This is a rush transcript from "The Five," September 21, 2018. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.
DANA PERINO, FOX NEWS HOST: Hello, everyone. I'm Dana Perino along with Morgan Ortagus, Marie Harf, Jesse Watters, and Greg Gutfeld. It's 5 o'clock in New York City, and this is "The Five."
A lot of breaking news to get to including reports that Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein discussed wearing a wire to secretly record the president and invoking the 25th amendment, new information and our reaction to that developing story, but, first, the battle over confirming Brett Kavanaugh, senate judiciary committee Republicans hoping to have an answer by the end of the day on if Christine Blasey Ford will appear next week at a possible Wednesday hearing. Lawyers for Dr. Ford laying out demands last night that include having Brett Kavanaugh testify first. But Republicans are pushing back on that request during negotiations. President Trump also weighing in by accusing Democrats of trying to, quote, destroy and delay. The president also saying it's time to move forward with the nomination.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
DONALD TRUMP, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA: I don't think you can delay it any longer. They've delayed it a week already. I happen to accommodate, the guy said let her say what she has to say and let's see how it all comes out. But they've delayed it a week, and they have to get on with it.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: A new information out today, one of the things her lawyers have said now, Greg, is that she does not want to fly. So she doesn't want to testify on Monday because, perhaps, she might have to drive to Washington.
GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS HOST: You kind of get the sense that now the Democrats are just playing with us, you know. The people that want to get this thing done and do the right thing. They're just saying let's just try this avenue. They offered -- didn't the Republicans offer to come and see her. So here's a tell that this is all political, when everyone on the other side assumes the worst of your opinion. So if you believe that this is political and they say, well, you're defending sexual abuse. No, I'm just admitting this is more complicated and more nuanced to problem than you wish it was. And the Dems in a political battle they do not accommodate, but Republicans do, and the reason why because Democrats always attack you morally. They attack your character. They say that, you know, if you do not, you know, if you do not believe this person, you're an evil, sexist creature. They would agree with me on this too, by the way. The fact is -- and the Republicans they get scared and they go, oh, oh, back off, back off, so they're accommodating and they're accommodating. Now they're being taken advantage of. And I think it might be time to say enough. We would fly out there first class to see you or fly you out here first class. We'll get a motorcade. We'll do whatever you want. And the fact that that's not enough is telling you something.
PERINO: And, Marie, one of the things that -- about that is that now that they say that they don't want a lawyer to ask any questions during the hearing. They want it to be the senators, but they want Brett Kavanaugh to go first. How can he go first if the allegations against him are not laid out before that?
MARIE HARF, FOX NEWS HOST: There's nothing to respond to, right? Look, there's a lot of back and forth on details and how this will happen. And I don't think there's a substantive difference between Monday or Wednesday or Friday. And if she wants to drive let her drive and she can testify at the end of the week. Fine.
GUTFELD: Driving is dangerous.
HARF: Well, I wouldn't drive across the country, but if she doesn't want to fly, just let her drive.
GUTFELD: Safest form of travel is flying.
HARF: But the bigger question -- so Dana's point is interesting about the, you know, choreography. I can't get that word out, Friday, like I've been drinking and I haven't. How this plays out is interesting, I think. And they will be hammering out those details over the days before this happens. But a bigger question politically, Dana, is President Trump changing his tune this morning. A lot of Republicans in the senate, I think, were very happy. And in the house were very happy that he had been measured, that he had said he was going to hear from her and wasn't attacking her personally. This morning he changed tunes. He went after her on twitter really aggressively. And I think there's some Republicans on the hill that I'm hearing from that are like this is already complicated enough as it is. President Trump is not a perfect vehicle to push back on these kinds of allegations.
PERINO: Well, I would say from President Trump's perspective, he's been pretty patient, Jesse, for about five days. And.
JESSE WATTERS, FOX NEWS HOST: Patient for Trump.
PERINO: I don't know. Yeah, exactly.
WATTERS: But more patient on anything that I've ever seen him do, and people on the hill, as you said, were very happy with that. He was not happy withholding back and he unloaded. I thought that was about a 3 out of 10. He could have gone much harder after her. And I'm sure he's chomping at the bit, too. And he kind of feels the way Greg's been feeling about this. We've reached a point where Republicans have bent over backwards to accommodate her. And they want to hear from her. And they're doing everything possible to make it easy for her to come and testify.
But, you get the point that they're getting strung along from the driving, to the footsie, to the not returning the phone calls. It's all about delay. And it makes you think do they really care about getting the truth out or do they care about delaying? So she testifies on Wednesday, right, after the drive across country. I hope it's very scenic and she hits no traffic. Tuesday comes around and, oh, you know, maybe she's sick. Maybe there's another witness that's come forward. You don't know what's going to happen. At this point, I've lost total trust in Dianne Feinstein and the rest of the Democrats on the committee. They've abused the process throughout the last month. What's to think they're not going to pull some more high jinx at the end, and we have to preface it by saying if this true I feel for this woman. I believe she believes something happened. But the more and more we get into the gamesmanship the more skeptical people get.
