Gillette attempts to score points with social justice warriors in new ad on toxic masculinity

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Gillette attempts to score points with social justice warriors in new ad on toxic masculinity

Should those who keep us shaven lecture men on misbehaving?

This is a rush transcript from "The Greg Gutfeld Show," January 19, 2019. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

GREG GUTFELD, HOST: All right, just another slow week in Trumpville. Let's start with the meal that made the media squeal.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP: We have pizzas. We have 300 hamburgers, many, many French fries.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Many, many French fries. That seems like a year ago, but the media lost their lunch over this, enraged at Trump for serving food everyone on Earth loves to eat. Think about it? How many times have you had to go to some formal event and plan what you're going to eat after you eat? Because the first dinner sucks. It's always like some tiny bird on a plate - all bones and veins. It's like you're eating an old lady's fist.

Trump's been there many times. He thought, "Hey, what would I eat after I ate?" Of course, burgers and pizza. It's what we all want, yet people lost their minds. Mainly over this.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

TRUMP: Do we have no food for you? Because we have a shutdown or do we give you some little quick salads that the First Lady will make along with Second Lady. They'll make some salads and I said you guys aren't into salads.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: It's true. Nobody is into salads. Nobody. I mean, has anyone ever on death row, ever asked for their last meal to be a chef salad? It's always burgers and pizza. Making it the gold standard for everyone, but CNN went for the sexist angle.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

JOAN WALSH, POLITICAL ANALYST, CNN: That's appalling. It seems to me like the President will not be happy until there is not one single female Republican voter in the country. It's incredibly sexist. We aren't all here to make salads for men.

ERIN BURNETT, ANCHOR, CNN: This is one of those things where sometimes what people say when they're being funny exposes exactly who they are and what they think.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: But wait, aren't they the ones conflating gender with salad? I'll have you know, ladies, I make a mean salad -- lettuce, tomatoes, onions -- of course, it's on top of a burger, but it's a salad, you pathetic, pathetic sexists. Disgusting.

Anyway, this media response again proves two things. The press will use anything to trash Trump and it's as if the trashing is always in lockstep, because it is. According to the Media Research Center, for Trump in 2018, coverage was 90% negative and for the second year in a row, Russia was the most covered Trump topic, which makes me think if space aliens landed on earth and proceeded to devour the human race, annihilating billions of innocent humans in a brutal rampage of mutilation and dismemberment, the surviving media would ask how does this affect the Mueller probe?

The media has been so screwed up since Trump that they even see white privilege among blacks.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

AREVA MARTIN, ANALYST, CNN: That's a whole another long conversation about white privilege, the things that you have the privilege of doing that people of color don't have the privilege of.

DAVID WEBB, RADIO TALK SHOW HOST: How do I ask where village of white privilege?

MARTIN: David, by virtue of being a white male, you have white privilege.

WEBB: Areva, I hate to break it to you, but you should have been better prepped. I'm black.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Wait, he's black? Yes, yes. It's like - holy crap, but the big news of the week, Nancy Pelosi a.k.a. the rich aunt who still gives you a lousy Christmas gift urges President Trump in a letter to deliver his State of the Union in writing. I bet he took that seriously. I wonder how he looked after reading her letter.

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: Flea market. All right, so how did Trump respond to Nancy? He canceled her trip to Brussels 30 minutes - he only canceled flight, people will applaud. He actually wrote her a letter. It's priceless. In it, he says, "Due to the shutdown, I am sorry to inform you that your trip has been canceled." Yes, he's sorry.

Somehow, I doubt that he's really sorry. I wonder how he felt when he dropped that letter in the mail.

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: Keep going. It's too perfect. Now, Trump canceled the trip, but it could have been worse. Think about it. He could have boarded the plane beforehand and filled it with fast food or he could have let it take off, then halfway there, rerouted it. Rerouted it to Mar-a-Lago and never tell Nancy, so as she steps off the aircraft, she's thinking, "Wow, Brussels looks a lot like Palm Beach." Or once they were ready to depart, announce that they're having a very special pilot flying this plane.

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: Yes, so Nancy got off easy, but so did Donald. Think about it. Nancy's initial request just gave him the perfect excuse to get out of the worst thing ever, the State of the Union. It sucks. It's boring. It's dreadful. It's the ceremonial version of a colonoscopy and I know, I had one on Wednesday. Let's roll the tape.

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: Sorry, wrong tape. Can we roll the tape of my colonoscopy?

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: All right, one more time, can we see my colonoscopy?

