'Gutfeld!' on Biden's tough week

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Gutfeld: How can we have any confidence in our leaders?

'Gutfeld!' panel discusses the situation in Afghanistan and President Biden's response

This is a rush transcript of "Gutfeld!" on August 27, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS HOST: So, talk about a rough week. Terrorists attack the Kabul airport, killing 13 U.S. service members, 10 Marines, two Army soldiers, and one Navy corpsman.

At least 160 Afghans were killed. The mayhem believed to be carried out by the Islamic group ISIS-K. The president tried to speak, then Jen Psaki spoke. But somehow, I don't feel comforted.

The president seemed defeated, lost between spasms of anger. Then followed instructions to use a list of reporters given to him by whoever is really in charge.

And Jen was just Jen, acting as though she was doing us a favor instead of her job. A job I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. And besides Perino already was press secretary.

I go back to one question, though, how can everyone but the people in charge not see this coming? Maybe they were so busy distracting us that they got distracted while distracting us?

Look, I'm an English major magazine editor turned class clown with an obsession over unicorns, and I could see this coming. Hell, the blind shake could see this coming.

After a conference call with Helen Keller, How could the people in charge not? Perhaps they did and just assumed carnage was the price we pay. Or maybe they just underestimated the risk, which boggles the mind.

But again, I'm no expert. And yet, how do I know better? Going forward, how can we have any confidence in our leaders? I wouldn't let them leave my paintball team. They make the Bay of Pigs look well thought out.

I mean, who gives control of the airport perimeter to the Taliban as well as info on Americans? Could we have made it any easier for these medieval maggots? Oh, they will say hey, we had no choice. But when has the military with the best weapons not had a choice? Instead, they led us to a place where there was no plan B. That's not leadership. That's resignation.

And where are the resignations? Where are the firings? Maybe General Milley should put down the Robin DiAngelo and pick up the art of war. The upside no more arguments over the meaning of the word stranded. We got a good visual of that at the podium yesterday.

Biden is stranded. When really it's on the Democrats and the media. They only wanted Joe to win, but not to govern. And now he has to lead and he can't. And don't even think of impeachment. Who could replace him?

It's incredible how the woke embrace has destroyed the Democratic Party. 

You can't lead a country you think is racist while obsessing over pronouns and crackpots in Viking hats.

So, we ended up relying on the Taliban to keep us safe. That's like letting Charlie Manson babysit your kids.

It reminds me of the Portland mayor who decided to make peace with Antifa while shafting the cops. We chose a regime that stones women to death for showing too much ankle at the expense of our troops.

So, why so many smart people making bad decisions? Well, maybe they're not that smart. Or maybe politics polluted their decision-making, driven by a still fresh loathing of Trump or our country itself.

Having to get out by the end of August was a political choice, a self- induced deadline with the emphasis on dead. Not providing adequate security? Another political choice. We couldn't have that many troops there, right? That's bad optics they thought.

Well, I got worse optics. A target with more sitting ducks than a decoy factory. Remember how under Trump it was a new crisis every day, every hour. CNN told us the walls were closing in. From the Steele dossier to the tax returns, and every phony scandal in between.

Those scandals were the good old days. High caloric low nutrition, outrage, junk food, Compare and contrast to now, Kabul is the real deal, real horror, real scandal, a blind consensus of sheer incompetence.

So what do we do? Well, I'm no military general, but then again, does that matter? We must take responsibility for our people over there, get them all out, and obliterate those responsible for the bombings. And when we're done, we can decide what to do with Joe and the rest of that clown car.

Think about this, after committing 20 years to one effort. We accepted the very opposite of that effort quickly and without looking back. Like a husband who tells his wife and kids that he's going out for cigarettes only to never return. Leaving his loved ones vulnerable and unprotected. Someone should pay for that.

But in the meantime, I don't want to hear -- about January 6th, climate change, mask mandates, or voter suppression, or whenever gassy, stupid political theatre you're trying to peddle until you figure out how to get us out of this mess.

But maybe asking them for help to get us out is as stupid as relying on the Taliban for the same thing.

ANNOUNCER: Period!

GUTFELD: Let's welcome tonight's guest.

He is so white. He thinks oatmeal is ethnic food. Fox News contributor Tom Shillue.

He is the second most popular Joe on the show. Writer, comedian Joe DeVito.

He is the third most popular Joe on the show. Comedian Joe Machi.

And the first thing she does when she wakes up is thank the gardener for mowing around her. Fox News contributor Kat Joe Timpf.

All right. So, Tom, how did you -- how did you feel after listening to Biden's speech? Did it -- did you feel confident in his abilities to lead us?

