An Illinois man made three mistakes earlier this month, according to the St. Clair County sheriff's office.

Mistake No. 1 was calling 911 about a robbery while drunk. Mistake No. 2 was telling deputies the purloined property happened to be several marijuana plants. Mistake No. 3 was not checking to make sure the plants were really gone in the first place.

Sheriff's Lt. Steve Johnson and Deputy Al Hake were dispatched to Anthony R. Martin's home outside Belleville on Sept. 2, reports the Belleville News-Democrat.

Martin, who admitted having had a few drinks, told the officers the dastardly woman who lived next door had stolen his pot plants, and then led the lawmen to where he said they used to be.

Sadly for him, the plants were, as Johnson put it, "still there, growing in the pots."

Martin, upset, said "he was sure his neighbor had taken his plants," according to Johnson. Martin then insisted someone must have put them back.

Having recovered the property, and the evidence, the officers promptly placed Martin, 52, under arrest for possession and cultivation of marijuana, as well as for two outstanding misdemeanor warrants.

He spent the night in the St. Clair County Jail (search) before posting bail the next day.

— Thanks to Out There reader Burney L.

The Job Title's Lousy, But the Benefits Are Great

NEW DELHI, India (AP) — New Delhi's government has a rat-catching department that hasn't caught a single rodent in more than a decade, a newspaper reported Monday.

There are 97 rat catchers on the municipal payroll, all working for the Rat Surveillance Department (search), a decades-old agency that last saw a lot of action back in 1994, when a plague outbreak killed 56 people in areas of northwest India near the capital, The Hindustan Times newspaper reported.

Each rat catcher earns about 3,500 rupees ($77) a month for catching, but there are no records of any rodents being caught in the past 10 years, the newspaper said.

Rats are not hard to find in New Delhi — they can be seen scurrying across public parks, streets and even in homes.

Many residents use their own traps to catch rats in the absence of any government effort to ensnare the rodents — which often carry diseases, including the plague.

New Delhi officials were not immediately available for comment, but the daily quoted officials as saying that whenever they receive complaints about rodents in other government departments, they set up traps to catch them.

However, the officials couldn't recall when or where they had last set up a trap, the newspaper said.

Family Values, Part I

WATERLOO, N.Y. (AP) — Nicholas Cerino could recognize one of "America's Most Wanted." The fugitive profiled on the show Saturday night was sitting in his living room.

His brother, Mark Cerino, 41, was identified on the show as a contractor wanted in Florida for allegedly scamming elderly residents after last year's hurricanes.

Nicholas Cerino said he was "just dumbfounded" to hear a warrant had been issued in Brevard County, Fla. (search), for his younger brother, who has been staying at his home in central New York.

Nine people called the show's tip line to report he was at his brother's home, and Mark Cerino was arrested within hours of the broadcast.

"America's Most Wanted" officials won't say whether Nicholas Cerino turned in his brother because the tipsters are anonymous, said Avery Mann, spokesman for the FOX TV show.

Mark Cerino was wanted on charges of contracting without a license during a state emergency. He was being held without bail at Seneca County Jail (search).

Nicholas Cerino said his brother had a 90-day contracting permit in Florida but couldn't get a license to work as a contractor when the permit expired. He said his brother repaid some customers and owes money to others.

He disputed allegations that his brother took money from unsuspecting victims and ran.

"This kid would give you the shirt off your back," Nicholas Cerino, a quadriplegic who owns a motorcycle shop in Waterloo, said in Monday's Post-Standard newspaper in Syracuse.

Family Values, Part II

MERCER, Pa. (AP) — Police cited an Ohio man for harassment after an ugly prank involving his sister.

Glenn Connolly, 35, of Youngstown, called state police in Mercer on Saturday and asked them to advise his sister, Victoria Christie, 34, of Mercer, that their mother had died, authorities said.

Troopers did just that, only to find out afterward that the woman hadn't died.

Police didn't immediately say what was behind the prank.

Connolly doesn't have a listed telephone and couldn't immediately be reached for comment Monday.

Because police filed only a summary citation, Connolly faces no more than a $300 fine and 90 days in jail if he's convicted.

Farmers Fined $9 Million for Beating Up Plants

CHARLOTTE, N.C. (AP) — A couple who faked weather damage to their crops by having workers throw ice cubes onto a tomato field and then beat the plants were ordered Thursday to repay more than $9 million they received fraudulently.

Robert Warren must also serve six years and four months in prison, while his wife, Viki Warren, was sentenced to 5½ years by U.S. District Court Judge Lacy Thornburg.

The pair, from Candler, must repay $9.15 million to the U.S. Department of Agriculture (search) for insurance payments and must forfeit $7.3 million in assets from their crimes, federal prosecutor Gretchen C.F. Shappert said.

The Warrens were charged with lying to insurers about planting and harvest dates and production from their R&V Warren Farms (search) in South Carolina and Tennessee beginning in 1997.

The data falsely indicated a history of high tomato production from their farms, Shappert said. The couple then photographed their fake crop damage to help document their insurance claims.

Prosecutors also said the Warrens claimed to have harvested 4,375 buckets of strawberries in 2000 from farms in Buncombe and Henderson counties. The strawberries were claimed to have been a total loss and the couple received more than $98,000 in indemnity payments.

In fact, the government said, the Warrens harvested more than 48,000 buckets of strawberries that year.

The Warrens purchased crop insurance from private companies that were ultimately reimbursed by the federal government through the Federal Crop Insurance Corp.

Robert Warren pleaded guilty last summer to conspiracy to defraud the FCIC and conspiracy to commit money laundering. His wife pleaded guilty to conspiracy to defraud the FCIC and mail fraud.

Compiled by FOXNews.com's Paul Wagenseil.

Got a good "Out There" story in your hometown? We'd like to know about it. Send an e-mail, with a Web link (we need to authenticate these things), to outthere@foxnews.com.