Gutfeld: Comparing uncivil behaviors of the left and right

This is a rush transcript from "The Greg Gutfeld Show," October 13, 2018. This copy may not be in its final form and may be updated.

GREG GUTFELD, HOST:  All right, so the news seems pretty good if you ask me.  We've got a booming economy, unemployment is still dropping.  A new Supreme Court judge who can actually stay awake. Peace is breaking out in the Koreas and American pastor's release from Turkey and I just saw Michael Avenatti downtown selling pencils.  He is so adorable in cardboard shorts.

Yes, in two years Trump solved more headaches than a boatload of Bufferin,.So what are the polls saying?  And should you believe them?

DONALD TRUMP, PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES:  I believe in polls.  Only the ones that have us up because they are the only honest -- other than that, there are the fake news polls.

GUTFELD:   I think that made sense.  So all of this great news can mean just one road for the media.  Keep looking for the bad no matter how far back you've got to go.  Check out this headline from the "Hollywood Reporter" about Donald Trump's senior policy advisor, Steven Miller.  I love this.  Miller's third grade teacher said, "He was a loner and age glue."

Holy [bleep].  Seriously, that's a real headline.  Apparently Miller would dry glue and eat it.  Meaning Miller was like every other [bleep] third grader.  Now, the teacher has been suspended for leaking this valuable info.  I hope she is home making a scrapbook with a bottle of Elmer's by her side.  But you know who is worse?  "The Hollywood Reporter," seriously, how far have you strayed from your mission as a movie industry rag to do the story.  How is eating glue Hollywood news?  I can't wait to see your next scoop as an unborn baby, Mike Pompeo, once kicked his mom right in the womb.

How much do you want to bet the teacher is a Democrat as well as the reporter and the editor?  Their hatred is so irrational that any behavior is permitted, just ask the pantsuit.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

HILLARY CLINTON, FORMER FIRST LADY OF THE UNITED STATES:  You cannot be civil with a political party that wants to destroy what you stand for and what you care about.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  Now that is funny.  I don't seem to remember her being civil to Monica, Juanita or Paula.  And is this the right time for her to lecture us on civility?  Her party just ruined a man and she tells us we are uncivil. That's like running over my dog then billing me for the burial.

By the way, Hillary and Bill are going on a tour together.  She wants to make money and he wants to make it to the R in his little black book.  She wants to pay for the second renovation of their third home.  He wants to have a foursome with triplets in a duplex.  That creates 24 different combinations, and you can bet Bill has already done the math.

So now, it's about which side is more uncivil.  If you bring up the left, the libs scream what about Trump?  He is so mean.  So my job today is to compare the uncivil behavior of the left and the right.

So first, the left.  You have got the Scalise shooting, you've got post election riots, you've got campus speech shutdowns and Antifa and remember Madonna and then, it was Johnny Depp?  There are people chased from restaurants.  Yes, Kathy Griffin.  You had mobs chanting about wanting dead cops.  That is a lot.  It's not a bug in the system, that's the whole damn system.  So what do we have on the right?  This guy.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

TRUMP:  Leaking Diane Feinstein, Pocahontas, Sleepy Joe Biden, Crooked Hillary, fake news, Dan Nang Dick, Sleepy Eyes Chuck Todd, he is a sleeping son of a [EXPLETIVE DELETED], I'll tell you.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  So he's crass, he's rough, he is rude, but it's no comparison, it's just words.  Once in a while we do get a wacko doing wacko [bleep] but our fringe stays fringe.  We do not have them over for dinner.  But the Dems have a bigger problem.  Their party is riddled with hateful factions trying to scare you into accepting their demands.  I'd call them a mob, but then the media might collapse.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Ted Cruz getting chased out of restaurants by a mob.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  Oh, you're not going to use the mob word here.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  It is totally a mob.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  A mob?  Stop.  Stop.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  That is my behavior.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Whoa, whoa, everybody stop.  Matt, we already did that. We already said they were not mobs.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  If there were tea partiers, we'd call it a mob for sure.  Come on, let's be serious, let me move past the m word.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  It's the M word now.  It's the M word.  It is funny though how they respond in sync.  It's almost like an M word.  Look, when you enable group think as an unbending intimidating force, you get a mob.  It's not new.  left-wing belief is based on marrying the personal to the political in order to mobilize then demonize.

