Slowly your pulse begins to rise. Then you start to sweat. Soon your body gives way to the rhythm. Your mind wanders. You can feel the adrenaline racing through your body. A warm sensation rushes out from your center. You feel happy in a way that few other things make you feel. And you’re more in the moment than you could have ever imagined.
No, it’s not sex; it’s dancing. And it doesn’t matter what kind or whom you’re with or whether you’re any good at it. The only thing that matters is moving. Swaying from side to side. Shaking your hips. Thrusting and shimmying and making all of the movements that our bodies long for and that we generally restrain ourselves from. And therein lies the problem and the secret.
The problem is this: We keep our bodies still so much of the time, working, reading, driving, watching television. We no longer feel connected to our own bodies. And it’s awfully hard to feel sexy in your own skin when you hardly have the chance to stretch out in it.
And if you don’t feel sexy, it’s less likely that you’ll feel like jumping your partner’s bones. You might even be sending out a "hands off" vibe without even knowing it.
The secret is this: Moving your body — even in non-sexual ways — increases your drive to engage it in sexual ways. I don’t mean ballet or jazz or tap, although that can do it for some people too. I’m talking about dancing like no one’s watching (even if they are). Who cares what anyone else thinks? If they knew the side benefits you were reaping, they’d be shaking their groove thing too.
Classes like Nia or Zumba or hip-hop get you moving around and focus less on the technical and more on the creative or, dare I say it, spiritual. And whether you’re participating or simply supporting your partner to participate, you will be amazed at what a few turns on the dance floor can awaken in nearly anyone.
The reasons are simple:
1. The high you get from raising your heart rate is addictive. Once you get it on the dance floor, you’ll want to get it on in the bedroom.
2. Muscle memory is a powerful thing. Dancing can bring on some very sensual movements. Start doing it on a regular basis and things will flow better than ever in the bedroom.
3. Dancing makes you very aware of your own body. It can be easy to forget our own sexy assets. But moving them around can spark your memory, especially if a mirror is nearby. And once you’re in tune with your own body, your partner will want to be too.
And if it’s something you and your partner choose to do together, the results will be even better. Spending the night out, your bodies touching, your breath short, your muscles engaged — it can be a very powerful thing. And as turned on as you might be, you can go only so far, making the anticipation of returning home all the greater.
But whether dancing around your living room alone, checking out a local studio with a friend, or hitting the dance floor at a local club with your partner, the result is the same – better sex and more of it. No talent or experience required. All you have to do is get into the groove and you’ll be getting your groove on in no time!
Jenny Block is a freelance writer based in Dallas, Texas. She is the author of "Open: Love, Sex, and Life in an Open Marriage." Her work appears in "One Big Happy Family" edited by Rebecca Walker and "It’s a Girl: Women Writers on Raising Daughters" edited by Andrea Buchanan. Visit her Web site at www.jennyonthepage.com.