PERINO: And, Morgan, today, Mitch McConnell, the senator -- the senate majority leader was at the value voter's conference, and he said don't get rattled. Just stay calm. He will be a Supreme Court justice and he just said soon. What do you think he was trying to signal?
MORGAN ORTAGUS, FOX NEWS HOST: So, I agree that I think what we've seen the past week is something that looked like, OK, we want to seriously hear this woman and it's gotten more and more, more political this week. If you'll notice -- and I have to say, I'm pretty disappointed in the Democrat members on this justice committee. People like Feinstein who actually thought during those four days, actually conducted herself well compared to Spartacus and others on the committee. And there're other people on that committee that I've traveled with on congressional delegation that I have a high opinion of. And to see their statements which I think have gotten to be so blatantly political.
If you really think that this woman is a victim of sexual assault, if you truly believe that, I don't think that she's being handled properly by the Democrats at all. And Axios is reporting -- has just reported that the Democrats are seeing this as another wedge moment to drive out even more female votes for the midterms. So it's gotten political and the Democrats know that they see that this is an issue to get more women out. And you know what? I think it's disgusting because sexual assault is the most underreported crime that there is. I think all of us probably know someone who's been a victim. And the way that this has turned into such -- I know we can all be cynical, the way this has been turned into a nasty partisan exercise to drive out voters for a midterm election by the Democrats, I find unseemly.
WATTERS: That's a good point. I'm not so sure we can place all the blame on Dr. Ford because she has now.
ORTAGUS: No, I'm not blaming her. I'm blaming the Democrats.
WATTERS: She has a team around her now. She has the lawyer, Katz, and then she has this Bork artist that's been doing this for decades against Republican judicial nominees. And then she's got another team, an outside group helping her, and she's got the senate Democrats. So she's being advised by people that -- to some it looks like may not have her best interest at heart. They may think more about derailing the nomination than actually helping an alleged victim of a sexual assault.
HARF: Republicans -- look, I don't want that to be the case. I want this to be about getting to the truth. Republicans are also playing politics with this as well. And they think that if this gets delay it will also drive out their base. You have Lindsey Graham out there saying, you know, Kavanaugh has been the victim of a drive by shooting, and say listen to the lady but we've got to move on. Everyone needs to handle this very carefully in the next week. And my point about Donald Trump was this is very delicate. The Republicans on the hill who are up for re-election this year do not want to play this wrong. They saw what happened in '92 after the Anita Hill hearing. The first year of the woman when women came out to vote in droves, in large part, because of this, they don't want Donald Trump, given his history and his baggage, to screw up the dance they're trying to do right now to take this seriously and get to the truth.
PERINO: But, you know, I do want to bring this up because, Greg, in Minnesota, we've talked about Keith Ellison and the accusations against him, right? So a new poll was conducted, the Minnesota Star Tribune and Minnesota public radio news find that only 5 percent of Democrats in Minnesota believe the allegations of emotional and physical abuse leveled against Representative Ellison who is the DNC's deputy chair. Feels a little bit like double standard.
GUTFELD: Yeah. Sadly, team sport politics infects everything. It infects the clothes you wear now. It infects politics. It infects sports. Infects entertainment. And now it's polluting and poisoning relationships between genders. I mean, the fact is, we do -- I think men and women both want to get to the truth. But, if you point out the possibility that this is a murky uncorroborated story and that the male might be innocent, then you will see people in the media say things like, um, what is that person hiding? So that -- what that does is keeps people from actually speaking out. You can be legitimately scared of being falsely accused and not have due process. You should be scared of that. But what people will say to you, no, you're not scared of that, you're scared of what you did that summer. What did you do when you were in high school? And that has everybody going like -- but I'm just saying, imagine if all men and all women said enough. You can't operate on the politics of a personal destruction, OK? We want to get to the truth. But we're seeing how this goes. And we see that we're all vulnerable. So, you know, sensible Americans believe in justice and due process, and we're not seeing it.
PERINO: All right, Democrats already have a plan to unseat Kavanaugh if he gets confirmed, believe or not. We'll have the details next. Plus, sending new reports out of Washington saying Rod Rosenstein suggest he'd secretly recording President Trump.
HARF: Democrats with eyes on retaking control of congress promising to continue investigating Brett Kavanaugh even if he is confirmed to the Supreme Court.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
SEN, SHELDON WHITEHOUSE, D-RHODE ISLAND: There's a whole investigative process that can and should take place. And you know what? This is such bad practice that even if they were to ram this guy through, as soon as Democrats get gavels, we're going to want to get to the bottom of this. You can't ignore a crime victim's claim that something happened, refuse to investigate, throw her up into the stand without the least bit of support for her, without the least bit of effort to corroborate what she says, and then walk away from that as if you've behaved at all properly.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
HARF: And the New York Times getting a lot of attention for this op-ed making the case for impeaching Kavanaugh if he gets to sit on the high court. OK, Jesse.
HARF: It seems like there's a long list of things Democrats want to investigate if we -- if and when we take the house back in November. Do you think this is a real serious threat or just an empty threat?
WATTERS: Well, he's a liar because he doesn't want.
HARF: Who? Kavanaugh?