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: How did Bruce Willis get in there? I hope he reads the card. Anyhow, old joke, the State of the Union takes place in D.C. which means if it happens, I have to go to D.C. and I don't want to go to D.C. To get to D.C., I have to take a train through Delaware and Baltimore first, which is like having sex with two goats in order to have sex with a mule.

So Nancy's letter gave Trump and me a golden ticket out of a nightmare. Trump should cancel the D.C. thing, get a large arena, a packet-full of fans have a great night. The press will have to cover it. After all, it's their job and it's going to be hilarious, and the Dems will feel compelled to respond with the same two miserable stiffs who together can merrily manage a pulse. It's too good to pass up. Imagine what Trump could come up with? It could be the greatest thing ever.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Tired of the same old boring State of the Union address featuring 45 minutes of soaring generalizations followed by 50% applause, 50% expressionless faces. Then get ready for President Trump's State of the Milky Way Galaxy Because It's The Best Galaxy Of All The Galaxies Address.

Live from the surface of Titan, Saturn's largest moon. Because Neptune was too low energy.

TRUMP: Boy, oh, boy, that's a low energy planet.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: This isn't your Earthly State of the Union. No Congress. No Capitol. No problem. The usual crowds are not invited. But the media is invited. Why? Because it's face no one can hear the media whine about the President's Twitter feed, the President giving funny nicknames to his enemies.

TRUMP: Crying Chuck and Nancy.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: The President eating well-done steak. The President being aggressively honest.

TRUMP: We give billions and billions of dollars to these foreign countries that don't give a damn about us.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: The President asking NATO to pay their fair share or any accomplishment in his first two years of office. Plus, there will be tons of Universe-changing announcements like how the new Space Force has already won the first contact war of 2027 against their evil space [bleep] from the Andromeda Galaxy.

Or how he has turned the rings of Saturn into actual onion rings, with unlimited dipping sauce from Chick-Fil-A.

And of course how he plans to build a space wall around Earth and make the Martians pay for it. It's the State of the Milky Way Galaxy Because It's The Best Galaxy Of All The Galaxies Address.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Let's welcome tonight's guests. His dimples run as deep as his patriotism, "Fox and Friends" weekend co-hosts Pete Hegseth. She's so bright she saves money on lamps, stock market guru and financial analyst Heather Zumarraga. She is so sharp, her thoughts come with warning labels, "National Review" reporter, Kat Timpf. And he makes onions cry, former WWE Superstar and my massive sidekick and host of "UnPC" on Fox Nation, that's Tyrus.

GEORGE "TYRUS" MURDOCH, HOST: I make onions cry.

GUTFELD: All right, Pete, hasn't Pelosi handed Trump an amazing gift that he should take advantage of?

PETE HEGSETH, CO-HOST "FOX AND FRIENDS": Yes, I first have to say that open was something special.

GUTFELD: Oh, thank you.

HEGSETH: Truly. It was an amazing gift because - if it was conventional, what would happen? Trump would give an entire speech with Nancy Pelosi standing - seated behind him in the House Chamber. Who wants that? We wouldn't want any part of that. Now, he gets to pick his venue. See, they want to take him - here's the thing though, they want to take him out of the trappings of the Presidency. They don't want him to look like the President. That is their issue. That's why they don't want him in the House of Representatives.

Fine. Do it in the Senate. Where you would have Mike Pence and Mitch McConnell behind him or even better, forget her disingenuous speakership, disinvite all the Democrats, go to the border, right in front of the wall and say, "See these steel slats right here. This is what we need, America. And you know we need it. Let's do it."

I mean people would be receptive to that. Keep pounding. He's got the winning message. The question is, who blinks first and I don't think it has to be him.

GUTFELD: Interesting. What about you, Heather? What do you think? Obviously, no matter what he does, the media is going to trash him, as you could tell by the numbers, so ...

HEATHER ZUMARRAGA, STOCK MARKET GURU AND FINANCIAL ANALYST: Yes, they really do. I mean, I cover the economy quite often. The stock market was up again this week, the economy is doing very well, overall; unemployment, 50-year lows, wages are going up, over half of Americans view the economy as good or excellent, but you won't hear that on CNN or MSNBC.

I mean, they guy just can't get a win. It's not covered even the economic feats of deregulation and tax cuts, that's what really matters to the American people at the end of the day, is do I have a good job and can I pay my bills?

GUTFELD: Well, you know what matters to me? Fast food, Kat, fast food. You eat it. I've seen you eat it.