TOM SHILLUE, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: Well, it was similar to most of his press conferences. He was completely out of it. That image that you showed, it's so -- the most interesting thing about that image is really -- not the image itself, it's that he couldn't answer the question.

GUTFELD: Right.

SHILLUE: So, Joe does things when he can't answer the question, sometimes he laughs. It's always inappropriate. Sometimes his laughter, sometimes he buries his head in his hand. Sometimes he says, come on, man. But the thing was -- the amazing thing, if you search this on Google, and you look around, the mainstream media, the way they wrote about that image, which is I mean, we're not going to forget that image, he was stuck, he didn't know what to do.

GUTFELD: Yes.

SHILLUE: They said things like -- Washington Post said, Biden shows frustration with reporter, obviously an emotional moment for (INAUDIBLE). 

It wasn't an emotionable, he couldn't answer the question.

And the thing is, if you -- even if that's your interpretation that Biden was showing frustration with a reporter, that's not a story.

GUTFELD: Right.

SHILLUE: The story is he can't answer the question.

GUTFELD: Yes, yes.

SHILLUE: So, that were he was.

GUTFELD: Not good -- not good.

Joe, I -- my defense, which I had there briefly in the monologue is that it really isn't Joe's fault, because it was the Democrats and the media who just wanted he -- thought that he was the best chance to win despite his decline in faculties and his inability to lead.

So, they put him forward. They said we'll worry about leading later, we'll put him in there.

So, isn't this more on the Democrats and the media who pushed him there? 

Not so much this befuddled sad man?

JOE DEVITO, WRITER AND COMEDIAN: Well, he's definitely a befuddled, sad, man. But before that, he was an obnoxious blowhard for about 40 years or so.

GUTFELD: That is true. I still correct it.

DEVITO: Yes, Keep in mind -- yes, I have as much confidence he's going to lead us out of this thing. He couldn't -- he couldn't lead Andrew Cuomo to ladies' night. That's how out of (INAUDIBLE).

He's pathetic, and I see the amount of spin they're trying to put on this. 

They are really losing touch with reality. Because if they're trying to say, well, we had to get out of Afghanistan eventually. OK, I think almost everyone agrees with that.

GUTFELD: No one disagrees. Yes.

DEVITO: In hindsight, we probably could have gotten out of there. In 2006 -

- 

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: Because I really think the only nation building we should do as a nation that's located between Mexico and Canada.

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: We don't need to mess with these other countries.

GUTFELD: Right.

DEVITO: But it's a difference between saying you're on a bus and we need to turn around, you apply the brake, you pull over. You don't veer off the road and smash into a brick wall.

GUTFELD: Right.

DEVITO: And say, but I stopped the bus, isn't that what you want it?

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: So, what we're seeing it's not a failure of our troops. It's not even -- I hate to say this, I don't even think I can blame the Taliban. 

They're doing exactly what they've always done.

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: It's the people were supposed to be in charge of this country. And when Obama was quoted as saying, don't underestimate Joe's ability to f things up, I think we're just seeing the beginning of that.

GUTFELD: Yes. To use an old adage, you can't blame the frog for what the scorpion does to the frog.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Yes.

GUTFELD: I don't even know what that means.

DEVITO: It sounds French.

GUTFELD: I got that off -- I got that off of a crackerjack.

No, Joe, I don't know what your feelings are towards Donald Trump, good or bad. But -- I'm asking you to hypothesize. Would he have done this?

JOE MACHI, STAND-UP COMEDIAN: It's a tough question to answer.

GUTFELD: Yes.

MACHI: But it is weird to hear Joe Biden say I'm stuck by that May 1st deadline that Trump negotiated to withdraw. But by my calendar, it's late August.

GUTFELD: Yes. True.

MACHI: So, it's also a weird situation to me because I got fired from telemarketing for being too polite.

GUTFELD: Yes. Amazing.

MACHI: Yes, it seems like the Washington generals have more success against the Harlem Globetrotters than the generals in Washington have success in anything. They never seem to lose their job.

And it seems like when they create a disaster, and then I turn on a lot of mainstream media, and it's the same people that were involved in creating this disaster that they're like, hey, how should we get out of this disaster? This is like there's no consequences ever.

GUTFELD: Yes. And Biden was part of the disaster for eight years. And he pretends like he was always against this, and you can. -- It's not that hard to find tape of him talking about nation-building.

(CROSSTALK)

MACHI: Well, it's -- 

GUTFELD: Don't -- you just type in Google, about Joe Biden nation-building.

MACHI: You can even go back in much more recent history too where he said that the Taliban wasn't going to take over and this wouldn't look like Saigon.