And if they consider you evil, they are justified in doing this.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  Because I told you to.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Really?

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  Yes ...

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Yes, brother, you little white [bleep].  You are a [bleep] whitey, aren't you?

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  You just know that guy lives on someone's couch and he has an entire microbial civilization living in his pants.  So what's his white.  I know he's white.  That's just one of this problems.

Then all of this good news is making these people nuts.  :Perhaps, they need to take it out on something.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

KAT TIMPF, REPORTER, NATIONAL REVIEW:  Hey, Tom, going to the protest this weekend?

TOM SHILLUE, RADIO SHOW HOST:  I'm out.  I just can't miss another one of Cynthia's games.

TIMPF:  Maybe next time.

SHILLUE:  Yes.  Don't get me wrong, I'm an angry liberal, but I am exhausted.  I mean, he just keeps winning.  I wish there was an easier way to fight back.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  There is not with rage pillow.  The first pillow that reminds you that things are getting done even if you don't like it.  Just squeeze it and let all your frustrations out.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  No thanks to you.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  The rage pillow is so convenient you can take it anywhere.  Get angry at the office.

TRUMP:  The lowest unemployment rate.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  You can't take credit for everything.  Hi, thanks for holding.  I was on another call.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  At a restaurant.

TRUMP:  The horrendous Paris Climate Accord ...

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  You are killing mother earth.  Can I have the check?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Even at the movies.

TRUMP:  Crooked Hillary.

TIMPF:  She won the popular vote.  Abolish the electoral college.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Order now and we'll throw in the blowup pilot from airplane.  You take back the house, you've got to take back your life first with rage pillow.

TRUMP:  We're going to win so much, you will get tired of winning.

SHILLUE:  Stop winning.  Stop winning.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Warning, tearing the tag off a pillow is still a crime because America is totally over regulated.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  All right, let's welcome tonight guests.  Whenever you are YouTubing, look for Dave Rubin, creator and host -- you can steal that -- of the "Rubin Report," Dave Rubin.  She is so bright, light houses look for her in a storm, her new book is called "#DoNotDisturb," author and TV host, Jedediah Bila.  She is trim, grim and light of lim, National Review reporter Kat Timpf.  And the Eiffel tower is his towel rack, former WWE superstar and my massive sidekick, Tyrus.  Who is high.  All right.

All right, Dave, you're a classical liberal.

DAVE RUBIN, CREATOR, THE RUBIN REPORT:  I am.

GUTFELD:  You are.  So I am going will turn you into what is wrong with your party question.  What's going on?

RUBIN:  Well, first off, did I hear that correctly, Leaking Diane Feinstein?  Leaking like he really is good at this.

GUTFELD:  He is.  He is.

RUBIN:  He really is.

GUTFELD:  It conjures up two different kinds of leaks.  What are your thoughts?

RUBIN:  I mean, look, this was what was going to would happen if you ran around for years screaming that everyone of you guys and you evil people on Fox were all racist and bigots and homophobes. Of course, the endgame was going to be that you'd end up using violence against these people and condoning it.  And that thing in Portland, it's like these guys, they call themselves Antifa, they are the FA -- they are the fascist.  They are the fascist.  They literally dress like soldiers -- covert soldiers from GI Joe and they think they are the good guys.  Something is seriously wrong.

GUTFELD:  I like that they self-appointed themselves as crossing guards. Like, that is the first step.

RUBIN:  Yes, and also, it is a type of mental disorder to be a white person screaming at another white person over his whiteness.  That's a modern mental disorder.

GUTFELD:  Tyrus, I saw you practically leap out of your comfortable chair when you heard the M word.

GEORGE "TYRUS" MURDOCH, FORMER WWE SUPERSTAR:  I was like what word?  White people are attacking each other, the M word is the new N word.  It has never been a better time to be black.  I am -- like, we made it.  Sorry, like, I have never seen a white guy talk to a white guy like that.  That is hurtful.  That sucks for him to be white and be talked to like that by another whiter guy, actually.  What is that?

RUBIN:  It's white on white violence.

GUTFELD:  It is.

MURDOCH:  It's terrible, man.  I feel bad for those guys.  It is amazing that they always -- I never had those issues at a crosswalk.  I've never had someone say, "Hey, go this way or turn that way."  They always pick the guy who looks a little -- a little like you a little bit.

GUTFELD:  I know where you are going.  I know where you're going.  Okay ...