WATTERS: No, Whitehouse. He doesn't want to investigate. They -- Democrats on the committee had their chance to investigate and go behind closed doors and interview Brett Kavanaugh, and they were invited by the majority senate Republicans on the judiciary committee and they abstained. And now they're complaining? And they say they want to investigate? Well, you had your chance. You're obviously not an honest broker in this process. They're also doing it to rally the base, obviously. And, who knows? You know, if they do win the house or the senate, anything can happen. It's all on the table, impeachment not only of Kavanaugh but of President Trump. And I just think -- he was speaking the truth there. I think they're honestly going to go all in on this administration. All in.
HARF: Dana, do you think this -- I mean, Democratic voters are very fired up. We've seen that the base is very excited to vote. How do you think that message plays -- we're what? Forty five days to the midterms?
PERINO: Well, repeatedly what voters say what they want is they want Washington to get stuff done.
PERINO: If you are campaigning on only doing investigations of the president and his administration, that spells one word, and it's gridlock. So, you don't actually get to what the voters say they want. It might be what the Democratic base wants. It might be something that they want, you know, they want to fight. But it's interesting is how the Democrats seem to be flailing because they know that for three decades the conservatives worked together to figure out a way to find really good nominees like Brett Kavanaugh, and Neil Gorsuch, and John Roberts, and Justice Alito, and Amy Coney Barrett. I mean, there are -- there is a pipeline of excellent conservative judges and the Democrats have blown this issue off. They didn't care. So instead of actually winning elections so that they could put somebody on the court, they just want to impeach and investigate, which is pretty unsatisfying, especially if you want to go to Washington and do some good stuff.
HARF: Greg, I think that we also hear from voters that they want some accountability from the Trump administration. That they don't feel like the Republicans in congress are doing much oversight of the Trump administration, which I would agree with. But what to do make of this.
WATTERS: Oversight? I mean, we have been subpoenaing the DOJ and FBI all year.
HARF: We're going to get to DOJ in a second. But they haven't done -- I mean, compared to the kind of oversight they provided to the administration I worked in it feels different. Let's put it that way.
GUTFELD: It's a very transparent administration, Marie. I'll say that first. Let's investigate Kavanaugh after he's confirmed because then, your party would be able to prove that this merely wasn't political. That if they really believe this and they believe it with all their heart they should investigate him. They should go for him after he's been confirmed. Because if he gets confirmed, and then you never hear about this story again, what do you know? You know that it was a hundred political. And while we're investigating, you know who else should be investigated? Who was the person that had a Chinese spy for 20 years as a driver?
GUTFELD: Yeah, Dianne. While that was happening, her husband got rich in China, it was like an honorary consul or something. That's max. I mean, 20 year driver who was a spy. I think Dianne Feinstein should be investigated as well.
WATTERS: Here, here.
GUTFELD: All right. Solved a lot of problems here.
HARF: That is a very interesting theory that if Democrats were really not just being partisan they will actually continue investigating even if he's confirmed. Morgan, what say you?
ORTAGUS: So, interestingly, I was talking to someone at one of the Republican committees about the polling, and typically what you see whenever you have a party that's controlling the White House and congress, voters tend to want to vote another party in power so that there's a check and balance, right? This is natural in the process. What the pollster told me is that while that there is an element of that that's happening with independents, what happened is because the Democrats are running people that are so far extreme to the left, wanting to abolish ICE, socialism for all.
HARF: In some districts, not in all.
ORTAGUS: But the point being is that that natural tendency of the independent to go towards the Democrat is now tempered by the fact that they know that voters don't actually want impeachment when you poll them. They don't want all of these ongoing investigations. They certainly don't want impeachment of Trump, much less a Supreme Court justice. So I actually think that Democrats do themselves a disservice for the midterms whenever they run on this. First of all, it's incredibly easy for the president to rev up his base. Whenever he say, look, they're not even to impeach me. They're going to try to impeach Kavanaugh. To me it's like a ready-made campaign ad right there.
HARF: Well, interestingly, Kavanaugh has really low approval ratings for a Supreme Court nominee. So.
PERINO: Well, they've gone down in the last week.
HARF: Before that. Even before this allegation they were historically low for a Supreme Court nominee. But we will see how that plays out. We will continue watching next week, will be crazy. In the meantime, bombshell reports rocking Washington this afternoon, Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein reportedly suggested secretly taping President Trump. The breaking details just in to Fox next. Stay tuned.
ORTAGUS: New report is sending shock waves across Washington. According to the New York Times and the Washington Post, Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein suggested secretly recording President Trump, and also discussed invoking the 25th amendment to remove Trump from office, those allegations reportedly coming from memos written by former FBI director -- Deputy Director Andrew McCabe. Rosenstein is calling the New York Times story inaccurate and factually incorrect. And senior DOJ official is telling Fox News that Rosenstein was only joking about wearing a wire during a heated exchange with McCabe.
So, Dana, what was interesting to me, when I started really digging into this New York Times piece is, again, we have memos coming out of the FBI. So, what they're saying is that McCabe left these meetings with Rosenstein and potentially briefed other people or wrote memos himself that detailed the discussions of what Rosenstein said, which made me think does Rosenstein even know about these memos? And it's interesting to me the bureaucratic pattern of writing a memo the minute that you get out of a meeting that seems to undermine whoever is in office.