GUTFELD: Yes, yes. Yes.

MACHI: Yes.

KATHERINE TIMPF, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR (voice-over): Yes.

GUTFELD: Wrong on both counts, Kat. So, you hosted a radio program today in which one of your callers was your husband, a veteran who spent time in Afghanistan?

TIMPF:: Yes.

GUTFELD: Any wisdom to be shared with us?

TIMPF: Yes. Wisdom all from him, not me. But he's -- it's been really crazy watching him watch all of this for the past few days. Starting with before the horrible things that happened yesterday, just seeing troops and Taliban like standing next to each other. 

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: He said when he was there in 2012, Taliban were like ghosts. And the way he put it was we never saw the whites of their eyes until after we shot them dead.

GUTFELD: Right.

TIMPF: And going back to the generals and the -- and the leadership, he's saying that, you know, when he was there was sort of the end of the time period where it was really a combat operation.

So, he was wondering if those troops who lost their lives had ever even seen combat before this. If they were not trained properly.

He said there was basically things like spread out, and this, and that, as the court, it's not their fault. But all of this, there should have been time for that training. They just let, you know, these guys were sitting ducks, all for the sake of a symbolic deadline for political points.

GUTFELD: Yes, that's all it was. To get it so that Joe had something to say on 9/11.

(CROSSTALK)

TIMPF: Yes.

GUTFELD: The 20th anniversary.

I love -- one thing I say before we go to break. I love how the media is saying, you shouldn't be talking about impeachment because that cheapens the whole process.

The media that had pushed for two impeachments. One, based on a phone call. 

And in this case, anybody talking about impeachment is talking about it based on a rage over the death of Americans.

But talking about it in that vein, that just cheapens impeachment, but about that perfect phone call -- all right, up next, a bonus monologue. A professor says mask protests are racist without a factual basis.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Time for -- 

ANNOUNCER: "THIS PANDEMIC IS MAKING US STUPID!"

GUTFELD: It is. For example, first, you got Oregon's governor mandating a statewide outdoor mask mandate outdoors. It's not sure if it's for COVID or for the pepper spray.

Either way, there's no science to back that up unless tyranny is considered science. Fact is the politicians want to cover your face to cover their asses.

Meanwhile, I'd like to cover their face with my ass. Figuratively. 

Figuratively.

Meanwhile, you got hysteria in Australia as the media and police chase down quarantine breakers. This is in a country where the national bird is beer.

So, hysteria is now a virus. We don't need a shot of Moderna, we need a shot of valium. But this is driven by a denial of reality and risk. If you believe we must do everything to reduce the risk to zero, then every freedom is up for grabs. Unless you're the Obamas party planner.

True, we could probably get COVID death down to zero. We could also get car fatalities to zero too. You want to avoid traffic accidents completely? 

Pass a unicycle mandate. That make Tom happy.

But this pandemic is really messing with the racists. Like Hakeem Jefferson, a Stanford professors spit out a bunch of tweets, claiming protesters of school mask mandates were doing so due to their whiteness. 

Some snippets, "Make no mistake, the crazy opposition to mask-wearing, you can't disconnect it from whiteness."

He adds, "It's not just cause these white folks are GOP. It's cause they're white, and believe whiteness confers upon them a kind of a power that places them above government action." That's nonsense.

Then, Jefferson tweets, "whiteness be working overtime." Like we say in the south, the devil is busy.

Now, if I didn't know any better, I'd say he just compared white people to the devil.

Which is impossible because I do not do well in the heat. Jefferson also says that people of color can be committed to whiteness. That's his way of addressing any black parent who also dare question mask mandates or critical race theory or voting Republican.

Every black who disagrees with him, he Uncle Tom's, claiming they're people of color attracted to their oppressors.

No wonder the L.A. Times can freely call Larry Elder, a successful black man, now the face of white supremacy. Elders running for a California Governor against a white liberal who's turned that state -- literally. 

Watch your step tourists.

California's official export is hobo poop. Now, there is a new Ben and Jerry's flavor. Chunky hobo poop.

Meanwhile, NFL legend Herschel Walker -- Herschel -- it was like he's a Sex in the City character. Herschel! Herschel Walker is running for senate as a Republican. Now, I doubt, Jefferson would spew this nonsense to Walker primarily to his face. Instead, he'll probably just start an online petition to take his Heisman away.

ANNOUNCER: Period!

GUTFELD: Joe, what's your assessment of it being a racist practice to be resisting mask mandates?

MACHI: Change the record. If they just running out of stuff to blame on racism. None of this makes any sense anymore. You have people who are vaccinated saying the unvaccinated are putting them at risk. But if they're vaccinated, and the vaccine works -- 

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: What are you talking about?

