Here’s how to do the Smoky Mountains without traffic and crowds

If you’ve ever visited the Tennessee side of Great Smoky Mountains National Park, you’ve probably been to Sevierville. You maybe just didn’t realize it.

Sevierville — pronounced suh-VEER-vul — is the hometown of Dolly Parton. But it’s also the town you drive through on your way to Pigeon Forge and Gatlinburg. The place you’ve probably stopped for gas or groceries on the way to your mountain-view rental cabin with black bear-themed decor and a hot tub on the deck.

No shade. I’ve stayed in a dozen of these. It’s a hoot every time.

CLICK HERE TO READ MORE TRAVEL STORIES ON FOXNEWS.COM

But as my husband and I learned earlier this month, Sevierville actually makes a solid case for itself as a weekend destination. And it all started with a very specific predicament.

See, I have one beef with the Smoky Mountains — they aren’t very dog friendly.

Of the more than 150 hiking trails in GSMNP, only two allow dogs. Two. And if we’re being honest, those are less "hikes" and more leisurely nature walks.

So what’s a girl with a clingy German Shepherd to do?

To be fair, I do adore the Smokies. Just last year, I wrote detailed accounts of my treks up to Mount LeConte and to Charlies Bunion. But for this particular trip, I needed an itinerary that worked for me, my husband… and our four-legged child, Rocky.

So we gave Sevierville a shot.

I Did The 'Glam' Kind Of Glamping This Time

In an article last fall, I crashed out a little bit about the overuse of the word "glamping." I’ve seen it used to describe everything from a basic campsite with an outhouse to a luxury cliffside glass dome with a clawfoot tub and a sauna.

In my opinion, true glamping falls somewhere in the middle — where you’re not exactly roughing it, but you’re also not checking into the Four Seasons.

A PERFECT FALL 'GLAMPING' & HIKING WEEKEND JUST OUTSIDE OF CHATTANOOGA

When we pulled up to The Ridge, my first thought was: I’ve never seen so many RVs in my life. Everything from compact pull-behinds to decked-out motorhomes that put my actual house to shame, all lined up in pristine rows.

For those of us who don’t own beds on wheels, The Ridge also offers tiny homes and glamping tents. We went with the tent.

And when I say tent… it was a tent. It just happened to sit on a massive wooden platform with two cozy bedrooms, a full bathroom, a kitchenette and a living room with a TV.

It didn’t suck.

Once we got Rocky settled in, my husband and I made a beeline for the pool. They have two pools, but as a seasoned traveler, let me offer a quick tip: if one of the pools has a lazy river, that’s the one you pick.

So I spent a solid chunk of the afternoon blissfully floating in circles in an inner tube and yapping with other guests until I could no longer ignore the fact that I was starving.

Dinner took us to downtown Sevierville to a place called Pinchy’s. I was skeptical about a lobster and raw bar in the mountains of Tennessee, but it came highly recommended. Plus, they allow dogs on the patio, so we figured, why not?

Touché, friends.

The Connecticut lobster roll — with extra butter, because vacation — was incredible. And the patio atmosphere was even better. An Elvis tribute artist named Hayden Lynn was performing. If you closed your eyes and forgot it was 2026, you’d swear The King himself was crooning into your earholes.

At one point, our server asked if Rocky wanted a "puppy burger." Obviously, the answer was yes. What arrived was a bunless, unseasoned hamburger in a little dog bowl, which he inhaled in approximately three seconds.

Back at the tent, we cracked open a bottle of red and lit up the fire pit on the deck. There were no wine glasses available, so we drank our Malbec out of coffee mugs.

I guess that’s the "roughing it" part of this glamping trip.

The American Eagle Foundation Is A Hidden Gem

On Saturday, we had a couple of activities lined up that weren’t exactly dog-friendly, so we dropped Rocky off at The Wag Social for day camp. And for a dog that usually can’t stand to be 10 feet away from us, he forgot his humans existed when they let him loose to run and play with the other pups.

After grubbing at Flapjack’s Pancake Cabin — required dining if you find yourself on the Parkway at breakfast time — we headed to the American Eagle Foundation.

I actually wrote a separate piece on AEF, so I won’t dive too deep here. But if you’ve never seen a bald eagle up close, they are stunning. AEF is home to several, along with hawks, falcons, owls and vultures.

MEET LINCOLN, THE BALD EAGLE BEHIND THE SUPER BOWL'S BEST COMMERCIAL

The foundation focuses on conservation, rehabilitation, breeding and education — basically everything that goes into protecting birds of prey. Some of the birds in their care are being rehabbed with the goal of releasing them back into the wild. Others, for various reasons, can’t survive on their own.

We got a tour from a volunteer named Nancy, and she was a wealth of knowledge. She knew everything about every single bird in AEF’s care and was able to tell us all about their backstories, personalities and quirks.