PERINO: Yes. We know that Andy McCabe and Lisa Page both wrote notes afterwards. They were both in that said meeting. But I thought it was very interesting is that all these signs point to that McCabe is the source. And Matthew Miller, who worked at the Justice Department, spokesperson under Obama, the tweet that came out as soon as this story broke and he read it said Andrew McCabe is playing a very dangerous game here. He is under threat of indictment for lying to federal investigators. And so, you know, if he wants to see if he can try this in a court of public opinion, I think he's probably going to lose. As I understand it, and we've read from our Justice Department senior officials -- I'm sorry, our producers that talked to justice department senior officials that they were in a heated argument. This is right after Comey is going to get fired. Rosenstein had written the draft letter.
PERINO: Then he finds out it's going forward and that they're in a heated argument and that the wire comment was said in jest. It wasn't meant to be serious. But McCabe wants to bring Rosenstein down, so that's his goal.
ORTAGUS: So, Marie, it was interesting to me that not only does the New York Times have these memos, the New York Times reported that the special counsel, actually, has these memos. What do you think? Is there any relevance here? What do you think the special counsel could be doing with these memos?
HARF: I have no idea what the special counsel is doing with them, except for the fact that one of the mandates was to look into obstruction of justice and the Comey firing, and if there's evidence as reported in the Times that Rosenstein did not -- was surprised when President Trump blamed Rosenstein so much or put all the onus on him for having fired Comey and he was furious about it, that's probably part of that investigation. When I first read the story, I thought someone leaked this because they want Rosenstein to get fired by President Trump. But I think they want Trump to fire Rosenstein to prompt what some people say could be some sort of constitutional crisis. And this is like a weird.
PERINO: To fire Sessions as well.
HARF: Exactly. Like to start -- do like a Saturday night massacre in slow motion. And so, I don't know who leaked this but that was the first thing I thought when I read it. I thought Rosenstein is going to get fired because of this, whether or not he did it. And that will set in motion something I think is going to be very nasty with very uncertain ending. Look, if it's true that he was serious, I think that says something about President Trump, but we have no clue. I don't go around making jokes about the 25th amendment. I don't think it's particularly funny. Like we have people pushing back saying that's what he did. Do you think Rosenstein will get fired?
PERINO: No, I think he was -- well, I don't know. Is it Monday? Ask me, Monday.
ORTAGUS: But, Jesse, when I read this I thought, you know, what the president has done to these senior FBI leadership, the political leadership, I'm not talking about the rank and file, that he's essentially punched a hornets nest, right? And I think what you're seeing here is a political leadership across various intel agencies and across the FBI that, I think, quite literally have it out for the president and they're going to do it in their bureaucratic way, right? Like, if it's writing a memo and preserving it and giving it to the special counsel they're flaming mad at him.
WATTERS: Yeah. These hornets were stinging him in the campaign, so he punched the whole nests. And now that's why we have such a mess. I guess there's two ways to look at it. You can look at it this was a leak from McCabe, and he's got an ax to grind and he's trying save his skin because he's getting pressure from the feds and he's facing time, or you can look at it like, hey, maybe there's some truth to this because, remember, the last time Rod Rosenstein was accused of threatening senate staffers to investigate them and turn them inside out, it came out, oh, yeah, he was misinterpreted, that's not exactly what he said. So we've been through this before. And we know that McCabe is a leaker. I mean, that's on the record. He's already known to be a leaker.
So, if it's true that he was conspiring Rod Rosenstein in any way against the president, and if you look at the article, it says he was paranoid. He was frazzled after Comey was fired. He didn't know what was going on. That was the mental state that he was in when he appointed Mueller to be special counsel. So that adds a little intrigue about that and it raises a lot of doubts about his mental state during that too. Remember, he also signed off on every single FISA application. He also has been foot-dragging on all the document requests from the DOJ. And when he went out there and testified on Capitol Hill, he did not come across well. He came across as squirrely like Strzok did and people didn't really like the way he presented himself. So he's a villain in Trump world, and Trump world is going to look at this and say this guy needs to get axed fast.
ORTAGUS: Greg, do you think that anyone cared what happened a year ago? Have we sort of been overtaken by events --
ORTAGUS: -- at this point?
GUTFELD: Yes. First off, can you get a picture of him next to me, Rod Rosenstein, for a minute? Can you just do a side by side of, like, a close-up of his face? I know you have, like, a -- I'm older than him.
GUTFELD: I just want to point out that I'm older than that fellow.
WATTERS: How old is he?
GUTFELD: I am incredibly depressed. All right.
I disagree with everything that Jesse said. That doesn't happen very often. I think Donald Trump should be incredibly sympathetic with Rod Rosenstein. Because what happened to Rod is what has been happening to Trump since Trump became president, which is taking things that are meant sarcastically or as a joke as real or truth or literally. We have learned that has been a problem with the press, whether it's Bob --
WATTERS: Couldn't have happened to a better person, I've got to tell you.
GUTFELD: I've got to say, I'm telling you --
WATTERS: He deserved it, then. He's not a bit (UNINTELLIGIBLE).
