More than four months after the Colorado theater shooting trial, some of the jurors who served are still traumatized.

They say they suffer nightmares, anxiety and feelings of shame for the flashbacks they suffer despite never having set foot inside the theater in July 2012, when 12 people were killed and scores of others were injured.

Four jurors spoke to The Associated Press on condition of anonymity to talk extensively about their struggles in the aftermath of the grueling trial of James Holmes. The jurors could not unanimously agree Holmes deserved to die, so a judge sentenced him to life in prison.

To cope, they've formed an unusual bond, sending uplifting text messages and sharing dinners. They're also raising money for a memorial for the victims they saw every day in court.