President Trump celebrates after Senate impeachment trial acquittal

This is a rush transcript from "The Five," February 6, 2020. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

NEIL CAVUTO, FOX NEWS ANCHOR: Some would even argue we've never seen it before. "The Five" starts right now.

DANA PERINO, FOX NEWS HOST: Hello, everyone. I am Dana Perino, along with Emily Compagno, Juan Williams, Lawrence Jones, and Greg Gutfeld. It is 5:00 in New York City, and this is THE FIVE. President Trump has been acquitted, but the fight over impeachment appears far from over, a triumphant Trump taking a major victory lap at the National Prayer Breakfast this morning, holding up an acquitted newspaper headline and attacking his political foes.


DONALD TRUMP, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: I don't like people who use their faith as justification for doing what they know is wrong, nor do I like people who say I pray for you when they know that that's not so.


PERINO: Nancy Pelosi responding with these harsh words.


REP. NANCY PELOSI (D-CA): I pray hard for him because he is so off the track of our Constitution, our values, our country. He's talking about things that he knows little about, faith and prayer. He is impeached forever, no matter what he says or whatever headlines he wants to carry around.


PERINO: Pelosi also taking direct aim at the president's state of the union speech, which she tore up.


PELOSI: To me, like -- a little fixated being last year, too. And what happened instead was the president using the Congress of the United States as a backdrop for a reality show. I tore up a manifesto of mistruths. And I don't need any lessons from anybody, especially a president of the United States, about dignity. Next year, we will have a new president of the United States. It's an absolute imperative for our country.


PERINO: Then this afternoon, the president going off on impeachment, Pelosi, and much more.


TRUMP: We were treated unbelievably unfairly. And you have to understand, we first went through Russia, Russia, Russia. It was all bull -- Adam Schiff is a vicious, horrible person. Nancy Pelosi is a horrible person. And she wanted to impeach a long time ago, and she said I pray for the president. I pray for the pre -- she didn't pray. She may pray but she prays for the opposite.

They brought me to the final stages of impeachment. But now, we have that gorgeous word. I never thought a word with sound so good. It's called total acquittal.


PERINO: All right, Emily, total acquittal. You heard it.

EMILY COMPAGNO, FOX NEWS HOST: This was funny because he said -- look, think what resonates with me so strongly here is the small world that Pelosi is living in that she truly doesn't see that this entire time what's resonated with this president and for the American people is the fact that the entire time he has aligned himself with them, with you, and me.

He's never badmouthed or criticized the public or an entire segment of the population, which is why the Democrats continue to shoot themselves in the foot and continue to seem so out of touch. And it's also why the American people took such offense at her ripping up that speech because it was ripping up them. It was ripping up names and policies and help and identification and a feeling of being heard that this president has done this entire time.

And, you know, we've sat through two years of Mueller and then six months of impeachment. And the Democrats have tried to sell the American people what they say that Trump did, what they said he did. And no one wants to go off that ledge anymore. We have been sold a bombshell over and over again. Who wants to take another leap of faith?

Everyone is exhausted. And to see her perpetuating that same self-lie in that same echo chamber, there's nothing to show for it, except our fatigue, and the fact that she's not going to be speaker next time around.

PERINO: Greg, the speaker is having what you would call a no-good, very bad week.

GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS HOST: Yes. I don't know if it can get any worse but it probably could. I have a piece advice for these people. If you want to get Trump out of the White House, here is an easy strategy. Wait five years, OK? That's all you have to do. I know people are all upset about the presser, but he deserves do -- I would've been worse. I mean, three years.

PERINO: There's no doubt. You would've been so --


GUTFELD: I -- at least he thanked everybody. I would've just been screaming my head -- I would be using much, much worse language.


GUTFELD: I thought the presser was hilarious. I thought it was great. He was right to say everything. But I'm aware that there will be people, like Juan, who disagree completely and people out there. So there is one side that feels really bad about this and one side that's ecstatic. So we can agree that the both sides are looking at the same thing and seeing two different things, right?

So what's the answer? Which side is best at predicting the outcomes? So when you have these two different visions, what predicted the implosion of collusion or the obstruction or Kavanaugh, impeachment? It's the people who were happy today, right? That side has been able to predict, with almost 100 percent certainty, what was going to happen.

And the other side, which is so emotionally damaged, that's damaged because every time their side is wrong because of their cognitive dissonance, they cannot understand why the vision in their head isn't matching the reality outside. And so you have these people -- Nancy did not look like -- she looked like she had had it.

And I think for reasons that had nothing to do with Trump. But her own side has not helped her. Every time that they predict something, it's bad and it bleeds into Iowa. They get everything wrong, should learn something.

PERINO: January was like Iran, impeachment. Then they have Iowa. It is like the ides of February, Juan. What's going on? What do you think about the speaker's response today?

