, though. I kind of have that fantasy.
WILLIAMS: Is it for a good reason? Or are they just like, "Oh, I don't like what you said, so delete"?
PERINO: I just like to see what's going on. That's why.
WILLIAMS: Voyeur.
PERINO: What about you?
BOLLING: I lost a lot of friends on social media. Mostly -- there's a difference between Facebook and Twitter.
PERINO: Yes, there is.
BOLLING: The Facebook people tend to stick around. The Twitter people for some reason -- they would be angry, because I was a Trump -- I like Trump, and they couldn't believe it. A lot of the Cruz people say, "I can't stand you. They'd leave." And then -- but the Facebook was pretty solid.
GUTFELD: They also have their names. The Facebook people have their names there, so they're more...
BOLLING: More likely to show what they really -- can I tell you one more phenomenon I've noticed since Trump is president-elect? Before who before would say, "I kind of like Trump," and they'd whisper...
PERINO: Now they'll tell you. Yes, yes, yes.
BOLLING: ... now they talk about it in the restaurant. "I love him. I told you."
PERINO: "I always liked him." Right, right. I had somebody, an author at a Miami book fair tell me that last weekend. He's an openly gay writer. He has written a book. And he's like "I was always for Trump." But I don't think he was, like, out there talking about Trump.
WILLIAMS: Or he was whispering it prior.
PERINO: Yes.
GUTFELD: Came out of the closet.
PERINO: The other thing...
BOLLING: Came out of the Trump closet.
GUTFELD: He came out of the Trump closet.
PERINO: You know, the other thing that's happened since the election ended...
GUILFOYLE: Is it a gold closet?
PERINO: That the fake Twitter accounts have ended. Like the ones that were being generated out of Macedonia attacking people, that's almost gone.
GUTFELD: Yes. I kind of miss them.
PERINO: Do you?
GUTFELD: Yes.
PERINO: We could arrange for them to come back and get you.
GUTFELD: A swarm of obnoxious bees that land in the morning.
GUILFOYLE: I know.
PERINO: There was somebody here who said that -- that they have lost their positive feelings for someone they have known longest and cherished the most.
BOLLING: Over the election?
PERINO: Over the election.
GUTFELD: That was Lou, Lou Dobbs.
PERINO: Maybe it's just too soon. Maybe everybody just needs to get through the holidays.
GUTFELD: Dobbs won't even call me anymore. Lou used to check on me, say, "Greg, how are things going?" Not anymore. What happened, Lou?
WILLIAMS: Here's the other thing: So many people, myself included were like, "I can't wait for this to be over, right, so we can move on." The thing, it doesn't seem like people are really trying to move on.
PERINO: No.
WILLIAMS: Some people that are really upset or whatever, like, you're still talking about it and rehashing it. Let's just enjoy turkey day.
GUILFOYLE: I agree.
PERINO: You have the best ideas. And also, Eboni, I love it that your Mom is sort of, like, a partial co-host whenever you're here. It is fun to get her input.
GUILFOYLE: Her Mom picks the winners, let me tell you.
GUTFELD (HOLDING UP A WHITE PUMPKIN): Look, it's an -- it's an alt-right pumpkin.
PERINO: OK. Very funny.
All right. We certainly hope you'll stay friends with us on social media, because we enjoy you.
Next, we answer some questions you posted on our Facebook page about our Thanksgiving traditions and more. Stay right there.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
GUTFELD: Welcome back. We've got a stack here of Thanksgiving feast questions posted on our Facebook page. Let's begin.
Hey, you know what? Kimberly, this is from Rory: "What is your favorite Thanksgiving memory as a child?"
GUILFOYLE: The one where everyone was alive.
GUTFELD: That is beautiful. I hear you.
PERINO: Can we explain why we're laughing?
GUTFELD: That is so beautiful.
Oh, Dana...
PERINO: Yes.