GUTFELD: Yes.

MACHI: It's not about science anymore. It's a game of Simon says, and I was always awful at that game because they would say stuff like Simon says pat your head, and I would say, well, -- that guy. I (INAUDIBLE)

And then I would -- I would lose because then the teacher would say pat your head, and I would pat my head because that's the teacher, they're in charge.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: Yes.

I had a really interesting response. But now I could really lost my train of thought. Thank you, Joe, for that. Kat, it will come back to me. Can Oregon be saved?

TIMPF: No.

GUTFELD: OK, then let's add -- Let's talk about you being a racist.

TIMPF: Yes, right. Exactly. That's what -- here is the thing. Follow the science. They say follow the science. I agree. Love science. I think it's good to follow science. But then I hear them saying, hey if you'd like an opinion on how well your child can breathe when they go to the school that you pay for with your taxes, that's white supremacy. I think that doesn't sound like science. To me -- 

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: No.

TIMPF: It doesn't make any sense. So, I just -- and what is it -- what's the benefit of that? You know, why don't you just try to help it?

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: Do something helpful.

GUTFELD: But, you know, professors, they don't have anything to do but come up with -- right?

TIMPF: Yes.

GUTFELD: And it's like he got -- he was a -- those tweets got him more attention than anything he's ever written at Stanford. Stanford sucks. And I don't say that as a Berkeley graduate. I'm just saying Stanford sucks.

You know what, Joe, here's an interesting fact. Joe DeVito. Show that the CDC did this massive study. 90,000 kids have the notes here. It happened in Georgia, 169 schools, they found statistically insignificant differences between schools requiring kids to wear masks and those who didn't. But they didn't include that in the report summary. Isn't that weird?

DEVITO: It's not surprising. Well, you know, if all this is following the science, I think we should give witchcraft a shot.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: Yes.

DEVITO: It's much more consistent, and -- 

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: And t's fun.

DEVITO: And it's fun.

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: There's like fun rituals, recipes

GUTFELD: You got to loot for -- you got to loot for newts. Newts, right? 

Because, if you know -- if you -- every good witch has a newt in their broth.

SHILLUE: Yes.

MACHI: Yes.

DEVITO: Unless it's a Newt Gingrich.

GUTFELD: No.

DEVITO: Very clear.

GUTFELD: By the way, you know, he got a lot of crap for that name. Oh, here comes Newt.

DEVITO: I know, because the -- 

GUTFELD: Where is Newt -- where is Newton?

DEVITO: Like, the full version is much better.

This professor, I think is great. I think we -- I think we can say with confidence now that when someone says make no mistake, there's some real mistaken stuff (INAUDIBLE). It's kind of like when someone says, let me be clear, there's some vague stuff on the horizon.

GUTFELD: Right.

DEVITO: Yes.

GUTFELD: That's what Biden does, the let me be clear thing. I think it's always like a warm-up to something that he isn't sure is going to come next.

TIMPF: Obama did that.

GUTFELD: Yes, yes.

DEVITO: Yes, of course. They do it. That's the politician equivalent of when someone goes to tell you something when they look around first.

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: Well, there's a really hot one coming up next.

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: I think with this professor, it's time for us to embrace this expanded definition of whiteness. Because it also -- what isn't whiteness with these guys?

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: It includes successful blacks.

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: It includes high performing Asian students.

GUTFELD: Right.

DEVITO: It pretty much includes anyone who's smart and puts in hard work. 

So, everyone is the most inclusive thing, this side of a resort where you get to drink for free.

GUTFELD: Yes. I mean, the fact is, if you're talking about rebellion or resistance, and you call that whiteness, that's a -- that's a compliment to whiteness. And what if you actually wear your mask? He could actually say, well, that's whiteness too.

Like, everything he could -- like, if every -- imagine if it were reversed, and there are white parents there -- you've got to wear your mask! Because typical white people telling people what to do.

Instead, you have white people saying, don't -- you don't have to wear masks, because he's not typical whiteness. That is a hack.

DEVITO: Well, it shows you what racism has become there. Racism now, they define it as Republican parents don't want to wear masks, whereas, 50 years ago, racism was Democrats wearing hoods.

GUTFELD: Yes, exactly.

DEVITO: So, let's take a look at the history here.

GUTFELD: Yes. Speaking of white, Tom, you're wearing your white pants.

SHILLUE: Yes.

GUTFELD: Either that or you're not wearing any pants.

SHILLUE: Sure.

GUTFELD: Because you are really white. Yes.

