This is a rush transcript from "The Five" January 7, 2021. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

JESSE WATTERS, FOX NEWS HOST: Hello, everybody. I'm Jesse Watters along with Greg Gutfeld, Dagen McDowell, Geraldo Rivera, and Martha MacCallum. It's five o'clock in New York City, and this is THE FIVE.

President Biden proving once again that he has got no clue when it comes to the pandemic. Some of his top former medical advisors are trying to get his attention, saying the president's COVID strategy needs a major overhaul. And want Biden to tell Americans they need to learn to live with it. Good luck with that.

The commander in chief contradicting himself in the same sentence, while talking about his COVID plan and what Americans can expect.


UNKNOWN: Mr. President, can Americans prepare to live with COVID forever?


UNKNOWN: -- said 7.1 percent.

UNKNOWN: Mr. President, should Americans prepare --


UNKNOWN: If COVID is here to stay, sir, can Americans be prepared that COVID is here to stay?

JOE BIDEN, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA: No, I don't think COVID is here to stay. But having COVID in the environment here and in the world, it's probably here to stay, but COVID as we are dealing with it now is not here to stay. The new normal doesn't have to be -- we have so many more tools. And so, we are going to be able to control this. No new normal is not going to be what it is now. It's going to be better.


WATTERS (on camera): And if you thought Jimmy Carter was bad, Kamala Harris is trying to one up him. The V.P. not inspiring any confidence with these comments about dealing with the virus.


KAMALA HARRIS, VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA: And I understand, and I fully appreciate -- there is a level of malaise. We're in two years into this thing. You know, people are -- we want to get back to normal, we all do. But we have to then do the tough and hard work of pushing through with solutions, understanding that there are going to be challenges.


WATTERS (on camera): And Biden's sweeping vax mandates could be on the ropes. The Supreme Court hearing challenges to the mandates today, and signaling they could strike them down.

All right. Let's just mention Greg brought -- what are we calling this thing? America's fish?

GREG GUTFELD, FOX NEWS CO-HOST: That's America's fish.

WATTERS: America's fish.

GUTFELD: It's Abe Vigoda. Can we get a close-up of him? I call, you know, Outnumbered has one lucky guy. This is one lucky gill. And you know who he is just dying to school Geraldo, just hoping he doesn't get hooked on the spotlight.

But you know, I figured since I'm alone in the studio, I needed somebody to keep me company. Who better than my little friend Abe? These are adorable. Look at those eyes. Sexy little fish. Anyway.

WATTERS: Watch yourself, we could have an H.R. complaint. All right, Greg, take it away.

GUTFELD: Well, you know, what, we're in desperate for leadership. And something that's called wisdom and there's nothing that Joe has -- Joe Biden has said that provides any of that. Which is weird because that's the benefit of age, is wisdom. But instead, we're getting the consequences of age, which is a disjointed, convoluted, aimless asides about things.

And I go back to that original thing that I said a long time ago. It's the people who are going to lead us out of this, not the leaders. And you can - - you talk to anybody. Because of this bad messaging and the exhaustion, and people with the boosters and the double boosters getting COVID, people have -- it's almost miraculous. People are actually in unison having enough. They have had enough. They are looking at February 1st. They know that's when this is going to be over. It's almost like we are leading the country, not the leaders.

The problem with Kamala Harris, though, she is the 9/11 of Pearl Harbor's. Right? She is on what scientists call poop island. It's a place that once you get on it, you can't get off.

And everyone who is supposed to help you doesn't want to because they don't want any poop on them. So basically, they are just letting her suffer. And it's unfair to Jimmy Carter because he never said malaise. It was a -- the speech was a crisis in confidence, but he never said malaise but it's called the malaise speech.

But you get the sense that the Dems have given up on Kamala and Joe. It's like a dead marriage that it's kept alike until the kids are out of the house. And in this case, if the kids are out of the house is when the election comes up.

WATTERS: So, Geraldo, Greg mentioned with age comes with wisdom, so we'll go to you. But Kamala Harris --

GERALDO RIVERA, FOX NEWS CORRESPONDENT-AT-LARGE: Yes. I resemble -- I resemble those remarks.

WATTERS: Yes. Kamala Harris should know better, not because she is old or because she was around in the '70s. Because she is a politician. You know you don't say the word malaise. It just -- it triggers the Carter era, it makes people remember the era.


WATTERS: It's not a great era. Why did she say that?

RIVERA: true.

