Your Grrrs: June 28, 2005

Your Grrrs ...

Joey R. from Denver: Maybe R.W. Wahlert, Christine and some others should stop criticizing Tom Cruise for two seconds and think about how they would respond to some idiot spraying them in the face with water while they were at work. If someone walked into my office for an interview and squirted me in the face with a water pistol just to get a laugh, I would probably break their nose. I know it was a gag and it didn’t hurt Cruise, but you have to understand that the man was working and should be treated professionally. Even though I despise the way celebrities look down on us average folk, they are still people, and if you wouldn’t want to be soaked while you are working, then why should Cruise just laugh it off? WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE THINKING? Maybe if you weren’t so blinded by your contempt for the rich and famous you would be more understanding of the restraint Cruise showed to not react violently. You were dead on in your assessment of the situation Mike. Keep up the good work.

Katie from Alabama: Hello! I look forward to your column every week. Good to know that others face the same frustrations. I have a new word for you -- "Sweatiots." Sweatiots are those who leave behind their ooey gooey mess of stinky sweat on every cardio and weight-training machine at the gym. Do they ever wonder why other people walk around with towels? Grrrrr also to people (usually men) who leave ridiculous amounts of weight on the squat bars. Yes, I am so impressed that you can squat 500 pounds, now would you kindly remove those 45s so that I can get a workout?

John from cyberspace: As far as the "watering down" of the billion-dollar action star ... I think the sprayer of water was just trying to see Tom Cruise as he appears on EVERY COVER he's done in the last few years. I've noticed that any cover shot of Tom Cruise lately, be it ... Entertainment Weekly, People, GQ, Cosmo ... whatever ... he's soaking wet? Does he only photo well in water? Well if that's the case, I'd like to see him as he appears in magazines ... soaking wet with the poor "hey, what happened?" look on his face. Thank you, soaker dude.

Buzz from Plano, Texas: The part of the Cruise squirting incident that I find ridiculous is the fact that the perpetrators were being held by the cops on assault charges! You know that if I were squirted in the face by a toy microphone, the cops would laugh at me if I attempted to file charges. Another example of celebrity manipulating the legal system.

Brian in Rochester: My Grrr! goes out to all the idiots in the movie industry who can't figure out why people have stopped going to the movie theater recently. I love going to the movies as much as anybody. But let's put some facts into perspective for these Oblivions: Movie tickets for family of four: $30 popcorn; $8 drinks; $7 candy. Five dollars to sit on your own couch with a rental or DVD, with no distractions, with the family and a pizza: Priceless!

Bill M. in cyberspace: Tom Cruise was justifiably angered by what happened to him with the water incident. I would be too, if I were out conducting my business and some idiot shot me in the face with water for no reason other than to be "funny." HOWEVER, the media are really to blame here. Had they not turned this into an overblown issue, it would have passed more or less into the night without much else said on the subject. Cruise has decided not to press charges, which is the RIGHT thing to do. I mean, it was a lousy thing to do, but it was HARMLESS. I think Cruise realized this himself, and decided not to pursue it further. BTW: Bill Gates got a pie in the face not too long ago. The world's richest man and he laughed it off. Can't we all lighten up and let it go?

Rhonda in cyberspace: Sorry Mike, but I just can't agree with you on the Tom Cruise water pistol episode. True, it could have been something more serious than water, but it wasn't. Do you think if a naked woman ran up and threw herself at him, he would have flipped out? Well, using your reasoning, she might have been a suicide bomber (with a well-concealed bomb). How ridiculous! Look, when you are famous, you put yourself in the public eye. When you are in the public eye, you are subjected to just about anything -- that's the price of fame! I agree with Steve K. -- if Cruise had just laughed it off, he would have looked cool, but no. He still could have called the guy a jerk. He's just such a pompous a-- who hasn't done anything good in years. Now, he is going to try to ruin another young woman's life by leading her into Scientology and turning her into the person he wants her to be. Why do you think Nicole is gone ... she wouldn't fall for that.

Amy in cyberspace: It amazes me how jealous people are of fame and fortune that they think anyone who has it is automatically deserving of disrespect. When I was in college, my mother and I were walking back to my apartment from a scholarship awards ceremony, quite dressed up, when some idiot and his friend pulled up in a car and squirted us with water, then drove off. I suppose my success in winning a scholarship that day meant I deserved to be knocked down a few notches in my dry clean-only dress? The point is that there is no excuse for disrespect, and thank you for making that point so clearly, even if the Oblivions who read your column can't understand the concept.