GUTFELD: I think the context of it was he said, "What do you want me to do, wear a wire?" That is not serious? That is sarcasm.
And we are living in a world -- and Jesse, you should be agreeing with me. We're living in a world where humor and sarcasm no longer flies, and neither does context. How many times have you made a joke -- let me finish. How many times have you made a joke, and somebody on a blog says, "Aha! He said so and so is a witch." And they take it out -- this is what is -- this is the world.
WATTERS: He's a humorless person, and we saw that at the hearing.
GUTFELD: Oh, I think he looks like --
WATTERS: I don't think that --
GUTFELD: There were laughs.
WATTERS: -- guy's got a funny sense of humor at all.
GUTFELD: No, but OK, this goes back to the other thing. There's a large percentage of the population who can't tell a joke. Not take a joke but tell a joke from something else. You may -- you may not -- that's not a joke. You may not be able to tell.
PERINO: Also, you have a very different job. Like, you have a public-facing job where you are funny, and that is your job.
PERINO: Like, Brett Kavanaugh is actually very funny.
PERINO: He was not funny in the hearing. But that's not his job. His job is to be serious.
WATTERS: I understand that. But you have to separate the two instances. One is the instance where he was joking about the wire. And I'm willing to say, you know what? Maybe that was a joke in the heat of the moment.
McCabe also claims in his memo -- and you can you whatever McCabe says in the memo with a grain of salt -- that he did say that he wanted to invoke the 25th Amendment, and that was not a joke. And those were separate instances, and if that's --
GUTFELD: You don't know that.
WATTERS: -- a joke, that's not funny.
PERINO: Actually --
GUTFELD: You don't know that.
WATTERS: I'm going to write a memo after the segment, and it's going to be memorialized. And I'm going to say Gutfeld is a total --
PERINO: I have memos.
ORTAGUS: All right, guys. Anti-Trump filmmaker Michael Moore, my favorite -- not really -- with a promise that will make many Republicans happy. That and more in "The Fastest Seven," up next.
(MUSIC: PARLIAMENT'S "THEME FROM THE BLACK HOLE")
WATTERS: You guys love that song.
Welcome back. Time for "The Fastest Seven."
GRAPHIC: The Fastest 7
WATTERS: All right. First up, don't let the door hit you on the way out. Liberal movie maker Michael Moore grows the growing list of anti-Trump Hollywood celebrities threatening to flee the United States.
The Democrat director tells reporters he'll move to Canada if he gets too much backlash for bashing President Trump in his new documentary "Fahrenheit 11/9," which opens today.
GUTFELD: No clip!
WATTERS: Here's a clip.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
DONALD TRUMP (R), PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES: Stop resisting.
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: The president's powers here are beyond crushing.
MICHAEL MOORE, FILMMAKER: Ladies and gentlemen, the last president of the United States.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
WATTERS: Gutfeld's already got his tickets.
GUTFELD: Hey, I'm worried about this. If he leaves the country, we're going to have to rearrange America. It's like baggage on a plane. When you get on a small plane, you've got to have the balance of the plane.
GUTFELD: If he leaves the country, we're going to see some major problems.
WATTERS: That's not nice, Greg.
GUTFELD: What are you talking about? The things he says about Republicans, the things he says about average --
WATTERS: When they go low we go high.
GUTFELD: Not me. I'm -- I'm born low.
WATTERS: Speaking of, Dana.
PERINO: I -- thank you. I think -- first of all, he says that he can't take the criticism. He's just a typical snowflake. But I would say, if he's going to move to Canada, Quebec City is quite lovely.
WATTERS: Quite lovely this time of year.
MARIE HARF, CO-HOST: No, don't do that to Canada. I love Canada. Don't do that to --
GUTFELD: Canada is like, "No, you have him. We don't want him."
HARF: No, they're the nicest people.
ORTAGUS: The only thing I have to say is #ByeFelicia.
WATTERS: Oh! See you later.
WATTERS: Up next, looks like this guy is up in the running for father of the year. A Massachusetts teacher in legal hot water over this video. Police are charging him for appearing to use his toddler to steal toys and prizes out of a claw machine out at a New Hampshire mall. Oh, man, I wonder if -- I mean, those claw machines are difficult, Greg. I mean --
GUTFELD: You know what? Finally --
WATTERS: -- you never win.
GUTFELD: Finally, kids are good for something. But what a -- what a waste of an idea. Like, you're not going to be able to sell these toys on the black market. Use the kid to crawl through the window of a liquor store or a pawnshop. What a waste of an investment.
WATTERS: Yes, like a nice gold watch or something like that.
PERINO: I -- I personally thought it was good father-son time. I mean, you want parents to be spending more time with their children --
WATTERS: That's right.
PERINO: -- anyway they can get it.
GUTFELD: You use the dog door at your own apartment.
WATTERS: Get a little fuzzy dice, hang it on the rearview mirror. Right?
HARF: As someone who spends a lot of time in New Hampshire, I absolutely believe this happened. They're live or die, man.
WATTERS: Wow. If you live in New Hampshire, e-mail Marie Harf.
HARF: I love New Hampshire. Love.
