A Vancouver mom plans to complain to a human rights tribunal after employees interrupted her breast feeding at a clothing store.
While her hubby tried on clothes, Manuela Valle tried to nurse her baby, until workers sent her to a changing room they assigned for such practices. (And all this time, I've been drilling holes in the wrong dressing rooms).
The leaky lady says this made her feel like a shoplifter. And so, now activists have organized a "nurse in" at the store. I don't know what that is exactly, but I'm thinking of arriving in a diaper.
And maybe that's why I sympathize with the store. I mean, as a dude, I am hardwired to stare at breasts. Sorry, it's a biological fact, backed up by reams of data proving mammaries are male eye magnets. Apparently, breasts are designed to attract men to the front of a woman, so, they will engage in sex that leads to species survival. It's nature's neon sign that says, "Hey, stupid — not the butt — over here."
Naturally, when I see a naked breast, even with a baby attached, I stare. Then, when I'm caught by the mom, I feel weird and end up leaving the store — sometimes nude.
So, if you want to breast feed in public, fine. But don't get pissed if I watch. It's not my fault, like it's not your fault to feel compelled to feed your baby. In a sense, my eyes are like two little infants, who also need sustenance.
So, I'll see you at the "nurse in." I'll be the one in the bib.
And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler.