Updated

This is a rush transcript from "The Five," December 6, 2011. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

GREG GUTFELD, CO-HOST: So, Monday morning, "Fox & Friends" had a professor on to condemn Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, the claymation classic. Now, if you are unfamiliar with "Fox & Friends" -- it's a show about a group of friends who help a fox solve all sorts of mysteries.

Anyway, Professor George Giuliani pointed out that throughout the holiday staple, Rudolph is bullied, like here.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

RUDOLPH THE RED-NOSED REINDEER: Stop calling me names!

REINDEER: Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer!

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD: The professor is right, that was bad. No one should bully a reindeer, especially one so uniquely red-nosed. It's bigotry or "reindeerist," if you will.

But like most profs, he pursues his opinion while ignoring the facts, that is actually Rudolph actually prevails. At this point, to make Eric happy, I must tie this to President Obama.

We know what smacks you around makes you stronger, which explains the rise of Newt. He is this year's Rudolph, with more red-noses than a pub on St. Patrick's Day. Which shows you that protecting people from criticism only hurts them.

I mean, how has the liberal loving media helped President Obama? Not well. He has made more missteps than a tap dancer during an earthquake. But his fan-based media shielded him, which is why you got freebies (ph) when he can.

Compare that to Rudolph. Due to his triumph over bullying, no one in America actually eats reindeer. Or if they do, they call it caribou. Ironically, the nose is the best part.

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: Bob --

(LAUGHTER)

GUTFELD: Are you OK?

BOB BECKEL, CO-HOST: Why did I expect that I'd get the first one?

GUTFELD: Do you think Rudolph promotes -- Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer promotes bullying?

(LAUGHTER)

BECKEL: But that was a great monologue on your part. I don't know who the professor is and how he got bullying from that. The guy wants to see bullying, I have seen some bullying before.

Look, you're right. Rudolph comes back. He beats the crap out of the rest of these reindeers and he gets to be the leader of the pack. So, that's a good thing. I mean, bullying is beaten. What's wrong?

GUTFELD: There wasn't actually any violence in it from what I remember.

BECKEL: Oh, there wasn't? I thought there was.

GUTFELD: If you're going to condemn bullying, the point is you have to show what bullying is like in order to, you know, so kids learn.

DANA PERINO, CO-HOST: Well, the whole point of the show is to teach kids that bullying is wrong and stick up for people so that they don't get bullied and be nicer to people. And then, Rudolph ends up being the hero. That is usually the moral of the story.

BECKEL: How come nobody sticks up for me here?

GUTFELD: We all do, every day behind your back.

ANDREA TANTAROS, CO-HOST: And you were the red-nosed political strategist in the sixties.

BECKEL: I was red-nosed for a long time. I can tell you that.

TANTAROS: I was going to say, Beckel the red-red-nosed strategist.

GUTFELD: Third red-nose.

BECKEL: That's right.

TANTAROS: In '60s, '70s and '80s.

BECKEL: That's not funny. I'm going to get my third nose. Go ahead. Eric?

GUTFELD: Andrea, did you -- to show you the impact of Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, even though you saw it like every year, it still made you cry, didn't you?

TANTAROS: No.

GUTFELD: No?

PERINO: It didn't make me cry.

GUTFELD: You're a communist.

TANTAROS: I like it. I think it's a positive story. Rudolph was bullied. Santa recognized his promise with the red nose. He made him the leader of the pack. He didn't sue Santa when he was getting bullied. I mean, he approached this the right way.

PERINO: There was also the Land of the Misfit Toys.

GUTFELD: Yes.

ERIC BOLLING, CO-HOST: I have a couple of alternate stories. And basically what this is, Greg, is this is the wussification of America. The P.C. police are out in force when Rudolph is a problem.

Frosty the Snowman, maybe Frosty gets locked in a freezer and spends the whole summer in the freezer. He doesn't actually melt every year.

Scrooge -- like Bob -- isn't really that cranky. He just needs to take his medication, he comes back much more loveable.

But the little drummer boy isn't really an orphan. His parents are away at maybe some, I don't know, global warming conference in L.A. or something.

BECKEL: Did you spend a long time putting those together?

PERINO: I loved all the shows.

BECKEL: They were pretty funny, some of them.

PERINO: I used to organize my whole -- I would tell my mom like, OK, we have to be done with dinner by 6:30 because I have to get downstairs, so I can turn on the TV back in the day when you had to do it.

I just looked at Hermey up there, just to keep going on your --

BECKEL: Who's Hermey?

PERINO: Hermey is the elf who wants to be a dentist. And he kind of reminds me of Gingrich -- very policy oriented.

(CROSSTALK)

PERINO: Oh, I always watch it.

BECKEL: You just hit me again. Is this a Disney thing? Have you noticed that Disney kills everybody?

GUTFELD: No.

BECKEL: He does. He kills Bambi. He kills Old Yeller.

GUTFELD: Wait a second! There are a lot of people who are watching who haven't seen those!

BECKEL: Oh, they haven't? OK. And the fish.

GUTFELD: And the fish?

BECKEL: He got killed, too.

GUTFELD: What about this California school that is -- that teachers aren't allowed to display poinsettias or Santa Claus in their classroom because they don't want to offend anybody but you are allowed snowmen and snowflakes.

Andrea, isn't that kind of sexist, snowmen? Why not snow women?

TANTAROS: I don't think they want either one in the room.

I don't understand why this is such a big deal. I mean, Santa Claus is as secular as you can get. I mean, when people talk about Santa Claus, God forbid you actually talk about the birth of Christ. But now, they are trying to run Santa Claus out.

And the reason, Greg, if you look, the reason they do it is because they say there is a Sikh population. Well, I think, and I'm being serious, why not celebrate the Sikh's biggest holiday on May 1st? It's a great holiday. They have a parade here in New York. You can get all this free food and drink. And at the end, people love it.

BECKEL: There are parades in New York for every nationality here, which means there's a parade every day.

TANTAROS: So, what's wrong with that?

BECKEL: Nothing.

(CROSSTALK)

TANTAROS: But, let us have our Santa Claus.

BECKEL: But do you notice about poinsettias, they only last like a day and fall apart.

TANTAROS: You don't water them.

BECKEL: They do. They all like fall apart.

BOLLING: There are a few snow women in my neighborhood.

GUTFELD: Really?

BOLLING: Yes, every winter.

PERINO: I don't even think that poinsettia -- why is that even religious? Like I don't --

TANTAROS: It actually is religious.

PERINO: And also, it's in Stockton, California.

GUTFELD: Yes.

PERINO: So, I think the reason they want snowmen and the snowflakes is because they don't usually get snow. And so, it's like --

GUTFELD: That raises another point. Why do we consistently elevate snow over other type of weather? I mean, we're discriminating against rain and sleet and hail.

PERINO: Wind. Windy conditions --

GUTFELD: Wind. What has wind got?

BECKEL: I don't want to discriminate against you, but you are supposed to tease.

BECKEL: OK. Thank you, Bob.

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