KATHERINE TIMPF, REPORTER, NATIONAL REVIEW: I do eat it.

GUTFELD: It's disgusting. You do it at your desk.

TIMPF: I do eat it. I often order from Posts Mates to get McDonald's delivered to my house, from a McDonald's that's maybe 250 feet away.

GUTFELD: Yes, yes. And you did what you believe to be a cookie just about five minutes ago.

TIMPF: I did and it was not a good cookie. I was disappointed in the quality of the cookie.

GUTFELD: All right.

TIMPF: If I would have gone to this banquet and seen fast food, I would have been thrilled.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: It's the best food. I hate when people act like they're above fast food. Like what are you drinking some kale smoothie that tastes like chalk?

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: Come on? Everybody - the joy of McDonald's is incomparable, Greg.

GUTFELD: I agree. I agree and it saves lives. It saves lives, I don't the stats --

ZUMARRAGA: McDonald's?

MURDOCH: Three out of five.

GUTFELD: Three out five.

MURDOCH: Three out of five lives saved.

(CROSSTALK)

GUTFELD: Three out of five lives have been saved by McDonald's.

ZUMARRAGA: That's what really matters to the American people.

GUTFELD: It does. There's nothing more American than the Golden Arches.

HEGSETH: Amen.

GUTFELD: Yes, Tyrus.

MURDOCH: Yes.

GUTFELD: Thoughts?

MURDOCH: You know those two people that died, they didn't try hard.

GUTFELD: They didn't eat enough McDonald's, Tyrus.

MURDOCH: They took the apple slices, so they had to go.

GUTFELD: Yes, yes.

MURDOCH: You know what, I - the biggest - the coolest thing this week, I actually enjoy the back and forth with Pelosi and President Trump. The problem is I just wish it wasn't during a government shutdown because you have some really great jokes there, but unfortunately, people were out of work.

GUTFELD: People were out of work.

MURDOCH: So it's not like, "Hey, man," but when she did it. When she says, 'Based on security which is like subliminal for, "Hey, Trump [bleep], you're not coming to my house tonight." She was a legend. She was Queen. Amazing, brilliant, thoughtful. Wow. He's like, "Okay, I raise your FU and I give you, you can't - I'll wait until you're on the bus. Bags packed. Shots given. You know, Pence was like, "Now, Mr. President?" 
"No, not yet. Not yet. Not yet."

The eye the sky was watching. They waited for her to put her headphones on and leaned back, and then there was a knock and it was a folded up, "This is for you." She was like, "What the [bleep]." That's exactly right. But, he was a monster. He ate a baby while - he actually wrote the letter with baby's blood. He was the worst human being in the planet.

HEGSETH: Childish.

MURDOCH: Childish, sexist. Acosta was a wreck. He had to write a whole new diss for him. I just think it's - the disparity, they're both doing it. They both have to say, "I respect it. We have the same problem. We both have the last word disease, so when we butt heads, no one will leave," because I know you are, I know you are - and that's what's going on with them.

It's just too bad it's during a government shutdown because this is going to go for a long time.

GUTFELD: Yes, it's highly entertaining.

MURDOCH: They'll be out of office, both of them and still doing this.

GUTFELD: Yes, I think he waited until she put the Ambien, like you know, when you take the Ambien and then it's like, no - and then you've got to wake up, but everything is screwed up and you're like, you don't know - I don't know where to go. Never take your Ambien before you board a plane because if the plane is delayed, you're wandering around the airport, you end up eating a four-pound bag of Toblerone, it's all over your face, you say something stupid, then you mistake a water fountain for a bathroom. These are things that I've done.

HEGSETH: They're too specific.

GUTFELD: All right, the "Gutfeld Monologues Live" is coming to Florida for two shows in March and two more cities have been added to the tour because it's so successful. Washington, April 6th; Detroit, April 7th and in May, Stockton, Tulsa, Oklahoma, Dallas and Midlands, Texas. Tickets for all shows on sale now. Go to ggutfeld.com for ticket information. Up next, it's impeachment-itis and it's spreading more meltdowns you won't believe.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: "You must impeach," the haters beseech. "The Atlantic," a magazine, Pete, not the ocean has a cover story urging to start the Trump impeachment process because it will quote, "Rein in a President who is undermining American ideals and bring the debate about his fitness for office into Congress where it belong." If you say so "Atlantic," but I think you're selling Trump short.

You think a little impeachment process is going to slow him down. Hell, no. If there's anything we've learned, antagonism is his fuel. He eats that [bleep] for breakfast. Impeachment to Trump is like spinach to Popeye. Three quick points why impeachment is lose-lose for the Libs.

