It's another glorious Monday in the city that never sleeps! Who are they kidding? There are bums passed out all over the place. But the rest of us have to stay up all night and guard our stuff from looters. It's true.

According to the NYPD data, hundreds of suspects nabbed for looting and rioting after the George Floyd protests, have all had their charges erased. Yep, the charges were wiped out, like Kat after having one too many vodkas in first class.

The dismissal of charges must be great news to business owners, who can look forward to more repeat customers from their growing base of faithful looters! It's sort of like a "steal one, get one hundred free" sale. It's a lesson in incentives. Lack of punishment doesn't just remove a disincentive to crime, it becomes an incentive to do more of it. As if the flat screen you stole wasn't enough.

According to an NBC New York investigation: the Bronx - a borough ravaged by fires and mass looting - saw more than 60 percent of the charges dropped. And in Manhattan, where looters freely assaulted SoHo and midtown— over 200 of those arrested had their cases dropped.

But according to the media - pointing out the problem, makes you the problem. Take New York City mayor candidate Andrew Yang, who, in the last mayoral debate, tried to explain what every citizen in this shaken town understands. 

Andrew Yang, June 16: The fact is mentally ill homeless men are changing the character of our neighborhoods. A woman that my wife Ellen is friends with and her mom grew up within hell’s kitchen was punched in the face by a mentally ill man // this is happening in New York City and we are not talking enough about it.  Families are leaving as a result. // yes mentally ill people have rights. But you know who else have rights. We do. The people and families of the city.  We have the right to walk the street and not fear for our safety because a mentally ill person is going to lash out at us. 

He makes sense. He speaks soberly and rationally. The exact qualifications Democrats hate in a mayor. Consider New York Times columnist Michelle Goldberg, who upon hearing Yang, wrote this: "Every other candidate spoke of homelessness as a disaster for the homeless. Yang discussed it as a quality of life problem for everyone else." And because of that, she couldn't vote for Yang. 

So, is she stupid or deliberately misleading? Hard to tell. She's got a track record for both. But her assumption is that if you express concern about the legit safety concerns of the city you live in, you lack compassion for the homeless. It's as if normal folks can't hold two ideas in their heads - that we can't aid the homeless, and the citizens who deal with them on the street. Maybe it's just the writer who can’t hold two ideas in her head. 

And her stupidity prevents others from speaking out - knowing she'll label them fascists for wanting to protect their loved ones. I didn’t think weaponizing compassion was possible - But that’s how Michael Bolton got me to buy all those albums. But maybe Goldberg’s idiocy is designed to make her readers feel smarter. By the time I was done reading her column, I felt like I could have solved a Rubik’s cube with my toes. 

So, the next time you wonder why the street seems like a war zone, blame your lack of compassion for expecting better. This, as Joe Biden’s White House asks American citizens to report on friends and family who have potentially radicalized beliefs. Note: they didn't say report on someone who did something, but report on someone who believes something. And you know what that means -- a different political view will now be viewed as radical. Because that's how Democrats operate now. And what a better way to unify the country than having families snitching on each other?

Real crime is ok. Thoughtcrime will be severely punished. So while actual criminality is now a protected class the White House will direct funds and agents to an "internal threat" that has yet to present itself as a cohesive thing. Like, who are these massive well organized domestic terrorists? You mean the looters and the gangs? A lot of them sure don't look like white supremacists.

So why this new war on terror? Well, it's a distraction and an expansion of power. And this expansion involves targeting people whose views run counter to the White House. Intimidating opposition into silence. And driving them underground. That can’t be good. I guess allowing left-wing mobs to attack you isn’t the only way to shut you up.

Meanwhile, violent crime is the silliest of concerns - says the media. It's just porn for Midwesterners, says pop n fresh.

Brian Stelter, June 20: "It’s almost pornographic if you’re living in the middle of the country reading about San Francisco all the time. By the way, there’s problems in cities. There’s problems everywhere. If you read about them constantly, you’re going to blow them out of proportion."

Why is it the legacy media only cares about blowing the crime out of proportion rather than the crime itself? In journalism, all sides deserve to be heard. That’s why he covers the explosion of crime from the perspective of "what’s the big deal?" 

Right Brian, if you’re in Kansas who cares if a brat gets shot in Times Square? This is the mentality that led to the phrase "peaceful protest." Sure Minneapolis was on fire but somewhere a cornfield was just fine. Bottom line: you can’t cover the news if it makes far-left policies look bad. 

Stelter is arguing for less coverage of a widespread explosion in crime. Isn't that weird coming from a journalist? To be any less concerned about crime you’d have to be holding a sign that says "defund the police."


So: hearing about people being beaten, robbed, and murdered is almost like pornography. I guess where CNN anchors live, they’re more cut off than Don Lemon on New Year’s Eve. It’s where crime is "porn" - and watched from behind the locked front gate, protecting your highly secure home.

I got news for Stelter -- if you consider an Asian elderly woman being beaten by a repeated offender in broad daylight to be pornographic - Twinkies aren't your only problem. Maybe I’d see a sex therapist. And not the one Toobin is using, either.

This article is adapted from Greg Gutfeld's opening monologue on the June 20, 2021 edition of "Gutfeld!"