GUTFELD: They don't have e-mail. They just fire -- they use a gun. The message on a bullet.
WATTERS: That's right.
PERINO: What don't you like? You love Canada; you love New Hampshire.
HARF: Well, they're similar. New Hampshire and Canada are similar.
ORTAGUS: Listen, if I ever -- I hope to never go to jail. If I do, it's certainly not going to be stealing out of a game machine. Like, I'm going to go big. Steal something awesome.
WATTERS: Go big or go home.
WATTERS: All right. And finally, the Cleveland Browns hadn't won a football game in 635 days, until last night by beating -- guess who? -- the Jets, of course. Sorry.
And lots of fans are crediting this little guy for the victory.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: (UNINTELLIGIBLE) possum. (EXPLETIVE DELETED) possum.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
WATTERS: Cleveland, that's disgusting. Nobody's even sure how he got in there, but according to a Browns spokesperson, the possum was humanely released outside the stadium.
PERINO: No, why?
WATTERS: Come on, Cleveland.
GUTFELD: The real story is how delicious he was. Well-done, salt and pepper, some horse radish. My motto is don don't toss them, eat possum.
WATTERS: It goes with your diet.
GUTFELD: It does. Protein, no carbs.
PERINO: I am worried that the Browns won't be able to have that charity parade at the end of the season --
PERINO: -- that they've had when they've had, like, a season when they've done terribly. Do you know the one I'm talking about?
WATTERS: Yes, you probably sound like you know what I'm talking about?
PERINO: You know what I'm talking about.
HARF: Yes, I did it as a "One More Thing" last year.
WATTERS: Did they open up all the beer? Is that what they were doing?
HARF: No, what happens, possums are everywhere in Ohio. I grew up there. When I turned 16, I got a Dodge Neon. I was driving home from the car dealership, and I hit a possum the first day I got my brand-new Dodge.
ORTAGUS: Did you stop?
HARF: I was -- I was, like, crying. Anyways, this is typical for Ohio. Also, go Browns.
PERINO: Wait. Can you defend me, please? There is a parade.
HARF: Yes. Oh, yes. Last year when they didn't win a game, they had the loser parade --
HARF: -- to raise money for charity.
GUTFELD: "Loser parade," sounds like the resistance.
WATTERS: You know about those parades, right? You worked for Obama.
HARF: He won twice!
ORTAGUS: I don't know anything about sports unless they're married to a Kardashian.
HARF: There's one of those in Cleveland.
GUTFELD: It's true!
WATTERS: All right. Well, Greg's going to dress up as a Kardashian next. "Fan Mail Friday."
GUTFELD: Polka! It's "Fan Mail Friday." Let's get to your questions.
All right. Let's start with Dana, from @FrenchieFirecracker.
WATTERS: Every week.
GUTFELD: Yes. "What things do you do every day that you wish could be automated?"
PERINO: I would love for someone to be able to make my Carnation instant breakfast and English breakfast tea so that Peter didn't have to do it. Like, if he was out of town, a machine could do it; that would be great.
GUTFELD: Well, that's interesting, replace a man. All right, Jesse.
WATTERS: First of all, I'd like @FrenchieFirecracker to send a photo next time so we know what this person looks like. I mean, she's every week, Greg.
GUTFELD: How do you know it's a she?
WATTERS: Frenchie -- does Frenchie have a friend?
WATTERS: Automated? Probably prep for the show. It would save me so much time every afternoon.
GUTFELD: Yes, 10 minutes.
WATTERS: Very funny. Hours.
GUTFELD: Hours of prep. Marie.
HARF: I'm really old-school, and I hate -- like, I hate when you go to the airport and you have to use the iPad to order. And there's no one there. I hate automation. I want things to go back the other way. I hate -- like I --
WATTERS: You want bank tellers.
WATTERS: You don't like ATMs?
WATTERS: You want --
GUTFELD: I do like bank tellers.
HARF: I can cash a check on my phone.
GUTFELD: No fun robbing an ATM.
HARF: I still print out tickets in paper. I don't -- I don't want any of it.
ORTAGUS: I feel like everything in my life is automated, living in New York. I order Seamless. I order my groceries online. I order my Uber.
HARF: I hate all that.
WATTERS: You want to flag a taxi?
GUTFELD: All right. I'm going to --
HARF: That's what I do.
GUTFELD: You guys are such -- the obvious answer here is shaving.
HARF: That's a good answer.
GUTFELD: It's so hard to reach my back. But anyway, it's like -- if you want to -- wouldn't that be great, to just get rid of shaving once and for all? You just walk in a machine and goes like this. Like that.
ORTAGUS: It's called laser hair removal.
GUTFELD: I'm not going to have that.
This is good. This is from Gary W. I'm drooling. "What was your Spartacus moment" -- Jesse.
ORTAGUS: What does that mean?
WATTERS: I think, honestly, when I went in front of the city council in San Francisco --
WATTERS: -- and I shamed them about what they did with the sanctuary city policy.
PERINO: Yes, I agree.
WATTERS: That was a big moment for me.
GUTFELD: It was -- I think it was a big moment for America.
WATTERS: Let's not get carried away.
