Kim Kardashian's Wintry 'Furkini,' The Dead Rabbit's Thunderbolt Cocktail, and Much, Much More

Here's all the gossip that's fit to summarize:

On Tuesday, Kim shared three snapshots of herself in a "furkini" while playing in the snow. We don't yet know how we feel about her furry style, but at least she's taking the proper precautions against hypothermia.

Could anybody else use a stiff drink right about now? We've got just the thing: the Thunderbolt from the Dead Rabbit in NYC. Check out the video above to see award-winning bartender Jack McGarry mix up this Irish twist on an Old Fashioned, then read

And now back to Kim, because as the old saying goes, when it rains (Kim Kardashian's cleavage) it pours (Kim Kardashian's cleavage): Kim also released the cover art for upcoming book of selfies, and as we probably should have guessed, it's basically a picture of her gargantuan breasts (below). We don't know what we were expecting, though. We guess we thought she was somehow gonna work her gargantuan butt in there, too?

Comedy Central has scheduled an official Comedy Central Roast of Justin Bieber. And weirder still, Bieber himself has reportedly been asking for this opportunity "for years," maybe because he — like us — is really curious to see what Jeffrey Ross looks like dressed as Selena Gomez.

"Fifty Shades of Grey" actress Dakota Johnson told Vogue that "a large part of [her] would be perfectly happy" to trade her fame for a life of anonymity on a ranch. But seeing as her movie isn't out yet, and we can't pick her face out of a lineup, that could technically be arranged.

After filing a petition to obtain a pardon for attacking a Vietnamese man in 1988, Mark Wahlberg is now facing backlash from another victim of a racially motivated attack in 1986, when he reportedly threw rocks and yelled slurs at a group of black 4th-graders. Man, this whole thing is really backfiring right in Wahlberg's face, isn't it?

"Weird Al" Yankovic, America's most unorthodox guy named Al, has announced an 88-stop world tour in support of his latest album, with dates set for Belgium, Norway and New Zealand. Apparently, his references to polka music, the Amish and being fat resonate across all cultures equally.

Former "Dancing With the Stars" professional Maksim Chmerkovskiy recently claimed that he lost his virginity at 16 to a supermodel in her 30s. He wouldn't name the supermodel, but it's safe to say that she's totally real, you guys. You just don't know her because she just goes to a different school across town.

According to new photos obtained by TMZ, the craft services table on the set of Will Smith's upcoming movie "Concussion" offers lobster tails, filet mignon and prime rib for lunch. In related news, enjoy that Panera salad you've got planned for lunch!

Actress and former swimsuit model Brooklyn Decker cut off her famously long hair, debuting her new shorter 'do on Instagram this Tuesday (below). She's also wearing a t-shirt with a photo of herself picking her nose, which you can buy to raise money for her charity. So it's not gross, because she was picking her boogers for a good cause, guys.

Beginning on January 24, Netflix is going to offer the controversial James Franco/Seth Rogen film "The Interview" on its streaming service. So if you missed its short run in theaters, and were too cheap to shell out for the digital release, you can finally see what all those barely mediocre reviews were talking about this Saturday.

And finally, if you haven't seen it yet, the internet is up in arms over the obviously fake baby used in "American Sniper" (below), as the hashtag #FakeBaby is already picking up steam on Twitter. But to everyone criticizing the scene, also consider the fact that (spoiler alert) Bradley Cooper wasn't really shooting people in the head, either. Believe it or not, it was just a movie!