GUTFELD: ... you had many fond Thanksgiving memories, I'm sure.
PERINO: Yes, I did. We used to go up to Wyoming. And I do remember one year, although I can't remember if it was Thanksgiving or Christmas, we -- it was a blizzard.
GUTFELD: Yes.
PERINO: And we had to all stay inside and we had to go take care of the animals in the morning. But then the rest of the day, we set up card tables all throughout my Grandpa and Grandma's house, and we played cards. And then you would compete.
And I really didn't know how to play, but I learned how to play. We were playing Spades.
GUTFELD: Playing Spades? Great game. I played Hearts. Those were the days. Yes.
Eric, fond memories as a child?
BOLLING: As a child? Or a Thanksgiving memory?
GUTFELD: Thanksgiving memory.
BOLLING: The one time where there was one of our liberal co-hosts who grabbed...
GUILFOYLE: It's a Thanksgiving show.
BOLLING: Well, Thanksgiving, but not as a child. It was a few years ago when this...
WILLIAMS: Grown man?
BOLLING: ... when this co-host was grabbing the turkey, pulling pieces of the turkey off, eating it, and we realized that he had, like, MRSA on his hand.
GUTFELD: Yes. It wasn't a good thing.
BOLLING: Then we gave the turkey away to the crew afterwards.
GUTFELD: Yes.
PERINO: No. We wouldn't.
GUILFOYLE: We did.
WILLIAMS: That's funny.
GUTFELD: Eboni, do you have any fond memories with your parents on Thanksgiving?
WILLIAMS: Greg, you're terrible. No, it was always just me and Mom.
GUTFELD: Oh, OK.
WILLIAMS: So -- so mine is from an adult. You're terrible, Greg. So I was in Los Angeles for about five years. We would do friends-giving.
GUTFELD: Right.
WILLIAMS: I wasn't...
GUTFELD: Friends-giving.
WILLIAMS: I wasn't a trained cook growing up. My Mom didn't teach me those skills, so I learned as an adult. So that's how I got my cooking chops.
GUTFELD: Wow.
GUILFOYLE: Very nice.
PERINO: Your Mom was probably very busy.
WILLIAMS: She did semi-homemade.
PERINO: Yes.
WILLIAMS: So she did, you know, the Stovetop stuffing.
PERINO: I love that. That's actually the best.
WILLIAMS: She would, like, buy a turkey and put a little extra oregano on top, you know, kind of fake it out a little bit.
GUTFELD: My favorite memory was how adults would act strange, and you didn't know why when you were a child.
WILLIAMS: Yes.
GUTFELD: Because you hadn't discovered what alcohol was. "Why is Mommy so happy right now? Why did -- why did Uncle Bill fall into the tree?"
PERINO: I thought my dad drank Scope, but it was creme de menthe.
GUILFOYLE: My gosh. A lot of dysfunction. I'm feeling so much better already.
I have a funny Thanksgiving.
GUTFELD: What?
GUILFOYLE: Well, it was the time I tried to cook.
GUTFELD: Yes.
GUILFOYLE: And I didn't know it was that difficult. So I tried to cook the turkey. And I cooked it upside down with the plastic inside. And it was still partially frozen. So I have given that up.
GUTFELD: Wow.
WILLIAMS: Order out, K.G.
GUTFELD: Yes. Exactly.
GUILFOYLE: I'm going to a restaurant this year.
GUTFELD: You know what's a great place to have Thanksgiving? Boston Market.
PERINO: You can have it every day.
BOLLING: We go out to dinner every -- probably the last ten Thanksgivings in a row. We haven't had it at home.
GUTFELD: Yes. It's a good thing.
BOLLING: I'm a big fan of not cleaning up for four hours.
WILLIAMS: Yes. We fed -- my girlfriend and I fed the homeless the morning. And then we went to Del Frisco's and toasted it up.
GUILFOYLE: Yes, I'm going to a steakhouse, too.
