Men Are Scum; Women Are Stupid
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So Jesse James, the hulky hubby of Sandra Bullock, got busted cheating on the delightful actress.
Here is a picture of Sandra Bullock.
Here is a picture of the woman James cheated with, Bombshell Magee.
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One more time: Sandra Bullock and Bombshell Magee.
Who would have thought if Jesse were to cheat, it would be with Marilyn Manson?
Who's next? Cris Angel? Take a look at Cris.
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Yep, my money is on that freak.
Anyway, this reveals one essential truth about life: Men are scum; women are stupid.
First, let's take the "men are scum" part. Sadly most men on this planet would jam their idiot-stick into anything, as long as it doesn't electrocute them. Although, I'm not even sure that's true: If you put an Oreck upright vacuum in some fishnets, Bill Maher would bang it.
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Fact is, it doesn't matter who you're married to, men desire sexual novelty more than oxygen and it's up to them to rein it in. Some can't. Case in point: This dirtbag James cheats not just on a lovely, rich woman, but America's sweetheart. That's what separates dirtbags from non-dirtbags: Non-dirtbags make the effort.
Onto the "women are stupid" part: As much as I sympathize with Sandra — who I've had a crush on since "Love Potion No. 9" — there were signs. Her husband married a porn star. As an expert in red flags would say, "Holy crap. That's a red flag."
What does this mean? Well, there are millions of good men out there, but she chose this creep. Why? Because the way men enjoy sexual risk-taking, women find emotional adventures a thrill. Good women choose bad men all the time and all the good men are left wondering, "What's wrong with me?"
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I just hope Sandra dumps this jerk and marries someone who deserves her. Like Rupert Everett — he seems like a nice chap.
And if you disagree with me, I'll kill you... with kisses.
Greg Gutfeld hosts "Red Eye with Greg Gutfeld" weekdays at 3 a.m. ET. Send your comments to: redeye@foxnews.com