You -- I always have to give Tom credit for this.

SHILLUE: Thank you.

GUTFELD: Usually, I -- 

(CROSSTALK)

SHILLUE: Let's move on. I got the credit I need.

GUTFELD: You were the first person that told me that the mask thing was going to be one of the biggest issues of next year.

SHILLUE: Yes.

GUTFELD: Remember you said that to me, and I yelled at you. I said shut up, Tom! Because you were giving me a massage.

(CROSSTALK)

SHILLUE: Because I know -- 

GUTFELD: And I -- you know, when I get a massage, I do not like people talking politics to me.

TIMPF: Fair.

GUTFELD: And you started talking about the mask mandate.

SHILLUE: Yes. And I have very strong hands too.

GUTFELD: You do (INAUDIBLE).

SHILLUE: But the -- because it was about control, I knew was about control. 

And this is what they do, this is -- and thank you for saying we can't really get to zero COVID, but that's where people want to go now.

GUTFELD: Right.

SHILLUE: And it's not just in New Zealand and Australia, they want to go to zero COVID. At the beginning of this, they said well, there's no possibility we're going to go to zero COVID.

But, they know they can't get to zero COVID, but they want to keep the controls in there. That's why it makes people like myself angry. I don't -- look, we're learning a lot about this, but we don't seem to actually be learning it, whether it's health interventions, whether it's economic interventions, we just talked about Afghanistan, military interventions.

Most of what government does, they screw it up.

GUTFELD: This is also -- I know we have to go. Brings up the lie of consensus. So, what would Biden -- when he was backed up against the wall and said there was a consensus of military experts.

People don't understand that consensus works in reverse. They find a solution, then they go around and they get the people to as -- to become part of the consensus. If you -- if I go to Joe, you agree with me? He says yes, Kat says yes, you say yes, but Tom says no. He is not part of the consensus.

SHILLUE: Yes.

GUTFELD: So, do you know he did -- he's no longer counted. So, when they say it's a consensus of climate change, remember the consensus on climate change? You find it that was never true. The science is never settled. The science is never settled.

Where am I? Now, remember what I was going to say to you, Joe, but it's not worth it.

Up next, one mascot that offends and another that gender Ben.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Will the Leprechaun soon be gone? It's an earth shattering

question: should an Irish mascot with angry fists no longer exists? A survey by a sports apparel company. Wow, that's where I get all my surveys. 

Calls a Notre Dame Fighting Irish Leprechaun, the fourth most offensive mascot in the country, finishing just ahead of the Topeka State Puppy Poisoners. I don't see the problem there. 

Apparently, it caused enough outrage among fans that the company took the survey results down from its Web site. The top three offensive mascots were Florida State's Osceola. Is that what it is? And Renegade San Diego State's Aztec warrior. That's when the producers go silent. They don't tell you -- no, I don't know what it is. And Hawaii's vile -- Villy, the warrior. I would like to be called a warrior. 

As for the Leprechaun, critics referred to him as a disparaging symbol of Irish Catholics. But the school pushback saying there's no comparison to their mascot and the indigenous Warner's use worriers used by other institutions. Speaking of other schools, the new school, which is a private college in New York, has redesigned their mascot to be a gender neutral social justice warrior named Narls Narwhal. 

Narls holds a dual degree in Communications and Environmental Studies, which actually accurately mirrors new school students by having no employable skills. One thing new school is right about, you don't need to be good at sports to have a mascot. Tomorrow we go to our new gut Feld mascot, Ulysses, the unicorn. Ulysses, tell us about yourself.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP) 

JOE MACHI, COMEDIAN: People keep telling me that unicorns aren't real. No dog. If there were a such thing as flying horses with weapons attached to their heads, do you think they'd be doing very well around humans? And we'd be apex predators. You want to know how humans treat apex predators? Ask a tiger Greg if you can find any. And I'm sick and tired of kids thinking I'm the role model. I've been divorced twice. I barely get to see my own kids. 

Toughest job to pay alimony fee which -- go GUTFELD.

(END VIDEO CLIP) 

GUTFELD: Yes. I tell him to get some counseling, but I don't think he can afford it. 

MACHI: I cannot. 

GUTFELD: Machi with this, OK, so that's this. Patrick -- St. Patrick's Day mascot, whatever. that is such a made up, did you follow this story at all? 

It was like -- why would apparel like I don't get why this had to be made an issue over something that really doesn't exist?

MACHI: It's a big distraction which colleges need right now. Instead of talking about how they charge a ton of money in something that's supposed to be progressive, it seems like it, it creates more inequality than anything else. And then you have a whole bunch of majors that have no employable skills when these kids graduate. 

