It's a tragedy. The entertainment world is skipping the inauguration. No Elton, no Jay-Z, no Moby. I know. No Moby, that flesh-colored toilet plunger.
Let's all take a deep breath. Who the hell cares about these people? Somehow, I don't think the American public is being shortchanged by going one day without seeing Mariah Carey's sequined butt.
So when did we decide we need celebrities to anoint our events? And why should we get on our hands and knees and beg them for their presence? Why are we handing the control of the political narrative to the most insecure, misinformed people on earth? How did that work for Hillary?
The fewer of these self-serving, grim-faced jackasses at the party, the better. This is an event for America. It's not the Golden Globes, a flaccid platform for telling the foreign press how stupid Americans are. The inauguration is for the rest of us. So it's a perfect day to ignore the petulant sobs from Katy Perry.
Look at the Super Bowl halftime show: star power made it worse. Could it be that the NFL suffered as the focus shifted from pigskin to popstars? You end up with more Colin Kaepernicks and fewer Roger Staubachs. Maybe it's time to shift back.
No offense, entertainers, but your side lost because of you. So stay home, do a line, watch "Judge Judy." We'll take a marching band over Ariana Grande any day.