Updated

Trial lawyers, whoop it up! Because even when you lose, you win.

Man, what a profession.

You've been smacked silly by Merck & Co. in trial after trial, state after state, year after year.

You've desperately tried to prove the company's Vioxx drug led to countless heart attacks and strokes. Yet jury after jury struck you down.

So, just when I thought you were down for the count, it's Merck that says "no mas!"

Incredible. Merck agreeing today to settle with the very folks they were clobbering for, get this, nearly $5 billion.

Jeez, imagine if Merck had been losing!

But I guess Merck just wanted it to go away.

The legal victories were great, but they were expensive. Try $600 million/year in legal costs each year.

So from the jaws of victory, Merck seizes defeat. And the trial lawyers a huge payday.

Assuming they take their usual one-third cut, expect them to rake in at least $1.5 billion.

Not bad, for losers. And not bad for other trial lawyers, no doubt salivating at the thought of going after Citigroup or Merrill or any of the latest legal victims du jour.

Remember, my friends, if bad business calls don't kill you, the lawyers will.

For companies that make drugs, and now companies whose bosses could use those drugs.

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