GUTFELD: Morgan, do you have a Spartacus moment?
ORTAGUS: I don't --
GUTFELD: Based upon -- what's this guy's name?
WATTERS: Cory Booker.
PERINO: Cory Booker.
ORTAGUS: Oh, Cory Booker.
WATTERS: Remember, he said, "This is my Spartacus moment?"
ORTAGUS: Yes. No, I remember it, and I've never been that obnoxious. No. I don't have a -- no, maybe. I mean, when I was sworn into the Navy, it was like a really proud day for me. Does that count?
GUTFELD: That's a Spartacus moment. I think so. Yes.
ORTAGUS: Go women in the Navy.
GUTFELD: Yes. Marie.
HARF: I think it's like 10 minutes ago on this show. That's mine.
GUTFELD: That's great.
HARF: C-block, about.
All right. What about you, Dana? What was yours?
PERINO: I am -- the only thing that comes to mind is a tussle I had with Helen Thomas. Do you remember Helen Thomas?
GUTFELD: Oh, yes.
PERINO: When I was press secretary she suggested -- now, she has passed away, so R.I.P. But at the time, she suggested that our soldiers were purposely attacking innocent civilians in Iraq and Afghanistan; and I'd had enough, so I had a moment.
GUTFELD: Yes, I think I remember that moment.
WATTERS: We should pull that tape.
GUTFELD: My Spartacus moment was when I won that chariot race.
PERINO: In the toga? In the toga?
GUTFELD: Nothing else.
WATTERS: The back hair coming out of that.
GUTFELD: Yes. I'm not even going to say who this is from. OK, but this is a great question.
GRAPHIC: "@FrenchiWorld. If you were chosen to go on "Survivor/Amazing Race", who would you pick at Fox News to be your partner in crime"
GUTFELD: "If you were chosen to go on a 'Survivor'/'Amazing Race' --"
WATTERS: She used an alias.
GUTFELD: Yes, I should --- it's probably somebody on --
PERINO: She's a producer.
GUTFELD: It's probably somebody on the staff.
HARF: It's actually Dana.
GUTFELD: OK. Question. "If you were chosen to go on 'Survivor,' amazing -- or slash "'Amazing Race,' who would you pick at Fox News to be your partner in crime?"
PERINO: I've got it
ORTAGUS: OK, I was going to say Dagen McDowell.
HARF: I love Dagen.
ORTAGUS: Dagen would, like -- Dagen would, like, kill an animal, skin it, whatever -- like, you needed to do. She'd shave her head if you need to. Like Dagen.
PERINO: I would say Bill Hemmer.
PERINO: Because, you know, he knows every place in America.
PERINO: You know when we do election night. He knows every single county.
He's got great geographical skills.
GUTFELD: Fantastic. Very pragmatic choice. Jesse.
WATTERS: I would go with Ed Henry.
WATTERS: I was going to go with Pete Hegseth, because I think he's really athletic and, you know, he was in the military. But then I always watch "Fox & Friends Weekend," and Ed Henry always beats -- always beats Pete Hegseth in all the athletic endeavors. So I'm going to go with Ed Henry.
PERINO: They should challenge you to come in on a Saturday.
WATTERS: Work a weekend?
HARF: I think Katie Pavlich, man. She is tough.
WATTERS: She's gun-toting.
PERINO: And she is certified.
HARF: Exactly. I'm taking her with me. This liberal's taking her with me.
GUTFELD: I'm trying to think who would have the best pharmaceuticals? So I was going to go -- I was going to go with Dr. Siegel.
HARF: I don't think he --
GUTFELD: Dr. Siegel -- but he's also -- he's very tough. He's not going to give it to me.
So it has to be somebody old but so that I can take them from them. I'm just going to go with Rick Leventhal, because he's sexy.
WATTERS: All right.
PERINO: Why not take Tyrus?
GUTFELD: Tyrus. That would be good.
PERINO: He'd do anything you want.
GUTFELD: You know why? Because if there's -- let's say there's -- we're on a deserted island and there's a fight. He's going to kill me, because he can. He's like -- there's no way.
PERINO: He could run.
GUTFELD: He could probably outrun me. The guy works out every day.
ORTAGUS: Yes, Dagen --
GUTFELD: This is a quick one: "Do you remember your first drink and what was it?" Marie.
HARF: I think it was -- I think it was, like Kahlua. Like a White Russian, sort of.
GUTFELD: Yes, that's a first drink.
ORTAGUS: Amaretto Sour.
GUTFELD: Hmm. That's very mature for what age?
GUTFELD: Trick question. Jesse.
WATTERS: Either beer or Screwdriver.
PERINO: Rum and Coke and never had one since.
GUTFELD: Wow, you don't like it. You throw up a lot?
GUTFELD: Yes, your first drink is that. You know what my first one? Altar boy wine. Yes. I don't remember that picnic, thank God.
All right. "One More Thing" is up next.
PERINO: It's time now for "One More Thing." I'm going to go first.
I got to go to a great movie premiere last night. You have to put this on your list. It's called "Free Solo." And it is a National Geographic documentary. It profiles rock climber Alex Honnold on his quest to perform a free solo climb of El Capitan. You see it there. That's a 3,000-foot rock formation in Yosemite National Park.
