Unlike women, who are adept at the art of prevarication, most men say what they mean and mean what they say. Their speech is straightforward and to the point.
Women, on the other hand, are generally more complex and subtle, especially when it comes to conversation. That's why being able to interpret women's body language is vitally important.
Believe it or not, women are constantly giving out very obvious signals as to how they're feeling through their body language. The trick is to decode these signals, which is especially useful at the pickup stage when you don't know each other very well.
Check out the physical cues listed below to learn just what her eyes and hips are saying even if her lips are mute.
Women who are trying to get a man's attention are easy to point out, even from across the room; virtually every aspect of their body language changes drastically. For starters, they lean toward the man they are trying to attract and they frequently make eye contact. They laugh more often than usual and smile constantly, regardless of whether or not the guy is funny. They chew on their lips and their faces are more animated.
Flirtatious women also tend to fidget more. For example, they might fiddle with their jewelry, twisting rings and tugging at necklaces. This is due to nervous excitement; because their hearts are beating a little faster than usual, they need some sort of outlet for their tension.
They may also play with their hair or place their hands on themselves in some small but unusual way, which is an unconscious signal that they wish the object of their desire was touching them that way.
How you should react: If the woman in your sights is exhibiting most or all of the classic flirtatious signs listed above, you are right to feel confident about your chances and just sail in. Basically, her actions have just given you the green light.
Lust body signals are the same as flirtation signals, but they're ramped up a couple of notches. Just imagine Beyonce in any music video and you'll get the idea. Eye contact is increased and prolonged, and dilated pupils indicate arousal. Striking sassy poses — with hips and chest out — is a dead giveaway. Naturally, this overt behavior usually occurs in a private or sexually charged situation — like at a club.
Also, notice if she is breathing more heavily, which is indicative of desire. For example, does she breathe deeply when you're only inches away from each other at the theater, occasionally brushing each other? She may also try to touch you under any pretext.
How you should react: She's ready, so respond in kind. Ease yourself into more intimacy by reciprocating her actions, increasing eye contact and making excuses to touch her — at first casually, and then with more intensity if she doesn't pull away.
Physical signs revealing a lack of interest are pretty much the exact opposite of signs of flirtatiousness. For example, if your date keeps looking away while you speak to her and rarely smiles, she's probably not interested.
Other signs of disinterest may include leaning away from you or crossing her arms. Obviously, by crossing her arms in front of herself, she is strongly indicating that she is physically and mentally closed to your gestures.
How you should react: There's really little point in pursuing this cold fish. It wouldn't hurt to give a couple of tries at flirtation to see if she can be thawed. However, 9 times out of 10, she's just not feeling it, so don't bother putting too much effort into this one before throwing in the towel.
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If women are unsure of your intentions or their feelings toward you, they give off signs that they are feeling conflicted and indecisive. To match their inconsistent feelings, their bodies give off inconsistent signals — combinations of the flirtatious signals and the disinterested ones discussed above.
For example, they might stare at you, and then abruptly turn around and look away. Maybe they'll lean in toward you, but when you move in slightly to match their actions, they'll act as if they've suddenly changed their mind and shyly ease back in their seat. This means that they aren't yet sure what they think of you.
How you should react: In these situations, don't force the matter. Move slowly, being consistently friendly, but don't be too flirtatious or overtly sexual. Give her time to warm up to you.
Most people can recognize anger when they see it, but there are types of rage that are less obvious than a screaming fit. There is also the icy-cold burn, which is revealed through a narrowing of the eyes and a tightly closed mouth. This can be accompanied by a head tilt and tightly clenched or closed fists. She may also cross her arms as in the disinterested pose, but when she's angry, it's more pronounced. If her hands are placed on her hips, it's a very, very bad sign.
Unlike the types of body language listed above, this type of behavior usually occurs during the dating stage, not the pickup — you couldn't possibly have pissed her off already, right? However, you may get a taste of it in the early stages as well. At this point, realize that it's not about you; it's about someone or something else that has happened to her.
How you should react: An already miffed woman tends to be disinterested and unresponsive. She's not a prime candidate for the hookup if her thoughts are still on the traffic ticket she just picked up five minutes ago. Wait for time or other people to gradually defuse her rage, and then consider going in for the kill.
Interpreting Mixed Signals
Remember that women often give out mixed signals. For example, some women use sarcasm and put-downs to flirt with men even when they're interested in them. If a woman is insulting you with her words, but she's displaying all the physical signs of flirtation, she's probably into you.
Remember: Body language speaks louder than words. Watch her moves carefully and act accordingly.