GUTFELD: I'm -- I do Chinese food.
PERINO: I'm crashing a friend's house, apartment.
GUTFELD: Excellent.
GUILFOYLE: Remember the time that you invited and then disinvited Greg?
PERINO: That was last year. Last year. Same people.
GUTFELD: Unbelievable.
GUILFOYLE: You remember that?
GUTFELD: Yes, I do. She said -- she goes, "Oh, no" -- what did you say? "Never mind."
PERINO: It was even worse than that.
GUTFELD: It was pretty bad. She finds it funny. She invited me.
GUILFOYLE: Remember? And then you canceled it.
GUTFELD: Well, this is from Patty B. "What do you do after you eat your Thanksgiving dinner, Kimberly?" And give us every gory detail.
GUILFOYLE: Well, gravy and -- no, let's see. So I have seconds. Yes, because you know me. Get back in the line. And then also, I probably -- most years, like, I kind of maybe want to, like, lay down a little bit, take a little nap. Like, the tryptophan in the turkey. So yes, let's see.
WILLIAMS: Most years for me, this is the time to debut eggnog for the season.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, really?
WILLIAMS: I'm a big eggnog fan. Everybody is not into that.
GUILFOYLE: Like, do you make it?
WILLIAMS: We make a special recipe. It's like rum, fresh nutmeg.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, Puerto Ricans. Like that. Num.
WILLIAMS: There you go. So yes, that's my debut for the season.
BOLLING: Restaurant Thanksgiving so everyone can drink. So you just Uber home and don't worry about the...
GUILFOYLE: And then what do you do after? You just, like, go to bed?
BOLLING: Football.
PERINO: Football.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, well, football, yes, yes, yes. You can watch football always. We got that coming up.
GUTFELD: What do you...
PERINO: I always have calorie guilt, so I go for a walk with the dog.
GUTFELD: That's nice.
WILLIAMS: Even on Thanksgiving?
PERINO: Yes. No, this is a problem. It's always.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my God.
PERINO: Eric and I share that in common.
GUTFELD: I'll eat it.
PERINO: Calorie guilt.
GUTFELD: I'll just usually just throw up.
This is from Brittany: "If you could invite one politician, past or present..." I know.
BOLLING: Haven't we done this before?
GUTFELD: We might have.
PERINO: Six years in a row.
BOLLING: Have we done this every year?
GUTFELD: Let's pretend.
GUILFOYLE: It's not Groundhog Day. It's Thanksgiving.
GUTFELD: You want to skip that one?
PERINO: OK. Sure.
GUTFELD: No, because the next one is even worse.
All right. "Do you have any Thanksgiving traditions?" Come on, guys.
PERINO: Eating turkey and cranberries. I like the Macy's Day parade.
GUTFELD: There you go.
PERINO: I love the Macy's Day parade. I'm going -- she's (ph) going.
BOLLING: I will go with that, too.
GUTFELD: Yes, you like that?
WILLIAMS: I will do Black Friday shopping.
PERINO: Yes. Online now.
GUTFELD: Why does it have to be called black?
WILLIAMS: I can't believe you.
PERINO: We don't know.
GUTFELD: No, no. It's racist. It is just racist. Call it white Friday. Although then that would be...
GUILFOYLE: Then what would happen?
PERINO: That would be racist.
GUTFELD: Pink Friday.
GUILFOYLE: Right.
WILLIAMS: Multicultural Friday.
GUTFELD: There -- Rainbow Friday.
PERINO: It's better than Red Friday, because that means you're not making any money.
GUILFOYLE: Blue Friday. Like blue like the blue light special at Kmart when they run the little light and you got the specials.
PERINO: Is this the show where we get fired?
GUTFELD: No. We're doing great.
GUILFOYLE: That's next.
GUTFELD: K.G., what -- do you have any traditions?
GUILFOYLE: No. This is not a pleasant day for me.
GUTFELD: No, it's not.
