'The Five' remembers Charles Krauthammer

This is a rush transcript from "The Five," June 22, 2018. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

JUAN WILLIAMS, CO-HOST: Hello, everyone. I'm Juan Williams along with Candace Owens, Jesse Watters, Kennedy, and Greg Gutfeld. It's 5 o'clock in New York City, and this is "The Five."

Lots of breaking news to cover on the immigration battle in D.C., President Trump holding an event with angel families. You'll recall they are Americans who have lost relatives to crimes committed by people in the country illegally. Take a listen.


DONALD TRUMP, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA: We call these brave Americans the angel families. Angel moms, angel pops. These are the angel families. Your loss will not have been in vain. We will secure our borders.


WILLIAMS: Much more on that later in the show. But, first, we want to remember a legend and a friend, Dr. Charles Krauthammer who passed away yesterday at the age of 68 after a battle with cancer.


CHARLES KRAUTHAMMER, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: The biggest error that we make is to lose the damn war because we refuse to recognize who the enemy is and what it requires. For God's sake why do you have to talk about that? The mourning is over, the chiva is done. And if you're a conservative you should be optimistic. I think, you know, it will snow in hell before the DOJ is going to go after her. We all were expecting it. It didn't happen. That was the dog that didn't bark.


WILLIAMS: Charles is the leading conservative thinker of his generation to many. He touched so many of our lives right here at the Fox News Channel. I've got to tell you, I often found myself on the opposite end of the opinion fence from Charles Krauthammer. That was the case for just about a decade on Special Report. Charles was also, like me, a huge baseball fan. And last night, Charles was honored at Nationals Park in D.C. So, you know, people outside of Fox ask me about Charles. I think it's very hard sometimes to explain to them how he touched so many of us because, I think, oh, how could all you guys know him? But Jesse had a very special relationship. Jesse, explain.

JESSE WATTERS, CO-HOST: Well, I was the producer for "the O'Reilly Factor" for many years and it was my great honor to produce Charles Krauthammer for about five of those years. So, once a week, I would get on the phone with Dr. Krauthammer and I would transcribe his talking points about Bill's topics for that night. And then, I would absorb the talking points and I will go to the bar later and repeat them as if they were my own to sound smart. And I loved doing it. And I also remember for years I would DVR Special Report, and then I would fast forward to the all-star panel at the end, fast forward through you, no offense. And then I would just listen to Charles. And what the difference with Charles compared to any other commentator when he spoke, everything went quiet and you listened. And you never interrupted Charles. Not even O'Reilly interrupted Charles. And that's a pretty tall order. Even my liberal mother liked Charles Krauthammer because he had a way about him. He was so rational and so respectful. He was never disagreeable.

And you could always kind of as a liberal disagree with him but not hate him, and he was never ever attacked if you ever realized from the left. And it shows the kind of the depth of his power because he was honored by George W. Bush, the nationals, Benjamin Netanyahu. I had friends texting me randomly, I'm so sorry to hear about Charles. He really had such a great impact. I remember the first time I met him face to face. I was in the D.C. bureau and I just come back from one of those crazy Watters' World and I was all cocky and I rolled into the green room and Charles in that kind of low tone says, Jesse, thank you so much for allowing me to be in your world. And he said it with a wink and a smile. It just really made me laugh.

WILLIAMS: So, Kennedy, we were in the green room and you said something about what Charles meant to you that really caught me by surprise. I was taken by it. It was wonderful.

KENNEDY, CO-HOST: Well, there's something so incredibly positive about what he did, which was he opened a window of mourning and let people in on the knowledge that he did not have long left in this world. And there's something so sweet and honorable about that because if you think about it, the only time we really talk about people in these glowing terms is after they pass. If you actually allow someone in to the end of your life, so they can celebrate you, and let you know what you've meant to them while you're still living, that is so incredibly profound, and it is such an amazing gift that very few people are capable of giving so many people and he was able to do that.

He had the confidence and he had enough respect for himself, his audience, and his very close friends and colleagues here at Fox. And I think we will be forever grateful for that. Not only for so many people having the opportunity to reach out to him, but also as an example to other people that you can take this on with a degree of positivity and comportment that we rarely see. And I hope people see that as an example. And they're not ashamed of passing on to the next realm because, you know, as people of faith, and there are a lot of people of faith here, we embrace the afterlife but we're terrified of dying. And there was such bravery and strength that Charles showed going into that.

WILLIAMS: You know, I always thought and the reason your words touched me is I always thought the idea that someone who was paralyzed and living in a wheelchair, for him to do just what we do to come and be commentators on television, to write a column, boy, he was terrific about it. He never was self-pitying. Greg?

GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: No, I mean, that's -- he had to face something every day that was beyond his own disability. It was people that he met that weren't aware that he was disabled until they met him. And because he always -- when he was shot at Fox, you know, you couldn't tell that he was in a wheelchair, and I think that was his choice because he didn't want to be -- he didn't want that as any kind of interference. And so, when you meet him maybe you didn't know. And I remember one of my -- one of my buddies made a joke about should Charles go on Dancing with the Stars. And I said you were such an A-hole, and he had no idea. He's a huge fan of Charles after Tucker was on. He had no idea that Charles Krauthammer was in a wheelchair.

You know, he's a very serious dude. He's very funny. But the one thing that was interesting about him is that he never let this -- whatever happened to him in his life actually affect him. And in a weird way it turned into an asset for him because it made him a man of ideas because he was limited -- he was in a chair for his entire life and he made his achievement come from here.

Everything was about ideas. And the other thing I would just mention is that we do live in a time where more people are healthy and they live longer, there's less disease, there's less poverty, but we have this -- we have an increase in suicides. We see people that are dealing with inner demons. And I think that's why he's so inspirational is because he has every excuse to hate life. Every excuse. Did the opposite. He embraced it. I don't think I could be that man. I honestly do not think I could be
10 percent of Charles Krauthammer.

WILLIAMS: That's the definition of courage, I think, when people stand up in the midst of dire circumstances. Candace, what do you think?

CANDANCE OWENS, CO-HOST: Exactly everything that you guys said here. Despite his disability he will be remembered as a man of great fortitude. You know, his character, his strength, his virtue. People from both sides of the political aisle coming together and honoring this man show you that he was a person of tremendous character. And, look, he was happy with his life. I think that that's the most wonderful thing. The wonderful take away here is how happy and content he was with the life that he lived.

WILLIAMS: Well, you know, interesting for me because I knew him for so long. I knew him before Fox even. And I'll say two things about Charles. One is that the sense of spirit and human kindness that came from Charles Krauthammer was no pretend. You know, you introduce him to people at Fox and they will be like, oh, Charles Krauthammer. And he would be like cracking jokes and open with so many folks, just very warm.

And, by the way, Jesse, going to a baseball game with Charles was, literally, people coming up to him because he gave structure to so much conservative thought. A lot of conservatives felt, hey, this is the guy. This is the intellectual that is able to frame conservative thought in such a way that the liberals and the left has trouble with it. That they finally feel that here is an intellectual of the right. Some people call them neo conservatives. But it was Charles who talked about the Reagan doctrine in terms of America globally standing up for freedom, for security. He talked about a Bush doctrine in terms of going in to war. He gave the framework.

And going to baseball, Jesse, with him, not only did you see the people were thanking him, conservatives thanking him for doing that. But you learn that the learners who own the Washington Nationals love Charles. So, here we are, you know, you go in Charles -- specially made van going down South Capitol Street and here we are -- I want you to take a look at that picture again, that's Charles on the big screen over the stadium last night as the Nats were playing the Orioles, and there was a moment of silence. But if you drove then and you think, oh, my God, is this guy going to crash this van? But you get to Nationals Park and he had the best parking spot, Jesse, because the learners had a parking spot for him in the stadium. And I always thought, gee, how come I can't get this.

GUTFELD: Jesse now wants to find out actually -- get a van.

WATTERS: And I know a few people that have driven with Charles, and it was probably one of the most frightening thing --


GUTFELD: Wait, wait, Charles is driving?

WATTERS: He drives.

GUTFELD: I don't think people are aware of that.

WILLIAMS: Oh, yes.

GUTFELD: Like when you're saying a van the assumption is that maybe somebody is driving.

WILLIAMS: No, no, no.

GUTFELD: He's driving it.

WATTERS: Specially equipped van.


WATTERS: Specially equipped van. And I used to joke -- I think it was before that, you know, the most expensive car in the Fox parking lot didn't belong to Bret, or Brit Hume, or anybody, it belonged to Charles Krauthammer.

WATTERS: There you go.

WILLIAMS: Kennedy, though, you really think he was a man of personification of courage in America.

KENNEDY: Yes, absolutely, and what an incredible example. And I do hope that in addition to some of the writing and the philosophy that he envied in his writing people also take away the incredible lesson at the end of his life and internalize that for their own in the future.

WILLIAMS: That's so sweet. Thank you, Kennedy. For more on the incredible life and legacy of Charles, please tune in tonight for a Fox News report, Charles Krauthammer, in his words, at 9 PM Eastern. The latest on immigration next on The Five.


WATTERS: Immigration battle heating up in Washington as liberal and media talking point crumble before our eyes. It turns out the crying 2-year-old migrant girl featured on the cover of Time Magazine wasn't actually separated from her mother according to the father. Meanwhile, President Trump holding an event with angel families whose loved ones were killed by illegal immigrants.


DONALD TRUMP, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA: We're gathered today to hear directly from the American victims of illegal immigration. You know, you hear the other side. You never hear this side. These are the American citizens permanently separated from their loved ones. These are permanently separated because they were killed by criminal illegal aliens. These are the families the media ignores. These are the stories that Democrats and people that are weak on immigration they don't want to discuss.


