Why Did Comedian/Commentator Dennis Miller Abandon his Liberal Beliefs?

This is a rush transcript from "The O'Reilly Factor," August 22, 2007. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated

BILL O’REILLY, HOST: In the "Miller Time" segment tonight, Dennis continues his vacation overseas. Can't wait to hear about that. So we decided to reprise a bunch of his greatest hits on "The Factor."

You'll want to record this. Roll it.


O'REILLY: I want to remind people that you used to be a raving left- wing loon. And you converted, like Saint Paul? And now you're a libertarian, not a conservative. How did that conversion come about?

DENNIS MILLER, FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR: Well, listen. I must say that I never considered myself a secular progressive. I know you're familiar with that mindset. Sec-prog is what I call them.

I didn't consider myself that then, and I don't consider myself to be Curtis LeMay now. I have always thought of myself as a pragmatist. And I began to see a degree of certitude on the left that I found unsettling. I don't like lockstep, even if it's lockstep about being open-minded.

And after 9/11, I remember thinking we might have to get into some preemptive measures here. And that seemed to put me — I don't know — off to the kids' table.

O'REILLY: Did you lose friends in the entertainment industry? Did people turn their back on you?

MILLER: I think there's a lot of double cheek air kissing in Hollywood. I might have lost some of those friends, but no, not my dear friends. I certainly hope our friendship runs deeper than that. I still have some ultra-liberal friends. I went to Arnold's for a Christmas party.

O'REILLY: Arnold Schwarzenegger. He's not ultra liberal. Now, did you lose any work?

MILLER: You never know about that, Bill. You know, that all seems — listen, I've always made my living speaking my mind. I have to keep speaking my mind.

O'REILLY: You have this rogue prosecutor. He's off the case now. What do you think should happen to this guy?

MILLER: Well, listen, I think obviously he should be disbarred. I think he should be sent to jail. And I think if there's any karma in the universe, as part of a work release program, he should be sent out into the community to do stripteases at sorority parties.

I mean, the guy is obviously a local doofus wearing Haggar slacks up to his belly button. He always thought his life was going to pan out; he'd be a John Grisham character. It didn't happen that way. He wanted to get it into the pension barn.

He had this Tom Wolfe scenario dropped into his lap. Like every guy down there with a Christ complex, he wanted to be Atticus Finch. Except, in this case, there was only one mockingbird that was killed, and it was those three kids.

O'REILLY: Global warming.


O'REILLY: Is it getting hot out there or what?

MILLER: Well, listen, I was starting to believe in it until the U.N. said they believe in it. Now I'm pretty sure I don't believe in it, because I just don't trust the U.N.

But the fact is, Bill, that I think that it is getting warmer. My next car I'll probably buy a hybrid for my son, just to hedge my bets.

But the fact is, I don't know how much impact mankind has on it. You know, to think that we can make the universe hotter or our atmosphere hotter. We can't thin traffic after Dodger games, for God's sake.

O'REILLY: You have two boys who are teenagers. Do they, No. 1, care about Paris Hilton going to jail at all?

MILLER: If there's anything to be learned from the Paris situation or as I'm calling it, "The Shaw-skank Redemption." Let's say that I think this is a godsend for parents.

I mean, very infrequently do you get the whole package in one person. We've got venal, vacuous, venomous. I think that there's around five life lessons you can learn from Paris Hilton.

I've got 13- and 16-year-old boys. I'm sure they're probably hot for her on one level, but whenever she's on the air I point out to them that this is not how you want to be as a human being. To me, she's a one-stop shopping thing for life lessons.

And I said to my kid, "They're going to send her to jail for 45 days. What do you think?"

He said, "It could be worse. They could sentence her to 45 days in a Hilton."

O'REILLY: Michael Moore got very angry at CNN for telling the folks that his documentary is not quite on the level. Now, is this a stunner for anyone? He wants us all to buy into the Cuban health care system. I've got my beret, how about you? You ready to go with the Cuban health system?

MILLER: Well, listen, all I'll tell you is if you go to a nationalized health care system and this guy is going to have enough fodder for another documentary that will be twice as long and twice as ostensibly heartbreaking as the one he just made. I mean, I don't think that's anything we have to aspire to.

I'm just surprised that Michael Moore, for somebody who's so zaftig, is also so thin-skinned. The guy evidently has an "I've imbibed too many Napoleons" complex. Because he went off on Wolf Blitzer.


MILLER: Who I find — you know, I find Wolf Blitzer to be sort of, you know, the ultimate softball thrower. I haven't seen that many softballs pitched since Eddie Feigner went around the Midwest with his touring team.

O'REILLY: Ward Churchill, go.

MILLER: I am very happy that the tenured Tonto has been sent on his way. And all I can say to the University of Colorado is, can you guys get a dental plan out there for your professors, for God's sakes?

Now, he's going to say that it has simply to do with the fact that he referred to the 9/11 people as little Eichmanns. But the fact is, this is about plagiarism. This guy's Indian name is Dances with Facts. And it was about time that he went. He's a weak guy.

And the fact that Churchill is his last name. So we've got the guy with the least spine and the man with the most spine in the history of the planet earth both have the last name Churchill.

O'REILLY: I'm always disappointed when people come on with propaganda, like Senator Dodd did, you know. Obviously, he didn't know what I said about Al Qaeda in San Francisco, didn't know what program I said it on. It was fed to him.

MILLER: Well, let me tell you, Bill. You're disappointed in him as a fan of "The Factor." When I'm not on I don't miss a night. I'm a little disappointed that you would give a hack like that a toehold.

You know, these people aren't going to come on and debate on FOX, which is the preeminent cable news organization in this country, if I'm to believe your ratings that I read on the Internet probably eight times what the Daily Kos gets on any given day. For you to let him come in and sandbag you like that, I must tell you, as a viewer of "The Factor," I don't need to hear from hacks like him.

O'REILLY: Oh, come on. That's interesting, but you would not have even used him?

MILLER: He not only has never watched "The Factor," he's never read the Daily Kos. He's a guy who's looking up in the Iditarod of the Democratic primary process at Dennis Kucinich's behind in front of him.

He could speak at his dining room table and only 50 percent of the family would show up. And I don't need him on here unless he wants to talk about something substantive, which he didn't.


O'REILLY: So what does Miller really think?

I'm looking forward to the new season with Dennis.

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