Two alleged car thieves thought they were high-tech, but they turned out to be just lowbrow.

Independence, Mo., police say Scott Hazel, 40, and Catherin M. Curns, 38, both of Kansas City, stole a brand-new Cadillac from an auto dealership, according to the Independence Examiner.

The dim-witted duo had apparently heard about General Motors' OnStar tracking system (search), which uses satellite tracking to keep tabs on the location of a vehicle.

So they ripped out the fancy-looking antenna from the roof of the car, according to police.

Trouble is, the antenna was meant to receive XM satellite radio (search), not the OnStar tracking signal, which continued to come through loud and clear.

"They're like most people who commit stupid crimes," Broome Oldsmobile dealership manager David Clutts said. "They didn't know what they were doing."

Police tracked the car across the Kansas state line, where Curns and Hazel were picked up later the same day.

Meanwhile, local Cadillac aficionados may want to call the dealership. Clutts explained that the roof damage will have to be fixed.

"People don't like to buy a car that's had repair work done," he explained. "Someone is going to get a good deal on that car."

Excuse Me, Is There a Restroom Around Here?

WHITEFISH BAY, Wis. (AP) — Dewey Coulson's rude awakening came when he walked to the bathroom in the middle of the night, only to find an intruder using the facilities.

"When I turned the corner ... I saw the light was on, and I thought someone had just left it on so I opened the door, and there was this guy sitting on the toilet," Coulson, 19, said. "So I said, 'What are you doing in my house?' And he said, 'I just had to use the bathroom.'"

Coulson ran upstairs to get his stepfather, and when they returned they saw the man trying to leave.

"He was walking really slowly, and then he saw us, and he started running towards these doors and he grabbed the handle and my stepdad and I closed on him," Coulson said.

He and stepfather Dave End wrestled with the man to subdue him and hold him for police Saturday.

Coulson's mother, Cathy End, said the intruder likely wasn't in the house long before heading to the bathroom.

"There was some money out of my wallet, but that's as far as he got, I guess, before nature took over. The toilet part just blows my mind," she said.

Otha Smith, 42, who police said apparently entered through an unlocked door, was charged in Milwaukee County Circuit Court Wednesday with burglary to an occupied residence, a felony.

Because of two prior burglary convictions, he could face 21 years in prison if convicted. A preliminary hearing is scheduled next Tuesday.

Police warn residents against trying to restrain intruders.

"I think we caught him off-guard," Coulson said. "I mean, thank God he didn't have a weapon, or it might have been the end of both of us."

Police were investigating whether the case could be linked to a number of burglaries in the past few months in Whitefish Bay and nearby Shorewood, another Milwaukee suburb.

— Thanks to Out There readers James S. and Ryan P.

Somehow Dustin Hoffman Comes to Mind

COVINGTON, Ga. (AP) — A disgruntled ex-wife wasn't about to hold her peace when her former husband tried to get married.

Shirley Darlene Kent, 27, berated her former spouse last week in a courthouse hallway as he waited to marry his girlfriend, police said.

She even threatened to kill him, prompting deputies to arrest her on a charge of terroristic threats and actions.

But the marriage of Willie Cosby and his girlfriend went forward under police protection at the Newton County Courthouse Annex (search) on April 29.

The dispute started when a deputy saw Kent pulling on Cosby's shirt as he sat on the bench with his future wife, according to police reports.

Deputy Mark Polite said Kent was upset about the pending marriage and she needed to discuss their three children with him.

Then Kent waited outside the courthouse for the couple and began to yell, saying she "only needed five minutes."

That's when she threatened to kill Cosby and was arrested.

Precious Toilet Paper Rushed Across Border as Emergency Aid

OSLO, Norway (AP) — Danes rushed emergency relief to their Nordic siblings in Norway on Friday to help wipe out a toilet paper shortage.

A strike by truckers in Norway has been escalating since it began on March 21, leaving some food stores short of certain products. Even though toilet paper had not been among the items the industry expected to dry up, nervous Norwegians hoarded anyway, leaving shelves bare in some stores.

Denmark's P3 radio station got wind of the Norwegians' dilemma and broadcast a humorous appeal to listeners for contributions of toilet paper to be shipped to their Nordic neighbors.

The Danes were inspired by Norwegians' playful helpfulness when their own strike several years ago caused a run on baking yeast.

"It was a sort of thanks and in the spirit of brotherhood," joked Morten Resen, a host of Danish radio's humor program said.

The shipment of at least 1,000 rolls of toilet paper arrived in the Norwegian capital on Friday, and were quickly distributed on a downtown street to Norwegians who didn't mind being the butt of a Danish prank.

New Jersey Town Briefly Becomes Glamorous, Trendy

TRENTON, New Jersey (AP) — Here's a new Bacardi recipe: Take a small New Jersey community, add $5,000, and for half a month, you've got a locality named after a cocktail.

For the first half of May, the small, rural community of Richland will be called "Mojito," named for a drink made of rum, mint leaves, lime, sugar and club soda. Richland is a section of Buena Vista Township, near Atlantic City.

The Buena Vista Township Committee voted 5-0 on April 26 to authorize the new name after the rum maker Bacardi offered to give the township $5,000 for recreation projects such as new playground equipment in public parks.

A road sign along Route 40 promoting mojitos has already been raised. And Bacardi plans to use images from Richland in advertising promotions.

Buena Vista Mayor Chuck Chiarello sees the renaming as a way to support the local economy, which is heavily based on agriculture. Dalponte Farms in Richland is the main supplier of mint for Bacardi.

"We have a very large farming community here, and we thought this would support it," Chiarello said.

Township Administrator Ron Trebing also thinks the promotion is a good deal.

"It'll improve recreation in the area," Trebing said. "Anything helps out."

A traditional Cuban drink, mojitos (search) have enjoyed new popularity in recent years. The drinks were requested on the HBO television series "Sex and the City" and were mentioned in the movie "Bad Boys II."

Insect Invasion Forces Tourists to Flee

COLOMBO, Sri Lanka (AP) — A 5th-century fortress that's one of Sri Lanka's top tourist attractions reopened Wednesday, days after a rampaging swarm of wasps attacked visitors and forced it to close.

Several dozen tourists from Sri Lanka and abroad were rushed to hospitals with swollen lips and limbs after the insects struck on Saturday at the Sigiriya fortress (search), a World Heritage Site about 100 miles north of the capital, Colombo.

Officials believe the wasps were provoked when visiting school children hurled stones at one of their nests.

Saffron-robed Buddhist monks lit hundreds of oil lamps and incense sticks at the site on Tuesday and chanted prayers to placate the insects.

But numerous wasps were still hovering in the area, and parts of the monument remained off-limits to visitors. There are about a dozen wasp nests at the site, said Thilak Dunuwilla, the government's chief research officer in the area.

"We are hoping they will settle down soon, so that we can reopen the fortress fully," he said, noting that this is the site's busiest time of year. Predominantly Buddhist Sri Lanka is currently celebrating the Vesak festival, which marks the Buddha's birth, death and enlightenment.

Dunuwilla said the scale of Saturday's wasp attack was unprecedented at the site, though two or three visitors had been stung in the past.

A Sri Lankan king built the 594-foot rock fortress in A.D. 475.

Compiled by Foxnews.com's Paul Wagenseil.

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