PERINO: It's a tough day.
WILLIAMS: I love you, K.G.
GUTFELD: Aww.
GUILFOYLE: Thank you. Very sweet.
GUTFELD: My tradition is we have -- we play a little football.
WILLIAMS: Yes? Throw the football around?
BOLLING: You and Dobbs?
GUTFELD: Me and Dobbs. We throw that pigskin around.
GUILFOYLE: At all the Thanksgivings you get invited to.
GUTFELD: Yes, yes, it's me and Dobbs. We just pass it around.
BOLLING: In the street? Right?
GUTFELD: Yes, in the street. And Hemmer, whenever he wakes up. He'll come out in his bathrobe. The shorty one. And then we just -- you know, we play a little ball. Then, like, whatever happens next, you'll never know.
Up next, another "Five" Thanksgiving tradition. Our bets on the big football games tonight. Stay tuned.
GUILFOYLE: It's good. You ruined...
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
WILLIAMS: So no Thanksgiving is complete without a little football. The Vikings went up against the Lions earlier today. So we want to place our annual bets on some of the big games tonight.
First up, the Redskins are up against the Cowboys, the Steelers versus the Colts. Want to take it around the table -- Greg.
GUTFELD: Not me. I should go last. Because I don't know anything.
PERINO: OK, let me go to somebody who knows about football -- Eric Bolling.
BOLLING: OK. First game, I love the Cowboys.
GUILFOYLE: Yes.
BOLLING: Dak Prescott is crushing it. Cousins, I get it. I understand he's a good ballplayer, good quarterback. But you've got to go with the home team.
WILLIAMS: You like that?
BOLLING: I do. I love that one.
And then this one, I've loved the Steelers all year, but you -- for some reason, you don't bet against the Colts at home on a holiday. They always come through. They're the underdog, but I think they win.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my goodness. Goodness gracious. Oh, holla. Dallas by seven, baby. And I love a good defense. Well, I like a good offense, too. But anyway, Steelers by three, Bolling. I'm going to go against you on that one.
BOLLING: You got it.
GUILFOYLE: I like your stats about, you know, the Colts. Tough team for sure. But I'm going with a little bit of Steelers action, baby.
WILLIAMS: Dana Perino.
PERINO: Well, you might not know, Eboni, but I have Dana's mascot theory. So I need to show you some -- I actually brought problems this year. Of course, we have FiveFanPhotoshop who helps me, with the Cowboys and the Redskins.
So an interesting thing. Guess what? The Redskins are one of four NFL teams that does not have an official mascot. Did you know that?
BOLLING: Uh-oh.
PERINO: So the Cowboys win this by default.
GUTFELD: Well, what would the Redskins be?
PERINO: I'm just saying, that means -- if you go by mascot theory...
BOLLING: Hold on. Time out, time out. Native American mascots are not unusual.
GUILFOYLE: Wait. It's right there on the helmet.
BOLLING: It's on the helmet. But it's also Florida State.
PERINO: Right. But they don't -- you want to know the other -- you want to know the other three teams that do not have an actual mascot?
GUTFELD: Yes, I do.
PERINO: I'm told Jets, Packers and Giants.
GUTFELD: Jetsetters.
PERINO: Like, an official mascot. Interesting, right?
BOLLING: Who told you that?
GUILFOYLE: I'm so sorry.
PERINO: The Internet.
GUILFOYLE: Who's winning here?
PERINO: And then the Steelers mascot, I think, large steel beam. A very effective against Colts. But Tony Fratto and Chuck Blahous are from Pittsburgh, so I've got to go with them.
BOLLING: There you go.
WILLIAMS: OK. Greg, are you ready now?
GUTFELD: Well, an interesting thing. This is the first time that all the teams that are playing have a record of .500 or better in over 81 years. I read that somewhere.
PERINO: On the Internet?
GUTFELD: ... 6 p.m. ...