WATTERS: And extreme rhetoric from the left continues. Actress and current candidate for governor of New York, Cynthia Nixon, has some harsh words for ICE.


CYNTHIA NIXON, ACTRESS: ICE has strayed so far from its mission. It's supposed to be here to keep Americans safe, but what it's turned into is, frankly, a terrorist organization of its own. That is terrorizing people who are coming to this country.


WATTERS: Well, we'll get to that in a minute, Greg. But this 2-year-old migrant girl who was featured by the media for about a week as the standard bearer of a child separated from her mother was not actually separated from the mother. The mother took the child away from the father, away from other children in Central America, not any asylum reason but just to have a better economic life. Brought her here, was never separated at all. And, all of a sudden, Time Magazine is defending this and they're OK with that.

GUTFELD: They actually believe that if you attack them for being dishonest that you're politicizing it.


GUTFELD: I saw that defense is like, yeah, yeah, we lied but how dare you accuse us of lying. You're just making this into a political event. They tried to create a poster child for hate. This is all about demonization. The confirmation bias has steered the media into lying over and over again which is why no one trusts them. And why Time is now thinner than Donnie Deutsch's spine. I want to bring up Donnie Deutsch because we didn't mention him in here, but he said that all Trump supporters are no different than Nazi prison guards if you support him on immigration.

So now, he's deemed everybody evil. You have to understanding when you call somebody a Nazi you're giving them -- you're giving other people license to hurt them. So, that's what Donnie Deutsch is doing. And I've not heard a peep from MSNBC about this. That is dangerous stuff.

WATTERS: And Cynthia Nixon is doing the same thing, Candace, when she's calling ICE agents terrorists. I mean, comparing them to ISIS, to al- Qaeda, that, again, gives license to people -- who know what they're going to do.

OWENS: Right. I feel -- they're missing the point here. They're missing the point of Trump's presidency, this America-first concept that we're talking about. What he did here is really tremendous bringing out these families, these angel families.

We never hear the left's outrage. We never hear the names of all of the families that were separated permanently, as he said, permanently from their children because of illegal immigration. This is why their outrage is never taken seriously. And, look, let me say on behalf of all conservatives. Nobody wants to see a parent separated from their child.
That is awful across the board. That's not what we're saying here whatsoever. But the selective outrage here is what needs to end.

WATTERS: There is selective outrage to the Kate Steinle point we've made the other day. And also the border agent who was killed by a gun that Eric Holder's team allowed to walk across into Mexico. You just don't hear the similar type of outrage when Americans die at the hands of illegals when you have people separated at the border temporarily.

WILLIAMS: I think you do. But I think that the problem here is the context, Jesse, which is that, in fact, the crime rate among illegal immigrants is lower than there is crime rate among people who are born natives of our country. But there is selective attention, I think, by President Trump on illegal immigrants and crime because he has made them whipping boys, and I think that's unfortunate.

WATTERS: Oh, I don't know about that. I think people want the law respected. And they don't want people coming across and harming American citizens because those types of crimes can be prevented because they shouldn't be here in the first place.

KENNEDY: Well, it's also -- I'm going to defend ICE a little bit because I think they have the toughest job. They really do. And they're the ones who are torn. And when you have zero tolerance policy there's really no discretion that they can use.

And, you know, they have to become very good like instant in the field psychologists trying to discern if people are coming to this country because they're scared, they're hurt, and they're desperate, or if they really mean to do people harm. And, you know, we have so many layers of bureaucracy that are completely damaged that are not functioning properly and a lot of that rests on the shoulders of these ICE agents.

So, for Cynthia Nixon to say that they're a bunch of terrorists I think is incredibly shortsighted and naive because they're torn between an administration that's having a tough time messaging and a Department of Justice who's saying the opposite of what they're told to do by homeland security.

So, I think, you know, they really are between a rock and a hard place because they are the front line. And we have to find a better way of allowing people into this country who want to work, and if that means changing the immigration laws, Democrats that are stopping hysterical about this whole thing and craft some immigration policy that makes things less chaotic --

WILLIAMS: Well, let the Republicans work cooperatively on a bipartisan basis.

OWENS: We did not elect President Trump to defend Mexican illegal immigrants that want to come into this country for a better opportunity. We elected him to defend Americans. And that's exactly what he's doing.

KENNEDY: But he's also said he stood at campaign rallies and said we need more people working in this country. We need to allow people from other countries to come into this country.

OWENS: Legally.

KENNEDY: If that's the case, that's fine. The immigration system is broken. And when you put more restrictions on legal immigration, it makes it much harder for the president to fulfill that promise of delivering labor.

GUTFELD: Kennedy, you're such a Miranda.


