Advice for Alex Ovechkin ahead of his next milestone moment

Dec 16, 2016; Raleigh, NC, USA; Washington Capitals forward Alex Ovechkin (8) looks on during the game against the Carolina Hurricanes at PNC Arena. The Washington Capitals defeated the Carolina Hurricanes 4-3 in the shoot out. Mandatory Credit: James Guillory-USA TODAY Sports

Have some sense of the moment, Ovi.

The game between the Washington Capitals and the Pittsburgh Penguins on Wednesday night was a big one -- not only a matching up of two of the best teams in the NHL, but the night when Alex Ovechkin would go for his 1,000th career NHL point.

The stage was set. The moment was there.

...and Ovechkin scored a goal 35 seconds into regulation.

Talk about a letdown. Thirty five seconds! Not even a minute in. The arena was half full, as people were still making their way to the Verizon Center after work. Most fans were trying to get to their seats. There was no chance for drama to build. No anticipation of the great moment. The ref dropped the puck and he put it in the net. I had planned to watch it on TV and hadn't even flipped over in time.

Listen I'm all for that ruthless efficiency normally. But on special nights, Ovi, give us a little drama. This was like going to a five-star restaurant, sitting down, and having the waiter jam a steak in my mouth. Let me savor the meal.

Next time: Have some consideration for history, Ovechkin. Jeez.

(Please Capitals fans for the love of all that is holy, realize that this entire post is a joke. Ovi is great. You're all great. Don't yell at me on Twitter.)