What Really Matters to Media Matters?
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If you're like me — and, congratulations if you are — then you try to enjoy your weekends. For example, I spent last Saturday in bed, watching my favorite soaps, eating doughnut holes basted in NyQuil. I call them Happy Holes and after seven of them, you think you're an Angora rabbit.
And this leads me to a key life lesson: NyQuil rules.
But also: You know you've truly succeeded in life when your adversaries aren't having fun on their weekends.
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When someone who hates you spends their Saturdays consumed by hating you, then you can safely say, you've won without even raising a finger.
I mention this because I received a press release on Saturday — yes, on Saturday — from none other than Media Matters. Yes, instead of playing t-ball with their kids (or their ferrets dressed as kids), this outlet of internal misery just had to publish a press release about Fox News's coverage of Haiti.
Yes, while everyone else tries to do actual stuff, Media Matters is still using the earthquake to hammer its No. 1 enemy/one true love.
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The press release came to me on my BlackBerry and it filled me with sadness for Media Matters. I wanted to invite them over for paninis. I won a grill in a raffle and have been dying to try it out (on food, this time).
But instead, here's some advice, Double M: The weekends are for your family, your hobbies, your festering addiction to prescription meds. It's not for obsessing over adversaries. And you should notice a trend by now: The more you whine, the higher Fox News climbs.
Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com