KENNEDY: I'm a Charlotte, and you take that back.

GUTFELD: No, you are a Miranda. I'm a Charlotte.

WATTERS: All right, ahead, mainstream media is going wild over the first lady's fashion choices. We're going to break it down next on "The Five."


KENNEDY: That's right. First lady Melania Trump under fire by critics for wearing this jacket with the lettering on the back that reads, I really don't care, do you? Well, this happened while she was on her way to visit migrant children separated from their parents at the border. The media, of course, went too frenzy. Watch.


UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: That she would go down there and do this tells us everything that we need to know. I mean, she's officially the Marie Antoinette of this administration that she just say let them eat cake.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: A week ago, the Washington Times wrote a piece saying never before has there been as beautiful or graceful a first lady as Melania Trump. I guess she wanted to flush that down the toilet.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: These are moment of true candor from her. I mean, this administration doesn't care about these kids.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I'm going to guess this is one message she did not steal from Michelle Obama.


KENNEDY: Oh, ouch. Celebrity also attacking the first lady, Chelsea Handler tweeting, Mrs. Trump is speaking, quote, broken English in a, quote, dumb jacket at the border. And Kathy Griffin claims the first lady knew what she was doing while, of course, dropping explicative, so creative, Kathy. All right, Candace, you love this story.

OWENS: I do. And, look, I have to agree. I was a little outrage because the jacket was out of stock when I went to go buy it. And I do feel that her responsibility is to make sure if she's going to pawn a jacket that causes an earthquake that we can at least go and buy it.

WATTERS: How much is it?


WATTERS: That's it?

OWENS: At $39. And this, again, talks about that selective outrage that they have. This is the same week, mind you, that Peter Fonda tweeted -- insinuated that there should be pedophiles in a cage to go after Baron Trump. Silenced from the land of celebrities that she puts on a Zara jacket and they absolutely lose their mind.

KENNEDY: Yeah, but the Zara jacket was saying something, wasn't it, Juan?

OWENS: She was -- she wanted to be comfortable on the plane.


WILLIAMS: No, I think -- you know, so, I mean, my instinct -- actually, is first just technical matter which is why didn't her staff say, hey, Mrs. Trump, this is not good. You're going to visit children and it's going to open you up to a lot of incoming criticism from people who don't like you or don't like the president, whatever. It certainly don't like a policy of separating children from parents. So, I was kind of like, well, why didn't-- not only that Kennedy, she wore it a second time. So, she wears it going down there and gets -- then she wears it going back --

KENNEDY: She didn't wear it at Texas. She wore it --

WILLIAMS: No, right, at either end. So, the question is, you know, I mean, like Stephen Colbert said when his staff saw it they though this is a fake. This is not a real -- it can't be real. And when it's real is like, oh, my God, what do we do with this because, you know, people are going to attack, oh, it's left wing media. But, you know what, I think this is really -- I mean, I just don't understand how you can be that lacking in sensitivity or sensibility to think that's an appropriate message.

KENNEDY: It is an odd look. But, Jesse, there was an obsession when Mrs. Trump was out of sight for several weeks. And now that they've found her, they can't stop disparaging her. Why is there such an obsession over her?

WATTERS: Well, one the reasons is that Melania doesn't speak a lot in public, so she doesn't give the media a lot to chew on. So, when she's quiet or when she's laying low for a while, you know, things start spinning and they start, you know, flushing out all these conspiracy theories. The jacket would have been easier if she had explained it, she didn't. It's obviously a provocative statement. There's no way Melania wore that to say I don't care about migrant kids.

And for the media to impugn her motives and her character is ridiculous. Everybody knows Melania cares about the migrant families. Everybody knows she has a heart and she's going down there to show she has heart and to check in on how these migrant kids are being treated. With that said, you know what? She could have done without the message on the back of the jacket and that would have been fine. It was a little distraction. The media is always going to try to harm her because they don't like her husband.

KENNEDY: Well, but, also, her husband often leads the media where he wants to go. And, perhaps, the first lady is doing the exact same thing.

GUTFELD: You hit the nail on the head, Miranda.

KENNEDY: No, it's Charlotte, Samantha.

GUTFELD: Miranda. You're Miranda, I am Charlotte. That very -- OK. That very message on the jacket created the eruption in which the response is the jacket. It was perfect performance art. The message is, "I really don't care. Do you?" is the message and somebody goes, look what you have on your jacket. I really don't care. And that's it. And the thing is because her actions are actually counter to the message. I mean it's like she really doesn't care about this.

No, actually she tweeted that she didn't like the separation and she went down there to visit. So her message -- her actual actions are not what the deed is. So, I think it was some kind of -- it was a manufactured intentional trigger to set off the mind readers in the media, what kind of evil person would do this, you know, but there she is, doing good. Smart lady.

KENNEDY: You know what's interesting --

GUTFELD: I like her.

