Face It: Robots Just Aren't That Into Us

So, car crashes could disappear if we let robots drive. Experts now claim that robot cars can eliminate driver error, falling asleep at the wheel and the panic one feels when driving nude.

I don't buy this at all.

First, how do we know robots won't have the same problems we have?

Will older robots drive slower and leave their left blinker on?

Will dainty robots in VW bugs apply makeup while driving?

Will humanoids with small genitals drive Hummers?

I also don't trust robots to do what I say. I don't even trust my clock radio to wake me up on time. There's no investment on its part that I get up early. And my robot driver certainly won't care if I get to my waxing appointment in one piece.

Nope, I saw "Terminator." First it's our cars, then it's our blenders.

I'm also tired of hearing about how we're just one step away from robots making our lives easier. It's one big tease. I keep waiting for my robot car, my robot bed, my robot sex slave and it never happens!

Face it: Robots just aren't that into us.

I'm not falling for this robot song and dance. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, I throw you into a river. Just like I did with my houseboy, Marco — and he wasn't even a robot.

And that's my gut feeling!

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 2 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com