Ladies, you can drink. But you can't do it in the presence of good-looking men.
That's the message Britain's Committee of Advertising Practice told liquor companies last week, after it decided some ads made too much of a connection between alcohol and sex.
Upset by an ad for Lambrini wine coolers that showed three fun-loving single gals "hooking" a hunky bloke, the prissy bureaucrats wrote, according to the Times of London: "We would advise that the man in the picture should be unattractive — overweight, middle-aged, balding etc."
In fact, the CAP's new rules forbid "the implication that drinking alcohol is essential to the success of a social occasion" and mandate that "links must not be made between alcohol and seduction, sexual activity or sexual success."
Several British advertising campaigns may be jeopardized by the rulings, including a $4 million contract George Clooney has with Martini brand vermouth.
Lambrini objected to the ruling, questioning whether balding, middle-aged and/or paunchy men who were still considered attractive, such as Sean Connery or Jack Nicholson, would be off limits.
"Beauty is, after all, in the eye of the beholder," reasoned Lambrini owner John Halewood.
Sex Author Accused of Threatening Stripper With Sword
NEW YORK, N.Y. (New York Post) — Is that a samurai sword in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
The answer was a resounding yes and no for New York sex-book author Eric Yudelove.
On Tuesday, the 58-year-old Syosset, L.I., resident was busted for allegedly threatening a strip-club bouncer with a Japanese-style sword.
But later in the week, out on bail, he allegedly stole his own car from a police impound lot, returned to the strip club and threatened to blow it up.
At first, the author of "Taoist Yoga and Sexual Energy" was charged with criminal possession of a weapon and menacing, after allegedly waving the sword outside the Hustler Club on West 51st Street.
Cops said he'd taken the sword from his vehicle after a dancer rebuffed his advances.
"He started bringing her presents and becoming a bit of a pain in the a—," a police source said. "When it became clear she wasn't interested in anything other than his money, he went to see the manager and demanded she be fired."
When those demands fell on deaf ears, he became unruly and was thrown out, the source said, only to return "a few minutes later ... waving the samurai."
Cops added that they later found an Uzi automatic weapon in his vehicle.
And as if that weren't enough, the bailed-out Yudelove, whose real name is Eric Steven Edelstein, allegedly took his car out of the NYPD pound without permission, drove back to the club and vowed to blow it to smithereens.
Police re-arrested him at his home on Saturday.
Now he's charged with tampering with evidence, intimidating witnesses and making terrorist threats.
Hooker Rats on Herself
NEW YORK, N.Y. (New York Post) — Cops have busted a $2,000-an-hour hooker dubbed "New York's No. 1 Escort" after she blabbed to the media about her profession.
Natalia McLennan — who was splashed across the cover of New York magazine three weeks ago and has been interviewed on TV talk shows — was charged Wednesday with money laundering, prostitution and promoting prostitution, her lawyer, Barry Zone, told The Post.
Zone said his comely client's overexposure in the press led to her arrest Wednesday morning by vice cops armed with a search warrant at her Broome Street apartment.
"It's outrageous," he said.
"They pieced together basically quotes from all the articles about her and interviews that she's done....
"They have no person who has ever seen her perform an act of prostitution. It's insane. They've arrested her because of some newspaper articles and some sensationalism."
Zone said McLennan, 23, has since been released and has gone into hiding until her court date.
"She's obviously very troubled by this situation," he said. "She's just sort of lying low until we defend the case."
But McLennan, who claims she made $1.5 million a year servicing her high-roller clients, made no secret of her work at NY Confidential, a swanky, Moroccan-themed brothel.
She became infamous overnight when she struck a provocative pose for the cover of New York under the headline, "N.Y.'s No. 1 Escort."
She also copped to her line of work in an interview with The Post two months ago but claimed "I don't do that anymore" when asked if she was still working as a prostitute.
The New York magazine profile also chronicled the rise and fall of self-professed pimp Jason Itzler, and his love affair with McLennan, his top girl.
Itzler claimed NY Confidential raked in $500,000 a month during the year and a half he was in business, with clients that included hedge-fund titans, politicians, lawyers and even an NFL quarterback.
Despite her arrest, McLennan's lawyer claims her prostitution days are behind her.
"There was a time period when this existed," he said, "but she's not out there committing prostitution. She's certainly not doing anything wrong."
Woman Says Cemetery Lost Her Dad's Grave
LIBERTYVILLE, Ill. (AP) — Mary Hurst wants to honor her 80-year-old dying mother's wish: to be buried aside her husband, Hurst's father, who died of cancer nearly four decades ago.
Problem is, officials at the cemetery where she says he was buried say they can't find his grave.
Hurst says she attended the burial for her father, Dragoljub Ilic, at St. Sava Cemetery in Libertyville on Nov. 10, 1966. But when she recently called the cemetery from her Fort Worth, Texas, home, she was told the grave site cannot be located, she said.
"Just think about what they've done. You have my mother's last wishes, which can't be taken care of," Hurst said. She said she called to inquire about having her father disinterred and moved to Texas so her mother could be buried alongside him.
Cemetery administrator Sasha Nedic said he has looked several times for Ilic's grave site. He said it's possible the grave either is unmarked or was moved in 1979, when a change in ownership resulted in some graves being moved to a property in nearby Grayslake.
"If he was buried here and nobody wrote it down, there's nothing I can do. She doesn't have any documents, and we don't either," Nedic said.
Ilic's death certificate says he was buried in St. Sava.
Hurst said the family paid $245 for a vault and $150 for a reserved grave for her mother to Muzyka & Sons Funeral Home in Chicago, which handled arrangements. But she said she has no record of a grave marker.
Margaret Muzyka, owner of the funeral home, said a book lists Ilic's funeral and burial in St. Sava. But she said the home's records from 1966 were destroyed in a flood and there are no records of a tombstone.
"(Hurst) has no proof" of a grave marker, Muzyka said. "With all the years that passed, nobody went to visit or can remember where his is?"
Hurst said she and her mother saw the grave marker when they visited the cemetery three months after her father was buried. The family moved from Illinois a few months later and never returned to the site, she said.
Dentures Removed From Man's Bronchial Tube
TAIPEI, Taiwan (AP) — A Taiwanese man is breathing easier after a surgeon removed a missing set of dentures from one of his bronchial tubes — three years after he lost them in a fall.
Surgeon Chen Chun-lei said the unidentified man visited his clinic several days ago complaining of shortness of breath and a high fever.
The man had no idea the missing denture was the culprit, causing a mild case of pneumonia.
"He had looked for the missing dentures for three years but they were nowhere to be found," Chen said.
Chen operated after an X-ray detected an unknown object in one of his bronchial tubes — what turned out to be the missing denture.
Chen said the 45-year-old man did not suffer serious breathing problems earlier, possibly because the lower denture of eight teeth had stuck in part of the bronchial tube but did not entirely block the passage of air.
"The patient might have needed to have part of his lung removed if the denture was not located before it caused severe damage," Chen said Monday. "He was a lucky man to find it when he did."
Compiled by FOXNews.com's Paul Wagenseil and Jennifer D'Angelo.
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