WATTERS: And why -- how could she say that?

RIVERA: I think in terms of communication, she really is clueless. And I say that with all due respect. And I really always remind myself and everyone else that what a historic figure she is, but welcome back Carter. You know, to use that word, it invokes the era. You know, Biden's COVID is Carter's hostage crisis.

And this feeling America has simultaneous case of the blast. Now it may be just the fact that, you know, I got sick a couple of weeks ago, and that tinted or tinged my optimism that I usually have. I'm kind of buoyant person naturally.

But I really, it's kind of snowing in Cleveland, you are dragging your tail through like, wondering when this thing is finally going to end. You are going to go to the airport when you want to, you know, give someone a high five when you want to. It's a lot. It's a lot. The news is pretty mediocre, generally speaking, Jesse.

WATTERS: You know, Dagen, it was a great analogy by Geraldo, that COVID is Joe Biden's hostage crisis. Would you like to add anything to that? I think it sums it up perfectly.

DAGEN MCDOWELL, FOX NEWS BUSINESS CORRESPONDENT: No, I would like to -- well, I kind of have given up hope after I was listening or read and reading what the liberal Supreme Court justices said.


MCDOWELL: And the misinformation that they were hacking up -- how could you make good sound policies and decisions when you are using the wrong, incorrect information? You cannot.

Justice Sotomayor said 100,000 children are in serious condition, many on ventilators. Wrong. There are fewer children who have been hospitalized with COVID in the last year and a half. It's about 84,000.

Another doozy. Omicron is as deadly as Delta. No, it's not, not even for the unvaccinated it's not! I've called doctors about this. They said that is patently false. Marty Makary, the doctor told me there are actually no confirmed deaths from Omicron, not even the original one in Houston.

Justice Breyer, so you have a Supreme Court justice, Justice Breyer went on to say, implied Omicron case numbers would start falling if the Biden vaccine mandate was in place. Well, that's balderdash. And then Elena Kagan was talk -- essentially talking about this policy, the vaccine mandate, we need it -- we need this to stop the virus. We need to stop the spread with this vaccine mandate. Vaccinated people are catching it.

Look at Geraldo and me and all of us, and spreading it. So, I just want to point out, you have a Supreme Court justice, particularly Sotomayor, that was the most egregious today, on the most important issue facing this nation and she has her facts not just wrong, but stunningly pick up my jaw off the floor-wrong.

So, it's like she is getting her facts from the CNN or even The View. Joy Behar would have done a better job on the high court today.

WATTERS: Justice Behar. That is a shocking image. Martha, how stunning is it that you have Supreme Court justices, the president, the vice president, the CDC, not able to speak with any sort of precision about a virus that, you think by this point we'd know a little something about?

MARTHA MACCALLUM, FOX NEWS ANCHOR: Yes. I think that Americans as a nation, we just have a certain level of expectation for how smart we are going to be about things, and how well we're going to handle stuff, we expect that.

I looked up the numbers today, how much we spend on HHS and combined with the NIAID, the National Allergy and Infection and Disease, and NIH. Right? So, you've got about two trillion and then another $50 billion. Right? And then you have this letter that comes from the six very esteemed doctors.

And one of the suggestions that they have is that the United States should have a modern data infrastructure to survey the virus. Hello? I mean, wouldn't you have a natural expectation in the technologically advanced United States of America that we wouldn't have to call on Israel and the U.K. to figure out the data for how long the immune system is able to fight off these different viruses after the vaccines?

Why? How could we possibly be spending over $2 trillion, and employing thousands of people at these health agencies? What are they doing if they are not figuring out a modern data infrastructure to know more about the virus and feel smart about it?

Instead, you have this sort of, I compare it to the Peanuts teacher. Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, right? Coming from the top levels of government talking about challenges that we'll face and tough things that will come and how will work through the problems.

And you just say no, I want actual results. I want as an American citizen to say, well, I know that there are monoclonal antibodies out there and I know that there are achievements out there. So, I would certainly expect that if someone would need them, they would be able to get your hands on them in the United States of America.

So, these are really specific things that I think Americans just have an expectation that we are going to handle well, and we haven't. So, it doesn't matter how many times you're told like, gee. we get it. You know, there's a little bit of malaise and wah, wah, wah. We want more than that and should have more than that for the money that we spend.

WATTERS: Abe Vigoda, America's fish, we do a better job of running this government.


MCDOWELL: Hey, can I say something about Abe Vigoda?