JUAN WILLIAMS, FOX NEWS HOST: I think she was right. I mean, look, I just couldn't believe what the president did in the East Room. I mean, obviously, we just played him using profanity. I just don't think it's me when I see a president behave like that. And, you know, I think this is inappropriate and wrong. I think most Americans, by the way, would agree with me.

I don't think it's that he's in touch with Americans. I think he did a power play. And there were a lot of spineless Republicans in the Senate who just couldn't deal with a matter of conscience. And when it comes to religion, which was so central, by the way, in the way that Mitt Romney --


WILLIAMS: -- hang on. Yes, what Romney did and what Nancy Pelosi did would say this is appalling behavior. And they, therefore, acted in accordance with their conscience and with their faith as what Mitt Romney said.

GUTFELD: It's inconvenient.


WILLIAMS: -- in other words, and then the president speaks to this religion angle today, Dana. But, of course, he behaved inappropriately at the prayer breakfast. This guy --


LAWRENCE JONES, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: -- when he said she was sedated.


WILLIAMS: -- this guy doesn't know anything about religion. He doesn't know anything about forgiveness, about humility. No, he doesn't. He doesn't live his life that way. He says he doesn't forgive people. Greg, you said don't judge words, judge by actions. Look at his actions.

GUTFELD: Yes, and now he's acquitted. That's a great action.

WILLIAMS: This guy does not live like Jesus. This is not a Christian life.

PERINO: All right. Let's get Lawrence.

JONES: Here's the deal. For years, we've heard the Democrats say that Nancy Pelosi was the adult in the room. She doesn't do name-calling. She called the president sedated today. She's classy. She's about decorum. In the House, she ripped up his speech. And so the Democrats can no longer claim that they have the moral high ground.

And what I've been telling people for years is that the way Trump behaves is much like many of the people that are in the House. Many of the other leaders, they just do it behind closed doors. The difference from Trump is, he is who he is, and this was a day of celebration because not only was it about him. They destroyed this man's family, went after everyone in the cabinet, went after every business associate.

They used political pressure in the prosecution to squeeze people on false charges that had nothing to do with collusion. They destroyed everyone that was associated with the president. So, of course --


WILLIAMS: So he just gets away with lying?


WILLIAMS: Oh, he just lies in the state of the union. He tells outright lies about healthcare. Oh, I am protecting people with pre-existing conditions.


WILLIAMS: Don't a say word.

JONES: -- Democrats on pre-existing conditions. But again, you all didn't want to stand up for the kids, with school choice. You all didn't want to stand for the Tuskegee airmen.


JONES: -- essentially more people being on food stamps.

WILLIAMS: You know what I liked about that speech -- the state of the union, it was reality TV with a TV performance, but it was insulting to the House, because you don't give Rush Limbaugh a Medal of Freedom. The first lady put it. It was just like a sideshow.


JONES: Democrats would think their strategy as the president is rising in approval rating or they're still going to take this and say you all trying to impeach him. You all tried for the Russian conspiracy. And it still didn't work. His approval rating is going up.

PERINO: All right. We've got to go.


PERINO: Believe me. Greg will take a look at some of the most the most over-the-top reactions to impeachment, not including the one you just saw.


GUTFELD: The consequence of a delusion, the breakdown that follows after truth is revealed.


UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Slash his throat, every effen Republican. Slash Republicans' throats. Slash fascist throats, death to fascists.


GUTFELD: That person is going to do well in life. Imagine being his parents. I would make a joke but I feel sorry for them. It's a break down. What you also see on social media where celebrities resort to, all caps, insanity in response to cheeky memes. Remember this one? Trump just reposted it, prompting Bette Midler to scream frantically.

You think this is a joke, don't you? It's not. He means it. He will change the rules. And his enablers will let him. If he wins again, he will rule until you until he dies. You die or both then you get Ivanka if you're lucky. Of course, that's a joke but maybe not. At least Ivanka is sane. Midler is so nutty. Elephants keep trying to eat her. Meanwhile, after Trump's presser, CNN goes full Freudian.


UNIDENTIFIED MALE: This was a very disturbing tableau for the country. It was dark because he's made clear that his mind is dark. This is somebody in deep psychological distress right now, self-pity, insecure, angry.


GUTFELD: That is a straight news reporter.

PERINO: Right.

GUTFELD: Once again, CNN's very best become psychiatrists, diagnosing mental illness. No surprise Harwood a paranoid narcoleptic who eats his own hair. I'm kidding. But see, anyone can play doctor, especially in times of hysteria when you see someone else's good time is your bad. Emotion fuels the anger. The media gins it up for ratings, making the hangover worse once the fantasy collapses.

It happened before, righteous rage followed by depression. And it'll happen again. But remember, the media and the Dems resorted to similar attacks on Reagan, Bush, McCain, Bourque (ph), and yes even poor Mitt, the dog abuser. But the attacks on Trump are more plentiful and more intense. Why is that, because he fought back?