So, you're like, you know what, let's talk about the mascot more than any of that. I was just surprised because I thought the Fighting Irish mascot would be canceled because he was a straight white Christian.

GUTFELD: I like him because he's my height. You're Irish, Joe. 

JOE DEVITO, COMEDIAN: Oh, don't even. 

GUTFELD: Oh, DeVito. Please, Joe DeVito, sorry. Is that offensive, that mascot? Or is it -- I find GNarwhal more offensive?

DEVITO: I think the Fighting Irish Mascot is wonderful. I mean, he's a little green alcoholic. With his fists up. Who's he fighting? He doesn't know. 

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: He's fighting a battle with substance abuse. I think schools need to lean into their ethnic stereotype.

GUTFELD: Right? 

DEVITO: Because look at this stupid Narwhal. 

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: What's the -- the Narwhal is the whole thing you know a Narwhal four, is that tusk, that horn.

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: Which is only the males. So, what are they going to say, like, I don't know what? He's a narwhal, but he's now he's just glad to see you. Is that what? It's so stupid. 

GUTFELD: Also, you can't hire a female narwhal. So, it's immediately innately sexist because you've got the, it's got to have the little horn. 

DEVITO: It has to have the horn. 

GUTFELD: Yes.

DEVITO: I don't even know what that is. 

GUTFELD: I don't know what it is. 

DEVITO: Yes. 

GUTFELD: You know, you cut it off and you ground it up. 

DEVITO: That's really good. Those weak moments. 

GUTFELD: Yes, and very weak moments. Tom, I have a, I think that the best mascot would be a wokadilee. A wokadile is a crocodile that eats everybody including his supporters last.

TOM SHILLUE, COMEDIAN: I like that Greg. I've never -- look, I'm the Irish guy, Greg, and I don't -- I never like this Fighting Irish. First of all, he doesn't look like he's going to win the fight. He's tiny. He's skinny. 

And he's like, this doesn't, you can't fight like this. It's never worked. 

GUTFELD: Didn't Popeye, didn't he fight like that? 

SHILLUE: After the spinach though he was. 

GUTFELD: Yes.

SHILLUE: But they -- narwhal, I think that he's not interesting. 

GUTFELD: They.

SHILLUE: It's a they, you're right. It's not interesting. And it's not because of the genderless it's not because of the social justice warrior. 

It's that he's just boring. He doesn't seem to have any overriding qualities. Even Barney, the Dinosaur, who he resembles, at least he loved you, he loved me, he loved being in a happy family and he would, he was very excitable.

GUTFELD: Right? Barney was like he was so psyched. That's why I loved Barney. He would jump up and down just for counting to three.

KAT TIMPF, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: He's always telling me to clean up. 

GUTFELD: Yes. Didn't Barney also get Me Too-ed.

TIMPF: I don't know.

GUTFELD: Wasn't there a guy inside Barney?

SHILLUE: Because he hugged. He loved contact. 

GUTFELD: Yes, he was like the Joe Biden of mascots or morning cartoon whatevers. Kat, you know what, who needs mascots anyway, right?

TIMPF: Right. 

GUTFELD: You know what, let's throw the mascots to the woke wolves. Just have them like, good, you got that one? Let him go. Leave us alone. 

TIMPF: Yes, and this is like some huge deal like, Oh, this isn't a gender neutral mascot, like are a lot of mascots are gender neutral? Like we don't really get to know them that well. 

GUTFELD: Yes. 

TIMPF: Because of they're mascots.

GUTFELD: You know, we should do to your point, we should demand to see the genitals of every mascot, and then count which one's male which one's female? 

DEVITO: There's, there's conventions for that. 

TIMPF: Yes. 

GUTFELD: I think that, that -- because like we don't know that see, how can we solve a problem if we don't know what the problem is? 

TIMPF: Yes, they don't really talk to us about that. They just go --

GUTFELD: Oski, the bear, which is Cal Berkeley, is one of the most hideous looking mascots you'll ever see. It's just a bear in his sweater. I don't know if it's a male or female or what it is. And I you know, I, I hung out with that bear for a while. Heard some thoughts with him. Speaking in California, Newsome hopes his recall ends with help from the rich, fancy friend.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: He hopes that celebrity backing will stop the push to send him packing. You win some, you lose some but in Hollywood, not if you're Gavin Newsom. Oh, nice. According to the Hollywood Reporter, some guy, California Gavin Newsom has been reaching out to everyone from Snoop Dogg to Stephen Spielberg, begging them to donate money or post on social media to help stop the recall effort. 