GUTFELD: Yes, please.

MACCALLUM: I love that name.

MCDOWELL: All right. So, I actually know why Greg named it Abe Vigoda. And I took a poll nobody else knows so I was kind of proud of myself.

MACCALLUM: I know why.

MCDOWELL: But I rode -- I rode down the elevator with Abe Vigoda.


MCDOWELL: Abe Vigoda smells.

WATTERS: Smells?

GUTFELD: But did he say, was he polite to you? He didn't say anything to you in the elevator like Geraldo does.


MCDOWELL: I don't know. He was trying -- he was trying to look at my skirt. I'm just kidding. I have pants on.

MACCALLUM: I think it's just because he has big eyes.

WATTERS: Abe, we're going to have to put him into sensitivity training. All right. That's next week. Up next, though, schools shutting down. But America's education crisis is about to get much worse. We'll explain.


RIVERA (on camera): Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. Snow like crazy in Cleveland today. Always stretched to the limit, America's education system now in crisis as the latest COVID outbreak and renegade teachers unions wreak havoc.

Schools struggling to stay open, some going remote. It's a stress mess. That there's teachers and students are on the brink. In fact, the new survey finds over the last month, 48 percent of teachers admitting that they have considered quitting the profession.

That comes as the standoff in Chicago enters its third straight day, lives hanging in the balance for more than 300,000 public school students out of class, some hungry, some unsupervised, and yet the militant teachers union finding some support from the ladies of The View.


UNKNOWN: The notion that, you know, teachers should just suck it up and go to work. I just, I think it's ridiculous.

UNKNOWN: They are understaffed. It's unsafe. They're undertested, there is no tests at home. This is a petri dish that they are being told to walk into every day.

ANA NAVARRO, CO-HOST, ABC: If you want to make this less political, they should be the school superintendent taking the lead on this, not the politically elected mayor of Chicago.


RIVERA (on camera): All right. There is a guy named Jesse Sharkey who is a socialist, who runs the teachers union. So, isn't Chicago unique in the fact that it has this militant teachers union that really goes way overboard, it seems, in terms of what's reasonable and what's not?

WATTERS: Yes. Militant is a good word to describe it, Geraldo. This would be my plan to save Chicago. I'll call Oprah. I'd say, Ms. Winfrey, this is your city, go put out a PSA. Let's get some fire lit under these teachers. And that would do a lot of good. She's got juice. You know that.

Then you call Michelle Obama. Can you do something, Michelle? Make a call. Michelle made a call --


RIVERA: Good idea. Good idea.

WATTERS: -- when Jussie Smollett got booked. She's not going to make a call when 350,000 school-aged students are being denied an education? I mean, the Chicago schools got everything they wanted. They got nearly $3 billion. All the teachers got to jump the line with the vaccine. And now they're not even agreeing to a deal they've made with other Democrats.

Democrats and Democrats can't do a deal? It's no wonder Republicans don't want to deal with these people. They won't even give their own party a fair shake. Imagine being a Chicago parent. Like you worked in a butcher shop, you take a subway, you go into an office building. You have adults breathing on you all day. They are still going to work.

But teachers can't go to work in one of the safest environments there is, a classroom. So, I would do this. I would threaten the Chicago teachers with a test, not a COVID test, an actual test to see if they can actually teach, to see if they are qualified enough to teach the students.

Because basic reading, writing, and arithmetic I'd even throw in some questions about COVID just to see if they are knowledgeable at all about this virus. And if they can't get what, over 80 percent your doctor pay, you had a great idea, Geraldo. If they get over 80 percent, you negotiate in good faith. But I don't think these teachers are even smart enough to be in the classroom.

RIVERA: Dagen, Jesse mentions tests. You know, one of the proposals by the teachers union is that kids get tested, every kid gets tested before they open the school, and the kids can get tested, in the opinion of the union without the consent of the parent. How do you feel about that?

MCDOWELL: They are vaccinated, they are basically refusing these teachers to go to work for what is a bad cold, where they want to stay home and go to bars and drink. Get to work.

I wish Lori Lightfoot would stand up and fire them all. Seventy-three percent of these teachers voted to return to remote learning. If she fired them all and pulled a Ronald Reagan, wouldn't that be something? I guarantee you more than 27 percent of them would show up in the classroom.

