Lindsay Lohan Goes Boating Topless, 'Fashion Police' Returns to TV, and Much, Much More

Here's what people are talking about:

• Lindsay Lohan posted a topless photo of herself on Monday afternoon (above), most likely taken during a yacht trip off the coast of St. Tropez. Because if the paparazzi isn't going to do it, somebody's got to.

• Did you know that September is National Self Improvement Month? Well it is, and there's no better way to celebrate than by achieving your fitness goals, like strengthening your abs and obliques. Unless you're already perfect as-is. In that case, just skip ahead to the next entry. But If not, watch the video below to see how Ali Gritz of Crunch Fitness keeps her tummy tight.

<p>• After going on hiatus earlier this year, the E! series <a href="" target="_blank">&quot;Fashion Police&quot; returned on Monday night</a> with Melissa Rivers as host. Hopefully, the re-emergence of a fashion police force will finally put an end to the harsh period of fashion lawlessness and skyrocketing fashion-crime rates that have plagued this country since March.</p> <p></p> <p>• Columbia Pictures debuted the first trailer for <a href="" target="_blank">&quot;Concussion,&quot;</a> in which Will Smith portrays the real-life doctor who discovered a link between degenerative brain disease and playing professional football (below). And although he hasn't said so, we imagine Smith was attracted to the role after observing the brain trauma suffered by his pal Jazzy Jeff, who was <a href="" target="_blank">repeatedly and violently thrown from a Bel-Air mansion.</a> </p> <p>• The recently released film &quot;We Are Your Friends,&quot; starring Zac Efron as a struggling club DJ, reportedly suffered <a href="" target="_blank">the third-worst opening weekend of all time,</a> taking in just $1. 8 million from 2,333 theaters. This equates to about $257 per day per theater, or just slightly less than Zac Efron might earn if he were an <em>actual</em> struggling club DJ. </p> <p></p> <p>• Hermit-like reality star Rob Kardashian shared <a href="" target="_blank">his first selfie in a really long time</a> on Monday, looking perfectly healthy and well-adjusted despite rumors of weight problems and reclusive tendencies (below). In all fairness, though, it's hard to tell from Rob's photo if he's hiding a Howard Hughes-like amount of empty tissue boxes or overgrown fingernails, just out of frame.</p> <blockquote> <div style="padding:8px;"> <div style=" background:#F8F8F8; line-height:0; margin-top:40px; padding:50.0% 0; text-align:center; width:100%;"> <div style=" background:url(data:image/png;base64,iVBORw0KGgoAAAANSUhEUgAAACwAAAAsCAMAAAApWqozAAAAGFBMVEUiIiI9PT0eHh4gIB4hIBkcHBwcHBwcHBydr+JQAAAACHRSTlMABA4YHyQsM5jtaMwAAADfSURBVDjL7ZVBEgMhCAQBAf//42xcNbpAqakcM0ftUmFAAIBE81IqBJdS3lS6zs3bIpB9WED3YYXFPmHRfT8sgyrCP1x8uEUxLMzNWElFOYCV6mHWWwMzdPEKHlhLw7NWJqkHc4uIZphavDzA2JPzUDsBZziNae2S6owH8xPmX8G7zzgKEOPUoYHvGz1TBCxMkd3kwNVbU0gKHkx+iZILf77IofhrY1nYFnB/lQPb79drWOyJVa/DAvg9B/rLB4cC+Nqgdz/TvBbBnr6GBReqn/nRmDgaQEej7WhonozjF+Y2I/fZou/qAAAAAElFTkSuQmCC); display:block; height:44px; margin:0 auto -44px; position:relative; top:-22px; width:44px;"> </div> </div> <p style=" color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;"><a href="" target="_blank">A photo posted by ROBERT KARDASHIAN (@robkardashian)</a> on</p> Aug 30, 2015 at 10:46pm PDT</div> </blockquote> <p>• A musical based on Nickelodeon's long-running cartoon series &quot;SpongeBob SquarePants&quot; has been <a href="" target="_blank">confirmed for Broadway,</a> set to debut sometime during the 2016–2017 season after first premiering in Chicago next June. So at long last, audiences will soon learn whether Squidward is as sexy in-person as he is on-screen.</p> <p></p> <p>• Professional dancer Peta Murgatroyd of &quot;Dancing With the Stars&quot; announced she will <a href="" target="_blank">not be able to compete next season</a> due to an ankle injury that requires immediate surgery. ABC has yet to announce whether they've lined up a replacement for Murgatroyd, and/or if this replacement will have an equally made-up-sounding name.</p> <p>• FX has released <a href="" target="_blank">three new teasers</a> for their forthcoming season of &quot;American Horror Story: Hotel.&quot; Each seems designed to capitalize on our existing fear of hotels, and especially the very rational fear that our hotel mattresses are actually stuffed with not-quite-dead prostitutes (below). That's a thing, right? </p> <p>• And finally, after announcing the project back in March, NBC has decided to <a href="" target="_blank">cancel its planned revival of the '90s sitcom &quot;Coach.&quot;</a> So to everyone who binge-watched all nine seasons of &quot;Coach&quot; just to re-familiarize yourself with the series, our sympathies are with you. You've wasted your time.</p>