Remember when people mocked Trump defenders who would say but he fights. Hell, they were right. It's why he's winning and why the other side keeps screaming. Dana, I have a theory that you should only tweet in all caps if your house is on fire, and then you shouldn't even be on Twitter.

PERINO: Yes. Like, for people that are on Twitter a lot, they think that they're having an impact, but it really is, like, they are just talking to themselves. It's like spitting in the wind.


PERINO: And it goes away so quickly so it's kind of pointless.

GUTFELD: That's rude, spitting in the wind, Dana.

PERINO: Well, if you spit in the wind, sometimes it comes back and hits you in the face.

GUTFELD: Exactly. It's an apt analogy for the Democrats.


PERINO: The other thing -- like Bernie fights.


PERINO: Right?

GUTFELD: Bernie fights, exactly.

PERINO: He's not going to take these Iowa results lying down.

GUTFELD: I take a lot of things lying down, Lawrence, because I'm lazy. Let me ask you this. Did you see that -- what did you think of that video of that kid? Isn't that the creepiest thing? I thought it was funny, and I they look at it. I go there's -- what is wrong with these people in college?

JONES: Well, I covered college for two years on campus reform, and this is typical behavior. These people -- and it is part of the professors' fall as well, because, you know, we think the other side just have -- I think Juan has bad ideas but I love Juan. We go. We have a drink and everything. They're being talked -- that the other side on college campuses are evil.


JONES: That they're a threat to Democracy, that they're a threat to the country. And when you have these developing minds that should be learning both sides of the political spectrum, and you put that nonsense in their head, they just start reacting like that.

GUTFELD: You know, Juan --


JONES: -- we don't know.

GUTFELD: Yes. I heard that that kid, Juan, is actually now getting a job at CNN as a media reporter.

WILLIAMS: Could be, or maybe he'll replace you, I don't know. It seems to me, though, that -- I mean it's crazy to extrapolate from -- that's just bad behavior, and clearly threatening. I would -- if the police are aware of it, they should be checking him out.


WILLIAMS: Drugs maybe an issue. But you can't extrapolate and say that's typical behavior on college campuses.


WILLIAMS: If you took an example of a right-winger saying something crazy and said all Republicans are all conservatives, we would say no, that's not fair.

GUTFELD: -- a trend, Juan. I have three examples.

WILLIAMS: Yes. So to me, the big news here it seems to me, look, trump and people who are upset, and I think lots of Democrats are upset at the idea that there was a power play that was devoid of paying attention to what was going on that you had Republicans who say he did something wrong, but we don't want to impeach him. It's like people just are lacking in saying conviction and holding to the promise to uphold the Constitution.

GUTFELD: All right. It's over, Juan. We've got to move on to the next step in this, which is the next impeachment. Emily, the thing that drives me crazy is the diagnosis, when people diagnose people's problems. I mean, doctors aren't allowed to do that without seeing a patient. But Harwood is?

COMPAGNO: I agree. Also, that video of that guy is that's my entire metaphor for the Democratic Party right now, which is that the Democratic Party leadership are screaming in the middle of their echo chamber. They are fueled entirely by emotion and contempt. And that's one of the Four Horsemen, right? Remember this.

John Gottman saying once you have contempt, like, the whole world is over. There's no -- you can't proceed with logic anymore. And meanwhile, while this guy is, like, literally going crazy, screaming at what he thinks is so true. All around him is everyone -- I've got to get to class in about 20 minutes. I'm videotaping this insane guy.

Like, what am I having for dinner? I've got to do this. Because meanwhile, we have these statistics that came that was covered in the state of the union. I mean, the DOW has been up almost 60 percent since the election, S&P almost 56 percent, 90 percent of Americans are satisfied with their personal life. These are things that matter.

So literally, the rest of the party watching the leadership in the middle go beside themselves and make no production whatsoever. And at the end of the day, we are going to learn at the ballot box who made the most sense to them. It's not Pelosi.

WILLIAMS: Yes. Well, let me just tell you. It's like -- what is it, 80 percent of Americans are represented by the senators who voted to convict and remove this president.

GUTFELD: Well, you know, it didn't work out. Coming up, bitter Democrats claim Trump wasn't really acquitted, plus, the media's new love affair with Mr. Mitt Romney.


WILLIAMS: The post impeachment political battle rages on, and some Democrats say President Trump was not truly acquitted. Take a look.


UNIDENTIFIED MALE: This vote is no vindication. It's no real acquittal. It's no victory.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: am uncomfortable with the word acquitted because that implies that there was a full and fair trial.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Well, but there's no vindication from a rigged trial.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: It's a giant asterisk next to the president's acquittal. (END VIDEO CLIP)

WILLIAMS: And Senator Mitt Romney, he's being praised for voting to convict President Trump on the abuse of power article of impeachment.


UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: God bless him for his courage.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: It will cement Senator Romney's legacy.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: I do want to salute Mitt Romney.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: This was a profile in courage.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I was listening to a decent and honorable man who stood up and did the right thing.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: He is now the president of the Republican resistance to Donald Trump.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: It was something that I've never actually seen since I've been in the Senate.


WILLIAMS: I guess they are saying that he voted as an act of conscience, Lawrence, and that, you know, it's a fact he was the one who stood up. I think I read today that in all the prior impeachments, the president who was being impeached was able to hold his party in line. So this is the first historically. But I think lots of Republicans saying, oh, it's just Democrats celebrating Romney. What do you think?

JONES: Well, it's clear, because he was the devil before, you know -- all this nonsense. You only have courage when you stand with the Democrats. That's apparently they have defined it as. Courage is when you decide to vote against the president. Look, on a sad note, though, this is bad for the Democrats. It is bitterness, and they can't move forward.

The game is over. He has been acquitted. That's it. You move on. You try to beat him in the next election. Instead, because they have no message, the party is in disarray. They don't know how to control the progressive wing. And I think this is not going to even be a competition when it comes to November. It won't be a competition, because they have no message.

They have no leadership right now, can't even run Iowa, right? But they are still worried about the president, impeachment, and so forth.

WILLIAMS: By the way, Dana, did you think that -- I saw that Mitt Romney did several interviews before he actually voted. Do you think he was trying to defend his legacy? How do you interpret what happened here?

PERINO: Well, I asked Mike Lee today who's on the daily briefing if -- because he is the other senator from Utah, if he had talked to Mr. Romney before, and the answer was no. But they -- I think he knew that the blowback was coming. He knew that he was going to be called a traitor. He knew people that people were going to mock his religion and say that he's just a faker.

So I think he knew all of that. So he is savvy enough to know, like, he lost the presidential election when Obama was up for re-election. And so he knew what the media attacks were going to be. But a couple of things, on the Democrats saying that he's not acquitted, do they now think that the media is fake news, because all of the headline say acquittal.

So it is acquittal. And I think that the spin that it's not really acquittal, that might work in some fundraising but it's not going to work at the ballot box for sure. Plus, don't forget it was Harry Reid, the senator -- when he was the majority leader, who suggested that Mitt Romney never paid taxes. And all these people who are praising Mitt Romney now did nothing to stand up and say that was wrong.

And even when Harry Reid later on was like I was just lying, but that's cool, right? All of them are, like, that's fine. You can do that to people and that's fine. Mitt Romney knows he's going to be lonely. And he will be eating alone at the lunch table. And I think he's accepted that.

WILLIAMS: It's funny. I remember that when Mitt Romney was nominated, you had Republicans speak so highly of him as a man of family, a man of faith, for example.

PERINO: Yes, of course.

WILLIAMS: And then in the last week, I've seen Republicans, conservatives just absolutely skewer him alive, Greg.

GUTFELD: Are you telling me that politics is a team sport thing that you end up supporting the person that is leaving the party?

WILLIAMS: No, but I'm saying that Republicans are now attacking and libeling Romney who once praised him --


GUTFELD: You know I don't have a problem. Mitt can do whatever he wants. And I think the Democrats need him. It's like, you know, how people have therapy animals after a really traumatic event. You know, is their therapy weasel. And they are clinging to him. At least we have Mitt, it's OK. You can have Mitt. I don't care. But I don't need anybody to lecture me on lack of character or a lack of conscience as though he's somehow the epitome of that.

Please, don't do that to me. I don't need that. Here's the deal. We have two different men, Mitt and Trump, they're vastly different. The Dems would have preferred to have Mitt because he doesn't fight, all right, but Trump does. So this is how the argument is always going to be. Mitt, he is the nice guy who loses. Trump's the animal who wins. And that upsets people. I don't care. I really don't.

WILLIAMS: I remember you did care when Trump insulted John McCain.

GUTFELD: And I have been through this. And I wrote a book on it. And I said that once he got elected and he became my president, I'd give him a chance.


WILLIAMS: You gave him a pass or a chance?

GUTFELD: Did you hear me?


WILLIAMS: I think you might just given him a pass.

GUTFELD: You know what? You're screwed up in the brain, Juan. I said chance.


WILLIAMS: When you said you give them a chance --

GUTFELD: Look at his deeds and not his words. I said this so many times --


GUTFELD: Do you sleep at this table?

WILLIAMS: But I'm saying, well, his deeds don't seem to support the idea that, oh yes, he's doing great.

GUTFELD: Look at the economy. Look at peace, look at prosperity.

WILLIAMS: Oh, my gosh.

GUTFELD: Oh my God, Juan. Yes, those are called deeds.