Those women on The View, leave it to selfish narcissists to defend selfish narcissists. These are -- these teachers are willing to hurt children to protect themselves. And I'll just will point to all of the people who sacrificed and did put their health at risk way before a vaccine to just put food on people's tables, not just the health care workers but the Amazon delivery people, anybody delivering groceries and packages, putting it out there, even drive an Ubers putting it out there every day.

These teachers, what half of them have thought about quitting? Good. We need to blow up the whole system. Quit. Go find a job that when you don't show up for work, they will fire your ass.

RIVERA: Greg, it is like the squad is running the union, isn't it?

GUTFELD: Yes. And you have The View defending these teachers. Because if the teachers go back to work, there goes The View's audience. Right? These teachers are The View's key demographic, you know, sluggish cat ladies in sweat stained with chocolate layers. That's an image I (Inaudible). But you know what, that is kind of unfair.


RIVERA: It is unfair.

GUTFELD: But it illustrates --

RIVERA: It is unfair. Ana Navarro for one is very, very bright.

GUTFELD: All right. Let me get to my point, Geraldo. This --


GUTFELD: I'm making this point for a reason. Kat Timpf made this point last night. Teachers unions have managed to take one of the most beloved occupations and redefine it as selfish and lazy. Everyone -- all of us, in our generations used to love our teachers. My mother was a teacher. I bet some of your mothers were teachers.

WATTERS: Mine too.

GUTFELD: Yes. And the system --

MCDOWELL: Mine too.

GUTFELD: -- and the union destroy the image of the teacher, turned the classroom into a supervised prison. So now this is one crisis where that America shouldn't let go to waste. We should fire people. It's time to pull the money out of the system, start backing the parents, give them the money so they can make the choices for the best education, whether it's school choice, home-schooling, the Palatine model.

That's the only way you are going to make this better, is by introducing competition. But the unions hate competition. Because that means they got to take off the jammies, put on the clothes and go to work. Right?

RIVERA: But what about the point, Martha, what about the point, the point that they want the kids all to be tested, and there are no tests available? I mean, don't they have a point there, Martha?

MACCALLUM: It's ridiculous. I mean, they got billions of dollars to make sure that the schools were safe. They have been told they have to go to work and I agree. What other profession are you told you have to show up for your job, and if you don't show up, you don't get fired? I mean, it's ridiculous.


MACCALLUM: Lori Lightfoot wants to not pay them? Good! Don't pay them. If you don't -- if you choose not to show up for your job, you shouldn't get paid. And what I find really encouraging here is that there have been some teachers who have bucked the trend, bucked the union and they said I'm showing up anyway.


MACCALLUM: This wonderful teacher who was on Fox earlier today, who is himself is being treated for cancer, he said these children are my priorities. That is why people going to teach him. That's why my mother went into teaching. My sister is an amazing teacher. But that's what they teach because they love the children. And they want to be there.

And you're right. These individuals have completely changed people's idea of teaching. And people need more agency. And that's why they are taking it.

Seven percent drop in enrollment in the Chicago public school system in the past three years. People are voting with their feet. And in places like Arizona, in West Virginia, in Florida, you can take your dollars and you can spend them the way you want.

They spend way too much money in the Chicago public school system on each child. It's obviously not working. Because you can spend a lot less in Catholic schools and other schools and charter schools and get a lot more for your money.

RIVERA: Got to move on. Stay right there. One of the world's top sports stars being held hostage, almost, over his vaccine status after this.


MCDOWELL (on camera): The family of the world's top tennis champ Novak Djokovic claims he is being treated like a prisoner over his vaccination status. The sports star finding himself holed up in an immigration detention hotel in Australia after being told he does not qualify for a medical exemption to play in the Australian Open.

Djokovic now faces deportation and has a court hearing on Monday. Now Australia says he is free to leave if he wants to. In case you didn't know, Australia imposes some of the most draconian restrictions on the planet for the unvaccinated.


MICHAEL GUNNER, CHIEF MINISTER, NORTHERN TERRITORY: You may only leave home for three reasons. Medical treatment including COVID testing or vaccination. For essential goods and services like groceries, people like taking medications. To provide care and support to a family member or person who cannot support themselves. Work is not a reason to leave the home for the unvaccinated.


MCDOWELL (on camera): Abe Vigoda, I'm going to come to you first on this. Would you ever swim back to Australia even for a visit?

GUTFELD: That's a great question, that's a great question, Dagen, but I will have to refer to Mr. Gutfeld. He is an expert on this.

MCDOWELL: All right.

