While lounging around in my shorty robe watching "Designing Women," I came across a study which does not bode well for clowns: 250 children were surveyed and each one of them said they feared clowns.
At first, I wasn't fazed: We all know that face paint is the mark of the anti-Christ. But then I thought about it some more and I realized that, of all the special interest groups left on the planet, it's the "Bozos" and "Bubbles" who are subjected to bigotry and ridicule.
Who cries when you bully a clown? No one — in fact, in the South, it's encouraged.
But are clowns really that different from you and me? Sure, they wear water-based makeup, giant rubber shoes, foam noses, balloon-print cummerbunds and ride around in Volkswagens with 18 of their friends, but can you honestly say that you don't do the same? Can you?
Yes, we've seen a few bad eggs: Serial killer John Wayne Gacy did nothing to help the plight of the clown. But he was also a shoe salesman. How come no one mentions that?
I'd like you to take a look at your own clown prejudice. Because frankly, I don't think there's room in this world for your Bozo-phobia.
And if you disagree with me then you, sir, are worse than Hitler.