If You Believe in Progressive Ideas, You'll Believe in Anything

So what have we learned so far about the Obama presidency?

Well, that you need not elect a Clinton to get all the Clinton washouts. Including, perhaps, a Clinton herself.

But my favorite appointment, so far, is John Podesta, the chief of Obama's transition team. If you don't remember, he's the dude who helped pardon scumbag Mark Rich and a few unrepentant terrorists.

But I'm more enamored by his love for little green men. Back in 2002, Podesta formed a group called the Coalition for Freedom of Information, which demanded access to secret government records on UFOs.

So right after 9/11, the worst attack on American soil ever, thank God there was someone in D.C. who had their priorities in order. I mean, maybe Martians did bomb the World Trade Center.

Look, I don't dispute that aliens exist, but there are more urgent matters to deal with, other than wrinkly creatures with a knack for anal probing.

But enough about Barney Frank.

See, I've always felt that people into UFOs are loony, in that normal life is so complicated, they cling to conspiracies for intellectual comfort. If you disagree with them, then you're blind to the truth, which is as real as David Duchovny's sex addiction.

But I like the UFO obsession because it points out a peculiar aspect of progressivism. That is, if you believe in progressive ideas, you'll believe in anything, including alien conspiracies. Worse, it's a symptom of backward prioritizing that's especially retarded when you've got real terror at your doorstep.

Me, I would love the idea of the existence of little green men. Imagine the back rubs you could get with those long bony fingers.

And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Klaatu!

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com