MURDOCH:  He barely sees over the steering wheel.  Let's go pick on that kid.

GUTFELD:  He is height shaming.  You are height shaming me.

MURDOCH:  No, I am car shaming.  They need to make higher seats.

GUTFELD:  I don't even have a driver's license, this will never happen to me.  But you are making a great point and now I forgot what it was.  It had to do with -- okay, so these two Netflix employs chased Brian Kilmeade, he was leaving his agent.  They chased him down to a subway and then they went to the subway and they incited the people in the subway to target him. They won't do that to you, Tyrus.  They'll do it to Kilmeade.

MURDOCH:  Especially if they chased me into a subway because I'm luring them.  I am not being chased so if you get in a subway with me in the door is closed, that's your ass. Not mine.

GUTFELD:  Jedediah, I will defend people who out of power for their desire to express rage, but it seems like the left is always expressing rage whether they are in or out of power.

JEDEDIAH BILA, TV SHOW HOST:  They are always mad about something.  You can express rage, but you can't destroy property.  You can't go out there -- everyone always talks and defends the First Amendment.  I defend the First Amendment, too, but you can't go out there and destroy businesses.  You can't get in people's faces in restaurants and drive them out of spaces.

That -- I hate to break it to CNN, that is the definition of a mob -- a bunch of people that make your life incredibly under difficult and they are in-your-face.  And it's so crazy to me because you are seeing these people in most media outlets reveal themselves to be exactly who they really are. You have anchors that are supposed to be moderating the debates and they are so mad and so defensive because Trump won and they're still mad about it and now they have to defend this mob that they're compelled to jump in and actually, they are on the partisan side now, they are not playing moderator anymore.

GUTFELD:  They are not moderating -- they are mob-erating.

BILA:  It is crazy.

GUTFELD:  Kat, I want to talk about the teacher, but do you have thoughts about the mob?  Or would like to discuss the third grade teacher?

TIMPF:  I can discuss whatever you want.  I am very versatile.

GUTFELD:  Very -- why don't you pick -- surprise me.

TIMPF:  Well, I can do both quickly.

GUTFELD:  Okay, please do.

TIMPF:  I can say first of all, no judging on eating glue.  When I was a child I used to love to eat the delicious rock salts that they use to melt the snow.

GUTFELD:  Yes, yes.

TIMPF:  And I was actually quite popular in the first grade.  As for the mob mentality it was not just Hillary Clinton this week, it was also Eric Holder saying when they go low, we kick them.  Not only is that not nice, that's also not very effective because if I am on the ground and someone is kicking me I'm not going to be thinking, "Gee, I would love to thoughtfully consider this person's views on healthcare and immigration."   thinking why is this [bleep] kicking me?

And so if they really want to actually have these meaningful dialogues about issues and actually make a change, then you have to be civil.

GUTFELD:  Yes, we've got to move on, but I still -- I don't understand somebody from the "Hollywood Reporter" call me and tell why you would do that story right when you call the "Hollywood Reporter" and you're a movie industry journal.  I don't understand it.  I mean, if only there was a story about a producer who has been raping people for 25 years.  Maybe that would be a story that the "Hollywood Reporter" could have covered.

It was the summit heard round the world.  Kanye-Trump and a melting media.

Thursday the West Wing became the holy crap it is Kanye West wing.  As another day in Trump world reached the real unifying benefits, so how does the media take this?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Wow.  Okay, I'm doing this for everybody who is watching us who turned their volume down because you can put it back up again.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  But if you think you're going to get a thoughtful play-by-play and political analysis you are not.  That was an assault on our White House.

UNIDENTIFIED FEMALE:  Today was bonkers and it was crazy.  It was off the rails.  I thought it was really sad.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  Oh, sad.  Been there.  Watch down Don Lemon go low real fast.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

DON LEMON, ANCHOR, CNN:  This was an embarrassment.  Kanye's mother is rolling over in her grave.  I spoke to one of her friends today or texted with one of her friends today from Chicago, Donda's friend, I used to live there, I know them.  She said, "Donda would be embarrassed by this."

He needs a father figure.  He needs someone to help him and guide him, and needs a hug more than anything.  Kanye, back away from the cameras.  Go get some help and then come back and make your case.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  So I know somebody in this town and so that means, I know what his mother thinks.  You are a [bleep].  Makes me wonder.  You don't bring up somebody's dead mom.  I wonder if he'd ever say that to anyone's face or perhaps to Jim Brown who was just six inches from Kanye.