GUTFELD: I love your hair.

MCDOWELL: Thank you, Mr. Vigoda.

GUTFELD: You know, Dagen, do you know what Australia has done? It's validated all your kind of weird relatives that you used to think were conspiracy freaks, right? The people that would send you disjointed e-mails with different typeface, who had on their bingo card, the government will use COVID to create a police state.

And now, it turns out they are absolutely right. At least in Australia, Australia used to be cool. You had the road warrior. You had exotic animals. You had the guy with a giant knife. Now it's like a sad combination of high school detention and house arrest. And it's like their citizens have to sit and take it.

It could go on indefinitely in Australia, which is why America is so special because our politicians know this is a country born from rising up. This country was born from having said this is it, we're not doing this anymore. We're throwing the tea into the river. We are a country of fighters. And we will do it again by February 1, because you know what, we can. We got the Second Amendment. We run this country.

MCDOWELL: To your point though, Geraldo, Australia certainly has that reputation for being free and wild. Why hasn't there been an uprising?

RIVERA: Well, first of all, I can't imagine what Greg was just saying about the Second Amendment and the February 1st. I don't get it at all. I don't know what he's threatening there.

GUTFELD: No, you didn't -- no, I wasn't threatening. Let me explain to you. The reason why this is a free country is because we have the right to bear arms.

RIVERA: Oh, well, I sailed my boat to Darwin, Australia, Northern Australia there, and they went through that boat like -- you know, I had a colonoscopy to get into Australia. They know nonsense. You guys always, you know, extol the virtue of strong borders. Australia doesn't mess around.

Djokovic, you know, broke the rules. You know, they were ham handed the way they handled his case. He is the 20 time Grand Slam champion. I regret that. But you know, rules are rules that countries are just desperate to deal with how this crazy, crazy epidemic. Everyone's trying, and you know, there's no room for ego. Let me put it that way.

MCDOWELL: Jesse, the rules were obviously not clear because he would not have gone -- and I'm not going to go into the weeds on this, but they were not clear, number one. And the bigger issue is just how -- like this is the draconian of the draconian where you had the military going door to door in -- over the summer enforcing the government's quarantine orders, the military.

WATTERS: I'm not going to go into the weeds on this with you either. It's shocking. I will say this. Australia has violated one of my core principles, which is that celebrities deserve special treatment. This man is not just a celebrity. He is the greatest tennis player of all time. He has 20 grand slams. He's tied with Nadal and Federer for 20, and he's younger than those guys, so he's going to break the record.

Would Australia disrespect Switzerland where Federer is from? Would they disrespect Spain when Nadal is from?

RIVERA: Serbia.

WATTERS: They're disrespecting Serbia by doing this. And I -- many people are asking why would they do that. I am one of those people that are asking that. He's also allegedly in a hotel room with rodents.

Let's just say a rodent bites his wrist, gets infected, has to be hospitalized, can't do a drop shot, can't do topspin, can't slice to serve. Australia is going to have to apologize to the international tennis community, Serbia, and all the networks that carry the grand slams. There actually could be foul play here.

Spain and Switzerland, I know Switzerland is often neutral, but they could have conspired Nadal and Federer to make sure the Joker doesn't leave that island. So, then, they can propel themselves to the number one title. I'm just saying it deserves an investigation.

RIVERA: That's just as incomprehensible as Gutfeld.

WATTERS: Some would say more incomprehensible.

MCDOWELL: By the way, Martha, celebrities at least, that's why Geraldo was probably upset about the boat search because he thinks celebrities do deserve special treatment.

WATTERS: You don't recognize me down under?

RIVERA: Jesse is right about that.

MACCALLUM: Well, you know what? There's something -- there's something coming up in the next segment about people who are obsessed with celebrity and it's going to be very interesting, so I tell everyone to stick around for that.

WATTERS: Oh, no.

MACCALLUM: But I would just say this, that the Chicago Teachers Union might consider moving to Australia because they would be right in line with the leadership there who says work is not a reason to leave your home.

So, maybe there's a marriage made in -- made in heaven there between the CTU and the president of Australia. It's craziness going on crazy. That's it.



MACCALLUM: Welcome back, everybody. Time for "THE FASTEST." First up, are you obsessed with all things celebrity, Kardashian, Bennifer? Researchers causing controversy by saying that it might mean that you're not as smart as other people. The harsh conclusion comes after connecting people addicted to gossip and Hollywood to performing worse on various cognitive tests, Jesse.