He does this without ropes. Just his fingers and just amazing strength. There's a little bit of a love story in it, as well. I thought that the movie was unbelievable. I do feel it should be seen on the big screen.
The film's star, director and producer held a Q&A afterwards. It's just a range of emotions. My husband was completely sweating because he doesn't like heights. Take a look at this clip.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
UNIDENTIFIED MALE: People know a little bit about rock climbing. They're like, "Oh, he's totally safe." And then people who really know exactly what he's doing are freaked out.
(END VIDEO CLIP)
PERINO: So I highly recommend "Free Solo" to everybody.
GUTFELD: On the big screen, you said? Which for you is an iPhone.
GRAPHIC: Greg's Travel News
GUTFELD: "Greg's Travel News." As you know, my book is selling like hot cakes, and we know hot cakes sell really fast. People are sending me videos of themselves racing to the bookstore, because it's selling out.
(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)
(HAMSTERS IN TINY MOTORIZED CARS)
(END VIDEO CLIP)
GUTFELD: This a video from these -- these are actually twin fellows. They live together.
WATTERS: Are they possums?
GUTFELD: No, I think they're just guys who like to hang out together. Anyway, they're racing to the local Barnes and Noble to get the book, and they're about four months away. They don't like to fly.
PERINO: Well, probably it won't be sold out by the time they get there. I mean, if they are selling like hot cakes.
GUTFELD: Sorry that's not a guy climbing a mountain.
PERINO: Do you have a show?
GUTFELD: Yes. "The Greg Gutfeld Show," 10 p.m. Saturday. Thank you.
My God. I'm blanking on the name.
WATTERS: That's a promo.
GUTFELD: There's Jed -- Jedediah. There's Rob Long, Kat, Tyrus.
Thank you so much. I totally forgot.
PERINO: It's going to be a great show.
GUTFELD: It's going to be amazing.
PERINO: There's going to be another great show at 8 p.m. -- Jesse.
WATTERS: All right. So sparks were flying in England, because they were watching "Watters' World." We can get now Fox News in England, and look at the electrical cables blowing up this neighborhood. They just turned on "Watters' World," and look what happened.
And you want to know why? This is why. Eight o'clock, this Saturday night, all-star lineup. Get ready for this. Brace yourself, Gutfeld. Lou Dobbs!
WATTERS: Ben Shapiro!
WATTERS: Diamond and Silk! Tomi Lahren! Are you on the show? You're coming on, right?
HARF: Yes, I'm on the show.
WATTERS: We couldn't fit your face on there.
WATTERS: Your face is very big. I can only fit five.
HARF: And Diamond and Silk.
WATTERS: And -- and we have an alien abductee, willing to share his stories with us.
GUTFELD: So Doocy's coming on.
PERINO: Marie, you're next.
HARF: OK. For all you nature lovers out there, this one's for you. Florida-based company See Through Canoe hosting a video showing the moment one of their clear-bottom canoes gets stuck. Take a look there. It got stuck on an alligator, on the alligator's back. Look at that.
PERINO: Oh, my goodness.
HARF: Company reps say the alligator stayed there, quote, "for what seemed like forever." When the gator finally backed up, the canoe moved with him for a few feet before he eventually disappeared.
This does not look fun to me.
HARF: And I am a nature lover. I do not --
PERINO: No. The canoe doesn't look deep enough for me.
HARF: Or solid enough. I'm not into that.
PERINO: OK, Morgan.
ORTAGUS: OK. So I'm very excited tomorrow. I'm helping host a brunch for one of my best girlfriends, Jenna Edwards, former Miss Florida USA. She started a charity 18 years ago for kids that have cancer.
And so what she does is she goes into hospitals around the country; and she does queen for a day or she does king for a day with the little boys. And they -- she dresses them. She started by giving away giving away her pageant tiaras, whenever she was a beauty queen in the South. And she would give them away to little girls. And what she found out was that all of these cancer treatments are, of course, hard on them physically but also really hard mentally and emotionally for them.
So I'm so proud to be helping Jenna with the "For a Day" charity tomorrow. If you're in New York City, you can come join us for brunch, and we're going to be helping children with cancer.
PERINO: That's a really important charity.
Greg, do you have one more question?
GUTFELD: What habit would you like to break, Dana?
(DANA TAPS THE TABLE)
GUTFELD: Tapping the table.
PERINO: Yes. Skip.
WATTERS: I don't have a lot of bad habits. Do you disagree?
PERINO: No, I'm just laughing, because I can't think of one.
HARF: I spend too much time on my phone.
PERINO: That's a good one.
HARF: Phone time.
ORTAGUS: I'm very messy. My husband is here. He'll tell you. I'm, like, incredibly messy.
PERINO: Really? I'm surprised about that.
GUTFELD: I don't think so.
GUTFELD: What habit I'd like to break? Helping people.
PERINO: Yes, you do a lot of that.
GUTFELD: Taking up a lot of my time. I do a lot of helping people.
PERINO: All right. That's it for us. We'll see you back here on Monday. "Special Report" is up next. There's a lot of news to talk about.
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