So when it was obvious -- I mean, you could love it or hate it, but there was a lot of love in that room.  CNN always delivers the hate.  They are the hate channel.  But Kanye does not care.  I wonder if that hat gives him power in some way?

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

KANYE WEST, AMERICAN ARTIST:  This hat, it gives me power in a way.  I love Hillary and I love everyone, right?  But the campaign, I am with her just did not make me feel as a guy that did not get to see my dad all the time, like a guy that gets to play catch with his son.  It was something about, when I put this hat on, it made me feel like superman.  You made a superman.  That's my favorite super hero and you make a superman cape ...

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  All right.  So what was Kanye's message overall?  It was about being the best.  It was about making our own stuff here, making it better and creating more jobs.  Who does he sound like?  Here's a hint.  If you don't look good, we don't look good.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

WEST:  If you don't look, we don't look good.  This is our President.  He has to be the freshest, the flyest, the flyest planes, the best factories and we are putting people in positions that have to do with illegal things to end up in the cheapest factory ever -- the prison system.

TRUMP:  I will tell you what, that was pretty impressive.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  It was also pretty wild and it was unique, but if these two want to work together on race relations or fewer murders in Chicago, who is to say they can't get it done?  Only the bitter scolds of that nay-saying media who wish it was them having an impact, not those two.  Especially this guy.  He truly is a lemon.  Jedediah, he's a lemon because he's bitter and sour about all of this.  I get that this was kind of a spectacle, but the problem with that genius is that it all happened so quickly and then you go back and have to go through and he -- there were about seven or eight things that he talked about that were bigger points that were kind of missed.  Event just stuff about -- even the stuff about Colin Kaepernick about having him come to the White House.  That's an important thing.

BILA:  I mean, this made me really mad because I don't understand why Kanye-- whether you agree with Kanye or not, I don't understand why he was treated this way.  Like, what is the problem?  All of a sudden now, celebrities can't go into the White House?  They have been going to the White House for years.

Obama had a trillion celebrities come in.  They weren't all policy experts, they were there to talk about some issues.  They were there to give their take.  This guy is just saying his piece and nobody can stand that this guy has a different opinion from most people in Hollywood and most people in the mainstream media, so they've got to take him out.  They've got to paint them to be psychotic and he's a maniac and he is ill and they infantilize him and they make fun of him.

I understand maybe you did not like this segment, but don't talk to me about how this guy Kanye is disgracing the Oval Office when you defending Bill Clinton.  Like save it for another time, honestly.  Nobody did there what Bill Clinton did.

GUTFELD:  Tyrus, I do think that there is some truth about the father thing because when Kanye is talking to Trump, I believe that he sees him as a father figure.

MURDOCH:  Right.  Why not?

GUTFELD:  Why not?  That is my theory.

MURDOCH:  That's a great theory.  You are coming to me to talk about fathers.  I don't have one either, Kanye.  It's not a big deal.  I got over it.  The worst thing in this whole thing that you're missing on the tape was the hug scene.

GUTFELD:  Oh, I know -- I forgot that.

MURDOCH:  Because here's the thing.  Kanye was star struck.  He was so excited to meet his President and he did babble and he did act a fool, but every time people meet people in life that they are in awe of or have a love for, sometimes it gets a little jumbled like some of the people -- I took pictures tonight with some people, and a few of them were like, hey, Titus, it was a good show.  Or yo, Tyrone, can I get a picture?  They know it is Tyrus, but in the moment they got weird or if the picture doesn't go fast enough.  The wife says, "Oh, my husband is blind," anyway remember that one?

You say weird things in the moment, so the part with Trump was -- it's very hard to get our President speechless and Kanye did that [bleep].  He had him speechless.  But he went in for the hug.  He went in for I love you, sir hug and Donald went for the side like, "hey," like it -- that was the awkward.  What's that hug backwards.  It sounds like, yes, [bleep].  He out trumped Trump in that situation.  And Kanye doesn't represent black people, he doesn't represent singers, white people, angry white people who hate white people, he represents himself supporting his President and the media jumped all over it, but that was his moment with the President.  He had every right to express himself that way.  Good for him.

GUTFELD:  All right, Kat, pretty weird but interesting.  Surreal.