GUILFOYLE: Did Kilmeade give you that?
GUTFELD: Yes, he did.
Six p.m. Saturday, November 26, "Love Actually" is on.
BOLLING: Get out of here.
GUTFELD: Yes.
PERINO: Come on!
GUTFELD: Six p.m. Saturday, November -- the worst Christmas movie ever.
PERINO: Best movie. Best.
GUILFOYLE: The best.
GUTFELD: The worst Christmas...
GUILFOYLE: No. Gutfeld. It's shorty robe time.
GUTFELD: You know, it stated that thing when people used to -- remember that thing, when he was trying to -- and he writes the -- then that showed up in every movie, in every video.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my God.
GUTFELD: I hate that.
GUILFOYLE: And now you're going to get so annoyed. And now it's going to be in your head again. And now you're going to, like, talk about it all the time.
GUTFELD: I have to. I've got to stop people from watching this film. Don't make it a Christmas film.
BOLLING: Check that out. Cowboys versus the Indians. Redskins? No?
WILLIAMS: No.
So I'm going to go with the Cowboys for sure. Mainly because you just said that, E. Just kidding. No, I really like this new quarterback. And I think...
BOLLING: He's good. He's the real deal.
WILLIAMS: Yes, he's killing the game. I think this has just been, like, a spectacular year for him.
GUILFOYLE: I even did the points. Come on.
BOLLING: Can I throw something in there very quickly? You know who is one of the classiest humans on the planet? Tony Romo.
WILLIAMS: Sure.
BOLLING: When he said...
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my God. Amazing.
BOLLING: ... football is a meritocracy.
WILLIAMS: yes.
BOLLING: Dak Prescott is winning. He started putting the numbers up, and he stepped aside gracefully. That was amazing. You've got to love him.
GUILFOYLE: He's a class act. And his wife is absolutely lovey, super sweet. They always are a guest for the White House Press Corps benefit.
WILLIAMS: She's gorgeous.
GUTFELD: I love the ribs.
WILLIAMS: She's stunning.
And then I'm going to go with the Steelers on the other game.
But no, you're right about that, Eric. Romo was fantastic. But also, it's showing team first, which is really how this league...
PERINO: Can I ask, who here has had time to watch football this year?
BOLLING: Nonstop. Nonstop.
WILLIAMS: I watched it.
PERINO: I missed it all.
BOLLING: Nonstop.
PERINO: I missed it all, thanks to Stirewalt.
WILLIAMS: My team is not doing well, so I miss it. Oops, my bad.
"One More Thing" is up next.
GUILFOYLE: Aww. I know you love them.
(COMMERCIAL BREAK)
GUILFOYLE: All right. It's time for "One More Thing." And I'll kick it off on this Thanksgiving. I am thankful for teachers. And so are some other people out there. One family in particular.
And a loyal viewer of our program, Shari (ph), just shared a story about a teacher who saved the life of another student during class last week. Take a look at Leesha Rowe (ph). She is a language arts teacher in Texas. She sprang into action when she noticed a girl in her class choking on a piece of candy while having a seizure. She performed the Heimlich maneuver and a saved the girl's life.
PERINO: Wow.
WILLIAMS: Amazing.
GUILFOYLE: Such an incredible story, and I love that they reached out to me to put this on here.
PERINO: Excellent.
GUILFOYLE: So the unsung heroes. And also a good point for everyone to learn CPR.
GUTFELD: Especially on Thanksgiving. Right, Kimberly?
GUILFOYLE: Yes. Very uplifting holiday. Eric.
BOLLING: Obviously, I'm very, very fortunate and thankful for my family and my beautiful wife, Adrienne, and my son, who's home from college for the first time. He came back. It's great to have Eric Chase back. This is the time of year we say thanks to the people who help us.
We'll be eating dinner, we'll be spending time with some friends and our family. Law enforcement, they're -- some of whom will be home, some of them will be working. But they're always on call 24/7 and putting their lives on the line.