One, when they impeached Bill Clinton, it made him more popular than ever. America loves the underdog even if he's a dog. Number two, if you kick Trump out of office, that leaves us with Pence who is Conservative he makes Trump look like Mother Teresa and number three, if it succeeds, you still have Trump around who's folk hero status will make him bigger than Paul Bunyan and he's not going away, friends.

So I say bring it on, because if it backfires, Dems will do this.

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: I'll never get tired of that. Tyrus, I think that the impeachment thing because you know Trump, whenever you feed him something that you think is going to hurt him, for some reason he like fashions it into a weapon and then fires it back at you. I think it's a win for - it would it reelect him.

MURDOCH: Listen, this is just like if I was to assault a bunch of people and I got to pick my jury. You're going do time? "Yes, really not with my friends." The Senate is Republican, correct?

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: So you want to waste all of this? You know, I think he would eat it up. I think he would let the House go forward with it. He would get in the Senate and he wouldn't show up. He would be 45 minutes late, and then he would come in and he would he would make fun of some people and then he would like, "You all want to get ahead and vote?" "Well, Mr. President, we're going to give you ..." "No, let them vote." "Or you know what, talk amongst yourselves, let me know when they vote, I'll be back."

There is nothing that the - the impeachment is never going to pass the Senate. The Republicans are not going to impeach him out, regardless of whatever you think he might have done, or what he's going to do, you're not going to get those votes. It's a complete waste of time.

The only way you can get him out, and judging off those late night show things where they all declared for office, you've got to vote him out because he's not going to - it just - that's the only way it's going to happen.

GUTFELD: I mean, and the thing is - that's the point, Kat, if they really want - we're two years into this. Just wait another two years, and then vote. I've said this before on a show called "The Five."

MURDOCH: Never heard of it.

GUTFELD: Yes, it's interesting. Why not try to beat him instead of cheat him? Yes, thank you. Rhyming, a little tip, Kat?

TIMPF: We're all clapping because Greg rhymes.

GUTFELD: Yes, yes. Think about it, rhyming is fun.

TIMPF: I feel like he is not going to get impeached because everything is fine.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: Am I the only person out there who thinks that everything's fine?

GUTFELD: I'm there.

TIMPF: I mean, I wake up in the morning. I eat an egg sandwich. I run my mouth all day and then I go home and go to bed and I do it over again. It's fine.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: I don't understand what they're seeing that I'm not seeing. It's not that I've loved every single thing he's ever said or done because I certainly haven't and I've been very open about that, but it seems as though there's no middle ground where you can just say, "Hey, you know what, I might not like this guy, maybe I won't vote for him," instead of saying, "We've got to get him out now because I don't like him and the world is going to end."

I mean, I read this "Atlantic" piece and it made it - it seemed like we'd all been living in little mine caves eating beans out of a can.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: Which, we're pretty much only doing if we want to.

GUTFELD: Yes, in fact that's kind of similar to how you described your life except it's egg salad.

TIMPF: I love egg salad.

GUTFELD: Who doesn't love egg salad?

TIMPF: I can't wait to be an old, old woman and just go around to deli shouting at someone when they're out of egg salad.

GUTFELD: That'll be in five years. Heather?

ZUMARRAGA: He clearly despises President Trump. I think he wrote this article to doom re-election 2020 bid and I completely agree with Kat. Look, you vote him out if it - what did you say, "If you can't beat them ..."

GUTFELD: Cheat him.

ZUMARRAGA: No.

GUTFELD: If you can't beat him, eat him. That's the cannibal wing of the 
party.

MURDOCH: So now, he's going to get weird. It's going to get weird. This is going to get really weird right now.

GUTFELD: It is. I think it's weird.

ZUMARRAGA: But 63 million Americans voted for him, so whether you like him or not, you can't delegitimize the election process and not liking him like you said is not good enough that's not - by itself, is not grounds for impeachment.

HEGSETH: I just don't know if they can get past it though. They can't focus on 2020 because they haven't gotten over 2016.

GUTFELD: Exactly.

HEGSETH: And they don't believe he's legitimate in the first place.

GUTFELD: They can't enter a new relationship when they're still involved in an old one relationship.

MURDOCH: Are you talking about the government or my ex-wife?

HEGSETH: Isn't there already that ex out there and he's called Bob Mueller and he gets through - doesn't he get to decide?

GUTFELD: Yes, he gets to decide.