Bree in Atlanta: Grrr! to the woman driving 30 mph in the farthest left lane on a 12-lane interstate with hazard lights flashing and a doughnut spare tire on her car the size of a CD. Traffic is bad enough in Atlanta during rush hour. We shouldn't have to put up with Oblivions driving ultra-slow in the fast lane. Thanks for forcing me to pass you on the right.

Matt in cyberspace: Tourist Grrs! Now granted, I realize that I myself was a tourist, but I've come across several Grrrs that I try to avoid doing when I am that tourist. Screaming, yelling at your friends to take a picture of you while numerous others are trying to enjoy the graceful beauty. Stopping in the middle of the walkway to gather all 15 people for a big group shot so that everyone has to walk around you and the person taking the picture. (My in-laws did this and I couldn't help but feel like an Obliviot at the time.) People who talk to your tour guide as he is telling a story only to spoil the anecdote he was so cleverly integrating into his story! And the people who don't heed the warnings about hiking down into the canyon and decide to go down with just one small bottle of water and tennis shoes! Grrr! My hat goes off the Rescue & Prevention Ranger that we meet in the canyon, his job is to rescue those fools!

Jennifer in cyberspace: My biggest Grrrs are to those who cannot, or will not. take responsibility for their own actions or decisions. For example, fingers are being pointed at Disney for the death of that little boy, even though there is no apparent cause of death. No outward sign of trauma and the initial autopsy didn't show any trauma either. So why the outcry of blame against Disney? They didn't make this poor mother take her child on this ride. People listen closely ... ready ... it was an ACCIDENT! Sometimes, there are no explanations for why things happen, they just do. Instead of pointing fingers at the one with the most money (money-hungry leeches y'all are) let's educate parents to have some common sense. Just because your kid is tall enough doesn't mean he/she should ride the biggest, baddest ride at the amusement park. Think before you DO. A motto everyone should adhere to.

Annette in cyberspace: I totally agree with your column today. There could have been anything in that microphone. I have seen women who have had liquid fire thrown on them and the results were horrible. What right did that man have to do such a stupid prank? If you don't like someone, stay away, don't see his movies and don't give anymore ammunition for more stardom. Where has the respect for human nature gone? I do think people in the limelight need to show more restraint, and maybe Cruise is acting a little silly, but how did you act in the beginning of your love life? Very, very excited.

Kenneth from cyberspace: I agree with you, Mike. It was in poor taste. I am no Cruise advocate, but I know what's funny and that was definitely not funny. I believe that Tom Cruise handled himself very professionally. Say that you are walking down the street and someone asks you for directions to somewhere. In the middle of helping the person out, he decides to squirt you in the face and starts laughing. I don't know about you, but it would be "Clobbering Time." As you have said, there is a time and a place for everything, and that was assuredly not it. Thanks for sticking up for Tom and putting funny in its place.

Angela in cyberspace: You mentioned in your column that pandering to the audience (etc.) is not creative or challenging. And yet, the creative and insightful remarks about your column that first drew me to it seem to have been replaced with constant rhetoric about the horribly uninteresting life of celebrities. To me, I can get as much insight and creativity from Access Hollywood or similar gossip forums. I guess I just fail to see how jumping on the media bandwagon is interesting, creative or in the least bit challenging. I much prefer you when you bring humor and insight to the lives of everyday people (like those who read your column). So, while I agree pandering to your audience would be no better than kissing butt, please remember the normal, everyday people that make up your audience. Anyone can poke fun and GRRR the celebrities. It’s far more entertaining to be original and go after unique (however annoying) Joe Oblivion. Heaven knows there are countless Joes everywhere worthy of your column.

David King in cyberspace: One point that seems to be overlooked by most people is that this stunt was done for a TV show. It was done for profit and ratings. There is no doubt that we have sadly entered an era where people can make a TV show without having any talent or creative ideas. It seems that television producers have either gotten too greedy or too lazy to make any attempt at quality TV. This stunt was no different than the paparazzi that rammed into Lindsey Lohan's car to get a picture. We are seeing crimes committed to create television and it is deplorable. Just my opinion.

Doug H. in cyberspace: Oh PLEASE!!! I got hit in the head with a beer mug at a bar ... a thick bottomed beer mug and the police couldn't have been bothered. Yet someone who is rich and famous gets water squirted in his face and they charge the guys with assault. Give me a break. Just goes to show you that if you are rich and famous, you get treated better than the rest of society. While I subscribe to the idea that because they are famous these things should be tolerated, I just want to point out how special they get treated and expect to be treated. All because he is pretty and can read a script.

Your Grrrs compiled by FOX News intern Michelle Siegel.

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Mike Straka is the director of operations and special projects for, and covers entertainment and features on the Sunday program "FOX Magazine." He also writes the weekly Grrr! Column and hosts "The Real Deal" video segments on