TIMPF:  Yes, I mean, I've never seen anything like that in my life and I once saw a man bandaged a bleeding toe with 20-dollar bills on the subway.

GUTFELD:  That was Doocy, right?

TIMPF:  Yes, it was actually.  And yes, the love and tenderness between those two men, they were hugging, they were saying I love you.  I haven't seen any such innocent, pure, tender innocent love like that since high school when I was watching my high school crush and his girlfriend at the dance from the bleachers but he was -- he is talking about a lot of issues that liberals should be excited about like stop and frisk is bad or like prison reform and these are things that liberals are talking about as important issues and rather than saying, oh, that is great.  Maybe the President will focus on some of these issues that matter to us.  They have to hate on it because hating on Trump is more important to them than solving anything at all.

GUTFELD:  Yes, you know -- I also think that people are a little envious of the impact that Kanye might be having.  I don't know.

RUBIN:  Oh, yes, there's a huge amount of jealousy.  First off, I want that hat.  If that hat, that he puts that hat on and feel like superman. There are drugs in that hat.  I want that hat.  That would be pretty good.  But what is the word -- there's a word -- I can't remember what it is?  What's the word when you look at a group of people and you judge them on the color of their skin and not the content of their character?  What would be to work for someone that would do something like that?

GUTFELD:  Titus.

MURDOCH:  Racist.

RUBIN:  Yes, this is sort of -- this is the new racism.  They don't want a black guy that's willing to say some uncomfortable things and there's a pernicious new racism and that's why they are freaking out because they're actually losing control of a group of people that they have controlled for long time.  You know what they are, Greg?

GUTFELD:  What?

RUBIN:  They are the M word.

GUTFELD:  How dare you.  Disgusting.  We must go to break.  Up next, how many Americans are tired of being politically correct?  Let's just say more than a few?

And have you bought my book yet? The "Gutfeld Monologues," it so good it will make you throw up.  It's available everywhere, but get this, if that's not enough, I'll be doing two live shows in December called the "Gutfeld Monologues," and it's live and the tickets are going fast.  Grand Rapids, Michigan, San Antonio, Texas.  I'm telling you now so you've got more than enough time to buy tickets for you, your relatives and people you love. Got to ggutfeld.com for ticket info.

ROBERT GRAY, CORRESPONDENT, FOX NEWS:  Live from "America's News Headquarters," I'm Robert Gray.  A White House welcomed nearly two years in the making.  Freed American pastor Andrew Brunson heading to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue shortly after returning to the US.  Brunson praying for the President as the Oval Office meeting turned into a prayer session. Brunson was accused of spying and aiding terrorists.  He was released after nearly two years in detention in Turkey.  His freedom was a high priority for Christian evangelical leaders who praised the President for bringing him home.

Hundreds packed a church in upstate New York to say goodbye to eight people, including four sisters, killed in a limousine crash.  Eighteen people in the vehicle including the driver and two pedestrians died one week ago.  The limo company's owner has been charged with criminally negligent homicide.  I'm Robert Gray, now back to "The Greg Gutfeld Show."

GUTFELD:  Will be finally see the end of the PC.  A new report found that 80% of the population believe political correctness is a problem in our country and it's a belief felt by everyone -- young, old, black, white, Asian, Hispanic, Native Americans -- all of them think PC thought sucks.  I call that unity.

Two thirds of Americans fall into the exhausted majority who are tired of the polarization and tiptoeing around the easily offended.  And get this, only 8% of Americans are progressive activists.  The leftist of the left. Those are the ones who push the PC, meaning only 8% is telling us what we can and cannot say.  That seems like tyranny.

Anyway, so has PC culture limited speech in any way?  Well, I found books that were supposed to be published this year but because of the PC culture, they aren't going to be published.  Here are a few of them and I'm very angry about this.  This one of the first books I found right here.  It's called "Spotty Sally, Betty Blemish, and Pigment Pam, 1000 Names to Call Girls with freckles.  This is terrible.  This is the stuff we are going to lose.

Your dad looks like your dad's best friend.  No, sorry, you look like your dad's best friend.  500 clever sayings for birthday clowns.  Terrible. This is the stuff we are missing.  Kids who do cartwheels are stupid and have no friends.  One hundred facts about childhood no one told you because you smell.  It brings it all home.  This is an interesting one.  Your baby is actually really ugly.  So stop bringing him to lunch, Debra.  This is really specific.  I'm trying to get my unlimited mimosas on $29.95.