Some, like John Legend, he's on the left known as Chrissy Tiegen's husband; and a legend comedian George Lopez have already started posting on Newsom's behalf. But an interview on CNN, three non-celebrity democrats say that life in LA has become so bad under Newsom that they want to recall citing problems such as wildfires, crime, cost of living, and of course, homelessness.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP) 

MICHELLE HEISETH, REGISTERED DEMOCRAT: It's like let me work let me pay my taxes, but provide me with safety and not be accosted by two homeless people within the matter of 15 minutes. 

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Is this governor Newsom's fault?

ALISA SANDOVAL, REGISTERED DEMOCRAT: I think, I mean, technically, how can I even answer that? He's the leader. It's everything starts from the top.

(END VIDEO CLIP) 

GUTFELD: Nerve of those women to not accept being accosted by people without homes. Talk about house privilege. Certainly, John Legend in his well-fortified mansion will be more impactful than these ladies who are clearly being total divas. And who doesn't love John's music?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP) 

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: John Legend, whoo!

(END VIDEO CLIP) 

GUTFELD: That wasn't John Legend. Or was it tune in for our brand new special tomorrow. John Legend, has he lost it? Or not? Kat, thoughts on anything?

TIMPF: I just hate all the choices being presented between, oh, this governor who, who likes COVID rules, and a governor who doesn't because Gavin Newsom doesn't follow his own COVID rules.

GUTFELD: Right. 

TIMPF: It's difference between somebody who would let you live your life the way they're living their own life and someone who thinks that different rules should apply to you. And I just, California is a disaster, who could, who could think that, that's good?

GUTFELD: Yes. Apparently, Gavin doesn't mind and neither do his rich friends, Tom. 

SHILLUE: That's right. 

GUTFELD: You think Elder has a chance? I think he does. 

SHILLUE: I think he does. And I think people are -- people get psyched up about these recalls. But I love them. And I'm wondering why it's only in California that this happens. I want all recalls everywhere. In fact, elections from now on should be only recalls. You're elected -- see, we tried term limits.

GUTFELD: Right.

SHILLUE: That doesn't really work, and then we know once you get in there, it's so hard to get rid of them. How about this. Once you're elected, you serve until we recall you. Yes, you know --

GUTFELD: You kind of like talking about what they do in England and Canada. 

Where they actually -- you can just call for an election.

SHILLUE: I love that. 

GUTFELD: Yes, they just call for election; sometimes politicians will do it to themselves, because they're doing so well. I think, you know?

SHILLUE: You know what I want to do, dissolve the government. They're always like, we're going to dissolve our government. Why can't we do that?

GUTFELD: Yes, exactly. We're shutting down, we're done. Nothing to see here, Joe. Joe, what do you, what do you make of the race in general? And I don't mean the white race. I know you're --

DEVITO: White race. Keep up the good work. I think Gavin Newsom should be getting ready for his next job, which is going to be the lead in American Psycho, the musical born to play that role. 

GUTFELD: He was. 

DEVITO: If Larry Elder's the face of white supremacy in California, Gavin Newsom is the butt. Because he's done such a terrible job, but -- and what better way to appeal to the common man is if being maskless in the French Laundry wasn't enough. Hitting up your buddy, Steven Spielberg for some cash. I think we can all relate to that. So, yes, I think Tom's right. I want on our elected officials to live in a constant state of terror that they're on their way out the door.

GUTFELD: You know, it's -- the appeal to Hollywood tells you something that the only people he can get money from, are the people that are unaffected by all those issues, right. So if you're, if you're a rich Hollywood actor, actress, you don't have to deal with the homelessness. You don't have to deal with the crime or the inflation or the price -- or the poor, or the prep the prices of real estate. So, he's seeking, he's seeking to be saved by the people not impacted by the problems, which is pretty, pretty, pretty gross, Mr. Machi, Mr. Gross. 

MACHI: This is like the streets in San Diego. He got to watch out for the hepatitis over there. 

GUTFELD: Yes.

MACHI: But I'll tell you this. It's interesting, because if you vote yes, on the recall, and Gavin Newsom loses that, then Larry Elder gets a 22 percent you could have a person that isn't very popular statewide running the state. It's almost like California has a law that had some unintended negative consequences.

GUTFELD: You know, it's funny, only if Elder were a Democrat the media would be doing -- this is potentially the first black governor of California. 

TIMPF: Right? 

GUTFELD: How odd that that story is not being written at all because he's a Republican. So, it's not that it's not something to blow your horn about or get blacks to vote, right? It's just horrible, the hypocrisy. I had to say that. Up next, we explore the reasons why topless sunbathers have become so shy.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Did rude dudes turn French sunbathers prude? Time for. 

