So yesterday I came across an article on ABC.com in which a reporter named Martha Raddatz asked American soldiers who they wanted for president. Get this: Their answers were "surprising"!

Now, when you hear the word "surprising" from a mainstream news source, it usually means they're presenting a lie they want you to think is true.

The surprise? None of the soldiers mentioned in the story said they'd vote for the Republican. This strikes me as not just weird, but false.

Think about it: A reporter goes out and asks soldiers this question and each one says Barack or Hillary! The soldiers also talked about wanting a pull-out, as well as more emphasis on education and the environment. This doesn't sound like soldier-talk, but a wish list for an NPR reporter in Al Franken's granny pants.

The mainstream press lives for this crap: Finding a conservative group reflecting a change of heart. But, dear reporter, if you're going to rig something, you should have had at least one person say they liked McCain.

And don't insult us by acting "surprised" when you report exactly what you wanted to find all along — especially after excluding any fact that doesn't fit.

But here's my favorite part: At the end of the article, there's a note that says another reporter contributed to this report. So it took two people to write this crap? Now that's surprising.

And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler!

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 2 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com