And also the military. If it weren't for the military, and protecting our freedoms, we wouldn't have the abundance of riches that we do have. So thanks to law enforcement and thanks to the military.
GUILFOYLE: Very nice. God bless them.
Yes, Dana.
PERINO: Well, I have one about a turkey who thinks it is a dog. Now, this is the ultimate way to survive Thanksgiving if you are a turkey. There's a California animal sanctuary. And this turkey named Leon came in and all of a sudden he started, like -- actually, he likes to sit next to people. He wants to roll over and get bully rubs. He responds to all these people taking care of him. So thought he was worth a shout-out on "One More Thing."
GUTFELD: It's not a turkey.
PERINO: What do you think it is?
GUTFELD: Just a creepy little old dude.
PERINO: Like a dog in a turkey suit? But this is actually -- like, they're smart. Human beings, they don't eat dogs. Not in America. Hopefully.
GUTFELD: I don't know.
GUILFOYLE: Remember, Greg?
GUTFELD: Yes. That one weekend.
GUILFOYLE: Remember
GUTFELD: Yes. You said you'd never bring it up.
PERINO: Speaking of dogs, if you want to be here tomorrow, we're actually live tomorrow, Friday. And there's going to be a package about Jasper for the "Let Me Tell You About Jasper" book, and it's pretty cute. You're going to see something you haven't seen before.
GUTFELD: Your dog?
PERINO: He'll be home. You'll see him in a very strange position, Greg.
GUTFELD: Oh, jeez. This is a family show.
GUILFOYLE: Probably very familiar position for Greg.
And yes. Your turn.
GUTFELD: All right. Let's just do something.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Greg's Secrets to Happiness.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: You know, the great thing about Thanksgiving is you spend all that time eating together. But you know what's even funner afterwards? Napping together.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
(PANDAS CUDDLING)
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: Like these two family members after they had a large Thanksgiving meal. They were obviously ate too much. Had a little too much gravy and cranberry sauce. So they ended up...
PERINO: They're stuffed.
GUTFELD: They were stuffed, so they're just lying around. What happens next, we can't show you. But...
GUILFOYLE: I could tell.
GUTFELD: Yes. One thing led to another. And it became kind of a sick affair. It was terrible.
GUILFOYLE: Oh, my gosh.
GUTFELD: We actually had to have them arrested.
GUILFOYLE: Wow.
WILLIAMS: OK, so back to family.
GUILFOYLE: Not too sure.
Not too sure what happened there.
BOLLING: They were family members, weren't they?
GUTFELD: Well, loose family. In pandas, it doesn't matter. It's whoever's nearby.
BOLLING: By marriage.
GUTFELD: Yes.
GUILFOYLE: Like pandas in the attic?
GUTFELD: Yes.
GUILFOYLE: "Flowers in the Attic."
WILLIAMS: So something I'm very grateful and thankful for is healing. So I had the good fortune of spending the past weekend in Charleston, South Carolina. And one thing that I was able to do was visit the Mother Emanuel AME Church where the Charleston massacre unfortunately took place.
And, you know, just the sentiment there of the spirit of a congregation, so beautiful. Full of so much healing. There I am pictured with three fantastic ushers from the church. And I must have stood outside and talked to those wonderful, sweet gentlemen for about an hour. That's Usher Albert Rallston; That's usher Albert Allston, Wolford Simmons and Reuben Nelson.
And they were just -- you guys, it's so full of life, so full of love, so full of forgiveness.
GUILFOYLE: God bless.
WILLIAMS: There's a new pastor there, and I wish them the best.
GUILFOYLE: Yes, awesome.
BOLLING: They forgave immediately.
GUILFOYLE: Set your DVR so you never miss an episode of "the five." That's it for us. Have a very happy Thanksgiving, everyone. We'll see you back here tomorrow. "Special Report" next.
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