Updated

Dear Friends,

My favorite whopper of the day is all the Democratic (search) candidates (well, other than Kerry) insisting that they don't need to win a primary or caucus this coming Tuesday.

Yeah, right! Five primaries, two caucuses and money's tight unless you're JK. I hear from folks who know that, come Tuesday, if you don't rack up a decent number of delegates, you get a phone call from Terry McAuliffe – the hatchet man of the DNC -- telling you that you're hurting the Democratic Party and you've got to get out of the race.

Major newspapers are starting to say candidates like Al and Dennis shouldn't even be covered by the press because they don't count. Other people are expected to start demanding that they get excluded from future debates because they haven't a prayer of winning.

Oh, one more thing: my favorite “Twilight Zone” moment of Friday's show. A guy named Firpo (Firpo?) emerges from the Jackson family house, delivers a news conference speaking out against the Vanity Fair article alleging Michael's weirdness with wine in Coke cans, etc... then abruptly declares he's not a spokesman for the Jackson Family.

Okay then, what ARE you?

Apparently, Firpo is MJ's "spiritual adviser".

I swear I'm not making that up.

What do you think? Drop me an e-mail: dayside@foxnews.com

Have a great weekend.

Linda