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Tell me if this has ever happened to you:

You call a contractor with a problem.

He promises he'll be right out, but he leaves himself a pretty wide window: Between 12 and 5 p.m. on Saturday.

So between 12 and 5 p.m. that Saturday, you don't move. You don't budge.

At 12 o'clock, nothing.

At 1 o'clock, still nothing.

At 2 o'clock, same thing.

At 3 o'clock, the doorbell rings. But it's just your kids messing with 'ya.

By 5 o'clock, shock of shocks, the guy never shows up.

So you call, get an answering machine.

He calls you days later. He regrets the problem, something came up.

You're saying to yourself, "Yeah, like maybe, I hope, you died!?"

He never tells you the problem. It's his problem, after all. He can't be bothered with yours.

He reschedules, this time 9-12 p.m. next Saturday.

You say, "Go to hell."

You look in the phone book, for another contractor, another utility person, another cable guy. Different guys. Same story. If I've seen it once, I've seen it a thousand times.

You want to improve service in this country? I say, stick to appointments in this country!

I think there are a lot of media and phone companies these days scrambling to find out what's ailing them. I can tell them in two words: customer service.

Two more words: It stinks.

When you start treating customers like cattle, customers wander. You give us the bum steer, we'll tell you where you can stick that steer.

But first make an appointment for me. How about next Saturday, between 12 and 5 p.m?

Good for you? Great, I'll pencil you in.

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