So, Nancy Pelosi's press conference Thursday was pure torture; for her anyway. She squirmed, bulged, and sweated — resembling a stress ball in a vice — with the press (for once) applying the pressure.

Well, except for one lapdog reporter in an obvious strategy to gain favor, asking the botoxed barracuda about health care. It's like during Hurricane Katrina, asking Bush if the pools would remain open.

Now I watched the conference at the gym, where they only allow CNN. There's no FOX News, mainly because it aggravates the yoga instructor's rosacea. From the stair climber, I watched Pelosi with the sound off and her body movements said more about what she knew than words ever could.

But really the stupid part came from CNN afterward, where some joker said the Republicans were using torture "politically," in an attempt to make national security an issue once again.

Well, we need to remember, no one in the Republican Party ever thought torture was a political issue. If anything, torture is precisely the opposite of a political issue — an act meant to save lives, not win an election. No one gains favor politically, especially in our media circles, for being a member of "the party that tortures." It was the Democrats from the start who smelled blood on this one, and are now paying for it.

And as for returning national security to relevance, it's about time. The fact that we need a stupid debate on torturing terrorists in order to remind everyone that terrorists need torturing is the scariest thing about this administration (and I'm including Joe's hair plugs).

So maybe we should be thanking Nancy pants, after all.

And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler.

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com