WILLIAMS: Look at --

GUTFELD: If you want to get mad about his words, you've been doing it for three years.

WILLIAMS: No, I'm saying, look at his deeds. I think --

GUTFELD: It gets you nowhere.

WILLIAMS: Has he delivered on the wall? Wait, has he delivered on wall? Has he done something about healthcare?

GUTFELD: Well, so far the wall is coming.

WILLIAMS: Our troops -- are we sending more troops to the Middle East? All right, so Emily.

COMPAGNO: So on Mitt, what's interesting is that you know, when he ran for president, those ads, the DNC ads, you guys remember those? Like Paul Ryan pushing the grandma off a cliff and big bird, and he was absolutely vilified. So it's a little difficult to take with any credibility or honesty. These people who are now championing him were the same people that say, Look, you're innocent until proven guilty.

I thought Senator Scott had an incredible comment today, which is that look, you know, we thought through 60 hours of testimony and 190 video clips and 13 witnesses, and look, if you started out with the presumption of innocence, then 100 percent there was an acquittal. But if you started out with a presumption and a self-conviction of guilt, then no wonder that you came to that guilt conclusion.

And really quickly on Hunter, because I think this is important and will probably be circling back to this. The Treasury Department has complied -- has complied with the Republican senators request for that the highly sensitive financial documents, right, for Hunter and his associates. And we have now a leading Democrat on the committee who's saying, we'll, the origins of the evidence are highly questionable.

And I just have to throw out there that, you know, the entire FISA court, the entire surveillance warrants, everything was based on evidence of questionable origin and no one cared about it back then. So I find it curious that automatically and already Democrats on the Hill are carrying about questionable origin of evidence when it comes to Hunter Biden.

WILLIAMS: All right, if you thought what's going on with the Iowa caucuses is bad, wait until you hear what just happened. It's unbelievable, but it's next for you on THE FIVE.


JONES: The DNC has said enough is enough with the disaster, that is the Iowa caucuses. Chairman Tom Perez is calling for an immediate re-candidacy. Even though we don't know who the -- who won the caucus yet, Bernie Sanders is declaring victory over Mayor Pete. And after his embarrassing showing in the Hawkeye State, Joe Biden is getting in the gutter to attack the new front runners.


JOE BIDEN (D), PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE: But if Senator Sanders is a nominee for the party, every Democrat in America up and down the ballot, blue states, red states, purple states will have to carry the label Senator Sanders has chosen for himself, Democratic Socialist. It's a risk, to be just straight up with you, for this party to nominate someone who's never held an office higher than mayor of a town of 100,000 people in Indiana.


JONES: But Bernie and Mayor Pete are fighting back against Biden's attacks.


SEN. BERNIE SANDERS (D-VT), PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE: Let me tell my good friend, Joe, that when we're dealing with somebody like Donald Trump, he will pin any label that he wants on any candidate.

PETE BUTTIGIEG (D), PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE: If that argument is about electability and the ability to win, we just had the first election of the 2020 process and I think that's my answer.


JONES: Wow. Dana, are you surprised that it took this long for them to actually fight?

PERINO: You know, I've been waiting for it for a long time because if you remember the 2015, beginning of that Republican Primary, that was a fight from the beginning, and it does never ended, and then it ultimately ended in the victory of President Trump.

For these guys, if Buttigieg is at 26.2 percent, Sanders at 26.1 percent, that is so close. And you can imagine that you might call for a recount, right? But I believe that Tom Perez, the head of the DNC, was trying to get ahead of the candidates. And he was calling for a recap and seeing -- which is a recount. That doesn't mean you have to go back and re caucus, it's just a recount because all the candidates are going to do it themselves.

Remember, the candidates had all their people keeping track as well, so they know. That's why I think Bernie Sanders feels very confident saying that he won. But I've also heard there's a lot of irregularities that came in. There's how many, is it 1,600 counties, Juan, or something, precincts? Just -- it's a lot to redo. And the Democrats desperately need some clarity as to where the party wants to go. They did not get it out of Iowa, but they'll get it in about five days in New Hampshire.

WILLIAMS: Well, I mean, you got to be careful here, because it's not Tom Perez's responsibility because it was done by the state party, not the national party. But I think that what you get here is Tom Perez is now trying to assert control. He's trying to say, listen, one of the problems we had that night was you had -- you know, Bret, Martha, and everybody else on the air and nothing being said, nothing explained.

So you had like a vacuum, and then you had conspiracy theories, finger- pointing and Trump celebrating, and jumping oh, the Democrats can't do anything. So I think he wants to take control and say, this is what happened and we're going to put it out, we're going to get this straight.

Now, just to those numbers that you see up on the screen, I'll say Sanders to me did very well. I think Buttigieg outperformed expectations by far, so he did very well. Biden, I think is struggling. And he didn't initially want to compete in Iowa, really didn't think that much about competing in New Hampshire because it's Bernie's home territory.