I think a producer wrote that for somebody at home.  All right, this is -- this book is actually written by Ryan Gosling.  Yes, it's true.  I find you grossly unattractive.  A list of 10,000 Americans I find grossly unattractive.  Shall we stop there?  Let's see.  how about this one.  If you live at home until you are 25, you're not a struggling millennial, you are just a loser.

I did not see that one coming.  All right, Kat, I think that this study is much bigger than people think because political correctness, if you look at the numbers, over 80% of each ethnicity detest PC culture and this could be the thing that unifies a country and kills identity politics.

TIMPF:  I hope so and I do find this encouraging, but I don't find it totally encouraging because you have to think about just how powerful that small PC obsessed mob is.  Because all they have to do is say that something is sexist or something is racist and all of a sudden people might not want to associate with that even if it's something totally ridiculous like hoop earrings being racist cultural appropriation.  Something -- one of the ridiculous examples that I've ever written about on "National Review" if people hear that, they might just say, "Okay, I don't want to stay away from it because I don't want to be called a racist or a sexist," and so they have a lot of power in those accusations even though they are in the minority.  So we need to remember that they are in the minority and fighting for the ability to speak like normal people and act like normal people because that is something that is very important.

GUTFELD:  So attack the minorities is what you're saying.  Jesus, Kat, Terrible.  Don't applaud that.  Okay, to her point, she is speaking about the big problem which is there's a tiny mob that sounds like a large mob because they're so loud.  They come after people like you.  You had a guest on your show, Claire Lehmann from Quillette.  She said the words that I've not forgotten.  Share the risk, which means if every single person shares the risk, the little mob goes away.  But it's when we all hide because we go -- oh, maybe they won't come for me, so the crocodile will eat you last theory, but everybody goes like, they're going after Kat and if they go after Kat, they will not go after me.

RUBIN:  Yes, well, they get one and then they go for more.  So if you stand there, then they will stop.  This is what our friend, Eric Weinstein calls the Chihuahua effect.  That basically, they are just a little yapping yipping dog that's making a lot of sound but you could kick that thing to the corner really easily.

GUTFELD:  It's another size-ism on this panel.  It's ridiculous.

RUBIN:  I was not talking about you just because I said Chihuahua.

GUTFELD:  Well, that was my nickname in high school mainly because I was hairless.  Tyrus.

MURDOCH:  The problem is that people that control that, it's the mainstream media and it's people who have a large voice.  Like a perfect example, when we had situations where an opinion columnist will say something on a TV show that is tough, no one wants to hear it and then someone will come on TV and they go, "I was offended."  And I don't think a sponsor should protect you or anything.  The sponsor should leave and the CEOs will automatically bail.

GUTFELD:  HR.

MURDOCH:  They will jump because it could be -- it could be a problem. Instead of like, you know what?  Let's see what happens.  Maybe this one bleeding heart cry baby isn't that important, but they give that power and they don't take it.  We give it to them.

GUTFELD:  It's all true and it's so frustrating, Jedediah, it's the corporate that will just throw you aside if they don't want the problem. They don't want the bad PR.

BILA:  Right, and it's interesting because I think people started years ago embracing the PC culture because they were like, we want to be polite and we want to be nice and now, everyone is united because they're terrified to speak.  They are terrified to say anything out of fear that they are going to be labeled something and it's this united power, like people are afraid to tweet because if you tweet something, 25 years later it could come back and you're out of a career.

GUTFELD:  Yes, it's like herpes.

BILA:  So now everyone -- yes, exactly.

GUTFELD:  Not that I would know.

RUBIN:  Well, did you see this week that the ABC executives and now they are saying they may have jumped the gun by getting rid of Roseanne because they think "The Connors" is going to do poorly.  It's like, "Oh, you got rid of Roseanne from the "Roseanne" show ..."

GUTFELD:  It will be reboot number three.  That's amazing.  Well, all I know is we missed out on a lot of great books because of this PC culture.

MURDOCH:  We can't have debates anymore.

GUTFELD:  We can't have debates.  No, you can't.  Sit quietly in a room and drink heavily.  Up next, goodbye candy bars and hello prison bars.  A Virginia town threatening teens with jail time.  This is like the best ad ever, if they trick or treat.