ANNOUNCER: "THE WAR ON FRENCH WOMEN SUNBATHING TOPLESS." 

GUTFELD: This is possibly bigger than the war on Christmas. I mean, I don't know but it could be. It's the story "SPECIAL REPORTS" still refuses to cover. A recent poll finds that the number of French women sunbathing topless has hit a 40-year low. Thanks, Obama. 

Apparently just 90 percent of French women son baby topless nowadays, compared to 40 percent in 1984, when Kat was only 20. Among the reasons they're choosing to cover up, 46 percent said they worry about being secretly photographed and posted on social media. Another 48 percent were worried about being harassed by men; and 53 percent said they worry about skin cancer, which makes sense you shouldn't remain unprotected in the sun for long periods of time. 

We here at GUTFELD support the efforts in prudence sunbathing. I myself no longer sunbathe topless, but bottomless? That's another story. Am I right, Tom Shillue? Party. Yes! You're prepared for that, weren't you? Damn it. 

DeVito, this is the, this is the, this is a problem. 

DEVITO: It's a big one. 

GUTFELD: It's a big problem. 

DEVITO: Well, I didn't know that there was a war on French topless sunbathing. But if there is, I imagine the French will be capitulating within 48 hours. I don't think those women -- you know what those women should need is some vitamin D. And by vitamin D, if you know what I mean.

GUTFELD: Yes, is? 

DEVITO: Well, my last name ends with a D and I'm implying I have medicinal properties. 

GUTFELD: Vitamin DeVito. 

TIMPF: You're one who they're worried about then. 

DEVITO: I am too much exposure for that vitamin D, yes. It is strange to think of all the things in our culture that have gotten more open and yes, you're right. They should not be harassed for being topless anymore than you or I should be harassed for being bottomless. But tell that to the fascist at Applebee's. 

GUTFELD: Yes, exactly. I always lay like a napkin down before I sit. 

DEVITO: It's the least you can do.

GUTFELD: Joe. Joe, you know what it is? It's all about, it's part of the entire loss of privacy that we got from social media, right? Everybody's doing this now. They're always putting their phone at you. I don't blame them for covering up their privates or publics.

MACHI: It's made my jobs and official bikini inspector far more difficult than it was in the past. And I'll say this, I don't, I don't sunbathe topless. In fact, I wear t shirts. So, when someone says take your shirt off, I do. And then we all have a laugh when they see the second shirt.

GUTFELD: Kat, what, what is it about certain countries or cultures where they accept certain things that other ones don't? Like, it's like, America, you don't see this, but you see it in other countries? What explains that?

TIMPF: I guess stuff is just different in different places. 

GUTFELD: Well done. 

TIMPF: I although I got to say, I don't understand sunbathing in general. 

GUTFELD: It is weird. 

TIMPF: I don't get it. Everyone's like, let's go to the beach. Let's go to the beach. So, I'm like, fine, and I get there. It's like, OK, but what do we do here? 

GUTFELD: Right. 

TIMPF: What do you do at the beach? 

GUTFELD: You play a little paddle ball. 

TIMPF: What -- sports? 

GUTFELD: No, you, you get up. You know what you do? You sit down for a little bit. Then you get up and you walk towards the water. Oh, it's cold. 

Then you come back.

TIMPF: Yes. You want me to travel an hour and a half to do that? I could do that in the bathtub.

GUTFELD: That is true. That is true. You know, Tom, we were talking earlier about how you're away ahead on the mask controversy. This is kind of a similar to the mask, we're talking about restricting people's freedoms not to not to wear a covering. Do you see this becoming a huge controversy in the ensuing months or years? 

SHILLUE: I see it exploding, Greg. 

GUTFELD: Yes. 

SHILLUE: You know, the thing is the Why are they insecure about being nude on the internet? They're nude in the world. Great. I would think people who are shy who want privacy, they don't go nude. 

GUTFELD: Yes. 

SHILLUE: But I bet this is happening in all different professions. Like, there used to be a lot of you know, flashers when I was a kid. 

GUTFELD: Oh, remember that? 

SHILLUE: Nobody's flashing anymore because it'd be like, hey, privacy here. 

Privacy. Don't put me on the Internet. 

GUTFELD: However, it's still going on in the subways. It's like a common thing on the subway. I've been asked to leave on a number of occasions. All right, don't go away. We'll be right back.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Out of time. Thanks to Tom Shillue, Joe DeVito, Joe Machi Kat Timpf, our studio audience. "FOX NEWS @ NIGHT" is next. I'm Greg Gutfeld. I love you America. Joe DeVito is at (INAUDIBLE).

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