But what it means now is that he is on edge with regard to not only to Nevada, but South Carolina, and fundraising. He's got to start performing. If he's supposed to be elected, he got to win. By the way, that think Buttigieg said, ridiculous. Buttigieg can't even win a statewide election in Indiana. Joe Biden is senator many times over.

JONES: So Emily, I was down on the ground in Iowa, it was not foreign for me to see that Bernie Sanders did good in this because all the support, all the caucuses that I went to in the polling locations, they were all Bernie people. Should the Democratic Party be concerned that he looks like the new front runner?

COMPAGNO: Well, I think they should they should be concerned and they have been, right? We've been hearing kind of that growing swell of unease about his lead in these states. I think that just kind of jumping around a little bit, that notice all the headlines and the shaping about Sanders' win. Everyone is saying like, well, Buttigieg narrowly -- like it's all things about how -- they're kind of -- they're downplaying the fact that he absolutely soared there.

And I think we can't discount the fact that had that message is resonating, at least with those folks and probably more. I think the most impactful thing coming out of there for Biden was the margin. And you and I talked about this before on your show, the fact that, you know, it matters for donations, for fundraising, not in a myriad aspect with Nevada. But the fact that it matters, that margin from 26 to 15 is a really big deal.

And I can't remember if we talked about this in the beginning of the block, but Hillary Clinton coming from left field and like trying to be V.P. again.

JONES: Actually I think we have that sound. Let's play it for a second. We'll get Greg to react.

GUTFELD: Good transition.


ELLEN DEGENERES, TV HOST: If someone asks you to be a vice president, would you do it?

HILLARY CLINTON, FORMER DEMOCRATIC PRESIDENTIAL NOMINEE: Well, that's not going to happen. But no, probably no.

DEGENERES: You don't know that's not going to happen.

CLINTON: I think I do, yes.


CLINTON: Yes, I think I do.

DEGENERES: All right. But what if they did?

CLINTON: I never say never because I do believe --

DEGENERES: OK, so you're serving my country.

CLINTON: But it's not going to happen.


COMPAGNO: Yes, she doesn't --

JONES: Greg, What do you think? Well, she's actually -- she's often the distance waiting on a branch, right, overlooking this dusty desert highway, so she could swoop in, when the -- when Biden collapses or when the whole thing goes to hell, and she comes in. And I totally -- I thought she was going to get back in, and I said she wasn't. And my buddy Walter Kerns said, it's going to happen. And I'm beginning to think maybe it's true.

But I agree with Juan over Buttigieg that, you know, Buttigieg hasn't proved anything beyond mayor. However, when you listen to the candidates, he's still the smartest one. It's like you listen to him, and you just go well, yes, he could -- he could handle --

JONES: I think he could just rehearse.

GUTFELD: No, I think he could handle himself better with Trump than Joe. Joe, it's like I don't know. That's the way -- he had the -- start the new coke. You know, he's out in the parking lot shouting at clouds.

WILLIAMS: You know -- you know, one of the things that I think these days is we are in a culture war as -- and this culture now precedes politics in terms of policy.

GUTFELD: Yes, I agree.

WILLIAMS: If the Democrats are going to beat Trump, they got to start playing in terms of the culture war. So Greg, with -- who -- which of the Democrats do you think would be best against Trump?

GUTFELD: Well, geez, I would go -- right now I'm going to have to go with Buttigieg.


GUTFELD: Because I just think that he is the most articulate and persuasive of the group, though I do -- I do like Yang.

PERINO: And Democrats like --

JONES: All right, we got to leave it --

PERINO: Democrats do like to move forward generationally.

JONES: All right, we got to leave it there. The "FASTEST SEVEN" is back. Don't go anywhere.


COMPAGNO: Welcome back. Time for the "FASTEST SEVEN." First up. PETA now claims that it's derogatory to call animals pets. Instead, owners should say guardians or companion animals.

PERINO: Oh my god.

COMPAGNO: You, who have no pets.


GUTFELD: How do you know that? I don't call them pets.

COMPAGNO: Because you always say you hate dogs.

GUTFELD: I don't call them pets. You know what's interesting, ironic? So PETA is a movement that doesn't want to call the animals pets, yet there's a whole another movement, kind of downtown and also in San Francisco, where humans are treated as pets. You can put them on leashes and you can walk them around. Juan, don't act like you don't know it.

WILLIAMS: What are you talking about? Is this sexual stuff?


WILLIAMS: OK, OK, all right, all right.

COMPAGNO: Dana, what do you think?

PERINO: Well, I think it's interesting. Look, PETA is ridiculous. It's called PETA, obviously.

COMPAGNO: Oh, sorry.

GUTFELD: That was very clever.