It's no more Halloween when you turn 13.  In Chesapeake, Virginia anyone over 12 caught trick-or-treating could face fines and jail time of up to six months.  In other news, I'm moving to Chesapeake, Virginia.  Because it's not so much about the treating they care about, but the ticking. Meaning, taking pumpkins from porches and smashing them in the street.

So is this ageist or appropriate?  All I know is that banning 13-year-olds from trick-or-treating poses a problem for me since for Halloween I often go as a 13 -year-old -year-old.  Anyway, so if you are heading out this Halloween and you're tired of all the usual costumes, do we have some ideas for you.

(BEGIN VIDEO CLIP)

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  It's that time of year again when you search and search for a Halloween costume, but can't seem to find one that's right for you.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  I'm tired of all these costumes that objectify my body. They all work the same.  Honestly, I'm out of ideas.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  It sounds like, you could use a costume that is fair and balanced.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  OH, yes.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Introducing the Fox News favorite faces costume collection.  Each outfit comes with a unique design so there is no mistaking which cable newsroom you are representing this Halloweein.

Like the Brian Kilmeade, this custom comes complete with dark jacket, light shirt, khakis and a bold but tasteful tie.  Or how about the Steve Doocy with his awesome looking dark jacket, light shirt, khakis and a bold but tasteful tie.  We've even had Tucker Carlson with his one-of-a-kind dark jacket, light shirt, khakis and a bold but tasteful tie.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  I don't know.  Got anything else?

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Then try the Greg Gutfeld.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  Wow, take my money now.

UNIDENTIFIED MALE:  It's the Fox News favorite faces costume collection. Order now and we'll throw in this year's hottest costume, the my pillow guy.

(END VIDEO CLIP)

GUTFELD:  Yes, Kat, you're still trick-or-treating and you are almost 40.

TIMPF:  That is so mean.  That is so mean.  I don't still trick-or-treat, Greg.  I drink now.  Although ...

GUTFELD:  You trick or treated through high school?

TIMPF:  I trick-or-treated all the way through high school.  What was I supposed to do?  Drink.  Right?  I mean, other kids probably were, but they were not inviting me, so I did not drink.  But I also just wanted to continue to be a child as long as possible, certainly past the age of 13. When you're 13 you're still a kid, going out with friends and getting candy, it's still a fun thing and now that I'm pushing 30.  I'm glad that I have those childhood memories.

I mean, think about the founding fathers sitting there thinking about the future of our government and our country.  I highly doubt that they would have envisioned the government interfering to stop a 13 -year-old from asking a neighbor for candy, let alone putting them in jail forever.  I mean, we've completely lost her minds.

GUTFELD:  The founding fathers did not invent Halloween though, I think.

RUBIN:  That's true, but George Washington ...

TIMPF:  But there was candy.

RUBIN:  George Washington did have serious issues with his teeth.

GUTFELD:  Yes.

TIMPF:  Lots of candy.

GUTFELD:  Yes, it's true.  Made of wood.  Do you still celebrate Halloween?

RUBIN:  No, he didn't have wooden teeth.

GUTFELD:  Yes, that's a lie.  It's a lie.  He had something else that was wooden.

RUBIN:  I'm just tossing them out for you.

GUTFELD:  Yes, what do you make of this?

RUBIN:  Well I've noticed that almost everyone here is cursed tonight, so I'm going to say this is just [bleep] like this people, they want to just suck the fun out of everything.  They want us all to be as miserable as they are.  If you want to go get candy, get some candy.  If you want to sit home and not have candy, don't have candy.  How about that for a radical position.

GUTFELD:  I like that, Tyrus.  Are you home for trick-or-treaters?

MURDOCH:  Yes, they are so excited when I come to the door.  I'm not a big Halloween guy just because no customs fit.  But I have like two choices.  I could put a bolt on each neck or throw some green stuff on my face. Halloween is not my thing, but this poses a lot of other problems.  Like in that city, like our Comicons are going to be like sanctuary cities like you can -- because you can go around those creepy bastards up (inaudible) and 365 now.  Everyone is a sexy fox or lobster or whatever the hell or unicorn, in your case, animals can be sexy.  It's not my thing, but I'm just saying.  You could be a sexy fox if you wanted to.

