It's been a rough but rewarding year for Gwen Stefani.
In a recent interview with Harper's Bazaar, the No Doubt frontwoman again opens up about her heartbreaking divorce from Gavin Rossdale after 14 years of marriage, her new relationship with Blake Shelton, and all the music that's coming out of her personal trials and celebrations.
Stefani says Feb. 9, 2015, was when her marriage started to fall apart with Rossdale, who allegedly had an affair with their children's nanny. The two announced their divorce in August. "It was the beginning of hell," she recalls. "Like six, seven, eight months of torture, trying to figure out this big secret."
"My dreams were shattered," Stefani continues. "All I wanted my whole life was to have babies, be married, like what my parents have. Then I remember thinking,'There's gotta be a reason for this.' Of course you go through the 'Why me?' and feel sorry for yourself."
The 46-year-old singer says it was both shocking and a comfort to learn that her fellow mentor on "The Voice," Blake Shelton, was also getting divorced from his wife at the time, Miranda Lambert. "There I was with my big secret, right? And that's when Blake was like,'Everybody, before we go out there, I want to let everyone know that by the time this airs, I will be divorced,'" Stefani shares. She says the news also left her feeling "exposed somehow."
"But it was like being handed this gift of a friend who was going through the exact same thing at the exact same time," she adds.
"And then it was just like everything flipped," Stefani, who started dating Shelton officially in November, reveals. "It went from horrible to, like, hopeful and, like, 'Wow, God, you just don't know what's gonna happen next.'"
The singer's music has only benefited from the ups and downs in her personal life. "I'm at a certain time in my life where I feel like I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. Every day is art, you know? Some days are really bad, and some days are so good," she confides. As for her relationship with the 40-year-old country crooner, "It's crazy the support and love I've felt."
The couple are topping the country music charts with their duet "Go Ahead and Break My Heart,"and when ET caught up with Shelton in May, he couldn't help but gush over his girlfriend. "I just like being with her, but when she's all dolled up and we go places, it's always fun for me," he bragged. "If she was here right now, not one person here would be looking at anybody else but her. It's just cool to know that's who I came here with."