We even got to feed a chopped up rat to an eagle named Carson. Using tongs, of course, because I’d like to keep my fingers.

AEF is also home to Lincoln — famous for soaring through the stadium before Philadelphia Eagles home games and for that Budweiser Super Bowl commercial. He took over for Challenger, who is still in AEF’s care, but now enjoying retired life at Dollywood.

ZERO BS. JUST DAKICH. TAKE THE DON'T @ ME PODCAST ON THE ROAD. DOWNLOAD NOW!

Ziplining Through The Mountains

I honestly had no idea what to expect when we signed up for a ziplining tour at Foxfire Adventure Park. They offer two options — the Waterfall Canopy tour and the Goliath tour — and we went with the first, which promised seven ziplines, two skybridges and (as the name suggests) a waterfall.

My husband’s zipline experience consisted of a summer in Costa Rica nearly 20 years ago, and I’d never done it at all. So, really, it was the blind leading the blind.

Thankfully, we had two actual professionals, Brittany and Tim, making sure we didn’t plummet hundreds of feet to our death. If they hadn’t been there to hype me up, I might have chickened out.

Because these were not your rinky-dink state fair ziplines. These were genuine monster lines stretching between mountains and across canopies of trees. One of the lines was a quarter-mile long.

Before we took off, they gave us a quick heads-up: on that long line, you have to position your body just right — lean back, knees up, basically curl yourself into a cannonball.

Sometimes, they said, people don’t make it all the way across and have to be… rescued. What that rescue entails, I do not know. But as a smaller human, I was apparently a prime candidate for getting stuck.

"Don’t worry," Brittany told me. "I’ll give you a good shove."

Happy to report I made it. Thank goodness, too, because that would have been a day-ruiner. Brittany would later try to convince me to ride the last line upside down. I did not. Bless her, she had way too much confidence in me. Maybe next time.

Speaking of next time, the Goliath tour has an even wilder zipline that’s a half mile long and 500 feet in the air. So that’s an option for you sickos out there.

After all the zipping, we were treated to complimentary hard cider tastings in a building that looks like something you’d find in a hobbit’s shire. (To the guy I saw sipping cider out of a paper cup while your kids wore themselves out at the gem mine, your secret’s safe with me.)

YOU DON'T NEED A KAYAK TO APPRECIATE NORTHERN WISCONSIN'S APOSTLE ISLANDS

One cool thing about Foxfire is that your zipline ticket grants access to their 150-acre property for seven days. So you can come back to hike their trails, check out the waterfall (from the ground, this time), or just wander around and enjoy the views.

The trails are dog-friendly, too, so we made a mental note to bring Rocky back.

The Wag Social Spoiled Our Dog Rotten

When we picked up Rocky from Wag Social, he looked like a million bucks. We had asked them to give him a bath while he was there, and he came ou not just bathed — but brushed, de-shedded, nails trimmed, smelling like roses. Probably the handsomest he’s ever looked. Which is really saying something, considering he’s exceptionally handsome under normal circumstances.

They even sent him home with a glowing "report card" and photos of him playing with other dogs and staff members. As an obsessed dog mom, there are few things in the world that make me happier than someone telling me how awesome my boy is. Sue me.

Anyway, Wag Social does boarding and day camp. So they’re a great option to make sure your pups are well taken care of if you want to spend the day at Dollywood or go hike one of those dog-prohibited trails in the Smoky Mountains.

Pro tip: If you’re wanting to see the national park and feel overwhelmed by all the options, check out Smoky Mountain Guides. They do guided hikes, van tours, kayaking trips and even fly fishing excursions. It’s a great way to enjoy the great outdoors while letting someone else do the legwork.

Post Hike Beers

For those who have been reading my travel stories for a while now, you know we end every adventure with a good beer. If there’s a brewery, I’m going to find it.

If you also love a good slice after a hike (who doesn’t), Gatlinburg brewing has killer pizzas. And they’re 10-inch pies, so you have an excuse to order one for every person in your group. A pizza flight to go with your beer flight. IPA lovers, get the Breakfast Juice.

If you’re looking for a bigger menu, Iron Forge is your spot. I’m not exaggerating when I say this might be the most pup-friendly restaurant I’ve ever been to. Dogs are allowed everywhere — in the dining room and outside. We had dinner inside and then took Rocky out to the courtyard to enjoy the live music and sip on a nightcap. It was a perfect evening.

So there you go, a trip to the Smoky Mountains without the traffic of Gatlinburg or the hokey dinner theaters of Pigeon Forge. 

Again, no shade. I love me some Dolly’s Stampede. But I also love getting off the beaten path.

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE FOX NEWS APP

So next time you’re grabbing groceries in Sevierville, take a look around, stay a while, and maybe ride a line through a mountain oasis.

Just remember — lean back, knees up and make like a cannonball.