'Gigli,' 'American Wedding' and 'Spy Kids'

"Gigli," "American Wedding" and "Spy Kids" are in The Foxlight.

Call Grandma to the table, Thanksgiving is a little early this year. We have the turkey — it's the new Ben and Jen fiasco, "Gigli." What we didn't know is how crude the language and sexual references were going to be. And, befitting a turkey, there's even a scene where J-Lo asks Ben-Lo for some oral gratification by saying, "Gobble, gobble." Still have your lunch? By the way, that quick glimpse of Al Pacino in the trailer? That's his whole part. He owed the director, who guided him to an Oscar in "Scent Of A Woman," a favor. This movie has the scent of roadkill, according to nearly every critic — except one-time comedian and "Real People" host Byron Allen. He's the only critic quoted in the ad. Lonely are the brave.

Hey if you like your Hidden Valley Raunch a little lighter, how about "American Wedding"? Most of the "American Pie" gang is back, and I can only guess what's going to happen to that wedding cake. Jason Biggs is marrying the girl from band camp — and if the flute is coming along for the honeymoon, I don't want to know about it. Critics think the trilogy is pretty much played out.

So can another three-timer be number one again this weekend? Hold on to your 3-D glasses, but "Spy Kids" probably doesn't have a chance against the one-dimensional "American Wedding."