HEGSETH: Waiting - are we waiting on this?

GUTFELD: Yes, I find it highly entertaining and if he - the thing is if this dog catches the car, the car is going to hit the dog. That's all I'm saying. All right, up next, by fingers what would happen if there was a female version of the Gillette male-bashing ad? We're going to show you even if you didn't ask for it.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

ROBERT GRAY, CORRESPONDENT: Live from "America's News Headquarters," I am Robert Gray. More than 70 people are dead after a pipeline exploded at an illegal pipeline tap in Mexico. Nearly 100 people are missing and dozens injured. On Friday, hundreds gathered in a field near Mexico City to fill containers with gas, but were trapped in a massive inferno. Now, grief-stricken relatives watch as forensic experts separate burnt bodies. Mexico's new President has cracked down on fuel theft gangs that has caused widespread fuel shortages.

New developments in the Flint, Michigan water crisis. Fifteen people have been charged after lead contamination sparked an outbreak of Legionnaires disease and other issues. Eight people are facing multiple charges including involuntary manslaughter. The crisis dates back to 2014 and has been linked to 12 deaths. Now back to "The Greg Gutfeld Show."

GUTFELD: Should those who keep us shaven let your men on misbehaving, all right, by now you've probably seen that new Gillette ad that smears adult men in order to score some virtue points with the social justice mob and if you haven't seen the ad, don't say I didn't warn you.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Bullying --

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: The #MeToo Movement against sexual harassment.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Toxic masculinity.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: Is the best a man can get? Is it? We can't hide from it. It's been going on far too long. We can't laugh at all.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: That ad made a lot of good honest men feel like they'll never get credit for being good honest men, but I wonder could you even try and ad like that with women?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Is the best women can do? As feminists, shouldn't women get equal treatment, after all, fair is fair.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Gilette, do you think women are weak? You target men, but you spare us? That's just sexist.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: So now, it's our turn. To confess our own bad behavior.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: We forced men to watch terrible movies and we FaceTime our cat during it.

TIMPF: Oh, does Jinx need to wee-wee. Does Jinx need to wee-wee.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: And no matter the month, we won't stop telling you how cold we are.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Jeremy, I am so cold.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: We believe in Astrology and date accordingly.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: Oh, Jim, I'm so flattered, but I actually don't date Capricorns, unless you're hot and in the NHL. Ivan, call me.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: We say we're not hungry and then we eat your food and complain about what you eat.

MURDOCH: Are you going to order any food or --

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: I'll just have some of yours. God, you eating like such an adolescent. Can you think, wow ...

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE: But we swear to do better because if men want to improve, shouldn't we also. Nah, who are we kidding? We're not changing a thing. Because we don't have to and you're going to love us anyway because you love women. How can you not? We're awesome and so are men.

Sure men have their flaws. Women have them, too. But to mistake the bad stuff with the whole, is simply a loser's game. Don't be a loser.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: Well done. Well done. All right, Heather, did you like the initial ad? Did you like the emotion or the meaning of it?

ZUMARRAGA: I thought it was well done, whether you agree with their intentions or not. I appreciate the emotion behind the ad, but liberalism, I think it's so potent right now that a company is willing to alienate over 50% of their client base, so while their intentions may have been good, I think it's a very bad business decision.

GUTFELD: Yes, you know Pete I think it's a subset of liberalism, which is identity politics, which artificially pits genders against each other. I don't think you would ever had that commercial if it wasn't for the fact that we're pitting male against female, race against race, gender against gender.

I don't think - I mean, the point of our commercials to say that we're not opposed, we complement each other. We are necessary to exist together.

HEGSETH: Of course. I thought that ad was horrific. No, I was - I don't get triggered very easily these days because there's so much absurdity out there. But what it basically was saying men the - first of all, they build up a formula of who men are right and then second of all, they say if you are a man then you're toxic in the way you do it and if your kid is tough or rough or if you've - if you like females, you're bad.

If you look back at the old Gillette ads, I don't know if you watched any - maybe you have them, they're amazing. Look at the guys, I'm like - the guy is successful. He's scoring a touchdown. He's being nice to his kids --

GUTFELD: Could I show you? I have an old Gillette ad. Let's show that old Gillette ad, shall we friends?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE: It combines a deep cleaning body wash with three times the hydrators, a powerful against dry skin. You'll step out of the shower feeling like you can take on the world.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

HEGSETH: That's not the ad I was referring to, Greg.