MACCALLUM: So, that is -- that is -- that's the question. And instead, they're trying to figure out whether it's because people have less brain power because they're obsessed with celebrity or if they just spend their time focused on celebrities because they weren't that smart to begin with.

WATTERS: It seems like I need to do some sort of damage control after what I said about celebrities in the last segment. I'm not celebrity-obsessed, Martha. I do believe though that people need to respect the laws of the jungle. And when the lion walks through the jungle, people sometimes need to get out of the way. That's all I said. I'm not obsessed.

MACCALLUM: And do you think that people --

RIVERA: You like the free drinks though.

MACCALLUM: -- who are obsessed with celebrities are not as smart, Greg?

GUTFELD: I don't know. You know, I think we've lowered the bar for being a celebrity. As a traditional world-famous star, I'm disgusted by these imposters, these real housewives, or Brian Kilmeade, even the "FOX AND FRIENDS" crew.

I like -- I'm more like -- Geraldo and I are -- we're like the classic coke of celebrities. Emphasis on coke. So, it's like -- I think that's what's happened.

WATTERS: Greg, you're nowhere near as famous as Geraldo.

GUTFELD: I could go by Gutfeld. My house goes --

MACCALLUM: Geraldo is probably -- you're the biggest celebrity on this show right now I would say, Geraldo. You've been a celebrity ever since I can remember.

RIVERA: Well, I've been on television a half a century. But there's an interesting chicken or the egg dilemma there? Are you dumb because you're into the tabs or are you into the tabs because you're dumb? You know, I don't know. I don't really invest a whole lot of emotion, capital into it. If you want to read People Magazine, go for it. If you want to read New York Magazine, go for it.

You know, I think that celebrity obsession, however is bad if you're not doing something for your own career to advance yourself and your family.

WATTERS: Have you ever been on the cover of People Magazine, Geraldo?

RIVERA: I've been on the cover of many, many magazine.

MCDOWELL: All right, Dagen, I want to start with you on this one.

RIVERA: I don't -- Newsweek, Newsweek, a couple of Newsweek.

MCDOWELL: Playgirl. He was on the cover of Playgirl.

RIVERA: Playgirl, yes.

MACCALLUM: There we go. I wish we had that for this segment.

GUTFELD: Oh, we could get it.

MACCALLUM: That'll come later. We could get it. Maybe we can get it by the end of the segment. So, Dagen, on average, men rate themselves a 5.9 out of 10.

MCDOWELL: Wait I want to -- can I respond to the celebrity thing?

MACCALLUM: Yes, of course, you can. I -- so, Greg knows I'm obsessed with serial killers. Maybe I shouldn't talk about that publicly. Secondly, though, I am obsessed with trying to figure out what work celebrities have had done on their faces in particular. So, I will take photos to my dermatologist and show him and ask him like I'm particularly fixated on Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban because I'm convinced that Keith Urban wears a rug.

MACCALLUM: Have you been able to get -- determine it -- Oh, and Geraldo just happened to have that --

GUTFELD: He had it in his bag.

MACCALLUM: -- in his back pocket.

RIVERA: I just happened to have it handy.


RIVERA: You never know when it comes up.

MACCALLUM: Oh, my God. Wait, can we see that again?

WATTERS: No, you don't.

MACCALLUM: Hold that up again. I think we need a little better look at that.

GUTFELD: Oh, my God.

RIVERA: They -- wait, they need another shot of that.

GUTFELD: Who has it?

MACCALLUM: Yes, hold it up. Where'd it go?

GUTFELD: Oh, there you go. Look at that.

MACCALLUM: Oh, that's so Geraldo.

GUTFELD: Looks like you're about to make some money on a street corner, Geraldo.

MACCALLUM: Too bad we didn't get to see the pictures on the inside.

RIVERA: Oh, let me just --


RIVERA: Let me take this thing off.

MCDOWELL: You know, your packs need work.

MACCALLUM: All right, that's all we have time for. "FAN MAIL FRIDAY" is coming your way next.


GUTFELD: What a bonanza for Abe Vigoda. Look what I got there. I got the -- I got the cover of playgirl. Look how interested Abe Vigoda is in it. Look at that. He can't take his eyes off it. Yes. Look at that. It's adorable.

WATTERS: That's a picture of Percy.

