Who's Just Not Into Who?

JNTIY Rating: 2. While we can picture a few conversations where the May-December thing rears its ugly head (Demi: "Remember that awesome REO Speedwagon song 'Keep on Loving You?'" Ashton: "RE-Who?") Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher are supertight. TITEO: Totally Into Each Other. (AP)

JNTIY Rating: 6. They have four marriages between them, reputations for diva behavior, and are both accustomed to being top dog. Their recent twins give us hope for their future, but we're not buying tickets to their 2015 Duet Tour if you know what we mean. KOIEO: Kind Of Into Each Other. (AP)

JNTIY Rating: 0. Is there a couple in America more in tune with each other than the President and First Lady? From their joint interviews to their body language to their fist bumps, they are two peas in a presidential pod. COHPIEO: Completely 100% Into Each Other. (AP)

JNTIY Rating: 3. Okay, they have accumulated six kids in three years, so they see a future together. But there's something about all of those kids (built-in distractions?) and all of those photo opps ("look at me" syndrome?) that gives us pause. IEOUTGB: Into Each Other Until They Get Bored. (AP)

JNTIY Rating: 7. From their forced banter to the awkardness of Kara DiGuarini taking some of the female spotlight from Paula Abdul on "American Idol," these two are walking on eggshells. Wait until the show goes live during the voting rounds. We see sparks, tears, and huffy walk-offs ahead. MIWFR: Making It Work For Ratings. (Reuters)

JNTIY Rating: 10. Evan Rachel Wood liked Mickey Rourke enough to make out with him last week, but now she's apparently having second thoughts and saying he's "too old" for her. Somehow, we don't think Mickey cares either way. LRATVMS: Leaving Rambling and Threatening Voice Mails Stage. (AP)

JNTIY Rating: 1. Rock star Robert Plant is so into country singer Allison Krause (professionaly) that he nixed a Led Zeppelin reunion tour to tour with her instead. Which is why we now despise Allison Krause. We were too young to see Zep the first time around. We want to see them now. And she is standing in our way. WLTIEO: Whole Lotta Too Into Each Other. (AP)

JNTIY Rating: 8. He's a star quarterback who chokes in big games, she's a self-admittedly ditsy singer at a career crossroads. Even if Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson were into each other, we don't think either is smart enough to know what to do about it. PTDFITM: Probably Too Dumb For It To Matter. (Reuters)

JNTIY Rating: 5. They seem to like each other. They act nice enough. But Vanessa Hudgens and Zac Efron are Disney stars. We smell a "made for the cameras romance" rat. We're too cynical. PNRBKOIEO: Probably Not Real But Kind of Into Each Other. (AP)

JNTIY Rating: 3. Unfortunately for the rest of the sentient males on the planet, Megan Fox seems to really dig her older, former "90210" star boyfriend Brian Austin Green. NFBPIEO: Not Fair But Pretty Into Each Other. (AP)