It was a competition on "The Hills" this week to see who could be the bigger betrayer, and it looks like a photo finish.

The biggest scandal at hand is, of course, “Dinnergate 2008.” And now that everyone knows that Stephanie Pratt and Doug Reinhardt dated behind Lauren Conrad’s back, the pertinent question is how they’ll explain themselves.

That is of course unless you’re Stephanie, who apparently thinks the pertinent question is where Lauren got that new dress she’s sporting. The ignore-that-giant-elephant approach might have made sense were Lauren not practically teaching said elephant circus tricks to get Stephanie to bring it up. Finally, Lauren just broaches the topic herself, and suddenly we learn that trying to ignore the issue was actually the best strategy Steph had.

It takes her all of one second to not only throw Doug under the bus, but back that baby up a few times in a web of lies so tangled Lauren can only respond with a puzzled look and awkward silence. But of all those lies, not a single one makes any sense, and more importantly, did she forget about those GIANT CAMERAS that taped the whole thing anyway??

Realizing she’s quickly sinking, Stephanie enlists some backup; unfortunately, it’s from the sacrificial lamb himself. Unaware Steph’s all but called him a stalker, Doug promises to have her back and ensure that any naysayers will “BOOM, be quiet.” But just as we start feeling bad for Doug, we realize what he really meant was that he’ll be quiet as Brody Jenner laces into her, then, once the accusations start flying Doug’s way, “BOOM,” he’ll blame it all on her.

Unlike the double crossing duo, however, Brody clearly hates the “be quiet” plan. In fact, I’ve never seen a guy that antsy to run his mouth about his own hookup, let alone someone else’s. He may act like he’s just trying to be a good friend and protect Lauren, but it looks to me like someone was more bothered by Lauren and Doug’s “fling” then he let on.

Either way, now that Brody has outed Doug for everything he told him in confidence about Stephanie, the cat’s out of the bag and the Pratt’s out of the party … with a few more lies for old time’s sake.

But Lauren’s not the only one dealing with a band of betrayers.

Heidi Montag comes to learn that after taking her sister into her home free of charge, and asking that she not tell their parents that Spencer Pratt is also living there, Holly has repaid the hospitality … by ratting her out.

When Mama Montag pays a surprise visit, it’s obvious why Heidi opted to hide her reunion with Spencer: her mom clearly hates him. On the other hand, it’s also clear why that is: Spencer’s a total jerk, even to her.

What’s not clear is how on earth Heidi could be with someone who treats her family so poorly, so blatantly. Not only does she allow him to talk down to her sister and mother, but she actually makes her mother cry for suggesting he’s trying to come between their family (which he is).

But it looks like this allegiance to Spencer will soon grow fragile as the Montag fam prepares to enlist Lauren as their new secret weapon. Could it be that Heidi will finally ditch Spencer to reunite with Lauren? That, my friends, would be the biggest and best betrayal of them all.