GUTFELD: You see what that is? Oh, it make him sexually attractive, so she is like into him because he only uses the body wash.

HEGSETH: Maybe he smells good.

GUTFELD: I found it repulsive. I don't need to see that kind of human flesh, Tyrus.

MURDOCH: You do and that's the whole reason why you focus on just the dude washing himself - rushing that commercial. You know what, I could get into trouble, but I've got a lot of attention because I threw a diss at them after I did the story. And then I did an internet post where I'm talking about them before they throw a shade, they're part of the tree and I posted a picture of the Gillette girls who are at a car racing show with Gillette on their butts. You know what I am saying?

And like, clean up your own backyard before you tell us how to act like men. The best thing that they should do, it's a razor company so maybe talk about if you're hairy, try this razor. You know what I am saying? Like, but on top of that, their sexism is worse than the guys in that - and I'm barbecuing and I'll be damned if I'll have an open flame and my child's beating up another child.

First of all, I wouldn't allow that anyways, but if we switch that out, if we would have had a bunch of women and watch the start - a bunch of women with aprons with cookies standing together going, "Girls will be girls." Hell to the no. Gillette would be gone in a minute, not to mention their pink razors for women are more expensive. Come on, ladies.

Gillette needs to clean up --

GUTFELD: And they are pink.

MURDOCH: Yes, and honestly, you know what's funny, the women use the men's razors most of the time and those of us in the wrestling business, Bobby Lashley, they used the pink ones all the time. He said it was more - oh, I am dropping down, it's all coming out, but my point was clean up your own yard if you're talking about yours, most men are good and what about irresponsible women? Where's the Kardashians in that commercial?

GUTFELD: Yes.

MURDOCH: Telling me I've got to get filters and hair extensions and cosmetic surgery to be pretty and you can't be sexy unless you got likes. Come on, Kat, tell them.

GUTFELD: But Kat, what I found funny is that the media criticized men for responding to the ad that portrayed the misogyny of - as the norm, it's like - so once men started to go, "Oh, why you don't like it when men are being portrayed as misogynist?" Well, yes, kind of.

TIMPF: I'm just completely confused how you think there's no ad telling women to be different.

GUTFELD: There are probably many.

TIMPF: Welcome to the entire beauty and fitness industry. It's like your hair is not that shiny, you need this to make your hair more shiny like her hair. Your butt is too big. Your butt is too small. Oh, no that bras is gross. You can't wear that bra. No one is going to ever have sex with you if you wear that bra or like, you look so much prettier if you smile more. Smile more. Ew, not like that, your teeth aren't white enough. You've got to use these white like this lady. Notice how this lady, she's baking gluten free brownies for her kids before they go to school, do you do that for your kids? Are you [bleep] mom? Oh, yes, you're [bleep] mom. Oh, yes, you're not only [bleep] mom, but you're also fat. You look a little tired. You should put some concealer under those eyes. But those concealer, and you're old, you look old, this lotion - lotion - you need to lotion yourself and lotion your body so you don't start to look old and you need to own the hairspray because if your hair doesn't stay like that all day long ...

MURDOCH: She ain't going to stop.

TIMPF: ... it has to stay like that all day long.

MURDOCH: We might as well go into commercial.

TIMPF: You can't just have pretty hair in the morning, you've got to have pretty hair at night. It has got to last the whole day because you never know who's going to see. Do you know Susan from the county, she has really, really nice hair, and did you do yoga today? Did you exercise? Did you eat yogurt? Wait, no don't eat dairy. Don't eat dairy. Dairy is bad.

MURDOCH: She's not going to stop.

TIMPF: Don't eat dairy. Dairy is bad. Is your hair too short? Is it too long? Your nails are short? Are your nails too short? Are they so short? You're never going to find a boyfriend ...

MURDOCH: Go to commercial.

TIMPF: Let's glue. Let's glue things. Let's glue things at the tip of your nails and make you sit there like this for an hour like an idiot because you have to be good enough. Yes, no, women are never told anything that needs to be different, Greg.

GUTFELD: Unfortunately, we're going to have to edit that entire segment out of the show.

ZUMARRAGA: She's right.

GUTFELD: Now, I'm convinced we need more commercials bashing men. All right, up next would you ingest the blood of young people just to stay young yourself? Sure. I do it already.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: I love this story. Is it purely delusion define youth in a transfusion? "Business Insider" reports that Ambrosia, a startup company will fill your veins with a pint of young blood in the hopes and we stress hopes that the cells from the young blood will rejuvenate organs and keep you youthful. Ambrosia says they tested the process on mice, "Oh, well then that's great."

