So Applebee's restaurant is being sued by a customer who claims that their low-calorie meals aren't really low calorie at all. This happened right after an ABC Action News crew investigated the same joint for not serving diet-friendly portions.

And here, my friends, is why our country is in bad shape: For every business that's trying to do good, there are at least five pointless chuckleheads trying to sue it because their expectations are disappointed.

Add to that smarmy consumer reporters who congratulate themselves every time they humiliate a dry cleaner because the poor guy forgot to starch a shirt and we're now living in a world where you can't make a living at all.

We have created a nation not of doers, but of "suers" — people who devote their energies not to making things that improve lives, but filing motions that serve only to dissuade people from taking risks.

Look, if you think Applebee's food is fattening, your first instinct shouldn't be to sue but to take your fat ass elsewhere. Even more, if you're serious about losing weight, don't pick a restaurant that has a menu thicker than a phonebook featuring items like the "Brewtus Steak Burger." Join a gym and stop blaming others for your apron of fat.

It's time for all Americans to rally around companies that provide services as well as jobs. And it is also time to shame lawsuit-happy losers into crawling back under the rock where they came from.

Now, if that doesn't get me an Applebee's gift card, I'm suing.

And if you disagree with me, then you sir are worse than Hitler.

Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com