But the point is like, this is exactly what Kat says, a complete overkill. And a thirteen -year-old is still a child.  What happens if dad dresses up with you and the kids run away from dad for a second, does he get tackled in the street and beat up?  Sicko, dressing up.  He's clearly over 13.

GUTFELD:  That's what I tell people when I am arrested that I left my kid in the park.  Jed, I remember, you showed up in "The View" dressed as Betty Boop.

BILA:  I knew you were going to bring this up.

MURDOCH:  What chapter is that in the book?

BILA:  That did not make the book.  I did and you said what about it?  That you were at the stair master and said, "Ooff."

GUTFELD:  Yes, she came out dancing as a Betty Boop on "The View" and it was so painful.

BILA:  I did.  I had a giant Betty Boop head.

GUTFELD:  Yes, it was bad.  It was awful and I feel bad.  But you know what ...

BILA:  I like Betty Boop though.

GUTFELD:  What did Joy Bejar come as?

BILA:  I don't remember.

GUTFELD:  I think it was Joy Behar.  It's great when people get arrested on Halloween because they get their mug shot in the costume and my buddy and I swear on a stack of Bibles or those books, he went in Halloween as a convict, so he was in stripes and he has a plastic ball and chain.  So he got arrested for -- I'm not going to say what was, but it's a common crime and he was booked and in jail overnight and everybody just ripped him to shreds.

BILA:  That's great.

GUTFELD:  Yes, it's a good story.

BILA:  Remember when Halloween ...

RUBIN:  Tucker Carlson.

GUTFELD:  How did you guess it?  It was not Tucker.  All right. we've got another story after this.  Stormy's lawyer challenges Donald Trump, Jr. to a fight.  No, he's not clinging to the spotlight for dear life at all.

GUTFELD:  Would you please bite me he asked as his 15 minutes of fame almost passed.  It's a smear moments before plunging into the bottomless abyss of obscurity.  Michael Avenatti, a.k.a. Captain Cue Ball had some sad tweets this week.  Because he had the spare time after those gang rape claims against Kavanaugh fell apart and now the cable news shows aren't taking his calls, so let's see what he's been tweeting about.

He wants to challenge Donald, Jr. to a mixed martial arts fight, of course, for charity and then the list of charities he would fight for and that he was just waiting for Biff to confirm.  Well, Biff has not confirmed and neither has Don, Jr.  I wonder if Mikee is doing any training for the fight?

Hey Tyrus, this seems like right up your alley.

MURDOCH:  I believe I will let my words do the talking for me.  Do we have a cue of the response?  He actually did get a response.  He did get a response.  Do we have it?  "If Donald Trump, Jr. can't do it, I'm your Huckleberry.  And it's for a good cause and I will donate my side of the charities of your choice."

GUTFELD:  That would be fun.

BILA:  I'm just imaging the visual of you and Michael Avenatti.

GUTFELD:  Oh my goodness.  Do you know what I think is clever though?  He cloaks his self-promotion in victims, so the first was Stormy Daniels, then the gang rape accuser and now he used charity.  All this is like, he's so, "I'm so compassionate," but it's just to keep his name alive.

TIMPF:  I just do not get what is going on.  We have Joe Biden trying to fight Trump.  Now we've got Avenatti trying to fight Trump Junior, why don't they just call each other names behind each other's backs?  That's what women do.  What is with these men?  It works out fine for us.

GUTFELD:  Yes, it does.  Jed?

BILA:  I like a good mud wrestle.

GUTFELD:  Oh, yes?

BILA:  Yes, I mean ...

MURDOCH:  Got that in the book?

BILA:  That is in the book.  Well played, my friend.  And I would like to thank Tyrus and Greg Gutfeld for trying to sell my book tonight.

GUTFELD:  He's the worst lawyer ever, right?

MURDOCH:  He's a bad person.

GUTFELD:  Yes, he is.

MURDOCH:  He's just really is a bad ...

GUTFELD:  He's just using his clients for climbing towards the spotlight at CNN.

MURDOCH:  He will get a spotlight if he lets me take Don Junior's spot.  I guarantee you, I will have five or eight seconds ...

BILA:  Not even.  Not even.

GUTFELD:  Final thoughts, if we have them, next.  We are out of time. Thanks to Dave Rubin, wonderful Jedediah, Katherine, Tyrus and our studio audience.  I'm Greg Gutfeld, and I love you, America.  He does, too.

END

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