But in "Business Insider," found no evidence of it working on humans and experts even told them it could be dangerous. Still Ambrosia has expanded to five cities, so someone is buying the blood probably Lou Dobbs, so what would you pay for one pint of young blood from someone between the ages of 16 to 25? If you're buying from Ambrosia that pint run you eight grand or two pints for twelve grand. That's a lot of money. Here's how they give it to you.

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: It's definitely not right. All right, Kat, I'm a free-market kind of guy and I think that if somebody wants to buy blood, they could and if you could sell your blood to anyone, we would stop demonizing Dracula.

TIMPF: Yes. 
GUTFELD: You could go out whenever you want. He doesn't have to wait for the nighttime. He could just live his life. If you outlaw blood, only outlaws will have blood.

TIMPF: Yes, there will be a black market for young blood.

GUTFELD: Yes.

TIMPF: I hate humanity.

GUTFELD: I do. I love humanity.

TIMPF: I just - there's certain things I like to have my own of, like toothbrush, underwear, blood definitely falls into that for me and also there's little to no evidence that this actually works. That's a sentence in the article that I did definitely read because I'm always prepared and I don't want to sound like a penny pincher, but before I spend $8,000.00 on a thing, that thing working, kind of important to me.

GUTFELD: It is. It is. You know, I have a theory, Pete, these ultra-rich billionaires in Silicon Valley got rich really young, so they're in their 30s and they're billionaires. There are more billionaires now than ever. The one thing they don't have is immortality. They have everything else and it's on their brain.

They're like, "God, I don't want to lose all this. One day I'm going to die. I'm a billionaire." So this is - they are finding anything they can.

HEGSETH: What they forget though is that when you're young, you have your immaturity, like they say it's in your blood, right, so many things. Like I did so much dumb [bleep] when I was in my 20s and 30s, I want that blood back in me.

GUTFELD: Don't limit yourself to your 30s, Pete.

HEGSETH: I want old blood. Blood that teaches me to make good decisions.

GUTFELD: You need that.

HEGSETH: That's the blood I need in my life.

GUTFELD: That is such a funny point. It's true.

HEGSETH: That's what I need.

GUTFELD: You need my blood.

HEGSETH: I would like Greg Gutfeld.

GUTFELD: My blood is so neurotic.

MURDOCH: I would not.

GUTFELD: My blood is so neurotic.

MURDOCH: I would not do that.

HEGSETH: I think that it's a bad line to consider.

GUTFELD: You would never make a bad decision because my blood keeps me in a locked room.

HEGSETH: That might be a future segment.

GUTFELD: I think so, I can sell my blood, Tyrus.

MURDOCH: Listen, we just live in a world where people just don't want to grow old.

GUTFELD: Yes, that's true.

MURDOCH: You're too old already, let it go. You know what I am saying, before it extends for guys because for the extra, you know what I am saying. Just let it go, man. Just let your sex drive go.

HEGSETH: You're hitting what it is, yes.

MURDOCH: Women they've got to lighten the hair. They've got to add the hair, you know, don't get used - you know what, go ahead, get started you wanted to, but like this is a problem. It's blood. It's always something. Botox. It's always something. A filter. Just, American, let's just grow old and chill out, man. Greg here is old.

GUTFELD: I can't wait until I'm old.

MURDOCH: And I'm not putting nobody's blood in me. I don't know where they've been. I don't know.

GUTFELD: Heather, is this a good business decision? Something you invest in?

ZUMARRAGA: I personally would not, but it seems like people are paying. They're saying, I don't know, a hundred people, $8,000.00 people are willing to pay a good business maybe, they have a bunch of venture capital invested in them, but look, oh my gosh, if it gives you cognitive abilities, try it on Congress as a control group.

GUTFELD: They do need new blood. You know what, I'm going to make a cut - I've got to go to a break, but I think that if becoming a vampire is possible, why not? Like immortality in exchange for you know, staying up at night in a strict diet, that's kind of it's - it's a fair trade off. It's like I would also be a zombie. It's like you gross, you know, people don't want to be around you, but you live forever, that's kind of how I am now. Nobody wants to be around me when I'm mortal. I can be immortal and no one's around me.

HEGSETH: They're still not around you.

GUTFELD: Yes, exactly. I want to be a vampire zombie.

HEGSETH: What about a robot?