KENNEDY: -- no leaks from --

GUTFELD: She is not a Miranda, Kennedy.

WATTERS: No leaks from her side? Maybe her people should start running things at the White House --

CANDACE: It's a jacket. It's a jacket.

KENNEDY: And I think that that's exactly right. But, you know, if she made a statement she could probably squash the whole thing. But her office has also not leaked. So, it's very impressive in that regard.

GUTFELD: Maybe that jacket prevents leaking.

WILLIAMS: Yes. The president -- the president tried to explain it.


WILLIAMS: Yes, and he tried to explain and didn't work because it didn't match what she was telling.

OWENS: Well, he just likes to troll the media and the media falls for it every single time.

GUTFELD: I'm just amazed it's only 39 bucks.

OWENS: It's just a jacket.

WILLIAMS: Yes, most of her stuff is a little more pricier.

KENNEDY: I know she wore a $51,000 coat. That's how you do it. That's comfort.

GUTFELD: You don't wear a $51,000 coat when you're travelling to --

KENNEDY: I don't but I would nick (ph) it from her if I could.

GUTFELD: Typical Miranda.

OWENS: Out of stock. Out of stock.

KENNEDY: (Inaudible) Miranda. Never. Well the end of free speech as we know it may be upon us. A shocking leaked memo reveals the ACLU could be wavering in its support for the first amendment. Details, next.


OWENS: Controversy brewing at the American Civil Liberties Union as a leaked memo reveals waning supports for the First Amendment. According to a confidential memo obtained by the "Wall Street Journal," ACLU staffers, right, "Our defense of speech may have a greater or lesser harmful impact on the equality and justice work to which we are also committed."

This memo also notes that free speech can cause marginalized groups harm by undermining their civil rights, "Speech that denigrates such groups can inflict serious harms as intended to and often will impede progress toward equality."

ACLU is responding to the leak saying it will continue to defend the speech rights of the unpopular whether they agree with them or not. Greg, is this problematic?

GUTFELD: Oh, I love the word problematic. The most popular word among people who are about to destroy you. What you just said was very problematic. You are expelled. I mean, this is scary. The last defense of free speech is falling, the ACLU. I mean, they are the guys that are supposed to stick next to the worst people. I mean, they defended Nazis, right? And I mean, I think this explain --

KENNEDY: Illinois Nazis.

GUTFELD: Yes, the worst kind? Is that what you're saying? But Dave Rubin had a good tweet today where he said that the Democratic Party is being eaten by the lefts and decent Liberals need to find a new home because the home right now, this oppressor versus oppressed ideology is making almost everybody an oppressor except for a precious few who will now then turn on each other in this identity politics world. And it's frightening to see this happening on campuses by young people -- young people.

OWENS: Absolutely. I agree. Jessie, this document was marked confidential attorney-client work product. They went through great lengths to hide this.

WATTERS: So we know it's real and it's true. I would think that it seems like they care more about feelings than about rights. And it's a rights- driven organization and it's scary because they are so concerned about equality of feelings, not equality of rights. And they are also worried about the marginalized people. Now, these people who are marginalized, I mean, if you probably add them all up, there is marginalized people than non-marginalized people.

But if you keep treating marginalized people like children, they are going to remain marginalized. I think every adult in this country can hear something and be okay and not have to run to mommy. Like you said, they have defended the KKK, the Westboro Baptist Church, the worst people in the world. They protest at military funerals. The Washington Redskins logo, Juan, they have defended and even terrorists in Guantanamo Bay.

So the core mission is still there, but I think they are getting caught up in, you know, these identity politics word games and it's destroying their credibility.

OWENS: Absolutely. And Juan, do you think if this memo goes into effect it will disproportionately affect one political party over the other? Do you think there could be a little bias thing in there?

WILLIAMS: Wait a minute. You mean you associate neo-Nazis and white nationalist with one party?

OWENS: No, I'm talking about -- I'm talking about free speech.

WILLIAMS: I don't know which party that might be.

OWENS: I'm talking about free speech.

WATTERS: Antifa.

WILLIAMS: Well, let me just say that when you look back at something like Charlottesville -- we're coming up on a year after that, Candace, you can understand why people are starting to think. Well, gosh, historically the ACLU has had people drop off the board, complain about them because they have done exactly what have you heard, defend the KKK, defend people who were Nazis. And people said well, that's the ACLU. They have to stand up for the First Amendment rights of free speech.

But in the current environment, people are now having second thoughts saying wait a second. You are really standing up for hate speech and guess what? Hate speech is a legitimate part of speech. Now we know you are not allowed to yell fire in a crowded theater. I don't think they have ever tried to defend that.

And so the question becomes at what point are they simply becoming an arm of people who are acting in an un-American, in fact, antithetical to American values way, and should the ACLU be putting money into defending that kind of speech. That's a real good question.

GUTFELD: I once shouted theater in a fire.