GUTFELD: Oh my God, that's Percy. I lost it. All right, let's do the mail. Television. This is a great question actually from Frenchie Firecracker. What a surprise. What is the clothing or accessory everyone hates but you secretly love? Dagen?



MCDOWELL: I think that generally I like wild prints and they don't look great on TV. But I sneak one in.

GUTFELD: Yes. You know who else like wild prints? Anyway, Martha.

MACCALLUM: I think probably a fur coat.

GUTFELD: That's -- oh, yes, everybody does hate -- they pretend to hate fur coats, but they really love fur coats. That's true.

MACCALLUM: Everybody likes a fur coat.


WATTERS: I'm kind of embarrassed to say this but I would really like a silk scarf. You know, like a nice really high-quality silk scarf to kind of put underneath my blazer and then put the collar up on my blazer. It just kind of get nice and comfortable and just like that. I don't -- I don't own one, but I would like it.

GUTFELD: Geraldo, you've been in every fashion trend known to man and woman.

RIVERA: I have.

GUTFELD: What's it ---what disgusting fashion trait do you like?

RIVERA: When I used to be six foot tall, Greg, because I had heels that were this tall. That was the -- that was the '70s. And maybe the fur coat thrown in. So, it was very, very pinfish but I enjoyed the stature.

GUTFELD: Yes. Well, I will go with the much-maligned fanny pack. We can't admit -- we can't admit it but --

WATTERS: I thought -- I definitely thought you'd like the hills, Greg.

GUTFELD: Only on the weekends, Jesse.

MCDOWELL: No, fanny packs are in, Greg. It's totally hot.

WATTERS: They're back.

GUTFELD: Yes, they're good -- they're good accouterment to the Second Amendment because when you -- when you're getting mugged, and you go, let me just get my wallet out of my fanny pack, that's the last thing they hear. So, the next question --

RIVERA: What usually happens is you shoot yourself as you pull the gun out.

GUTFELD: No, that's why you have NRA instruction, Geraldo. All right, second question.

RIVERA: All right.

GUTFELD: What is the most terrible movie that you legitimately enjoy? All right, Martha, come on.

MACCALLUM: I know this. This is Blue Crush. Blue Crush, it's a great surfer movie. It's you know, romantic comedy. There's a scene where she's like training to surf and she's carrying a rock across the bottom of the ocean. It's a great bad movie I highly recommend.

GUTFELD: All right, Jesse, what is -- what terrible movie do you legitimately enjoy?

WATTERS: Wrong Turn 1, 2, 3, 4. I liked all of them.

GUTFELD: There's four of them?

WATTERS: I don't know. But you know those like zombie mountain men that chase you down when you take the wrong turn the back of the woods with a bunch of college kids?


WATTERS: Love it.

GUTFELD: Yes. How about you, Geraldo?

MACCALLUM: Wrong Turn.

RIVERA: I love all the Rocky's, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, all of them. You know, even when he beat up the Russian guy.

WATTERS: That's not terrible.

RIVERA: Then, the Russian guy because a friend.

MCDOWELL: One is a great movie.

GUTFELD: Yes. One is a classic. Even Two is pretty good.

RIVERA: One is -- one is a great movie. Two is pretty good.


MCDOWELL: Yes, Battlefield Earth with John Travolta.

GUTFELD: Oh, wow. You've dug deep.

RIVERA: Oh, that's really bad.

MCDOWELL: Yes, it is so horrible and it's so delicious.

GUTFELD: Yes. I'm going to go with --

RIVERA: John Travolta.

GUTFELD: I'm going to go with Gone With the Wind. One of the worst movies ever but I love watching it. It's just terrible. It's a terrible film.

MACCALLUM: No. It's a great movie.

MCDOWELL: You're right. It is one of the worst movies. It is the worst movie of all time.

GUTFELD: It is terrible. I can't believe that's still on the air. All right --

MCDOWELL: I totally disagree. "ONE MORE THING" is up next.


WATTERS: It's time now for "ONE MORE THING." Before we start, Happy Birthday, Dagen.


RIVERA: Oh, Happy Birthday!

WATTERS: Happy Birthday, Dagen. We love you.

RIVERA: Happy Birthday!

MCDOWELL: I'm surprised that you did that.

MACCALLUM: Happy Birthday, Dagen!

MCDOWELL: Thank you.

WATTERS: We got some donuts to celebrate you, Dagen. I'm going to have a bite.

MCDOWELL: I'm not -- I'm not -- I don't know. My dad always told me don't eat on camera because when your mouth open, it's really ugly. This donut matches my dress though. Isn't that pretty?