PERINO: Peter, my husband, Peter, has something similar. When people say, do you own Jasper? And he'll say, well, he's our dog, but he doesn't -- he doesn't like to say that like we own him. Like as a dog owner.

GUTFELD: He owns you.

PERINO: You think that's how it works?

GUTFELD: Jasper owns you.


WILLIAMS: Back it up.

JONES: This is so much better.

WILLIAMS: Holy smoke.

GUTFELD: Oh my God. That would have gotten water in my face if I said --

PERINO: Well, there would be some reporters who's going to write about this and then you apologize.

COMPAGNO: Lawrence, what about you?

JONES: I just -- I'm so sick of PETA. I mean, it would be one thing if they were focusing on animal rights, making sure they're not abused and making sure -- but now they're dictating people's English. I mean, some people call their pets family.


JONES: It wouldn't be what I use, but I love them.

COMPAGNO: Any final words?

WILLIAMS: I don't know how to deal with this kind of situation. You know, I think the fact that we're talking about it gets us to think about it as an American people, that we suddenly start thinking about what what's our relationship with the animal that lives with us? That's not a bad thing.

PERINO: OK, you can say it. It's not the Washington Redskins. You can say pet.

WILLIAMS: That's bad. That's bad.

COMPAGNO: All right, next up.

WILLIAMS: But I must say, in terms of history, I remember Charles Krauthammer saying me once. When history looks back at this period, the way that we deal with animals, and eat animals, and put them in --

PERINO: He wasn't talking about pets. Krauthammer love dogs.

WILLIAMS: Oh, no, no.

PERINO: Read the book. He's got a whole column about dogs.

WILLIAMS: In close -- it's the fact of the way we treat animals is not going to be viewed very well.

GUTFELD: Factory farming.

WILLIAMS: Right, there you go.

PERINO: But that's not pets.

GUTFELD: I agree. I know.

WILLIAMS: Animals. It's animals.

COMPAGNO: All right, second topic, just how many bad hair days do Americans have in a year? The answer allegedly is 96. Which works out to about eight per month according to a new survey way. Weigh in if you want to.

PERINO: Well, we're not -- I mean, we shouldn't ask -- we get our hair and makeup done for us.

GUTFELD: I don't.

PERINO: I mean, Lawrence has bad hair days.

JONES: I do. I do. Because --

COMPAGNO: I can't imagine that.

JONES: I do have bad hair days because I'm (INAUDIBLE) about it. Like, I used to get haircuts twice a week.

GUTFELD: Talking about bad hair.

JONES: My hair -- my hair grows incredibly fast. This guy is a mess. And so, yes, I have better hair days all the time.

PERINO: Really?

JONES: I'm having bad hair day right now.

PERINO: No, it's like perfect all the time. What are you talking about.

JONES: I know what my ends up is supposed to be crisp in the line, and the line in my head is supposed to be crisp. So yes.

COMPAGNO: You have them all the time.

JONES: I have bad hair days a couple of times a month, but it's my back. It's interesting. All right, never mind. Anyway, anyway, we're having this discussion and there's probably people at home who are bald who are just going, shut up.


GUTFELD: I would kid everything for a bad hair day.

PERINO: I can't believe you're making fun of bald people. How dare you, Greg.

GUTFELD: By the way, you know, I'm getting older and I having more hair, isn't that bizarre?

PERINO: And it's not even coming out of your ears.

COMPAGNO: All right, finally, President Trump has made the infamous love affair between Peter Strzok and Lisa page a campaign rally staple. He even mentioned it today.


TRUMP: This is Peter to Lisa. He's probably trying to impress her for obvious reasons. There's no way he gets elected, but I'm afraid we can't take the risk.


COMPAGNO: Now, this Strzok-Page drama will be performed live at CPAC with Dean Cain and Kristy Swanson reenacting the text messages. Now, Dean Cain, he tweeted about this because he was getting kind of, you know, backlash from the left saying, aren't you just humiliating people and this is for media and laughs. He's said, no, we're doing this to expose the bias of federal investigators trying to unseat a duly elected president.

WILLIAMS: This is ridiculous, you know. I mean, I remember when people at this table said oh, why are celebrities reading the Mueller report? So now the shoes on the other foot and you're celebrating this. Oh my gosh.

GUTFELD: Can I respond to that? Because I want to -- I want to -- you made a point. That was a good point about how now politics is downstream from culture. This is evidence of that because now you're having entertainment go into politics.

JONES: You know what, I really don't care if people get -- made fun of that abuse their powers and target American citizen. I think they should be the laughingstock.

WILLIAMS: Oh, so when Mueller is --

JONES: I'm not talking about Mueller.

WILLIAMS: They should mock --

JONES: These are people that lied to the FISA Court --

WILLIAMS: They didn't lied.

JONES: -- that abused the president. Lisa suppressed evidence.

COMPAGNO: Lisa Page -- Lisa Strzok is if they -- if they legitimize their - - Dana, your thoughts?