OWENS: What do you think Kennedy? Can speech actually inflict harm and should they be doing more to prevent certain kinds of speech.

KENNEDY: Subjectively, yes. You can you feel harmed by someone else's speech. That does not mean that someone has objectively harmed you.


KENNEDY: And the ACLU, in defending the First Amendment, was objectively defending something that was an umbrella that covered everyone. But now there are groups that take these slights subjectively and say regardless of intention, this has hurt me and I internalize it this way. And so it becomes the application of subjective group think.

And that becomes the marginalizing principle now because if you have certain aspects that you no longer defend, because you are worried that they are going to offend certain people, that means that it is an unbalanced application of what your charter is meant to do and what the ACLU was meant to do in the first place.

And that means if they really do apply these new standards, these new politically correct standards, and there are a lot of people who despise some of the things that the ACLU has defended in the past. But defending is not condoning but if they give that up it just means that we are in such a hyper polarized world.

OWENS: I think the slope gets incredibly slippery especially with college campuses having safe spaces against free speech. You know, hate speech is way too subjective of a term. Everything that is considered offensive, just like you brought up Jesse, will start to go in this box. But don't go anywhere, Fan Mail Friday is up next.


GUTFELD: Yes. You just want to chicken dance to that, don't you? Fan Mail Friday.

KENNEDY: From Groundhog Day?

GUTFELD: What? Enough out of you, Kennedy. Facebook question from Karen L., "If you were to sell something door to door, what would it be? Juan?

WILLIAMS: Well, I think I feel failure. You know, I mean, people -- I always think how do people do cold calls? I don't know. And how do you show up at somebody's door especially today. I mean, there used to be a day in America of door-to-door salesmen.


WILLIAMS: But today that doesn't exist. You would be like dude, get out of here, right?

GUTFELD: Yes. You know you should sell hugs then.


GUTFELD: Yes. I'm just here to hug. And give them away for free. Why sell them? Candace, what would you --

OWENS: That's really difficult. In this day and age, door-to-door or just in general if I could sell something.

GUTFELD: Maybe it's something -- the question is something that you really, really like that you wished other people would have. That's what the question is.

WATTERS: I know what I would do. I would sell guns and here's why.

WILLIAMS: Oh my god, help us, lord.

WATTERS: You knock on the door and you say, look, I have all these weapons. I think you need to buy some weapons. It's unsafe here.

GUTFELD: Geez-Louise.

WATTERS: And they're going to buy.

KENNEDY: Well, without violating federal law. I mean, pack (ph) away, and don't get me wrong. I would sell either chocolate because everyone loves chocolate.

OWENS: I don't like chocolate.

KENNEDY: If they didn't buy it, I would eat it. And I am fine with that. I would eat an --

WATTERS: You'd get high with your own supply.

GUTFELD: You get another shot.

OWENS: I do not like chocolate. I genuinely do not know what I would sell.
I would be terrible at --

GUTFELD: All right. See I would sell --

WATTERS: That's not how this works.

GUTFELD: I would sell a book healing back pain. I bet people at home know what that is. Do you ever heard -- what's his name? Sarnof? Sarno?

KENNEDY: And Howard Stern was --

GUTFELD: Yes, I would sell that book because every time I give that book to somebody they get rid of their back pain.

WATTERS: I can't believe you weren't going to sell the monologues.

GUTFELD: By the way, I would sell -- I would sell the "Gutfeld Monologues," which are available now by the way.

WILLIAMS: No, no, no. My idea for you is that, you know that guy you mock all the time who has ads on Fox News Channel about catheters and gold.

GUTFELD: Oh, you mean (inaudible)?

WILLIAMS: Yes. That's the one.

WATTERS: Juan just advertise that --

KENNEDY: He just sells gold catheters.

GUTFELD: Oh, gold catheter. All right. What -- this is from J.P. Adams Instagram, what song puts you in a good mood? Kennedy?

KENNEDY: Instantly, it's Fergie Glamorous. Something about the positivity of that song and the beat G-L-A-M. I know it's not punk rock. I know it's not cool. I don't care. She feels it therefore I feel it and I would run so fast I'd break my foot.


WATTERS: I like the last song that you bumped in with. Can we get that again? Candace and I were kind of rocking to that beat right there.

GUTFELD: That was good polka.

WATTERS: What was that?

GUTFELD: That was polka.


GUTFELD: Yes. Polka is a forgotten art of music.

WATTERS: It all in a comeback trail.

GUTBERG: Yes, it is. What do you dig?

WILLIAMS: The other day we had a bump song, wasn't it like Friday night just got paid. I like that. That's one -- that's upbeat, right.


WILLIAMS: Bruno Mars tends to be upbeat type stuff, you know, Uptown Funk and all. I like that kind of thing. But, you know, I like Oh Happy Day and I know you guys will think it's crazy but it's a very positive song.

