Signs You Treat Sex Like An Oil Change

Any good car owner knows that taking a vehicle in for regular maintenance is essential to keeping it running smoothly. Every 3,000 miles you diligently take your baby in for an oil change. Unfortunately, some guys are applying the same method to their sex lives.

Though you might treat your ride almost as well as you treat your girlfriend, a woman is not a car and regularly scheduled servicing is not going to be enough to keep her purring. Here are some hints that you may have started to think of sex with your girlfriend like a trip to the shop for an oil change.

For the record, this is a bad thing and means that you need to step up your game. What’s good for your car is not always what’s good for your sex life.

You have sex on a regular schedule

The first sign that you might be treating sex like an oil change is that you have a schedule for when you get busy. Whether it’s only on Fridays and Tuesdays or always right after the news, if you have it penciled in to your calendar, you’re really missing out on one of the best aspects of sex: spontaneity. Consistency is important for your car, but it will quickly start to bore your girl in the bedroom.

To break out of this rut, force yourself to be spontaneous. Grab her and start making out with her when she least expects it. If random groping in the kitchen while doing dishes together isn’t your style, you can try planning to initiate at a time other than when you’re used to doing it. Try morning sex for a change or spend an entire Sunday in bed.

The sex lasts as long as an oil change

Doing an oil change in 10 minutes is something to advertise, but if your sex sessions are lasting a similar amount of time, you have nothing to brag about. A quickie every once in a while can be fun, but sex should last longer than the time you have to wait for the mechanic to service your car.

To stretch it out a bit, make sure that you devote the first 10 minutes to foreplay. Don’t be a dipstick and jump straight to the penetration. This way you’ll be able to draw the sex out to an acceptable length of time.


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Her lubrication levels are low

When your car is running low on oil, you top it up — simple. Sure, you could add some lube if your girlfriend is not fully aroused, but you should be considerate and put in the effort to get her ready.

Be a good lover and make sure she’s properly lubricated by turning her on with kissing, caressing and groping before you get to the intercourse. Use your hands and mouth to make sure dryness is not a problem.

You follow a standard procedure

You know you’re treating sex like an oil change when you have the procedure down to a science — what kind of foreplay, which positions, how you orgasm, etc. It may be a tried-and-true method, but it’s also likely to get boring after a while.

Break out of your routine by trying out a new position. It will surprise your girlfriend and bring a new sense of excitement to your lovemaking. If that doesn’t work, there are a plethora of other ideas to shake up your sex life, many of which can be found here on AskMen. Get creative and make some changes.


Regular oil changes won’t do you any good if you don’t pay attention to the rest of your maintenance schedule. Just like you take your car in to get the tires rotated or the air filter changed, so should you tend to your girlfriend’s other needs. Being a good all-around boyfriend means harmony in your relationship and better times in the bedroom.

She’s not a Ferrari. She’s better.