PERINO: I don't have anything to say about it.

COMPAGNO: All right, fine, guys. "ONE MORE THING" is up next.


PERINO: Time now for "ONE MORE THING." I'm going to go first. Finny Molloy is a golden retriever. He has an affinity for tennis balls and a special talent when it comes to carrying them around. Check him out. So with no help from his human family, he can carry up to six tennis balls in his mouth at one time.

The current world record is five. Finny's mom, she's been in talks with the Guinness Book of World Records for a year trying to get his number verified in the book. While the family waits for Finley to be officially marked down in history books for his tennis ball retrieving skills, the precious pup is busy starting in his own Instagram account. You can check them out @FinnyBoyMolloy. It's pretty fun.

GUTFELD: Do you know how hard it is for me not to make a really, really bad joke?

PERINO: Yes, I know. I mean, it has been one of those shows. So just like - - hold on, one moment. also, there's a new I Tell You What podcast to talk about Iowa, New Hampshire Democrats and Impeachment, all sorts of stuff.

GUTFELD: It's not fair.

PERINO: Do you want to make the joke?

GUTFELD: No, because I want to keep my job.

PERINO: OK, Juan, you're next.

WILLIAMS: Yes, we want you. We want you. All right, if you get this question, right, you can have five seconds to pick up whatever you want at a Bronx corner store. Take a look.


UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Seven times seven plus 10?




WILLIAMS: Yes. Ahmed Alwan, the son of the store's owner is asking math questions of his customers. If they get it right, they get a mini shopping spree. Ahmed said, his dad isn't worried about giving away too much food or he says it's all going to come out of the son's paycheck. The customer's five-second frenzy has made the store into a real-life version of the old T.V. show (INAUDIBLE).

By the way, here is my favorite winner. He nailed the question and then as you see, he just pulled a row of lottery tickets. Fast thinking.

COMPAGNO: Brilliant.

JONES: I like that.

PERINO: All right, Greg.

GUTFELD: I don't know how I feel about that. It's so weird. But I guess it's good. OK, what am I doing? This. What's with the animal noises? All right, you know, when I like to take a bath, I like to make faux hawk out of foam. It makes the time go fast. Like this little fella here. Check out this fuzzy little ferret and with his little faux hawk. Can you get any more adorable than that little guy? Emily?

COMPAGNO: No, you can't.

GUTFELD: No, you can't. Yes.

PERINO: You just can't. You absolutely can't.

GUTFELD: That is my hygiene tip today.

PERINO: Put a foam hat on your head.

WILLIAMS: He don't look so happy.

PERINO: All right, Lawrence.

JONES: You know what I like? A good high five, and so does this little boy right here. This is a three-year-old. He's an Atlanta Hawks fan. And here he is high fiving the entire team that are running on the -- running on the court to play the Boston Celtics. Look at him. And he just has enough.

GUTFELD: He better not have the flu.

JONES: Look at this kid.

PERINO: Wash your hands, everybody.

JONES: He just loves it. I think he's a great member for the team.

PERINO: Kids have germs.

GUTFELD: Kids have germs.

PERINO: Allison, our stage manager is disgusted with me right now. I better go with Emily. You're next.

COMPAGNO: OK, I have a totally amazing "ONE MORE THING" about one of those unlikely friendships. So this -- like open space cam caught this adorable coyote and badger best friend duo. Look, he's like, come on, let's go. And then they go off hunting together. It's totally fox and the hound.

GUTFELD: How do you know that?

PERINO: Because they -- because apparently, this is known in nature that they do --

GUTFELD: This was a setup.


GUTFELD: This has happened to me. This has happened to me. You go into what -- I'm buying something in an alley, and I never go back.

COMPAGNO: Oh my gosh, it's so cute.

JONES: He was waiting for him.

COMPAGNO: Totally. He was like hey --

PERINO: He was like, come on, come on. Because he wants his help.

GUTFELD: They better not be doing anything --

JONES: So they just --

COMPAGNO: They're going to rob a bank for sure.

GUTFELD: That's against nature if they're doing anything else back there, because what kind of child will they have.

PERINO: What do you mean?

COMPAGNO: A cute one?

GUTFELD: No, it'll be a mutant.

COMPAGNO: They're adorable.

WILLIAMS: Is this what you said was going to happen in the village?


PERINO: I bet.

GUTFELD: I would --

PERINO: I bet that right now, Bret Baier is so excited talking about the fox and the badger and the --

GUTFELD: Bears are great.

PERINO: Yes are really great. We better go. Set your DVRs. Never ever miss an episode of this show THE FIVE. Like how could you miss it? "SPECIAL REPORT" is up next. Bret, I'm sorry. Hi, Bret.

BRET BAIER, FOX NEWS ANCHOR: I like the ferret with a Mohawk.

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