GUTFELD: How about you Candace?

OWENS: So it's either Bruno Mars' Uptown Funk or Kanye West's Ghost Town. I'm not saying that because I'm Candace Owens.

WATTERS: Yes you are.

OWENS: I'm not. I'm being serious.

WATTERS: The same words.

OWENS: The album is amazing. It actually is number one in 83 countries. I'm not the only one who thinks --

GUTFELD: I'm torn. It's either Honey Bucket by the Melvins or it's Raining Men. All right, it's a joke.

KENNEDY: Which would be very dangerous but still quite fun.

GUTFELD: Yes. I don't condone Raining Men. All right, Kate L. Facebook question, what is your favorite ride at amusement parks? Candace?

OWENS: Absolutely whatever roller coaster is really high and I actually hate it. So it's bizarre that I do it but I make this really bad face and I like to be tortured on these roller coasters so, it would --

GUTFELD: That is weird. That is weird that people will --

OWENS: It's really weird. I don't like it.

GUTFELD: Yes, you don't like it but you still do get excited.


GUTFELD: All right, Jesse.

WATTERS: I going to go roller coaster, too. And then I like when they get the photo of you and then you look at the photo and your face looks like all mangled like that.


WATTERS: What were you going to say?

GUTFELD: I was going to make a joke about your face but then I thought, you know, I'm going to --

WATTERS: That's just not nice.

GUTFELD: Yes, it's not nice. Kennedy?

KENNEDY: I like anything at Cedar Point. It is a fantastic amusement park.
They have the steepest, fastest roller coasters in the country and some parts of the world. And I also like Superman at Six Flags. You get shot straight up 400 feet.

GUTFELD: Oh, I don't like that.

KENNEDY: And then you're suspended --

OWENS: A lot of people have died on that ride.

KENNEDY: It's (inaudible) so you're instantly shot up --

WATTERS: Greg is not allowed on that ride. There is height limit there.

GUTFELD: I did not make the face joke. But now I realize I made a mistake. I didn't make a face joke. All right, Juan, what's your amusement park ride?

WILLIAMS: Well I think the answer would be bumper car because remember when we went --

GUTFELD: I love that.

WILLIAMS: -- when we went to Hershey Park --


WILLIAMS: -- and we were like bumping into each other, boom, boom, boom. And you find out who is aggressive. Some were aggressive.

GUTFELD: Oh yes. Dana.

WILLIAMS: Yes, that's exactly what I --

GUTFELD: Dana was an animal. I can't call her an animal. But she was -- she was very, very aggressive.

WILLIAMS: They're like pretty aggressive.

GUTFELD: I was going to say the tea cups.

WATTERS: I knew it.

GUTFELD: I love the tea cups.

WILLIAMS: Yes. Tilt-a-Wheel. How about Tilt-a-Wheel?

GUTFELD: Tilt-a-Wheel, yeah.

WILLIAMS: When people start to get upset stomachs --

GUTFELD: Upset stomachs and they're puking.

WILLIAMNS: You're like, wait a second. I don't want to be tilting in the wrong direction.

GUTFELD: We got time for one more question, @sherkaberka. I don't even know that means.

WATTERS: Sherka Berka (ph)?

GUTFELD: I have no -- it's a fake name. I shouldn't read the names. What would your personalized license plate say?

WATTERS: H2OS Watters.

KENNEDY: You thought about that and that is problematic.

WATTERS: It's my dad.

KENNEDY: Oh, is it?

WILLIAMS: Oh, isn't that (inaudible).


OWENS: That was way too good.

GUTFELD: That is so funny. Kennedy?

KENNEDY: It would probably say Kendy (ph) because I would have to lose some letters because someone has already got Kennedy so, it would be bastardization.

GUTFELD: Watch your mouth! This is 5:00 hour, Miranda.



WILLIAMS: So, you know, the kids like to (inaudible) off me and they call me Dr. Black Ice.


WILLIAMS: Yes because, you know, you're slick and you don't see it kind of thing.

OWENS: Mine would be something cat related, maybe just meow. I just love cats so much. I think anything that could just be cat related would make me really happy.

WATTERS: I thought you were going to say Yeezy.

OWENS: You know what, I should have made that plug. Yeezy.

GUTFELD: I just wrote mine down to be RTB547. I would like to have a vanity plate that is just completely von (ph) vanity.

WATTERS: That's not to --

OWENS: It sounds like "Star Wars."

GUTFELD: Now I got to change it.

OWENS: "Star Wars" seven or something.

GUTFELD: You're a fan of "Star Wars." Not a big fan of Kirk.

OWENS: I hate to say that.

KENNEDY: We're going to get a lot of hate mail for that.


OWENS: Come on --

WATTERS: (Inaudible) Ewoks.

GUTFELD: Yes. One More Thing is up next.


WILLIAMS: Time for fun, time for One More Thing, Jesse?