WATTERS: Beautiful.

MCDOWELL: I'm 80. How do I look?

WATTERS: You look great.

MCDOWELL: Thank you guys so much.

WATTERS: Happy Birthday, Dagen.

MCDOWELL: Thank you so much. I really appreciate it.

WATTERS: All right, now it's time to celebrate myself.


WATTERS: Congratulations to "WATTERS' WORLD." We were the number one show cable news on the weekend for the year 2021.

RIVERA: Bravo! Bravo!

WATTERS: We're very proud of that. Thanks for everybody watching. Thanks to the staff. And thanks to myself who's had a great year.

We have a big show on Saturday night. We have Lindsey Graham, Kellyanne Conway, Greg's friend Marianne Williamson.


WATTERS: Who may be primarying Joe Biden -- and Raymond Arroyo. Also, we have an investigation into whether Omicron was another lab leak. You're not going to believe what the scientists found out. Greg Gutfeld.

GUTFELD: All right. Abe is joining me tonight on my show. We got Brian Kilmeade, we got Kennedy, Kat, Tyrus, Jim Florentine. It's going to be a great show. So, be sure to tune in. Also, let's do this.

Yes, you know, a lot of celebrity stuff tonight but we've been wondering what happened to Andrew Cuomo since he lost his job and where is he banned? Well, it turns out he's just been rolling along, running in place, trying to get in shape. You know, it's hard for him to get across plywood because his little scaly lizard-like feet can't get them across the floor.

But it's good to see Andrew Cuomo out and about, you know, not hiding. Anyway, that was at his pilates studio.

WATTERS: He looks good.

GUTFELD: Yes, he does look good, very slim.

WATTERS: Very, very good.

GUTFELD: Yes. You can't see the nipple -- the nipple clips.

WATTERS: Geraldo, speaking of nipples.

RIVERA: Speaking of nipples. Well, today we'd like to give a very special shout out to Fox News superfan Agnes Schleppenbach. We send our love to her all the way in Lincoln, Nebraska. Agnes is turning 100 this year. And she actually credits me for her longevity.

You see, she says that it was one of my special investigative reports on Drug Abuse, no joke, that made her quit the nasty habit of smoking many, many years ago, so she could enjoy the long life that she is enjoying right now surrounded by her loving family, 11 children, 22 grandchildren, 13 great-grandchildren.

Agnes, I know you're watching. We wish you all the best. Lots of love.

WATTERS: All right, Agnes Schleppenbach.

GUTFELD: Schleppenbach.

WATTERS: Dagen, Birthday Girl.

MCDOWELL: I don't know about girl. Old Bag, Birthday Old Bag.


MCDOWELL: Dana Perino sent me this and I just loved it so much. So, meet the Shiloh Shepherd Tinsley. She is a miracle dog. She saved her owner and another man who were involved in an automobile crash. The New Hampshire state police saw the dog in the road, were trying to catch her, but -- and she led them north across the state line to a bridge and stood on the bridge because the -- and pointed the police -- the state police to where this care -- this vehicle had rolled over. She's awesome. Everybody should have a dog that wonderful.

WATTERS: Real-life Lassie.

MCDOWELL: Yes, exactly.

WATTERS: All right, Martha, you're up.

MACCALLUM: So, there was a letter that was mailed from a World War II soldier, and he mailed it from Germany. But he mailed it 76 years ago, and it was lost in the mail for 76 years. But it finally arrived and it was delivered to his widow Angelina. And she said -- she felt like when she read his words to his mom all those years ago that, she felt like he had come back to her which is just a beautiful story.

John Gonzalez was 22-years-old when he served in World War Two and he wrote that letter in 1945 assuring his mom that he was doing A-OK. So, that's a great story. Finally, the post office was -- figured out how to deliver the letter.

WATTERS: 75 years.

MACCALLUM: Also, my Untold Story Podcast. I know, right? My Untold Story Podcast with Robert O'Neill, the former National Security Adviser is excellent. It's about the threat that we face from China. I highly suggest that you listen to it. Download it at FoxNewsPodcast.com.

WATTERS: All right, Geraldo, if you can crack open the frame for the Playgirl. Greg says he wants to see the centerfold. All right, just crack that sucker open.

GUTFELD: That's even pulled out.

RIVERA: It's beefier than the cover.

WATTERS: Have a great weekend.

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