GUTFELD: And a robot. Good segue, we just told you what they're doing with teenager blood. We need to see what they're doing with insect brains. Oh, the things you learn on this show.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: Will robots rain when given insect brains the Pentagon's research wing wants to build artificial intelligence not from human reasoning, but insect reasoning in order to help build smaller and more efficient AI. It's good that they're not going for artificial intelligence that could outsmart us one day. I mean how smart is a cockroach anyway? They can't even drive.

But there is a potential downside. Hasn't anyone seen those movies about killer bees? I mean I can step on an ant, but not a robot killer bee. Frankly, I think we should model AI off something else. I would prefer a swarm of this.

(VIDEO PLAYS)

GUTFELD: Yes, all right, Pete, you're a military man. This is obviously technology that is going to be used to kill people with, right?

HEGSETH: Animals are great, as you often say. Of course, apparently it's easier because it has - insects make few decisions than a real brain.

GUTFELD: Yes, it's non-conscious thinking.

HEGSETH: So you give them 15 little commands and suddenly they can kill thousands of people.

GUTFELD: Right, yes.

HEGSETH: This will be used. The more I listen to you, which is a strange thing to hear come out of my mouth, the more I believe that this kind of stuff will happen in the future, either we figure it out or the bad guys are going to figure out.

GUTFELD: Absolutely, you know, Kat, I've always did - the future of AI is not to mimic our intelligence because we have consciousness. It's going to be non-conscious thinking which is an insect. The problem with it is, as long as you could control the insect, it's okay. You can step on it, but non-conscious thinking when it's out of your control cannot be stopped like mosquitoes with malaria non-conscious thinking. It doesn't care that it's killing people. It's just doing what it does. That's the scary part, Kat. You should be terrified.

TIMPF: No. I don't know I think it's pretty good. I mean, insect brains are different than our brains.

GUTFELD: True.

TIMPF: In some ways they're worse, but in some ways they're better like they don't worry about things like feelings or emotion.

GUTFELD: That is true.

TIMPF: And I know this because I said some very mean things to a fly once and he stayed in my apartment. No human would have done that if I would have said the things I said to this fly. I will tell you that. He just kept buzzing around. He was completely unaffected.

GUTFELD: Perhaps he had eyes for you.

MURDOCH: Oh boy.

GUTFELD: How many eyes do flies have by the way?

TIMPF: A lot.

GUTFELD: A lot of eyes, Heather.

MURDOCH: They have two eyes with a lot of chambers.

GUTFELD: A lot of chambers. Thank you. The scientist, Tyrus. Heather - is this a good use of our tax dollars?

ZUMARRAGA: Look, we're falling behind in terms of global advancement and technology. China has an initiative Made in 2025 that's all about artificial intelligence advancements, so if we want to remain competitive on a global scale, China put the manufacturing sector especially in America off the grid decades ago, so this is one way to do it with artificial intelligence.

I think this is a great idea. Not sure how well it's going to work out with the insect brain side of it, but look Nancy Pelosi wants to send robot dogs to the border, $700 million it's going to cost, so this mightbe a better idea than robot dogs.

GUTFELD: Their [bleep] doesn't stink.

ZUMARRAGA: Or a wall would be a better idea.

GUTFELD: You know what I like about these little insect brains, Tyrus.

MURDOCH: Oh gosh.

GUTFELD: I'll tell you what, you could come after me and I just unleash them on you and they crawl all over your body and then I can run away from you.

MURDOCH: A cup of water, it's over. No, you know what, I'm going to kick some signs that you called me a scientist, smartass, well, here's some science for you. We don't control insects now. The only thing stopping insects is that Mother Nature designed to keep them small.

GUTFELD: Right, that's true.

MURDOCH: Their skeleton - their endoskeleton keeps them small. If you take that brain and put it in a machine whose sole purpose is to stay alive, procreate and kill things around it that's a threat and it can manufacture itself into a larger size, you can kiss our human asses goodbye and there will be no debating with it. You need to be careful with this type of technology because that brain has been around for a really long time. It's almost perfect in terms of survival and moving on. It might decide that you'll throw a bunch and they'll realize - a little sick tiny dude. He kept us in his sick jacket is worth eating, so they'll take you down.

GUTFELD: All these insects, I don't trust them. Speak English.

HEGSETH: Fix your language.

GUTFELD: I want to make English the official language of insects. All right final thoughts next. If there are any.

(COMMERCIAL BREAK)

GUTFELD: We are out of time. Special thanks to Pete Hegseth, Heather Zumarraga, Kat Timpf, Tyrus, and our studio audience. I am Greg Gutfeld. I love you, America.

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