WATTERS: Well Gutfeld has been crushing it on Saturday night so I did what the only thing I know how to do. I went back to the streets and asked some basic questions of average Americans. Here's a taste.


WATTERS: Who is the vice president?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I don't know and I really don't care.



WATTERS: Can I give you a hint?


WATTERS: Mike --



WATTERS: So there it is, "Watters World" Saturday night 8:00 eastern.
Check me out.

KENNEDY: No shortage of dumb dumb.

WILLIAMS: It's always fun.

WATTERS: Makes me feel better about myself.

WILLIAMS: All right, so I got some good news this week. I won the Washington, D.C. Society of Professional and Journalist award for the best weekly columnist.

OWENS: Congratulations.

WILLIAMS: The column appears on Mondays in "The Hill," thehill.com and I want to thank my editors, Niall Stanage, Bob Cusack as well as the publisher Jimmy Finkelstein. There has been a lot of criticism of journalism in the news lately, fake news, enemy of the American people, but we're lucky to live in a country where honest journalism and different opinions are available to us all. And that's the basis of an informed American people and we are the basis of this great republic. So hats off to the First Amendment. ACLU, watch yourself. Greg.

GUTFELD: Got you. All right, my book. If you haven't purchased it yet you might be going to hell. Go to Amazon or Barnes & Nobile or Simon & Schuster

WATTERS: You believe in hell.

GUTFELD: It's all -- I do believe in hell. I'm in it right now. Anyway, "Greg Gutfeld Show" 10:00 p.m. Saturday. We are crushing it Jesse and your little man on the streets are not going to stop me. At 10:00 p.m. I got Emily Compago, Joe Devito, Kat Timpf, Tyrus. It's going to be a great show.

WILLIAMS: Wow. You got to watch. Kennedy?

KENNEDY: Well, if there are two things I love in this world, is that --


KENNEDY: Three things, Greg Gutfeld, ice tea, and fat food. Unfortunately, at a Raising Cane's in Kansas City, Missouri, a woman got awful creative when she was stirring the ice tea -- she did it with her arm including her hand inside the ice tea jug and then she poured it into the dispenser while a coworker filmed the whole thing and laughed and then it went viral on social media. Of course, 1.2 million people so far have seen this disgusting display. You don't know where that hand has been, but rest assured it hasn't been washed in half a decade.

WILLIAMS: So this remind -- remember there was some, I think she was a rock and roll star and she went and took a lick off of a --

KENNEDY: Ariana Grande.

WILLIAMS: Yes. That's what it reminds me of.

GUTFELD: Grossed me out. These are not good One More Things. I don't want to see sick things.

WILLIAMS: That's not good. All right.

GUTFELD: Do you have a catch line (ph).

WILLIAMS: So, wait, wait. We have good One More Thing. We go to Candace.

OWENS: Actually this is going to make you give up on humanity, but this is amazing and should be discussed. A food vendor sold an unusual product in Vancouver British Columbia. He literally sold hot dog water, $40 a bottle. He claimed that it increased brain function, makes you look younger, helps you lose weight, increases overall vitality, but it was just a piece of performance art --

WATTERS: That's what I would sell door to door, Greg.

OWENS: -- and people actually bought it.

GUTFELD: Yes, that's what I would do.

OWENS: That's what I would sell door-to-door.

GUTFELD: But it's water.

OWENS: People actually bought it at $40 a pop.

KENNEDY: Beautiful.

OWENS: And his fine print was hotdog water in its absurdity hopes to encourage critical thinking related to product marketing.

KENNEDY: That is less of a market.

OWENS: Brilliant. Fantastic.

GUTFELD: Bottled water is a scam in and of itself.

OWENS: Those were really hotdog water.

GUTFELD: It really is -- we're actually -- if our grandparents -- well, some of them are alive, but if you're great grandparents were alive and they say you are actually paying for water. They would be outraged. Outraged, I tell you.

OWENS: If you package it pretty Americans will pretty much buy anything.

GUTFELD: That is true.

KENNEDY: But you can make all of those claims I think is hysterical, but you know what --

OWENS: It is hilarious.

KENNEDY: I actually believe it. I think hotdog water is quite good.

OWENS: I wonder if someone drank it.

GUTFELD: I would like hamburger water. I would like water water.

WILLIAMS: It's a lot like the thesis that, you know, there is sucker born every minute, but that makes a performance art.

GUTFELD: Jess Watter Watter (ph). There should be Jesse Watter Watter (ph). Jesse Watter Watter (ph)

WATTERS: Black ice water.

WILLIAMS: I would be like a glacier.

WATTERS: Anyway, (inaudible) called you back by the way. Did you read that? No more global warming.

WILLIAMS: All right, gentlemen, gentlemen. That's it for us. See you guys Monday. "Special Report" up next with Bret Baier. Hey Bret.


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