Kathy Griffin Is as Edgy as a Cotton Ball

It's time for a salute to the magical Kathy Griffin, truly an example of fearless fearlessness:


KATHY GRIFFIN, BRAVO: Remember when Republicans tried to get that nutbag Sarah Palin to sound credible before the vice presidential debate? The had a board and ran flash cards to teach her the tough stuff. Like there's both a North and South Korea. Well, that sort of like what John and Dana did for me.

GRIFFIN: Scott Brown.

JOHN KING, CNN: That's excellent.

GRIFFIN: Who is a senator from Massachusetts.


GRIFFIN: And has two daughters that are prostitutes.


GRIFFIN: And now a brief message from Bravo's legal team: Scott Brown's daughters are not prostitutes. We now return you to our regularly scheduled negativity.


I'm not sure what I love most about that clip: That Griffin, who will do just about anything for a buck, calls Scott Brown's daughters "prostitutes"; or the lame legal disclaimer that served only to show how cowardly her producers are; or the hysterical cackling of CNN's Dana Bash; or the uncomfortable awkwardness of her husband John King. Yep, even his great hair can't save him.

Anyway, Scott Brown's office issued a statement, saying: "Kathy Griffin and Bravo ought to be ashamed of themselves."

Yes, but the truly shameful thing about all this, is that anyone would find this joke shocking. And that's the hypocrisy behind Griffin's painful shtick. She prides herself on riding the "D List," because she's so daring. But when you look at everything she says, you realize she's about as edgy as a cotton ball.

In fact, every time she opens her pie-hole, she validates the assumptions of the people whose approval she desperately seeks. I mean, making fun of a Republican's kids? Needling Sarah Palin? Swearing on CNN?

Potpourri has more guts.

Calling Brown's daughters hookers begs returning fire with a few mean-spirited comments of my own. But why would calling her a Plasticine hand puppet make matters any better?

I mean, sure she's adopted the shellacked look of a botoxed, frill-necked lizard, but that just insults all the other shellacked frill-necked lizards out there. And what did they do to deserve that? Not a damn thing.

Boo, Kathy Griffin. Yay, shellacked frill-necked lizards!

And if you disagree with me, you probably shop at Walmart dressed as Hitler.

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com